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I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating - Romance (3) - Nairaland

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Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by daviddelly(m): 11:44pm On Dec 02, 2019
after getting married to an ambitious man ,later he will more obsessed about his ambition without giving u love or being there for d kids when u need him ,u will also be d one to open a new account to complain.most guys are poor today because of how the society (Nigeria)is,everyman or guy has an ambition.just hope for a man who will always be dia for u money is not everything true love is.

21 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 11:45pm On Dec 02, 2019
DanDeeBoss:
You've set high standards for yourself.... it's good though, Maybe you should be a Lil patient, you might meet one who fits in...


BTW Try those highbrow areas as you were advised

so men living in highbrow areas dont hurt women, they dont chop and run..lol

24 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 11:48pm On Dec 02, 2019
Lightway:
Look at this...

When I was in the Univeristy i set a high standard for myself.. i didnt look at broke girls twice and I could only date girls with 100k in their account.... I look out for the rich people and associate them.

Here is your problem

You didnt really specify the specs you want...

Define an ambitious man.

Should he have a million dollars in his account or 1 million?

Should he have a car or cars?

Should he be black or white?

Will you accept a man with a tattos?


You only gave these descriptions

He should be well spoken, either with a career or into trade, accomplished, way older by at least 10 yrs

There are many men with these features, so you need to be very specific.

When you narrow down the characteristics that interest you, ask yourself one question...

Where can you find this kind of man? On the street? By the road? In the highbrows of lekki, like you said Or on social media?

If you cant find him, then ask yourself...

Does this man really exist?

Sometimes we watch too many movies, listen to too many social media talks, consume too many relationship books and shows and all that garbage push us to fantasize and create a partner (man) that doesn't exist...

Just look at your man, you want him to have all the great features just the same way a lot of people want all the bad in the world to be gone..

In reality, the world is so bad that some people dont want to live in it anymore and they commit suicide.

But there are great people out there doing good, with a good heart and a giving spirit. You have seen them and you probably envy them. Unknown to you, many of these people already know the truth, they have studied the bad in this world and learned how to live with it... So while they do good, no one can cheat them or outwit them because they know whats up.

So while your man must has good, impressive features he must have bad features too. And while you're fantasizing about the perfect man for you, remember that no one is perfect and there is no perfect man. In fact, you might find out that no man has all the qualities you want. Instead, they have most, a few or none of these attributes. The right thing to do would be to give those with most of these features you want a chance and learn from there.

Try to learn lessons while you're younger, because they'll sharpen your decision making skills when you get older.

I learned this while chasing after the right partner while I was making 200k per month and hunting only ambitious ladies. So, the feeling is mutual

Harlequeen

sorry to bother you, did you ever find the ambitious lady?
Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 11:49pm On Dec 02, 2019
Beosten:


Good advice!

Marital destiny is a very dangerous water to maneuver. Op is not a religious type, and if she's to rely on her head, she needs to be very careful.

so how many religious single women in their 30s are married now?

they go to church everyday, worship christ like no man business but are still single even in their 40s.

1 Like

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by EmptyCoconutHead(m): 11:49pm On Dec 02, 2019
midnighter:
Lol a girl gats to console herself :
Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by EmptyCoconutHead(m): 11:51pm On Dec 02, 2019
midnighter:

[s]
Lol. She does sound like me doesn't she cheesy

OP yes, you're doing the right thing, just continue like that you will be fine.

It sounds like you just need a change of scenery, you sound fatigued and slightly exasperated. Maybe you need to try out a new hobby and expand your horizons so that your mind won't be on it all the time

You will feel better when you start serving and you get to try out a new environment. Also try to give people a fair chance, attraction doesn't have to be immediate [/s]
Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 11:54pm On Dec 02, 2019
...some are in the army(i can't date men in the armed forces)...





Good luck. sad undecided

1 Like

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 11:56pm On Dec 02, 2019
Apination:
The simple things in life are usually what gives lasting happiness. You are setting the wrong standards for yourself, what if your Mr accomplished becomes the opposite tomorrow, would he automatically become unattractive? Life is not a Zee world telenovela, wake up and face the reality, there are no made men according to anyone's fantasy anywhere undecided
leave am, na me she go marry at last, if she care to know! I'm Mr No good advice.

1 Like

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 11:58pm On Dec 02, 2019
the op is looking for a rich, matured and ready made man for marriage, he must be living in an highbrow area, age bracket(35-40)

all her spec are in the writeup but many of you cant noticed that

40 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by noCAP(m): 12:22am On Dec 03, 2019
This must be funmitasticqueen, abi wetin be her moniker sef?

