Papanwamaikpe:
Lmao nobi fall. The guy na smooth criminal

if woman call you BIG HEAD, just know say u sabi

He should educate d son n b more friendly to him.... don't know while it taken them enternity to introduce sex education

I think the best is advise him... afterwards allow people to make their mistakes and learn from it

Banty6:
This one too

For God's sake.
Don't lay hands on him If you haven't pls.
This is him evolving to the stage we all went through. Nigga is still young which is understandable for you correcting or restricting his movements and other little do's and don'ts.
Sit him down. Ask him questions about he came about the girl.
Make him confine in you.
Boy will still try maintain the relationship regardless of the approach you use for him.
Just try sit him down and create a father/son relationships of why he shouldn't for now.
All the best

Banty6:
.. how can i stop this?

Your son is wat we called " Nigro Gigolo the original Nigolo"

Tiffbuxas:
you're not a child....you should know wen to joke and wen to be serious...if it was your son or sibling I guess you're be super proud of his actions

Banty should be proud that his son can land his own lady. Some grown ass men on Nairaland CANNOT even land just a prostitute for a night.

I would advise him to talk to him about women and safe sex. If you slut shame him or abuse him, you will damage him mentally.

Remember, that boy is technically an adult. You know he's. He's heading to university already, so use your head because you are also a man

The day a son of mine turns 16 and sends such poetic messages to a lady, trust me, I am arranging money for them to get married and I will give him a house right away.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with him taking responsibility to be a father if he can have sex.

kurupt1:
Your the cause of ur problems! What is a sixteen year old doing with a smart phone??See a lot of you parents are spoiling these kids

A 16 year old male is NOT a kid. We keep getting it all wrong there. Age of adulthood vary across the world. The fact that even in the US some states set the official age of consent to 16 should say a lot about a 16 year old male

Banty6:
My Son recently turned 16, he’s actually preparing for Utme and while he does, he works with me partime at my Firm. I do alot of traveling and he knows the business. He fills in for me.. last night, we were eating dinner and his phone won’t stop ringing and everytime it rings, he tries to silence it. I was watching him..then phone rings again and he tries to excuse himself from the table but i asked him to not move an inch until everyone has left the table.. then out of the blues i asked him to hand me his phone.. he knows the rules (never bring your phone to the dining) so he hands me his phone then i set it aside.. it wasn’t even up to one minute this number calls again and the caller name was Mia.. .. i got curious i asked him and he said she was his friend.. fast forward i asked him for his unlock code, he gave it and I didn’t use it right away.. i held on to his phone and later after dinner i checked around and the same Mia and himself they’ve been exchanging text messages and calls.. what do i make of this? My guess is they been having sex too and i guess aunty Mia is older.. how can i stop this?

As far as I am concerned you haven't actually nurtured this kid properly hence him hiding things for you. From your post you sound domineering and authoritarian, it's wrong.
Its hardly effective for Teenagers of today. What happens to being engaging with this lad by being kind and friendly to him?

How many times have you have a heart to heart discussion with him regarding his current challenges, dreams, and life in general? he is at a very important stage of his life so he needs guidance and mentorship. Am not sure you did this. You were busy imposing ridiculous rules that makes no sense.Stop viewing him as a kid rather treat him as an
adult because that is how he view himself.

Just because he is your child doesn't permit you to invade his privacy in a disrespectful manner, it ain't Right, and never do that.

You may sweep aside my comment but I can tell your method of parenting is not fit-for-purpose. and that kid may in future surprise you when he make a move you never imagine even in your wildest dreams.

Not a big deal i had my first hole experience at age 7


In my 30's now i am still responsible.

Times have truly changed ooo

Reading these comments made me realize that.

16 year old

Invasion of privacy? ;

You need wisdom to handle this delicate issue, may God give you plenty of it.

You may also seek counsel from a professional Counsellor.

Don't forget to ignore some of the discouraging, senseless and off-point replies you will get here.

Peace

Free the young man. But advice him. And don't check his phone again.

Guy man son..
Carry the bros sitdown let am no sey u don ball before advice him no need for beating na normal tin let him understand that they have different kind of women too.
For now he should be focused simple.

eni4real:
You suspect Blogger, Blogger??
Well, 16 years old is well exposed to Adult terms in this internet age!!
Some 14 years old Nairalanders are here!!!

You are right though.

Who else loves his 'I'd rather have you for lunch' Convo part?


Dude is smooth like hell

Vortex369:
The day a son of mine turns 16 and sends such poetic messages to a lady, trust me, I am arranging money for them to get married and I will give him a house right away.

There is absolutely wrong with him taking responsibility to be a father if he can have sex.

Easier said than done.

I don't think the girl is older than the guy, i.e, judging from her constant greetings/trying to be respectful.

I'm glad that with the look of things, he's innocent, obedient and not entirely secretive. More like an open book.
There're guys his age that same will be happening, and you won't even know/notice because of so much codedness. For one, he respects you. That's a plus.

Find out who Mia is, her background, what she does, where she comes from, etc. Let the boy be open about the relationship. If possible, make him invite her and do your own coded observations.


I'm just a little worried about one thing.
If the guy is 16, how old can the girl possibly be to be begging for money. 15? 14? 16?
So weird.

It's normal for kids his age to start experimenting with dating and sex. Guess it's time to have "the talk" with him cos I doubt there's anything you can do to actually stop him. Just make sure he understands the consequences and how to protect himself cos if he's prepping for utme then by September or later he'll be out of your sight and care when he leaves for school. And maybe try to meet the girl too and make sure you give them both the talk(embarrassing as it might be for both of them, they need it. And you at least need to meet who he's dating so you can follow up if need be).

