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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her (30929 Views)
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Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by adontcare(f): 11:38am On Oct 02, 2019 |
johndan103:op no offence. Ur mum don't want you to have a home. She want u all by herself. She don't care about u getting a family. If u like marry the woman she want, she will still be a thorn in that woman flesh. And because u love and honor her, ur wife will be miserable all thru d marriage. U will not have a peaceful home. What I advice u to do is marry the woman u love and feel u can stay with u in good and bad times. Love and honour ur mum but follow ur heart and watch how u will be happy with ur soul. 26 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by patorial(m): 11:44am On Oct 02, 2019 |
Is this your final year project? Remember these things : Your mother is already married. You can never marry your mom. You mom seems selfish! Sorry for saying this. Remember that you are trying to make a family for your sef nd not for your mother. You know what is good for your, don't go and make the mistake of marrying someone you don't know just because your mother likes her. 29 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by johndan103: 12:15pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
patorial: No it is not a project but my reality. I tried to write it in a logical way so that it can easily be understood by the reader Thanks anyways! 9 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by THUNDER4real(m): 12:48pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
johndan103:Life and society is not a graveyard, their must be turbulence. I believe it is time to face this issue with hot head. Your mother has finished her own life, she is not suppose to interfere in yours unnecessarily except through prayers and advice. You are a young Adult, if you don't go for your desire now it will affect your tomorrow. Furthermore, If the reasons your mum are giving are tangible reasons on: Spirituality, not being submissive, the parents of the lady are not together, I think you should listen to her. In addition, prayer is the key, if you are going for Hauwa, pray and be sure of things about her. This is important, as to prevent you wishing you heeded your mother's advice. 3 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by breadplanets(f): 1:21pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
I only have advise for Hauwa...... Ruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun ![]() 40 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by johndan103: 1:32pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
breadplanets: Why should Hauwa run when we both love each other? Will you give her another husband after she runs? No relationship is free from complications. If she runs now for how long will she continue running from all challenges? 14 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by Acidosis(m): 1:35pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
In Nigeria, all mothers are good but all girls are bad. ![]() ![]() Better tell your mom the truth and get hold of yourself. 27 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by breadplanets(f): 1:36pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
johndan103:love ko ![]() ![]() 1 Like |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by johndan103: 1:37pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
Acidosis: Ok i will. Thanks for your contribution. |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by sisisioge: 1:42pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
![]() ![]() ![]() I think your mom is afraid of another woman taking you from her. Solution, don't tell her anything again, get to meet your future in-laws, continue to get to know your babe, stop being on the pills, prepare for a life together and invite your mom to the wedding. Good luck. 22 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by johndan103: 1:46pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
sisisioge: Thanks!! This is by far the most interesting advise so far. 15 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by nlPoster: 1:50pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by tpiar: 1:51pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
Fake story, fake op. 1 Like |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by elektra(f): 2:31pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
Since it is looking like your mother will never accept your choice of wife, you have only two options. You either marry Hauwa, or your mother’s choice. If you go ahead and marry hauwa, be ready to grow some balls and protect your wife. It is obvious your mother will try to frustrate the girl. You have to be ready to stand up to your mother and put her in her place when the need arises. In-laws can really destroy peaceful marriages and should not be underrated. Hauwa, if you are reading. Please seriously reconsider if this is the family you want to spend the rest of your life with. I am a firm believer in wives loving their husbands family as their own and vice versa. Even with families that love and accept you, problems will arise talk less of families that are obviously against you. Think very well before you enter oh, marriage is hard enough without all this other stress. 28 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by johndan103: 3:02pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
