Why did you not walk out of the house and sleep in a hotel or your car? 2AM is an irresponsible time to be outside. I have a wife too and would never behave that way to her. And to top the whole thing, you give her backhand smash! Guy, she knows and even I know that this is the beginning of more beatings. She just needs to clear the mum from your system. That's why she left.

She will return. But, you need deliverance from anger and read books. You don bleeped up, you know that right?

Update: My madam provoke me today. Na drive I drive outside my neighborhood. I just got back inside to meet her smiling sheepishly. Me sef I burst laugh. That is love . Marriage can be like that sometimes.

Op.. don't beg her again.. Else she will always involve her family to any little trouble.

Your wife no ready for marriage before ?if she wan go ,make she go

OP just like most men, you are wicked. That’s how you people start with one slap and end up killing someone’s daughter in the name of marriage, nonsense.

freecocoahubby:
She was yelling me ,throwing hands and screaming at me . I ignored her and left the room to the living room but she followed me and I asked her to leave me alone but she kept going


Haba, you're a human being nau - the bolded shows provocation on her part and she clearly threw hands first!

OP, your wife deserved that slap tbh and I think you've begged her enough. Let her go if she wants..

The guy messed up jare....from ur bolded it means that the guy never showed remorse for coming late....why will u come that late and all u could do was to snub or ignore her. a little caressing and I'm sorry would have settled the case not a slap..

The timing of the apology was very wrong.... U would have apologized not slap instead u slapped then apologized.... Meaning slapping ur wife is seen as wrong but coming come by 2am is not wrong Abi??

Anyways the lady went too far to settle the case involving a third party.

slap is normal in marriage

AdedoyinO:

God

God bless you my sister. That's how it starts. Beatings today, flowers tomorrow; kick today, shoes and bags tomorrow. Na so e go continue till dem beat am enter grave.

I have a strong feeling this story is not complete. As you men will say, we have not heard her own side of the story. There's more to the issue.

Doyin this one you looking for all the side of or to the story so, the weather is not so friendly o. the heat might end up turning everywhere into bakery oven o.
just one side of the story is enough to tell us the whole story, women could be but a man that can't keep his cool is worse.
but the woman got it wrong inviting her family members. the mother and brother don't mean her well, she should have informed her husband family first before involving hers.
it's been as long while, how is your family (particularly the young one) doing? á tí máa claim title o.

freecocoahubby:
She was yelling me ,throwing hands and screaming at me . I ignored her and left the room to the living room but she followed me and I asked her to leave me alone but she kept going


Haba, you're a human being nau - the bolded shows provocation on her part and she clearly threw hands first!

OP, your wife deserved that slap tbh and I think you've begged her enough. Let her go if she wants..

Who is this one now? How can you be my hubby? Woman beater like you?

Emmanuelhector:
slap is normal in marriage

just look at.

Ekene161829:
I did something I really regret. My wife and I have an amazing marriage, 2 years of marriage and we are blessed with a 7-month-old baby girl.

She is 28 and I almost 33. Last Saturday I got invited to go out by some of my work friends , I got home late 2am, so madam wasn't happy. She was yelling at me, throwing hands and screaming at me. I ignored her and left the room to the living room but she followed me and I asked her to leave me alone but she kept going which made me angry.

I took the back of my hand and gave her a slap on the mouth. She cried out and held her face and started crying and her lips was bleeding. I didn't intentionally hurt her, I just wanted to calm her down since ignoring her was not working. I said sorry, and I was literally on my knees begging her. I tried to hold her but she refused.
The rest of the night was me repeating apology or i didn't mean to hurt you. She ignored me . She went into our room and locked the door.

She was in there for a long time and the next morning, her mother and older brother was at the house and she came out of the room with her and our baby stuff and she said she was leaving me for good. I told her how sorry I was but her mother told me to get out of their faces and they left the house.

I feel so ashamed and I've never done anything like this before and I never thought I would. I don't want to loose my wife and baby. I need both of them back. Should I attempt to contact her?

What do I do?

