There is only one idiot in the whole story and that is you my friend. Let's agree your babe trusted her friend and decided to help. You even claimed to be a randy type in the past. The truth was you enjoyed the toto to even have it more than once. Just few days my babe asked me to wait in her room while she was on her way with her roommate. I declined and waited outside for 2 hours standing instead...you know why? The Bible says; flee from sin...never believe you can handle...God was clear enough; Flee...please carry you nonsense away. I advice you not to go acting like a Saint and confess o...That's bullshit. You'll love her... It's that simple. The good thing is you're sober and confess to your God. Shikena!!!

kowema:
He said he Fell into her seduction!.
So now we should blame her?.

Oga man up and take responsibility for your shit!.

You didn't feel guilty all the while you guys had several rendezvous, it's when she left back to base that your guilt resumed work, Nonsense!!!!.

When she started the Art of seduction as you claimed, why didn't you tell your girlfriend?, Na when you don belleful nai your guilt trigger.

Abi you are feeling like a this cus the girl isn't the one feeling horrible, if she was, you would have been spreading ur shoulder, feeling like conqueror, would have gone back to ur babe and then typical she will forgive you and the other person becomes the villain.

Please go and confess to your loving girlfriend and I hope she dumps ur cheating ass. Seduced you indeed!

Dont mind him. Very Eleribu somborri

midnighter:
How can somebody use her own mouth to urge their dude and girlfriend stay together...in a self-contained...and she wont even be there to attend to her friend...

Well, couldnt be me sha..crazy..

Maybe she collaborated with the friend to test you and see if you would fall

Wow, you are so intelligent. If you dnt mind us been friends.

Guy man, forget that thing!

You only feel bad because you don't know if her friend will blackmail you tomorrow and you feel unsafe. If the friend was some other random girl, you'd still be shacking that ponmo!

Abeg leave matter jare!

God, pls help those of us that abi who are ready to stay faithful to our Ladies, no matter what.

Oga, u have to tell her. U might lose her buh u have to tell her.

AdeeT:


For days I've been so weak bro, I'm so out of thoughts. I really bleeped up, I know.

I actually kept my distance from her, the first day, she slept in the bedroom, while I in the living room. I fell to some cheap plays, and she cornered me. I'm seriously regretting my actions.

This is a girl that have been praying with me(and for me) before I sleep or go to work the next day. I shouldn't have do this to her. It seems that I can't live with the guilt, neither do I wanna loose her.

Her friend is already ignored, both off and on-line.

Write a letter of the deepest regret.
Tell her you're walking away in shame, that you're not worthy of her.
Tell her the steps you're taking to release her to a more deserving hypothetical man.
This is the only way to lose her with the minimum guilt.
Make no excuses.

She may think it hard and later grant you a second chance.
She never may.
But to keep it a secret is not a thing you can live with unless you become a reprobate.

borngeologist:
Just tell her it better to tell her the truth.. Last week my babe cheated on me.. She cried and told me how it happened.. I can't loose that girl because of just that single mistake. I forgave her and I even found out within myself that I love her than ever.. I can't leave that babe..

Lol.

See no evil, hear no evil

frozen70g:


Just promise yourself that you won't repeat such a dirty act next time, even although your marriage with her

Once you can do so then you will find peace

Love her more and more and your conscience will mellow down

As for her friend, reduce your communication with her and use your senses, she will accept a Bleep from you even if your wife is in pains in labour room and you are tensed, she no send and not remorse from her so best option is distance before she break your home a d take over

She no send ohhh

Don't tell your wife because you will create a very deep hole like a pot In her heart and women don't forget such

After your marriage just tell her politely that you don't want what will lead you to have problems with her that she should drop all her girl friends and start making friends with responsible married women

and you believe with all your heart, you have said the right thing? Especially those last lines, you'll just tell someone to leave their friends because they married you and they must obey, friends they might have even known before they met you? Why sounding like every thing is predictable. Friend might be plotting something, breaking trust two times by keeping quiet, when it backfires eh!

I have read so many comments, but this is my ½cent.

The same set of people that blame a man for raising his hand on a woman and not blaming the woman for creating such a situation or for not running away are still the same set of people that will blame a man for falling into seduction and as well not blame the woman for seducing the man. I have always maintained that it is a woman's world.

There is nothing actually wrong with accommodating your fiancée's friend even if it is a self contained room, a bedroom flat is even big enough to contain both of you, those of you saying it was a bad idea for his fiancée to allow her friend come over are basically rotten-minded. It was not a bad idea OP but sometimes things happen unexpectedly like this one, you have to accept it and move on.

The obvious thing here is that OP feels bad for sleeping with his fiancée's friend, if it was any other random girl, I know he wouldn't feel this bad, and I know OP is afraid that his fiancée would find out sooner or later.

