truthsayer009:
OP, if i get married and have what you have right now I would totally be happy.

10 years of marriage and your wife still looks really good to 100% is rare. You need to ask God for forgiveness because you dont deserve what you have.
Even if your wife wants to play around or go back in shape, it should motivate you to join her in the Gym, get yourself in shape too. Go out with her to events, look like a power couple.

You guys always admire Beyonce when you see her. You think it was by Juju she maintained her figure after 2 kids, imagine if she was with Men like you?

What makes you think she doesnt want to take care of your children.

why don't you join her in looking good?

TempleHouse:

I'm afraid you're not equipped to understand the relationship between married people since you're not married yet.
Every Men has a Private, Public and Secret Life, I must confessed. It is how you defend each life that matters...
Suggesting that couple should have access to each phone is quite unnecessary and an affront to inviting unnecessary stress.
For example, many women rejected the advances from friends and neighbours without the need to inform the husband for obvious reasons.
Having access to her phone anytime may bring jealousy, envy and suspicion which is quite dangerous and unhealthy to good relationship.
Some men too have some women they relate with regularly without having affairs, yet the wife will never allows such relationship.
No matter what, some people are not bound to be together and you can't explain that for different reasons. !

Icon79:
He sure did. But sometimes you don't see clearly when you're in "love". That's why they say that love is blind


O pari

TonyeBarcanista:
The marriage is already dead

LordKO:
@OP

It's obvious that you married another man's wife/the wrong woman. A true wife's invaluableness (to her husband, a sane husband of course) lies in the attributes of selflessness, meekness and sweetness - unfortunately she possesses only sweetness which isn't enough to guarantee you peace of mind. And a virtuous woman knows the difference between dressing classy and dressing slutty. So, I support your decision.

Ignore anyone who'll tell you that insecurity is worrying you.

Samolaogun:
She has always been outgoing. The partying started heavily around last year. She is fond of leaving the children with her mum.

lilbest4:
log in her Instagram and Facebook on your phone it is very easy, I can teach you if you want and if you have iPhone, login her WhatsApp on your safari browser

Icon79:
You're apparently not married, bro. You might think you can handle all these things until you get yourself entangled in one.

Meanwhile, I think he's handling it in his own way. He's just looking for a good advice before he does something drastic … however, I agree that the social media is probably not the best avenue to handle the situation. When it comes to marital issue(s), I am a big believer that the two people involved are "best" situated to finding a lasting solution to the problem(s).


O pari

Samolaogun:
Oga my problem is not her looking good as you can see I praised her for it.

My problem is her scandalous behaviour, partying every minute, too friendly behaviour and extreme seductive dressing. No man will be comfortable with such behaviour. As it is, I just want her out of the house. Do not envy what is shallow, as you see me so I’m dreaming of a quiet decent woman who will give me peace of mind over this scandalous show off wife that I have at the moment. Be careful what you wish for.

segun18:


You this woman..you dey see Well .I

ericsmith:




Buh the man appreciates the fact that his wife looks good & stay in shape.
The problem here is the wife still rolling & mingling like she is single ... there should be some limitations as a married woman

UIA04:



Your wife is obviously a siren who just discovered her sex appeal. This also seems like a mid life crisis.

She is a sanguine and for every one with a sanguine personality the more you try cage them the more they break out. Even if she hasn't cheated she'll just fall into another mans arms with all the pressure because she seems eager to enjoy what she thinks she has lost.

You need to calm down and let everything seem normal again.
Infact, be more loving so she doesnt suspect anything.

Go underground and start investigating. It would be easier to just hack her phone, though.

ornicus:
The responses are funny though. A lot of guys are under the illusion that women are pikins they can just boss around. I forbid you from browsing Instagram, I will take away your privileges. I will check your phone. How?

GrabHisBalls:
If only she could come back to her senses, her marriage could be saved.

But on a second thought, you men love them slayers na? Op's wife just refused to draw the lines.

mysticgal:

My dear I don tire for men,
What do you guys want?

dairykidd:

We want a real woman who's beautiful inside out, sexy yes, in good shape and health yes, fun hell yeah.. but a flirtatious bichh who still hangs around her fvck buddies and doesn't know when to draw the line on being married and remaining married Fvck NO!!

The Op na idiot because he already knew what he was getting into but allowed her beauty and charms to restrict his brains from functioning fully


Farm tools are meant for farming.. u can't change that

Princedapace:


Seems u guys don't understand. She flirts with guys. One is constantly addressing her as his love.

She goes partying and dressed seductively partying.. Who is she seducing at birthday parties?