Op,you erred by hitting her and I hope it's not a habitual thing.I understand how it is sha,I'm married I know how women and their wahala,she comes at you with her mouth you leave d room for the parlor, she comes there and continues haranguing you,you leave the parlor and go to the room,she comes back to the room.It can make even the Pope get mad and do what he won't ordinarily do.
That said,thank God you apologized immediately and profusely.
Her bringing her mother and sibling is A NO NO.
Its terrible.
Pls,I BEG YOU IN GOD'S NAME,DON'T BEG HER AGAIN,at least for now, otherwise you are setting yourself up for suppression in your own house where she will determine when you go out or not.
IT IS WITHIN YOUR RIGHTS TO GO OUT and come in late ONCE IN A WHILE,it is perfectly normal.
It is also her own right to hang out alone or with you once in a while but should come in earlier cos women are more vulnerable to being robbed etc.
In d end,I'm just giving advice,do your mind

freecocoa:
just look at.

Yes, my wife once slapped me when I bleeped up and my friends were watching.. and I once slapped her on issue like this.. and we are living good and understands eachother

Just tell her to slap YOU back and if she diagree my broda, use your teeth to count your tongue.

dokyOloye:

Op,you erred by hitting her and I hope it's not a habitual thing.I understand how it is sha,I'm married I know how women and their wahala,she comes at you with her mouth you leave d room for the parlor, she comes there and continues haranguing you,you leave the parlor and go to the room,she comes back to the room.It can make even the Pope get mad and do what he won't ordinarily do.
That said,thank God you apologized immediately and profusely.
Her bringing her mother and sibling is A NO NO.
Its terrible.
Pls,I BEG YOU IN GOD'S NAME,DON'T BEG HER AGAIN,at least for now, otherwise you are setting yourself up for suppression in your own house where she will determine when you go out or not.
IT IS WITHIN YOUR RIGHTS TO GO OUT and come in late ONCE IN A WHILE,it is perfectly normal.
It is also her own right to hang out alone or with you once in a while but should come in earlier cos women are more vulnerable to being robbed etc.
In d end,I'm just giving advice,do your mind

Man

Emmanuelhector:

Yes, my wife once slapped me when I bleeped up and my friends were watching.. and I once slapped her on issue like this.. and we are living good and understands eachother

My brother, I can assure you that’s not normal at all. You think you are living fine and one day a slap will graduate to a punch, from punch to using weapons. I know sometimes it’s so hard to hold back when angry but I guarantee you, if one is able to walk away or keep mute while the other talks or even screams, a lot of damage will be avoided, so please, don’t see hitting each other as normal, it is so not.

But na wa for your wife o, slapping you in presence of your friends, that’s just wrong. You people should not slap each other again biko, we don’t want anymore of such stories, we have tired.

JubrinElSudan:
You left her in the bedroom went to the Parlor and she still followed you to there. After you had slapped her, she now went back to the bedroom, locked the door and refused to come out. The same room she refused staying before she was slapped. Most times, na we dey cause trouble for ourselves

Truth is she wanted to push the Op to the wall. I guess she is a dramatist. Op, I want you to know that no matter how little the respect you had in the marriage before that incident, it is gone finally now. You can still get your dignity back, but you need to discipline yourself from calling her back. She wanted drama and she got it. Begging her will continue the drama. End the drama streak on your part. When she is in her right senses, she might come back, if not, have an arrangement for taking care of your kid. I know a lot of ladies will not agree with that, but hassling him for coming late isn't the best approach to solutions. What happened to waiting til the next morning. She hassling him doesn't reverse the act.

What is wrong with men of this generation,she wants to go let her go,women plenty,collect you pikin.she shouting on you is called emotional and psycological abuse.and if she can pack out over any little issue the she go soo pack out again.lock up tell her to file in the papers quick.no apologieses there.

Ekene161829:
I did something I really regret. My wife and I have an amazing marriage, 2 years of marriage and we are blessed with a 7-month-old baby girl.

She is 28 and I almost 33. Last Saturday I got invited to go out by some of my work friends , I got home late 2am, so madam wasn't happy. She was yelling at me, throwing hands and screaming at me. I ignored her and left the room to the living room but she followed me and I asked her to leave me alone but she kept going which made me angry.

I took the back of my hand and gave her a slap on the mouth. She cried out and held her face and started crying and her lips was bleeding. I didn't intentionally hurt her, I just wanted to calm her down since ignoring her was not working. I said sorry, and I was literally on my knees begging her. I tried to hold her but she refused.
The rest of the night was me repeating apology or i didn't mean to hurt you. She ignored me . She went into our room and locked the door.

She was in there for a long time and the next morning, her mother and older brother was at the house and she came out of the room with her and our baby stuff and she said she was leaving me for good. I told her how sorry I was but her mother told me to get out of their faces and they left the house.