What I advice against is anger and shouting and trying to use scare tactics, trust me it won't work, it will just build resentment and he'll start actively keeping secrets from you. What you need is to make sure he understands that he can trust you and be open to you cos you'll give him the best advice he can get. Good luck.

hausadreturn:
I don't think the girl is older than the guy, i.e, judging from her constant greetings/trying to be respectful.

I'm glad that with the look of things, he's innocent, obedient and not entirely secretive. More like an open book.
There're guys his age that same will be happening, and you won't even know/notice because of so much codedness. For one, he respects you. That's a plus.

Find out who Mia is, her background, what she does, where she comes from, etc. Let the boy be open about the relationship. If possible, make him invite her and do your own coded observations.


I'm just a little worried about one thing.
If the guy is 16, how old can the girl possibly be to be begging for money. 15? 14? 16?
So weird.

Exactly my pov. I think the boy is still kinda innocent and he definitely has respect for his mom. And I think she has built an environment where he can trust her. At 16 I knew if my mom heard anything about relationships from me what would follow would be a beating so I was very coded and secretive, and tbh I could've done better had I been able to open up and get advice from her. Later down the line things happened in my life(she got to find out about my depression, struggles with life and struggles in school) and my mom was crying like have I been such a bad mom that you kept this a secret from me for years(I just had to dodge that question cos yes mom, the way you raised me its either keep my secrets or face the rod for being open and that just led to me being secretive about every and anything)

And who told you they have had sex?

OP lives in Ikotun.....no wonder his child is wayward

Banty6:
My Son recently turned 16, he’s actually preparing for Utme and while he does, he works with me partime at my Firm. I do alot of traveling and he knows the business. He fills in for me.. last night, we were eating dinner and his phone won’t stop ringing and everytime it rings, he tries to silence it. I was watching him..then phone rings again and he tries to excuse himself from the table but i asked him to not move an inch until everyone has left the table.. then out of the blues i asked him to hand me his phone.. he knows the rules (never bring your phone to the dining) so he hands me his phone then i set it aside.. it wasn’t even up to one minute this number calls again and the caller name was Mia.. .. i got curious i asked him and he said she was his friend.. fast forward i asked him for his unlock code, he gave it and I didn’t use it right away.. i held on to his phone and later after dinner i checked around and the same Mia and himself they’ve been exchanging text messages and calls.. what do i make of this? My guess is they been having sex too and i guess aunty Mia is older.. how can i stop this?

Mia may not b older than him or not what u shuld have done is send text message like this pls i can not ur ur calls let met at so so place 2mao to see maybe she is old or not without ur son knw ooo

hausadreturn:
Easier said than done.

That's actually my plan. To get my son a wife latest at 18. His Life is already planned before birth

1. That's invasion of privacy, and posting screenshots of his chats on NairaLand? that's low even for you. if he finds out, he will resent you.

2. instead of ending it, why not get to know the girl and guide them together. You might get to like the girl. Just let him know you care about him instead of forcing decisions on him.

Banty6:


He’s not even 18 yet I’m responsible for him so thank you

Bringing the matter here isn't the best idea (Especially since you didn't cover the part that has his name on it)

1 thing I can deduced from this is that your son is experienced in the oza room and hanty in the picture is just clingy unto him because she sees he has a bright future ahead of him.

Your son on the other hand already feels like a man (Heav he's getting so busy with work at 16)and he might feels he needs to be doing what men do.

I finished from school early (earlier than him) and I could remember my mom was always taking me to her workplace (Mostly for show offs). My case was a little different because my mom job was a government work so I wasn't getting paid and I was just a added expenses at work

Let me cut to the chase...

I think you need to counsel your son

Let him know the dangers of premarital sex, let him know condoms are never ever safe (They leak or burst and he can get a woman pregnant or contact a STD).

S*x will be so enjoyable for a guy of his age (Been there lol) and trying to stop him might be very very hard.

I just think you should get him more engaged. Buy him a play station perhaps or let him take a guitar or musical lessons

Above all, you need to keep counseling him...

Make him listen to confessions from women from the spirit world sent to destroy men with bright future.

Let him know STD are real, Mami waters and Co are real..

Just keep talking to him.

Give him hope of freedom at age 21 (He'll be done with school, just tell him that it's just a little while longer)

I don't know what else to write and I hope that I've been able to make a pint of sense

And for the love of God delete the screenshot that carries his name. Abeg

I rest my case

MyVILLAGEpeople:
I see nothing wrong with what he is doing. I started having sex at the age of 11 in 2010 and since then I have been enjoying it. Infact the lady that bleeped me was about 8 years older than me. Last year alone I had sex with about 25 different ladies. Just let the young dude enjoy himself. Life is too short abeg.

You are 21 and you hmm hmm with over 25 ladies last year

Na wa ooooooooooo

Are you not scared of STD or Demonly transmitted disease lol

kelvinrhs:


You are 21 and you hmm hmm with over 25 ladies last year

Na wa ooooooooooo

Are you not scared of STD or Demonly transmitted disease lol

I am far above sicknesses and diseases. I am not an ordinary human being.

kurupt1:
Your the cause of ur problems! What is a sixteen year old doing with a smart phone??See a lot of you parents are spoiling these kids

Shut the Bleep up

MyVILLAGEpeople:


I am far above sicknesses and diseases. I am not an ordinary human being.

Haaaa so it's the ladies that should beware of you

Vortex369:


That's actually my plan. To get my son a wife latest at 18. His Life is already planned before birth

Again, easier said than done.