uninspired07:


You are ugly & it pains you that you don’t get the attention of men. That’s why you want to destroy the relationships of other Nigerian women by propagating hateful feminist ideologies.

You go old for your Papa house. Ugly mutete.

midnighter:


They have answered o, and as usual they are vomiting nonsense!

A prosperous year to you and your family!

RisenPhoenix:
Your mistake was permitting her to become the breadwinner. When you experienced a downturn, you should have adjusted your family's standards of living down to comfortable levels accordingly, instead of using her own money to maintain that standard. Because you couldn't relinquish the good life, you have effectively relinquished control over your home. No matter how little you make, adjust your expenses to stay within that income. Do not touch her money under any circumstances.

sassysure:

Stop saying when u married your wife She had nothing.
U guys have been using this misconception for so long it look like the truth now.

As long as she has started school( be it primary or secondary) she has something. She is going somewhere!
She is not statistic. Some of u marry your wives when she is in uni, just finished uni, or finished secondary, or writing jamb or learning handiwork.
She is on the move. Get that into your skull!
U marry her, give her belle, she halts her progress for u and u are saying she has nothing!
Can u stop?

This kind of mentality is what makes u guys think u own a woman like a property.

That u fought your family to marry her is not new. More women have denied their families for the men they love.

Bring yourself low from your high pedestals and enjoy your woman.

Heaven help us if your wife should come here.
Or better still, invite her here so we will have a balanced presentation.

cococandy:
You’re the one hyperventilating over a simple post. If there’s any pain and hurt in here, it’s in your post.

LINTUNE:
the name can help ,but it will always be her responsibility,that man will not remain in that position for once ,cos he is making effort ..

strungup79:


You're wrong. It's not my mind telling me things. I'm not dumb cos that's what your statement suggests. Before the tables turned, we used to discuss issues, then she started trying to lord it over me using disrespectful language and coded insults. At this stage I was still bringing some finance. I complained and broached the issue of her changing attitude. Guess what - she told me exactly what you're saying, that I was imagining things because of my down turn. Then it became full blown disrespect. If it was stress of being the the bread winner why sideline me and go consulting her family over what concerns us. We used to discuss everything right down to her work. I'm not dumb or stupid. She just feels she has an upper hand and is trying to show it.

Chikicaka:


It would come, sooner than you expect, stay strong, keep praying and work hard, stuffs like this go both ways, my ex back then we both had nothing only our dreams, we prayed together, hustled together and worked hard together, I gave up a lot and supported him more than I even supported myself and he hit it, came home one day and said he needed space, that he needed to mix up with the same crowd he now rolls in, no sugar coated words but he gave me hot hot, I was crushed, I was battling with my weight and felt inadequate, but I moved on today if you see me you would not recognize me at all, God has restored in a million folds all that i felt i had lost, he came back begging i forgave him but couldn't stoop so low again this time he was truly not my level anymore, I took that pain and it propelled me, thankfully he was just a boyfriend and not a hubby, as in this case she is your wife, zone in on her good qualities and forgive her, tell her how much her attitude hurts you,, hopefully she changes, may God bless us all.

strungup79:
I'm 42 years old and married with 3 children (2 boys and a girl). I got married to this beatiful lady 13 years ago and everything was bliss until three years ago when my business experienced a serious down turn.

My wife's upturn in fortune however brought out the ugliness in her. She started trying to assume control of the home. She stopped consulting me on decisions concerning our home, rather consulting her parents. She practically turned my kids against me as she painted me as irresponsible.

funmisticqueen:
Cry me a river

bukatyne:


I don't get:

The man can help as domestics is her responsibility.

The woman must however provide even though it is the man's responsibility while doing her domestic chores!?

Repent, this is a new year.

uninspired07:


Thank God you didn’t try to disprove my assertion that you are ugly & soaked with bitterness—which means you agree with my assessment.

I have been reading comments on this section for almost 5 years & I actually you were harsh to men because you were beautiful. I was shocked when I saw your picture & I now realized why you are bitter. You’re an ugly person inside & out & it has really damaged you as a person.