I feel so ashamed and I've never done anything like this before and I never thought I would. I don't want to loose my wife and baby. I need both of them back. Should I attempt to contact her?

What do I do?

Guy,10 bottles for you

Dayg88:


Truth is she wanted to push the Op to the wall. I guess she is a dramatist. Op, I want you to know that no matter how little the respect you had in the marriage before that incident, it is gone finally now. You can still get your dignity back, but you need to discipline yourself from calling her back. She wanted drama and she got it. Begging her will continue the drama. End the drama streak on your part. When she is in her right senses, she might come back, if not, have an arrangement for taking care of your kid. I know a lot of ladies will not agree with that, but hassling him for coming late isn't the best approach to solutions. What happened to waiting til the next morning. She hassling him doesn't reverse the act.

Though I don't support wife beating, third party interference, especially from in laws, is a bane of matrimonial bliss. Good luck as you make efforts to recover your wife back

Ekene161829:
I did something I really regret. My wife and I have an amazing marriage, 2 years of marriage and we are blessed with a 7-month-old baby girl.

She is 28 and I almost 33. Last Saturday I got invited to go out by some of my work friends , I got home late 2am, so madam wasn't happy. She was yelling at me, throwing hands and screaming at me. I ignored her and left the room to the living room but she followed me and I asked her to leave me alone but she kept going which made me angry.

I took the back of my hand and gave her a slap on the mouth. She cried out and held her face and started crying and her lips was bleeding. I didn't intentionally hurt her, I just wanted to calm her down since ignoring her was not working. I said sorry, and I was literally on my knees begging her. I tried to hold her but she refused.
The rest of the night was me repeating apology or i didn't mean to hurt you. She ignored me . She went into our room and locked the door.

She was in there for a long time and the next morning, her mother and older brother was at the house and she came out of the room with her and our baby stuff and she said she was leaving me for good. I told her how sorry I was but her mother told me to get out of their faces and they left the house.

I feel so ashamed and I've never done anything like this before and I never thought I would. I don't want to loose my wife and baby. I need both of them back. Should I attempt to contact her?

What do I do?

Rubbish......

Only brain dead family will follow their son to this kind yeye waka. He paid her pride price, and never will a reasonable man goes to his wife house for any marital settlement.

fatymore:
Don't take the advice of people telling you to ignore her.

Talk to your parent and let them follow you to her place to beg for forgiveness.

As for me, you will write an undertaken that you won't ever lift your hands on me again.

CHoccolaTE:
Op is not telling the full story
I want to hear the wife's side of the story too
Maybe op did more than slap, maybe he added a few blows or few derogatory words but unfortunately the wife is not here to tell her side of everything.
Maybe their marriage has been rocky for years now or maybe he has hit her before, who knows?

In any case, contact her with written and signed agreement the you will never assault her and if you do you will be arrested, that should be in the contract.

I am sure that one will be enough to convince her of your remorse

Bye

Will the wife also write an agreement she will never harangue him with her mouth again?
You know how maddening it can be when a woman is dissecting you with her mouth and following you everywhere even when you leave the each place for her?

Why are we not talking about the fact that his in-laws just came and took his wife just like dat. Look bros u are a gud man. I would advise u to let her be for some time don't call or text for the next three weeks I promise you the same mother inlaw and brother in-law will call u to say so u can not come and apologize, tell Dem to return her the way they came and took her away, don't get me wrong I no u love ur wife but u have to use the mind game on Dem dey no u love her and are already anticipating ur next move of coming with ur pipo and d rest give them d wrong move, ignore their move ur wife will call and apologize then u can give her ur rules, my wife knows I don't involve my parents in my family wahala so she will never try it. If this move no work after one month call ur elders make Dem go beg simple.

My brother, let put religion and tribe aside, the wife action is unacceptable in any region.

Dupalmer:

She can't. I payed her bride price she didn't pay mine. Southerners are lucky to have Christianity dominating thus the ladies have Christian husband's. Would she react the same way if she was married to a Muslim especially northern moslem.

midnighter:


They will now ask you if you can really be a woman or if you're just a man using female photo

Somebody chased a grown man around and around his house, got what she was looking for and then went crying to her parents, does it make sense?

