twosquare:
crackhaus, please, tell us one or two. I want to learn. I'm afraid now sef...starting to have trust issues...not yet married though.

Ganjafama:
I get your point bro but somethings are better left unsaid. As it is now, it will take more than commitment for that marriage to remain the same. The dude is obviously pained that's why he's here. And he is going to feel pained anytime he his making love to is wife , inspite of the fact that he also cheated. It's the way men are wired.

harrikoko:
So my wife of 4 years and I decided to confess to each after things went a little sour in our marriage. She told me my friendly taunts that 'babe you're getting old oh, I am sure you aren't getting toasters again' led her to commit adultery. That she actually slept with her old crush who happens to be a lecturer in her former school last year. She told me she was going for a make-up job over the weekend last October, I even gave her money for transport and all. She still used my money to lodge herself and her married lecturer man friend in the hotel and got dicked. She said that was the first time and she regretted it. And that she stopped talking to the man right after the Bleep. I also told her I had a side chick for about 6 months and had a couple of flings with other girls but quit all after my side chick said she got pregnant and wanted to start blackmailing me. And I later discovered the pregnancy was 'audio' she only just wanted money.

We both felt sorry and forgave each other, but my big question now is, if she dated someone right under my nose and I didn't notice, and she perfectly did it. plus she's this church kinda wifey. Should I be worried? When she told me I almost fainted as I had always trusted her and could bet my life on it at any shrine she wouldn't do it.

harrikoko:

Like seriously I can't think straight again, anytime we are together all I think of is, how the man was striping my wife and she must have been reacting and if the Bleep was more explosive than we use to have

Breaststroke:


I don't understand it either. I have been on this earth long enough to know that - a man will hardly ever forgive your infidelity as a woman.

I am concerned for OP's wife and the continuity of their marriage. I don't want their marriage to end because they both came clean, but you can clearly see the OP is already struggling with her confession from his subsequent comments.

@ OP, whenever you start to feel funny please move forward with the knowledge that you were guilty of the same thing and even worse. Let that knowledge trump the mental images in your head.

harrikoko:

Like seriously I can't think straight again, anytime we are together all I think of is, how the man was striping my wife and she must have been reacting and if the Bleep was more explosive than we use to have

harrikoko:

Like seriously I can't think straight again, anytime we are together all I think of is, how the man was striping my wife and she must have been reacting and [s]if the Bleep was more explosive than we use to have[/s]

Breaststroke:


I like that you are trying, just keep doing that and remind yourself, you messed up too.

Don't let this break your marriage, it can actually make it stronger and better if you're both sincere and committed to a fresh start.

I wish you both quick healing, recovery and a better union.

crackhaus:
My only issue here is that you were surprised when she confessed to you.
As in, husbands still get surprised when they find out their wives have cheated on them once or twice before?

If only you know wetin we don use awa eyez see wey mouth no fit talk, you won't spend one second being worried about infidelity.

harrikoko:

Like seriously I can't think straight again, anytime we are together all I think of is, how the man was striping my wife and she must have been reacting and if the Bleep was more explosive than we use to have

thorpido:
Try to get it off your mind.Think about how you also goofed and how it could have hurt her more if she contracted a disease from you or another woman came with a baby.

Married men listen,WORDS are the most powerful things to a woman(ok maybe after money).Be careful how you say things that may start to affect self-esteem or security.Get wisdom!.Be careful how you say things about her body especially post baby bodies.You can see the length they go and the money a lot of women are spending on cosmetics and body augmentation nowadays.
It may not be the main reason your wife cheated but it played a big role.She needed that self-assurance.

You both have confessed to each other and forgiven.Start to revive your marriage again.Go on dates...spend quality time together.You say your wife is a good woman.Make your marriage work.

harrikoko:

I really am trying and this days we both try to make a joke out of our mistakes and then heal. God willing I will make it work because my woman remains the best even tho we both goofed

harrikoko:

Like seriously I can't think straight again, anytime we are together all I think of is, how the man was striping my wife and she must have been reacting and if the Bleep was more explosive than we use to have

crackhaus:

Lol.. brother, the most you can do is to get married to the best woman you can find, do your part well and leave the rest in the hands of whichever God you serve.
Just don't go about believing you are too perfect, or that the wife you married is too good to cheat on you...so If it does happen, your psychological & emotional cushion is already up to handle the distress.

Married women these days will cheat on their husbands using the most stupid excuse available - if you hear some of these excuses, even you will wonder if it's a gownup talking or a baby

AwkaetitiBabe:
He probably hung her leg through the burglary proof while hitting it

thesicilian:
You're worried about her infidelity when your own was much worse.

harrikoko:
So my wife of 4 years and I decided to confess to each after things went a little sour in our marriage. She told me my friendly taunts that 'babe you're getting old oh, I am sure you aren't getting toasters again' led her to commit adultery. That she actually slept with her old crush who happens to be a lecturer in her former school last year. She told me she was going for a make-up job over the weekend last October, I even gave her money for transport and all. She still used my money to lodge herself and her married lecturer man friend in the hotel and got dicked. She said that was the first time and she regretted it. And that she stopped talking to the man right after the Bleep.

I also told her I had a side chick for about 6 months and had a couple of flings with other girls but quit all after my side chick said she got pregnant and wanted to start blackmailing me. And I later discovered the pregnancy was 'audio' she only just wanted money.

We both felt sorry and forgave each other, but my big question now is, if she dated someone right under my nose and I didn't notice, and she perfectly did it. plus she's this church kinda wifey.

Should I be worried? When she told me I almost fainted as I had always trusted her and could bet my life on it at any shrine she wouldn't do it.

UjuJoan2:


I guess it's the same way women accept that 'all men cheat'. It's good that men are beginning to realise it goes both ways too. If a man can cheat, so can his wife.

I just pity men who think otherwise.

olabrinks:
I always say if you are cheating on your husband, please oh just take it to the grave or hide it very very well. There’s no amount of ranting or equality that can modify the nature of men. There’s nothing like if ‘I can forgive him why can’t he do the same’? The quicker you accept the realities of life, the easier life will be for you. They simply cannot handle a cheating gf/wife. They just can’t, no matter how much they try. That’s how many women have peace in their homes, they cheat and they cover it well. The only time you should confess is if children are involved.