You need to see a therapist fast because you might just shoot up a gathering of men given your hate for men.

I pray God heals you this year. Amen.

strungup79:


I'm not a saint, I have flaws like everybody does. When I say order I mean eg The children can't watch certain movies it's not adequate for them. Ebuka is old enough to do house chores u shouldn't be doing it for him. Why is Nneka still awake and watching TV by 10 pm when she has school tomorrow. When it has to do with her i say things like honey you know that aint right and when she insists i tell her she's free to do what she wants. Sometimes I tell her you can't be listening to certain music or watch certain movies with the kids around as it's not adequate for them. How is that wrong for Christ's sake> How can wanting the right thing done in your home be a wrong thing?

funmisticqueen:
for saying the truth? Or not telling all you testosterone laden apeshits who only think with their joystick what you want to hear or stroking your China doll egos.

uninspired07:


You’ve spoken well here but you got one thing wrong: women don’t love men, because they don’t have the capacity to love— they can only submit.

And in this instance, we are talking about Nigeria women here—the most materialistic & self seeking strain of women in the world.

Teerach:
Op sorry bout ur marital situation. One or two Nigeria dad has always been in ur situation. My dad was no exception. My mom doesn't smile when it comes to cash n painted n still paint my dad pretty bad. Turning us against him. But we knew better. Lol. Everyone of us love my dad way more than her. We give him things more before we give her. Because the truth always reveals itself. Your kids won't turn against you. They may not listen to u now cos of fear of her. Don't fret cos they know what's going on.
My dad paid our fees n would give us the little he had without complaining. Mom would always nag n paint him bad. They are separated though. Money issue separated them. Just exactly as ur wife is doing. Lol. Mind you I'm a Lady. I've sworn never to thread that part n I've kept to my word cos I know what it feels like coming from a broken home.
My advice, just separate from her for the main time. Be responsible to your kids. Pick yourself again.
Ur even lucky. My dad retired n while he was waiting to be paid, she started treating him badly. Wouldn't give him food bla bla bla. He zoomed off when he collected his gratuity. But he kept check for monthly feeding because she refused to relocate with him. She goes about telling anyone who cares to listen that he didn't give her a dime which is a lie. Even now, she's financially better than him cos she didn't contribute a dime to anything that concerns him or we the kids. But as God would have it, we visit her Dec n other holidays, but my dad gets the cash from us while she gets our presence more. Every one sibling work with the mindset that she has cash so she doesn't need ours. We give our dad rather.

strungup79:
I'm 42 years old and married with 3 children (2 boys and a girl). I got married to this beatiful lady 13 years ago and everything was bliss until three years ago when my business experienced a serious down turn.

My wife on the other hand witnessed an upturn in fortunes and practically became the bread winner in the home.

Her good financial fortune had me focussed on trying to get myself back on track. I tried getting a job, but it was not forth coming.

My business continued to dwindle and then I resorted to doing small odd jobs just so I could contribute to the family upkeep.

My wife's upturn in fortune however brought out the ugliness in her. She started trying to assume control of the home. She stopped consulting me on decisions concerning our home, rather consulting her parents. She practically turned my kids against me as she painted me as irresponsible.

We initially had assess to each other's account, but now she has accounts hidden from me. I just found out she bought land somewhere, though she doesn't know I have that knowledge.

She has become rude and disrespectful and her parents and siblings have taken over my home. I am so pained because all I ever did was show her love and respect.

She didn't like the fact i tried to have order in my home and that seems to be my sin. I have never hit her or been wicked to her.

Right now, I'm pained and confused. I don't know what to do. Someone please help.

uninspired07:


Thank God you didn’t try to disprove my assertion that you are ugly & soaked with bitterness—which means you agree with my assessment.

I have been reading comments on this section for almost 5 years & I actually you were harsh to men because you were beautiful. I was shocked when I saw your picture & I now realized why you are bitter. You’re an ugly person inside & out & it has really damaged you as a person.

You need to see a therapist fast because you might just shoot up a gathering of men given your hate for men.

I pray God heals you this year. Amen.