If you don't enter keke can keke driver carry you

Nobody should beat anybody but then nobody should go looking for beating if they don't want it. This is not a perfect world or romance movie where people do exactly what you want or expect

If she just asked him where he had been and he snapped and started raining slaps on her then I could understand but these beans get serious weevil. How can you claim right after provoking somebody

Abi? It's annoying.

Only she went to look and seek for trouble, trouble was avoiding her, her brain didn't tell her to leave the young man alone, she will went further nagging him as if he's a kid. I hate nonsense.
She got what she was looking for.
The Op sef no get mind. Quit begging!
When she Taya, she will come back home begging him in return.

I'm a lady, whom fortunately started thinking like a man years back when I was dating dare devil men in sheep clothing. In the process of surviving what those sadistic love threw at me, I had to become a man inwards but still a female outward.
My.mind became tough through the years which is good nw. Nothing fazes me anymore. I trained my mind to value peace and solitude. And I have little patience for games and mind tricks.

it's good anyways.

patjane:
Every sidechick? Lol Are you calculating base on how the runs ladies in your family are desperate with married men and how dem wish for the house wife to park-our? Quote me when you divorce ur wife and about to get marry again within a year..

I didnt know runs babes was founded & peculiar to the family in nigeria .... buh the facts are out there, visits hotels & guest houses ...you wil know married men chop the so called single gurls more.
Now listen i don't nid to divorce b4 i can marry another gurl ...if you wan shoot ur shot ..shoot !

emeijeh:
Your wife went too far for calling her people (after your very first slap)
What happened to the "no third party interference" sermon on your wedding day?

But Op, are you sure you have not hit or beaten her before that day?

Just keep apologizing.
She has to come back.

I hope someone has dragged you for this blatant display you wrote. Judging from the number of likes u have garnered, I seriously doubt that.
The thing with you abusers is you just need your victims to take your starting slaps lying down. After that, its home free. You progress to beatings and then eventually killing the poor women.
She didn't overreact. She set the precedent against subsequent abuse.
I really don't know who give some of u morons phones

zimach:


Oga with this your advice, I'm not sure you are married. God forbid, what if at the process of trying to slap the woman, sth worst than this happened?? What if the woman was the one that went out and came in at 2am?? I believe they have been having normal misunderstanding and the woman never reacted this way by calling her people. There are many ladies young say? The devil you know is better o. You never jam one you go slap and you won't go free. He should have entered the room and lock himself up there. Let him go and win his wife back.....

She's lucky I'm not the one because she may never come back to that house again.

For your info I'm very happily married though my wife knows the shit she can't try with me. So you want him to keep following her up and down like house fly follow poo when she has already made her decision, a rebellious one at that. Arrant Nonsense.

CHoccolaTE:
Op is not telling the full story
I want to hear the wife's side of the story too
Maybe op did more than slap, maybe he added a few blows or few derogatory words but unfortunately the wife is not here to tell her side of everything.
Maybe their marriage has been rocky for years now or maybe he has hit her before, who knows?

In any case, contact her with written and signed agreement the you will never assault her and if you do you will be arrested, that should be in the contract.

I am sure that one will be enough to convince her of your remorse

Bye

Will the wife also write an agreement she will never harangue him with her mouth again or you think its perfectly normal for her to subject the man to verbal harrassment?
You know how maddening it can be when a woman is dissecting you with her mouth and following you everywhere even when you leave the each place for her?
Do you know ppl kill each other just b/c of words of the mouth?
I don't support men keeping late nights regularly but its perfectly normal to hang out late once in a while,say twice in a month.I'm married, I do that, my wife doesn't complain.
In face,we sit together and gist about my waka d following day,d runs girls in d club,who took who home,etc.
I hate it when you ppl think you can say or do whatever you like and there will be no repercussions,that verbal harrassment or misyarn is what makes males fight and kill themselves sometimes but somehow you ppl believe you can talk and abuse your husband the way you like without consequences ever

Marraige is an institution where two becomes one. Thay means as an individual a man in marraige becomes half. Understand this and you will never have a better yesterday.

victorian:
Abi? It's annoying.

Only she went to look and seek for trouble, trouble was avoiding her, her brain didn't tell her to leave the young man alone, she will went further nagging him as if he's a kid. I hate nonsense.
She got what she was looking for.
The Op sef no get mind. Quit begging!
When she Taya, she will come back home begging him in return.

