[quote author=Banty6 post=86141693]

Mr Perfect � [/quote

your a stupid parent.

You can try, but you can't stop it ....

You must realise your son has gone far tey! tey!! Take him out and have a heart to heart talk with him. You've got to connect with him very fast, be sincere, open, be frank and advise him on the consequences of not getting his priorities in life right.

Tell him he is free to have friends, God fearing friends whether male or female and be free to invite them home sometimes. However, engaging in sex is no no. Tell him as a child of God, that is fornication...... Talk to him with love, get him to open up. Subsequently get him to break off from that relationship and any other. Draw him close, go other together more often and pray for him always. God will see you through.

kurupt1:
Your the cause of ur problems! What is a sixteen year old doing with a smart phone??See a lot of you parents are spoiling these kids

I’m supposed to write him letters when i go abroad?

[quote author=Happyguy201 post=86141726][/quote]

Okay.. Happy now?

[te]

Invite the Mia over to the house that way you get to meet your son's friend and give them some ground rules. Encourage openness aswell. Your son should be able to tell you anything.

It's even a "son"and you're acting very worried, you should thank your stars that, the reverse is not the case here;i.e. You're not the parent of the girl who's probably in same age bracket with your son.

Or your son isn't into gang,drugs ish. Myself as an example, I was already an elder in the cult I was in,while in sec school. I spent most of my outside school during school hours even when my parents were very strict. Thank God I realized myself quickly (not because of the strictness of my parents).

Open communication is the key. Don't act like our parents,who thought we could be upright through severe beatings and punishments.

Most of the miscreants;women of easy virtues,armed robbers,thugs, kidnappers, hooligans,etc in our society today,had/have better parents than us,when it comes to strictness and coercion,but the difference between us, when you compare with the aforementioned(as children to our parents, before and now) is clear.

Talk things through with your son(the era of military system of training a child is gone). He needs orientation and enlightenment. No be by gragra (it's not by might). Selah!..

Ahhh, that's a sad one , looks like the Aunty is running down your company thru your son. Sorry ma

Like father like son

At least your son is not gay

Your Son understands the Game early.... Lol

You shud be happy.... Just talk to him so he shudnt get carried away

Btw! Do you guys live in Nigeria?

Maybe he is replicating what you did to your parents

That girl is probably olosho.. collecting money from your kid

I can read a whole lot of rubbish comments here
16 he is very ready for a relationship, at 14 I already had a girlfriend .its not big deal , it’s just to caution him and Channel his mind to the right path ,also tell him to invite the girl maybe for lunch , eat with the both of them ask her questions and know the kind of person she is

kurupt1:
Your the cause of ur problems! What is a sixteen year old doing with a smart phone??See a lot of you parents are spoiling these kids

Does one need a smart phone to send and receive SMS?

Did you really read what the op posted at all?

yenereal:


I did this when I was his age. How can I advise?

Well Mia doesn't look older from their chats; Mia may be 15 or same age with him.
No matter how over-protective you are, he may still find other options.
He has entered the bloom of youth, so beating him may not make any difference. You may seize his phone.
But most importantly, you need to advise him. Tell him he's not up to the age of being in a relationship yet, the consequences he'll face and the shame he'll bring to the family should he get the girl pregnant. This should be the time you need to become more friendly with him.
He needs advice.

I appreciate your comment even though am not the op. You will make a good parent.

Tiffbuxas:
Open communication is basically the key.... Present him with the facts and give him an opportunity to come clean. Let him know the consequences of his actions both short term and long term.
Contact aunty Mia not to quarrel o buh be firm in making your point.
Your son like a lot of young ones in his age bracket thinks he's a big boy especially since he's smart and getting a lot of attention.

Situations like this don't just disappear especially if he's already sexually involved so continuous evaluation and communication will really help you know what's going on in his head.
God help us all

Nice one too.

From your post, I could deduce you're the typical African strict dad. Well, i commend you for that. However, that attitude worked many years ago, not today. You gotta let go!

In today's world, you have to be a COOL dad. Your son is 16 years and there is nothing wrong with him having a girlfriend. Unless he is been taken advantage of by an older person. What you should do is get him some condoms and talk sex with him.

Be a friend to your son, not just a dad. Your son can only communicate freely if he doesn't fear you. Fear doesn't do shits in bringing up a child. I know many folks who used that strategy and they are in a pitiable situation today.

Be flexible man... If you choose to handle this issue via the typical African man way, you will only be accelerating the issue.

Shalom!
Banty6

SangoOlukosoOba:
Better use for money or fortification rituals before he disappoints you finally

haba am sure even yourself once troubled your parents

OurBestWriter:
From your post, I could deduce you're the typical African strict dad. Well, i commend you for that. However, that attitude worked many years ago, not today. You gotta let go!