Martinez39:
Michellekabod2, Ubunja and Co. Was this not what we were discussing? Give a man power, money, and make him the bread winner, his family will benefit from him. Give a woman money, power, and make her the bread winner, her husband will see hell. OP needs to take the red-pill.

Even though the man is at home, his wife has turned turned the kids against him in the cruel and petty game of power dynamics. And many girls had the dishonesty to attack me when I created THIS TOPIC and they acted like parental alienation is not really a thing to worry about and the father should "just spend some time with the kid". Here is a man who is present in his home and yet the kid has turned against him (a case similar to that of emmaodet). Never underestimate the power of brain washing and the wickedness and brutal nature of women. Women are not fair players.

Indeed, Ilekokonit was right in THIS TOPIC OF HIS. Also the arguments and contributions made by ubunja and myself are valid. A family is supposed to work as a unit but the woman purchased properties without the man's knowledge, turned the kids against him, and disrespects him yet folks like funmisticqueen (whose personality is as ugly as she looks) turned this on the man insinuating that the man must have been cruel to his wife in the past. The op opened a joint account with his wife but now, the wife has gotten a secret account.

Any man that remains oblivious to female nature will suffer and get burnt.

luvmijeje:


For 10 years your marriage was blissful! Why do I find that had to believe?

You didn't cheat on your wife during those 10 years of blissful marriage? For your wife to sucessfully paint you as irresponsible, emphasis on sucessfully then l doubt your marriage was blissful for the for the first 10 years.

The issue with your marriage is lack of trust. Your wife don't trust you. And it can't be because she is earning more than you.

poseidon12:


Wow! Go easy please. Don't mind the insults. I like your frankness.

strungup79:


I'm not a saint, I have flaws like everybody does. When I say order I mean eg The children can't watch certain movies it's not adequate for them. Ebuka is old enough to do house chores u shouldn't be doing it for him. Why is Nneka still awake and watching TV by 10 pm when she has school tomorrow. When it has to do with her i say things like honey you know that aint right and when she insists i tell her she's free to do what she wants. Sometimes I tell her you can't be listening to certain music or watch certain movies with the kids around as it's not adequate for them. How is that wrong for Christ's sake> How can wanting the right thing done in your home be a wrong thing?

MedicH:


Inputs and mindsets like this give me hope of looking forward to getting married. Very encouraging and saintly. You are a winner.

MedicH:


Do you even understand what is going on in the union? The problem is the woman earns more money and believes she gets to say who does what.

Preshy561:

This is so sad.
I understand your plight. If there's how you can search for a greener pasture by moving away from her for the main time, please do.
She might think you aren't doing good enough by seeing you home everytime.

Sorry about the situation.

RisenPhoenix:


They once did... until the new cultural farce emerged that a woman must help/support her husband in the home; some dodo interpreting that help to be financial rather than emotional and mental. That was when society started placing an expectation on women to become at least partial breadwinners; and made men give up part or all of their control over the household in exchange. Men opened the door for their own emasculation; no doubt about it.

strungup79:
I'm 42 years old and married with 3 children (2 boys and a girl). I got married to this beatiful lady 13 years ago and everything was bliss until three years ago when my business experienced a serious down turn.

My wife on the other hand witnessed an upturn in fortunes and practically became the bread winner in the home.

Her good financial fortune had me focussed on trying to get myself back on track. I tried getting a job, but it was not forth coming.

My business continued to dwindle and then I resorted to doing small odd jobs just so I could contribute to the family upkeep.

My wife's upturn in fortune however brought out the ugliness in her. She started trying to assume control of the home. She stopped consulting me on decisions concerning our home, rather consulting her parents. She practically turned my kids against me as she painted me as irresponsible.

We initially had assess to each other's account, but now she has accounts hidden from me. I just found out she bought land somewhere, though she doesn't know I have that knowledge.

She has become rude and disrespectful and her parents and siblings have taken over my home. I am so pained because all I ever did was show her love and respect.

She didn't like the fact i tried to have order in my home and that seems to be my sin. I have never hit her or been wicked to her.

Right now, I'm pained and confused. I don't know what to do. Someone please help.