I'm a lady, whom fortunately started thinking like a man years back when I was dating dare devil men in sheep clothing. In the process of surviving what those sadistic love threw at me, I had to become a man inwards but still a female outward.
My.mind became tough through the years which is good nw. Nothing fazes me anymore. I trained my mind to value peace and solitude. And I have little patience for games and mind tricks.

it's good anyways.

You just summarised it. Act like a lady and think like a man! This is like military warfare.

The lady was even at an advantage because he overreacted to her own overreacting and nagging by slapping her. So she had the upper hand because he committed the bigger crime by becoming violent. He knew it and that's why he started apologising, kneeling and begging.

She would have kept crying, dramatising and keeping malice until he would be forced to agree not to stay out late again . Then the next time he tries that 2AM will be a different story

She was even winning and still went and called her mother for what I don't even know. Did your mother tell you to finish your husband with mouth Your mother who will even insult you join and ask you when you're going back to your house.

This guy is even sorry, what of those ones who will slap your mouth like soured red stew without any conscience? Very ridiculous something o

hmmmn...i have never even gone beyond 9pm unless its a soccer match an d its usually a nearby place, i have never tasted beer nor alcohol
and yet my wife could do worse than this.(those early days)
the bottom line is (IT COULD AS WELL AS BEEN 2PM )u have to respect others to get respect yourself.- she took respect out of the window and that's provocation.
he came 2 am..that may be wrong in her eyes...why could she not talk to him gently and once he demand some privacy, u leave him and he would definitely come back to you.

A lot of women folks say a lot of things but would not believe nagging deserve some slap.
and yet they can not take nay tolerate the noise of just one mosquito making those noise in your ears.( if u have a mosquito net.).
at the end of the day, you will have to clap back to the mosquito to have your peace.

back to the topic ..i think he has begged for forgiveness. ...the ball is in her court.

Our dads and our mums have slapped us countless times, we still love them.

some did worse things than slap.

what i am trying to say is a nuisance deserve a reply. if you don't want a man over you just don't get married and no husband will hurt you or slap you
but if you argue with a bus conductor (outsiders) , u may still receive the slap anyway.


NB. the picture attached was sent to me by an office friend just yesterday via whatsapp and i told her i was surprised it coming from a lady. she chuckled like saying she knows that women problem-their mouth

no offense though

xendra:
I'm not surprised to see men saying she should have kept this within the family. na from clap dem dey enter dance. a man that can come home 2am and slap the wife that same night deserves no sympathy. na so she go keep quiet till it gets worse and he kills her.

naija men, Una try o

madridguy:
Only brain dead family will follow their son to this kind yeye waka. He paid her pride price, and never will a reasonable man goes to his wife house for any marital settlement.

As in ehn? Real brain dead.
I know a popular gospel artist, a lady. Shes from delta state based in Nigeria,she met a delta guy too but the guy is based in the US. He came home married her, took her with him to the US.
One fateful night, she was wake til 1am, her husband is not back home. She called his number he didn't pick. 3am, she heard his car drive into the garage. She was fuming, she quickly ran to lock the door. He walked towards the door, rang the bell. She didn't answer. He rang several times, then called her number, she picked and screamed he should go back to where he's coming from, and how can a responsible man be out this late.
The man was in huge shock
He was like what

He didn't argue. He cut the call. Walked back to his car, drove off.
She didn't see him for like one week.

Then exactly one week, her dad called her to take the next flight to Nigeria and something has happened, and she's needed urgently.
With panic she travelled down to Nigeria.
When she got to her parents house. The dad told her to seat down, cos of what he's about to say.

She sat down. He gave her an envelop. She opened it,

Guess what's inside?

A divorce letter from her husband through his lawyers.

She was like what?

The dad said first all, I want to hear your own version of what happened between u and your husband. She said her own. Her father shook his head and said so u have the guts to lock your husband out from his own home!
Where did you loose your home training? It seems life abroad has turned u into somethingelse. In urhobo land, no woman locks a man out of his home. And no urhobo man who knows his worth will accept such!
Your husband came here few days ago with a lawyer and he said, he's not marrying anymore and it's over between both of you. He was in great anger, but he tried controlling himself.

See what you've done to your marriage?

Anyways he has gone back to the US, and he said he will change all the locks and will send all your luggage home. And also report to the authorities there, that u are no longer his wife, he has filed for divorce.


My brother, this woman weak!

That's how she got divorced. The husband chose Festus keyamo as his lawyer, he no waste time at all. And Trust Festus, he doesn't waste time in his duties as a Barrister back then .

He's remarried again.