The point is this, try to talk to her not because you cheated but because you cheated with her close friend. There is also a chance that u were set up, this particular one is very dangerous, it could as well be that her friend wants to deal with her, the mind of a woman is a deep ocean. You can tell her this below...

"I have been wanting to tell you something but I don't want the thing to affect your relationship with the person in question, if this be the only wish you can ever grant me, then let the person never know about this and let it not bring a rift between you two. (If she agrees to this condition, then go ahead, if not, abort it, I maintain, abort it, it is not like she must abide by this, but it is a card that you have on her) I messed up with (her name) but it was in no way her fault, I cant ask you to forgive me because I know it would be hard but at least do not have anything against her, I am to be blamed because I lost my control"
(Never go into details, it is more than enough to tell her you slept with her, telling her events leading to the stuff will only exasperate her more, please avoid it, at least for now)

OP tell her this, don't be afraid of losing her, you won't lose her, but if you later do because of this, at least you will have a clear mind and you will know that she was most likely looking for a means to go, don't forget, for some girls, they will be using this against for the rest of the relationship but let it not bother you, there is nothing like peace of mind.

On the other hand, if you are someone like me, if we are not married, I owe the person no fidelity, I would act like nothing happened and any day she pops up the question, I will answer yes and act like it was no big deal and of course it isn't.

Someone who would stay would always find reasons to stay, and the person who would go would always find reasons to go.

Lastly, OP, you are not arrogant!

Just tell her before her friend will tell o, if not she will say you are hiding things from her and the trust won't be there.

Chriswazo:


This man,
Kai
Always mixing venom with wisdom and hilarity, Kai, lol

Oga, no be beta advice........

Donjazzy12:

My dear don't kill yourself! Now let me shock you. Your supposed innocent girlfriend is a lesbian or should I say a bisexual. Her girlfriend is her lesbian partner and they have been worried how to break this to you. So she sends her to seduce you all in the guise of staying with you to reduce hotel bills!
What to do? Just play along. Pretend like nothing happened. Very soon their intentions will be very clear. She will want you both to have a party eventually.
Now most young girls of nowadays are lesbians but they pretend a lot. They only date guys because of societal pressure. Any day Nigeria legalizes homosexual marriage you will see Genevieve Nnaji, Linda Ikeji, Euchariah Anunobi, etc rush to get marriage certificates for their lesbian partners! For now they hide behind ridiculous excuses!

Yeah, back to you. How did I know this? It happened to my Cousin!

So ur cousin is now the standard for the world. That's some grave accusations against these names you've mentioned. Wetin Obi no go see for wharf! Your opinion is such a ridiculous brain twister.

donbachi:
Sounded very arrogant.

Is there a different meaning to "arrogant" that I don't know of?

True. It was a test dis dude failed woefully.

midnighter:
How can somebody use her own mouth to urge their dude and girlfriend stay together...in a self-contained...and she wont even be there to attend to her friend...

Well, couldnt be me sha..crazy..

Maybe she collaborated with the friend to test you and see if you would fall

Oh why

yeyeosoronga:


Never say never. Abuja is a very expensive city. Going there briefly for a job interview from Lagos. Costs:- 1. transport to and fro (might be over 15K or 60K depending if you go by air or road) 2. Hotel per night depending on how long you stay will be more than 5K per night and let's assume your interview is 2-3 days, that'll be another 10-15K). Making it a total of 25K to 80K. I'm being very conservative here.
Imagine that amount from the pocket of a jobless person or one who earns 30K per month on a trip of 2-3 days where you're not even sure of getting the job or being successful at the interview.
Such a person will want to save costs as much as possible, and that might include sharing a room with her friend's boyfriend. Her friend probably understand the financial constraints hence agreed to speak to her bf.

Hmm! And after all that wahala she still went ahead and rode him like a bike (If we believe the story as OP has told it)

It is well oh

I can't just resist the urge to accuse, abuse and blame you, Lemme apply restraint!
Buh Guy no matter how anybody would wants to see it THE confession thing is the only sure way to free your already entangled soul, and to make the girl trust a again tell her urself one on one bcoz it's only a truely repentant soul that confesses his wrong doings.
But don't be a coward by telling her it's her friend that seduced you ooo,
Just man up and take the blame for not controlling your urge.

Cutehector:
Hi Mercy

how have u been?

torqque7:


Hmm my honest advice is get her pregnant fast if you love her enough to marry her,and once the pregnancy don enter like 3months that cant be aborted again then confess to her what you did..there still is a high chance she might still leave you but its better to have that as your insurance than to go confess without a plan be cos the truth is there is an 80% chance she will leave you if you confess now,and if by some miracle she stays then bro the relationship will never be the same again cos she will also cheat on you soon..