elektra: Thanks for your advise. I will be more firm and stand up to my mom protecting my fiancee and future wife. I have tried to be respectful to my mom but she is interpreted as weakness. I wont allow anyone put my Fiancee down phycologically cos she is a nice person and deserves to be treated right. Please dont ask Hauwa to reconsider, dont scare my baby. I will intensify efforts with different strategies to get my mom to order. Shes making our lovely family appear disfunctional, and it saddens me. 9 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by chii8(f): 3:36pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
She is just being a MOM,it seems you are the only son,you know other than this issue, your mum is nice.Make your mum miss you,no calls,no visits,reject anything from her,do that for sometime and see if she will come to herself,while at that always put a call to dad but don't call her...pretend you're ignoring her let's see. 7 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by UjuJoan2: 3:53pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
johndan103: My husband's mum also wanted her to marry one of her friend's daughter . . popular family, quite influential. And just like you, they just didn't get along. I remember when my husband asked me to marry him, it was like a joke because we were friends, we weren't even dating. The first time the mother met me, she told me out-rightly that her son had 'better' options but turned them down, and she wanted to see if he will finally bring home 'gold'! ![]() Long story short, I eventually became her best DIL. How did it happen? My husband did most of the work . . . never complained to her about me, even when I did terrible things. Never let her talk down to me or treat me badly, be made it clear that I was a no-go area. On my own part I just closed my eyes to everything she did. No matter how hurt or angry I felt at her actions, I never showed it to her. I remained respectful and tolerated everything. Yes ma . . No ma . . . That was my slogan! Afterall at the end of the day I had my husband beside me, nothing else mattered. She died three months ago and I miss her dearly . . . . my heart literally breaks each time I think of her ![]() ![]() 46 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by johndan103: 4:04pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
chii8: Thanks for your advise. I would have ignored her if she was not already ignoring me. We had an argument about Hauwa 2 days ago, she hung up the phone and asked me to forget about her if I go ahead with my plans. I dont want to reach out to her either but shes has already started the ignorance as she usually does. 2 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by midnighter(f): 4:09pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
Manipulation and emotional abuse. Your mother is very selfish, it doesn't matter if she trained you blah blah, that's what she was supposed to do. It doesn't give her license to ride roughshod over your life If she decides not to bless your union it's her problem. Even orphans get married without any kind of blessing and nothing bad has happened to them till today Better go ahead and marry the Hauwa and don't mind your self-centred mom. She will probably come around after a few months but you have to keep an eye on her so that she won't start playing stupid games with your wife when she visits By the way there's nothing wrong with your writing style, I appreciate that you took time to format it and write in clear paragraphs that somebody will easily read and understand. Most of the time people will just write a huge block of jumbled, garbled gobbledegook that takes about 3 rounds of squinting your eyes to get what the heck the person is ranting about 41 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by Nobody: 4:31pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
. 8 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by Bluehill1051: 4:34pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
johndan103:My friend, will you keep quiet! Shut up! Ode! |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by Fountainofyouth(f): 4:54pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
I really do like the way you write, says alot about your personality, Your mum is s****** sorry to say, she cannot dictate your life cos you are an adult, you just have to make a stand on marrying hauwa, if she still insists, tell her that if you agree to her choice, you will be miserable and will extend the misery to her, tell her you'll treat her choice with disdain, beat her, and disgrace your family and the lady's family, sha say alot of evil, wicked things that will make her scared of you ooo, and make sure you're screaming at the top of your voice when saying it, as in beat your chest let it puff out, you know what I mean nah, if your mama nor fear you or let you be ehn, I nor know ooo...... Hauwa, If you're reading this and you really want to be with mister Op, you have work to do, when you both marry, she will clearly not like you and may do things, but let it slide, dont let it bug you, what you should do is make his mother your best friend, as in always be on her good side, let her be your gist buddy, bring her so close to you that his mother will realise her mistake one good day, apologise and continue to bless the day she approved of you, believe me she will come around, good luck. 7 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by Acidosis(m): 5:02pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