In today's world, you have to be a COOL dad. Your son is 16 years and there is nothing wrong with him having a girlfriend. Unless he is been taken advantage of by an older person. What you should do is get him some condoms and talk sex with him.

Be a friend to your son, not just a dad. Your son can only communicate freely if he doesn't fear you. Fear doesn't do shits in bringing up a child. I know many folks who used that strategy and they are in a pitiable situation today.

Be flexible man... If you choose to handle this issue via the typical African man way, you will only be accelerating the issue.

Shalom!
Banty6

Thanks alot man

cruzydal:
I can read a whole lot of rubbish comments here
16 he is very ready for a relationship, at 14 I already had a girlfriend .its not big deal , it’s just to caution him and Channel his mind to the right path ,also tell him to invite the girl maybe for lunch , eat with the both of them ask her questions and know the kind of person she is

Thanks alot my friend

palmshots:
Your Son understands the Game early.... Lol

You shud be happy.... Just talk to him so he shudnt get carried away

Btw! Do you guys live in Nigeria?

Yes we live in Nigeria.. Lagos

I wouldn't say your son isn't of age for girlfriends and xhit, besides he uses an iPhone already.. my actual problem is that the said gf seems to be using him for money, sounds like she even have a kid.

you gotta talk to him about that and the rest posters said, do about it gently. Days of strictness to one's kid are gone

YoungLionken:
It's even a "son"and you're acting very worried, you should thank your stars that, the reverse is not the case here;i.e. You're not the parent of the girl who's probably in same age bracket with your son.

Or your son isn't into gang,drugs ish. Myself as an example, I was already an elder in the cult I was in,while in sec school. I spent most of my outside school during school hours even when my parents were very strict. Thank God I realized myself quickly (not because of the strictness of my parents).

Open communication is the key. Don't act like our parents,who thought we could be upright through severe beatings and punishments.

Most of the miscreants;women of easy virtues,armed robbers,thugs, kidnappers, hooligans,etc in our society today,had/have better parents than us,when it comes to strictness and coercion,but the difference between us, when you compare with the aforementioned(as children to our parents, before and now) is clear.

Talk things through with your son(the era of military system of training a child is gone). He needs orientation and enlightenment. No be by gragra (it's not by might). Selah!..

Thanks alot my friend

ziegurf:




...anu mpam bad boi, your type spoilt at 10



I shall report you to Jboy, you won't enter heaven anymore

Please report him

While you have set out to do what’s exactly in your mind! There’s little influence one can exert over this matter. However; bear in mind that parents child communication is one aspects of parenting you mustn’t ignore. Do not spare the rod and spoil the child, Yuu also don’t want to drive the child away far from yuu with the rod! See, it’s imperative you begin to talk to him about his sexuality, trust me, he can’t get it anywhere better other than from Yuu his father. He’s your responsibility Yo! Don’t mess this up. Sex Education is one good movie to watch!

I see nothing wrong with what he is doing. I started having sex at the age of 11 in 2010 and since then I have been enjoying it. Infact the lady that bleeped me was about 8 years older than me. Last year alone I had sex with about 25 different ladies. Just let the young dude enjoy himself. Life is too short abeg.

Forget those rubbish and shallow comments here
For a teenager it is normal they want to explore and find out different things but if Mia is way older than he is then it is a problem. I think you have a conversation with him not scolding actually so that he will be more open to you.
Tell him you would like to meet Mia and notice his reaction or probably scare him that you will speak to her by yourself.
I think he finds it more easy to communicate with her and share almost everything thoughts with her... Just communicate with him properly

Mymynd4u:


Tank God ur son is a boy wit a dick. Let his fvck jare..... No be pussy na, na rod him get... Leave the young boy alone.... Na iPhone e dey use sef, abeg let the fvcking go on and dont disrupt them


Ur son is fvcking a bigger pussy... He is starboy ol

By your comment one can figure out your age.
Anyway, the little boy being in a relationship should b the least of your problems. The bigger issue is the fact that he's being milked dry, how could the girl he's in a relationship with be dropping money at home? She is part of the bread winners and her source of finance is obviously this young chap.
But you won't see this since the only thing people of your age think about is sex.

You have given distance with ur son. When I was growing up, my mum used to give me some advice that are still useful today.
You need to talk to him heart to heart. Let him see danger in what's doing.
When I was in secondary school my mum used to tell me, the moment u impregnate a girl, ur schooling stop. He's in theaters age bracket of having girl friend.
You might just highlight some pros and cons of having affair at tender age.
You should also see the girl in question, advice her and let her see reason why the sex should stop with ur son.
Beaten up ur son may not solve the problem butt complicate the issues.

na talk go resolve the matter las las !!

Low self esteem boy