Im talking from experience my gf cheated on me and i found out and ever since then,i cheat at the slightest opportunity i get. She tried commiting suicide when i wanted to leave and threathened to go and find a way to do jazz for me then kill herself so the jazz will not be able to be undone lol..complicated issue but i have it under control now and very soon il leave when the time is right,but for now she thinks all is well but i cheat like crazy lol.

Funny thing is once i start trying to distant myself or we have a fight she just falls sick and stops eating and looses weight..life can be funny how u can love someone so much and yet still somehow cheat on that person..well i was going to marry her cos i really loved her and i even disvirgined her but the damage in our relationship from her cheating cant be undone,i have forgiven her but can never look at her the same way again and cannever marry her again.

Please Marry her. Send me an invitation and I'll sponsor with something substantial.

mirexxx:
how have u been?

i've been doing well, how about you? Where do you base now

You are only sorry because you gave your cheating secret out to someone that knows your fiancée. Just 2days after the friends visit you already cheated. That shows that you are doing a lot of cheating behind her back in Abuja. This particular one hook you for throat because, you know that it can easily come out. You can also be easily blackmailed by this other woman at any point during preparations for the wedding or during the marriage. Anyway, goodluck to you! I hope she understands.

seuncyrus:


some people love and trust completely with their whole hearts . The op's finacee might be one of those , she trusts her friend and bf completely , so she couldn't have had it in mind that her bf can sleep with her bestfriend

Well, the world isn't as nice as all that. She has to open her eyes because not everybody is as lovely as she is

Tell her before she finds out which would be more disastrous...Make sure you have made her happy in all ramifications that same day.Provide whatever she likes..Then knee down and confess.....Go for a thorough medical check up also whether you did it with or without protection before the confession...
Proceed with the marriage rites immediately...

She should distance herself with 1000km spoon from that LUCIFER friend...She can kill..Is as bad as that...

Lionpikin:
the thing no tire me? she travelled for some days, on the second day she called and told me her best friend would be spending some time with me that she just got a job on the island bla bla bla.....maybe she wanted the babe to be monitoring me, I didn't even argue, I just told her if the girl first you carry belle for me or she send you IV for our wedding, no vex o.....na she use her mouth tell the girl make she no near my house.....there is a saying that you can't ask a goat to look after your yam without the goat eating it....I would rather not be in such situation than fighting the temptation....as per the op, he had been eyeing the girl hence the reason for agreeing to the request and falling immediately, but him no come get the mind to handle the guilt....he is a weakling if you ask me.....he presents himself as a good boy, such guys usually have relationships problems .... something as easy as this, he cannot solve

Lol you were being realistic while OP was trying to be a nice guy but ended up burning himself

Sanchezmillz:


What you have said is totally different,u left the house for the guy.How will you talk about trust in a one bedroom apartment for christ sake.Please explain. Even when Jesus was tempted, it was not as bad as this one.Morally speaking if this story is true,then his gf should be planked with a stick.Did her friend complain that she dint have money for hotel?

Plz his gal friend doesn't need to be spanked, what she's done is what I can actually do but the problem,personal me I just have and believe that guys must always make a move so to avoid it I left my 1bedroom flat for him,because I love my bestie and wouldn't want anything to hurt her.the gal friend did that base on trust,i just wanna believe that.

Brightgem:
So ur cousin is now the standard for the world. That's some grave accusations against these names you've mentioned. Wetin Obi no go see for wharf! Your opinion is such a ridiculous brain twister.

Be quiet! You know it is the truth! Lesbians a very where!

Chinny024:
Tell her before she finds out which would be more disastrous...Make sure you have made her happy in all ramifications that same day.Provide whatever she likes..Then knee down and confess.....Go for a thorough medical check up also whether you did it with or without protection before the confession...
Proceed with the marriage rites immediately...

She should distance herself with 1000km spoon from that LUCIFER friend...She can kill..Is as bad as that...

Op do no such thing! She doesn't need to know! Most girls are lesbians and yet they hide it from their boyfriends. Be smart like women. Smoke at her but never ever make the mistake of telling her.

Nobody is as dubious as women. Learn to be smart!

midnighter:
How can somebody use her own mouth to urge their dude and girlfriend stay together...in a self-contained...and she wont even be there to attend to her friend...

Well, couldnt be me sha..crazy..

Maybe she collaborated with the friend to test you and see if you would fall

point!!!..aki.u.are.right

no remorse or regret here, the poster did this post just to let people think of him as a sharp guy. given the chance with another girl, he would do it over and over again

op somethings are better left unsaid .when it comes to sex trust nobody the earlier you accept this bitter truth the better for you .Even your fiancée if they play her cassette for you you go tire

@AdeeT The question you should ask your self is that will you still have sex with her when you are in that same situation

then your conscience will tell you the truth and set you free