chii8: 7 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by chii8(f): 7:52pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
[quote author=Acidosis post=82776264][/quote] Ah...ah Oga,kilode?sometimes mums can be dramatic nah but it doesn't mean they are bad,the Op just needs to man up that's all. 1 Like |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by browseyd22(m): 8:00pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
Oga be a man....I had same problem bt mine was that my mom wants me to marry my first girlfriend dat she like so much, d girl is nice bt also a cheat n she blv wat frnds say, long story short I told my mom she wasn't welcome at my wedding, gave her family a cooked up story, we have done introduction, marriage is November, it's her God given duty to train n cater 4 u 12 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by browseyd22(m): 8:02pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
Take a stand and be a man,ur mom wants a woman she can control so she can control u, she wants u to be under her all ur life and u 're proving her right 15 Likes |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by bukatyne(f): 8:30pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
johndan103: @John, It hurts to say that your mom is very manipulative and is choosing a wife bacuse she wants a woman She can control. Her selfish desire to have access to your resources (time, money, love, attention etc.) is stronger than the love she has for you. Therefore, it is safe to assume she is NOT considering your interest in this matter. That said, you need to be very convinced that Hauwa is the bone of your bone. You know why? You seemed to have ended multiple relationships prior to now on mama's request. Why you are really sticking to Hauwa, we do not know and you have to do that soul searching. As you have acknowledged, your mom is not going to listen to anyone (not even your dad which says a lot about her) so do not send anyone to her anymore. Telling people to engage her to accept your girl is making her feel more relevant in the scheme of things. BE very convinced that Hauwa is the one for you and sit your parents down. Tell them you appreciate their care and they have trained you well to become your own man. To that end, you want to start your family and you have found Hauwa the woman after your heart. Ask for your father's blessings and prayers. Now John after the marriage, you have a huge role to play. If you do not understand what it means to be the head of your home and defend your wife from your mom, just stick to your mom. If you are not bold enough to tell your mother off when she will start to frustrate Hauwa, don't bother. If you would not boldly tell your mother that whatever decision you take if for the benefit of your young home, just stick with her. You honestly know the kind of person your mother is so be prepared to have mental fights with her till you win. If all else fails, it is you and Hauwa against the world. She should mend the broken relationship with your dad so she can look to him for the emotional needs she is tasking you for. A piece to Hauwa: She knows the type of woman her MIL to be is. If your husband tells you to back off his family on your defence, it is not the time to claim Mrs. Two goody shoes and insist on been chumy gumy with them. Your MIL is a drama queen: don't feed it. Once she doesn't encroach on your personal space, ignore it. No time for 'she did not greet me back, she eyed me, she served me with left hand, she called me Hauwatu etc etc. Goodluck to you all. 31 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by PresidentAde(m): 9:11pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
***** **** *** ** * Your mum maybe Right & she may be wrong... you need serious wisdom to get through this... ... whatever happens, you need to remove your mum's firm grip on you, "women" mother's are naturally manipulative..... .. . you need to Up your game too, try to play her game, .. 1. Try to be manipulative yourself.... call her, talk to her normally, get her gifts, act normal.... if she raise that issue, stylishly change the topic, let her strive to know what you have in mind..... 2 . Try to go around her trusted friends & family, network with them ... let them "see you as a go to guy".... 3. Then you'll subtly start reporting your mum to this people, you'll complain abt different issues that is not related to your lady....... 4.. try the above in 3months, 4th month... start mounting pressure on her abt your lady through those links......... by the 6th month you should have her green light.... ...... ..... However, MAKE SURE, YOURE SURE ABT THIS LADY, PLS , DOUBLE CHECK DURING THESE MONTH of your mind game... .. #i hope I've been able to help, i wish you Godspeed 1 Like |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by johndan103: 9:30pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
PresidentAde: Thanks a lot. I appreciate your contribution |
Re: My Mom Rejects Every Woman I Introduce To Her by ctleurocollege: 10:53pm On Oct 02, 2019 |
How old is your mum? If your dad is late get her hooked |
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