She doesnt care about her kids. She flirts online. These are reg flags. The one is either phone romancing or romancing in real sense. Bro, if she go stop, divorce her make she continue her life style. Pls don't listen to anyone who makes u feel u are stalking her. U aren't. Marriage comes with some sacrifices. If I have a wife who parties all day and all night with seductive wears, and Im not there, it doesn't send good message about her. But u can't force people to change. U can path ways so she can flirt more.

HIGHESTPOPORI:
Chei more than one month,update ur diary

sinaj:
Lwkmd

Isnt this what some men are praying for? To get a wife that will remain sexy and goodlooking after child birth.
If it was the opposite you would have still opened a thread too.
One man meat is another's poison sha

Oga work on your insecurities jore or better still wait till you catch her redhanded before you give yourself hbp.

TonyeBarcanista:

Your first paragraph though but lemme tell you...

You don't have to be a prisoner before you know the consequences of engaging in criminal activities neither do you have to be a married man before knowing how to handle situations.

In life you learn from your environment via experience of people or that of yourself. Meanwhile, the latter could be dangerous (what OP is passing through) while the former guard against experiencing the latter.

A man must know how to handle his affairs without involving people... The OP bringing his problem to the forum shows how WEAK he is and it is why his wife is using his destiny to play draft.

He has to take action NOW! He doesn't even need to sample opinion before knowing what to do.. #MyOpinion

daddytime:
If it smells like shiit bro, trust me it can't be burger, its a 100% shiit

Been there seen all...

Never under-estimate your gut instincts. Thats how nature and God speaks to you.

Samolaogun:
So I got married to my wife 10 years ago. She was 24 at the time and now we are blessed with 2 kids. My wife has always been one of those self centred all about her looks type of person but I just ignored it and saw the good side of it. After two kids and at 34 my wife still looks very good, I guess that’s one of the perks of marrying young.

But one thing I noticed is that when she was pregnant with our first son all she ever talked about from day one was getting back in shape and losing weight, she was never excited about being a mother or bringing life into the world. Well She’s maintained her shape and when you look at her you will think she’s 25/26. I’m grateful for that however

Now the downside of this is that she gets a lot of Male attention which she entertains and I’m not comfortable with. On her instagram she’s following a lot of males which I’m not comfortable with.

I addressed it to her and she complains I’m being paranoid that they are school friends. When she goes out with her friends she’s always over dressing and looking seductive almost like a single lady looking for toasters.

She’s that over friendly type of woman, always on her phone, likes to do too much shakara and it’s just starting to irritate me. I checked her phone last week and theres one guy that keeps on addressing her as ‘love’. I’ve not addressed it to her yet because I’m waiting to catch her red handed so she will not be able to come up with any flimsy excuse.

One day when her and her friends came to my house to meet up for a birthday party, they all dressed like a bunch of ashewos. The following day we got into a huge argument because I warned her to never try that again.

She is still stubborn and she hasn’t changed. Im fed up of her attitude I’m thinking of separating from this woman before she gives me high blood pressure. She’s not a homely wife at all. All she wanna do is go out, to even attend to the kids effectively is now becoming a problem. I’m tired.

Vasgas:
Always look out for relationship red flags..
A failed relationship is better than a failed marriage.
If he slap you when you are still dating and call's it mistake, my friend that mistake his bound to happen during marriage.
He don't like spending on you, not even a little..
He always feels insecure...

Marriage is an institutions that one does not graduate from even after spending year's.

"Everyone  Every man at the beginning doth set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk, then that which is worse: but thou hast kept the good wine until now" This statements means some might even passed the relationship test but would still not be a virtuous woman. its God that giveth a man a virtuous woman.

Sir, my little advice for you is to seat your wife down and reason with her, let her know you are not comfortable with the mode of her dressing and also talk to her mum that you didn't marry her but her daughter.
If this failed to yield a good result then look for someone she listen to and report her.
Be careful so that your kids we not start seeing your wife mum as their biological mother.


@From a single brother

donstan18:
This is insecurity at its peak since you're yet to catch her.

Or maybe, just maybe, you have very good reason to think and feel the way you are feeling because there are some flirty activities that is expected of a married Nigerian to quit or reduce.


But in my opinion bruv, I'll advice you to reduce the way you stalk her phone and life and focus on how to train your kids, before you die of HBP, because you never complained of her inability to contribute on the welfare of your kids, you are just uncomfortable with her Slaying life . Stop stalking her so that you don't find out what you've been longing to see. If possible; Start slaying too.

Not all women are ready to turn to an old mgbeke because of marriage, some like looking good and you should be happy you have one because they are few.

TonyeBarcanista:

Maybe for the OP but not someone my kind sha... She is beyond redemption


Who love slayers?

Mires:
Na Yoruba woman?

HISWAYS:
OP.....pls get her pregnant again for the third child...and everything will fall in place.

Thank me later