1 Like

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by maya007: 12:45am On Dec 03, 2019
We all had these dos n dont pros and cons...n that's how we remained single ooo cause of our high taste n choices n before we knew it time had gone,n we were now settling for less n looking up to God if we had known to always remind ourselves no one is perfect n we dont always get wat we want mayb things would have been different...little advice dont waste time waiting for the perfect detailed man make ur self perfect work on urself n watch d right person come for you ....you attract who you are!

13 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Cutehector(m): 12:56am On Dec 03, 2019
Clout chaser.

1 Like

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by pryme(m): 12:59am On Dec 03, 2019
Harlequeen:
Yes i am. I am feminine, soft, good company, intelligent, just starting out my career, well read and so much more. The man who i end up with will be truly blessed.

These are the kind of women am worried about,
Those that think they are perfect.

In other words you will be doing the man a favor by being in his life.
That's a red flag with bright colors.

56 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by pryme(m): 1:03am On Dec 03, 2019
Ladylite:



Aunti
Aunty

Calm down, go and enjoy your life.

You may not believe in religion now but I bet you when you are 35 you will know life is spiritual.


All this you explained here are normal for teenagers and under 25 girls.

Lady to Lady I tell you that you know even if you meet a mature guy with all that standard, he may not be interested in you and you are too proud to chase or beg.


See, you are not ready so move on and have fun with your life and other areas of your life.

IN your 30s try again by then the standards you spent so much time explaining now will not seem important to you.

Ciao

You deserve fresh fish for this post.

12 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Squirrel01: 1:12am On Dec 03, 2019
GraGra247:


Stick with this no matter what and you will not miss it. Even if you miss it, it would be because you were not lucky and not because you didn't do what you were supposed to do.

I agree with your dad. Focus on building up your career, CV and Qualications and skills. Go from masters to PHD if you can.

All these come with huge bonuses:- Career men and "oil company" men will be competing for your attention. They'll be hunting you and not the reverse.

Tell her the truth. Stop deceiving her.

9 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by zed7: 1:14am On Dec 03, 2019
Harlequeen:
Yes i am. I am feminine, soft, good company, intelligent, just starting out my career, well read and so much more. The man who i end up with will be truly blessed.
Actually, there is a thin line between high self esteem and narcissism. Whilst we think we are the best thing to sliced bread, others may just see us as shíít and avoid us. Learn to be a bit humble, respect all irrespective of whether he is your spec or not.

My elder sister worked in a multinational, was doing good, pretty and all but kept looking for the right man like you. She was very friendly with this semi educated guy who admired her so much. One day he told his cousin about her. He introduced them and he ended up being her dream guy. Even 'fuckboys 'have their purpose.

Do not drop your standards but also realize that sometimes what is good for us is not always what we think is good for us. You are young, don't put pressure on yourself. Just enjoy the company of guys casually. To be honest, I can boldly say you don't understand men yet.

A question to ask is, the people we want, do they want us in return? The best gifts sometimes come in unattractive packages. Stay safe.

51 Likes 4 Shares

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Squirrel01: 1:16am On Dec 03, 2019
Ladylite:



Aunti
Aunty

Calm down, go and enjoy your life.

You may not believe in religion now but I bet you when you are 35 you will know life is spiritual.


All this you explained here are normal for teenagers and under 25 girls.

Lady to Lady I tell you that you know even if you meet a mature guy with all that standard, he may not be interested in you and you are too proud to chase or beg.


See, you are not ready so move on and have fun with your life and other areas of your life.

IN your 30s try again by then the standards you spent so much time explaining now will not seem important to you.

Ciao

Lol

1 Like

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Squirrel01: 1:28am On Dec 03, 2019
lilwetdick:
the op is looking for a rich, matured and ready made man for marriage, he must be living in an highbrow area, age bracket(35-40)

all her spec are in the writeup but many of you cant noticed that

Na her format. Updated cv

6 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by totosucker(m): 1:36am On Dec 03, 2019
Harlequeen:
Yes i am. I am feminine, soft, good company, intelligent, just starting out my career, well read and so much more. The man who i end up with will be truly blessed.
Bullshit. No established man will fall for this crap. Work on becoming the kind of lady that an established man will love.

13 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by rex444(m): 2:38am On Dec 03, 2019
very touching but my two piece advise is, live a life ...... have fun if U can , depending on what your idea of fun is- embrace it... you mustn't be in a sexual relationship...meet men ,meet boys ,explore but while at it ,use your head ....at the right moment if ever there is, something good might happen but also prepare for the unexpected too....that's life ....

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 2:54am On Dec 03, 2019
hmm your case is kinder complex oo cheesy.ok i understand when u said u dont like fukboys or men who are not ambitious but u would like a man with a steady career and who is focused but again u dont want to date a doctor or a soldier cheesy.is a doctor or soldier not one with a steady career? cheesy.anyway all i can say is the type of men u like try and go to those places they hang out and also dress well and look good(i didnt say u should dress like ashawo oo).sooner or later they will pick u.and u did say u would like to date a guy who who is focused in traveling out of the country or has traveled out.As a lady u more in a bigger advantage than we guys to hook up with a partner who is based overseas.all u need do is have friends or family members who might link u up with such men overseas looking for good homebased girls or u can use the internet but then be wary of scammers.a friend of my aunty her first dauther was lucky to hook up with a naija guy based in the uk.though the man is a divorcee and a little advanced in age(look like his late 50s or so) but then he looked cool.the girl finished from federal poly auchi with no boyfriend or fiancee so she was linked to this guy who was looking for a homebased wife.she is now married to the man and in the uk now.u can hook up on facebook and search for abroad based naija guys who are interested in homebase naija girls and with luck u could meet ur prince charming who would come to naija to pick u up and join him overseas.keep on searching and dont give up.

1 Like

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 3:01am On Dec 03, 2019
Skmoda360:
I think you should drop your guard a little but to be sincere....I'm not in a position to advise you....lefulefu, ubunja, and co come and give her refreshing advise.....Sire!!!!! undecided
i cant understand why a girl in nigeria will be saying she is finding it hard to get a partner grin.nigeria wey men dey search upandan for wives cheesy.if na abroad i can understand cos for yankee and jardon most guys dere no dey too send woman dat much d way we naija guys do and many of them arnt all dat suck for marriage hence many of their ladies are very lonely. but in naija ehn men dont give women breathing spaces so its kinder surprising when i see a lady in nigerian complaining that she cant get a man cheesy.

15 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Nobody: 3:04am On Dec 03, 2019
You are lookin for who will take good care of u abroad. U are just a mad gold digger. angry

11 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Lonelypacifist6: 5:49am On Dec 03, 2019
Are you truthful and to yourself? Answer this question first?
Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by MedicH: 6:02am On Dec 03, 2019
May i know why you don't want doctors?
Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by blinkz4real: 6:24am On Dec 03, 2019
Find a Bible believing church and serve God and the interest of his Kingdom! In no time you will find peace and the God ordained man will locate you and wen he comes u ll no its what u desire.

9 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by healthserve(m): 6:31am On Dec 03, 2019
Harlequeen:
thanks, but everyone marries for a selfish reason, and there is nothing wrong with that


Tryst me not everyone marries for selfish reasons. In fact, many marry for peace and fulfillment even in today's evil days

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by partnerbizn4(m): 6:31am On Dec 03, 2019
Beosten:
What you have to understand is that if you see someone with these credentials, he must have used and dumped a lot of women before you met him. I grew up with a very poor grandfather, and still, I had two girls who were ready to be mine right from secondary school days. Another two women in the university fought each other to a standstill just to have me because they thought I have good future. I married none of the four. I spent 80% of salary from my first big job on a girl by paying her school fees. She ended up leaving me. I married someone who didn't collect Kobo from me before marriage, and I had no job when I married her. Today, I have 3 sources of income.

My advice for you is that you should drop this mentality of listing credentials upandan. If you can, believe God to help in this aspect; not by becoming a church goer, but by chasing righteousness.

Really?

Could you elaborate more on that girl that you paid her fees?

Why did she leave?

And would you pay a girl's fees now if you could turn back the hands of time.
Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by partnerbizn4(m): 6:37am On Dec 03, 2019
Ladylite:



Aunti
Aunty

Calm down, go and enjoy your life.

You may not believe in religion now but I bet you when you are 35 you will know life is spiritual.


All this you explained here are normal for teenagers and under 25 girls.

Lady to Lady I tell you that you know even if you meet a mature guy with all that standard, he may not be interested in you and you are too proud to chase or beg.


See, you are not ready so move on and have fun with your life and other areas of your life.

IN your 30s try again by then the standards you spent so much time explaining now will not seem important to you.

Ciao

Please tell, how is life spiritual?
Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by SouthSouth1914: 6:44am On Dec 03, 2019
No man will have access to my vagina and womb without investment and commitment. Eventually it becomes hard to keep up communication and we just fizzle out like that.

I am sorry to say, maybe you were once an undercover call girl. You need to realize men do not owe women anything, same way you have your standards!

I think you are just being addressed the way you carry yourself- A call girl.

PS: Any insult therein is non intentional and hope you don’t take offense!

4 Likes

Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Harlequeen: 6:49am On Dec 03, 2019
dancok:
sorry to bother you, did you ever find the ambitious lady?
i never said i was looking for an ambitious lady
Re: I Don't Know What My Problem Is With Men And Dating by Harlequeen: 6:51am On Dec 03, 2019
Lonelypacifist6:
Are you truthful and to yourself? Answer this question first?
i try to be. It's a very tough thing to do.

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