I hope you are not planning to Stab the man to death for coming back late free that man before he starts coming home Early just to come start beating you since he is looking for job allow him to cool off his BP unless you want to add to his problems.

Tallesty1:
The way some of you jump to conclusions is just annoying. The first thing you're supposed to do is ask questions.

When does he leave home?

Does he stay at home all day and then leave in the evening?

Is it everyday habit.

But no, you Mr know it all already know everything so you quickly concluded and called someone's husband a very very irresponsible man even when the woman clearly stated the man is is nice and caring

Do you know what it means when a Nigeria woman says that a man is nice and caring?

Have you ever seen a woman admit that she's at fault when a relationship is having issues? It is always the man.

@OP If your husband stays at home when you're away and leaves the moment you come back, then something is wrong.

Secondly, not having a job means he's always at home so if he stays at home all day and only leaves at night then it could also mean he takes care of the house in your absence and only stretches his legs at night. People do it.

You also failed to tell us if this is an every day activity so we can only suggest.

Birds of the same feather flocks together. OP, the above person lives same life of your husband.

If the wife who lives with him can see that something is not right with her husband's habit then who are you to defend him whom you haven't seen before and start throwing childish questions to the OP as if she was drunk when she wrote all these? Nairaland with too many professors and keypad warriors

Heistman:
common! This is pure nonsense, were u dia tracking his movement for u to have concluded he's irresponsible and fucking around? ,you're a big fool sir.. that's how one useless pastor in my area back then when I was still in school told my mum to be prayerful cos He saw vision I'm a cultist because I'm an introvert and hardly relate with people

Big fool kill you there. Ogun and Amadioha blow your generation into pieces. Animal. Buhari is more civil and sensible than you

Tim16:
You are working, but he doesn't have any job yet. He comes home late everyday at 12am. You clean the house and provide food for the family, upon that you don't nag, and you are good looking.

Madam you married a very very irresponsible man, and people like him always engage in careless sexual activities with random girls/prostitutes. Most times he could probably be in one brothel having fun. I just pray he shouldn't someday infect you with HIV. same thing happened to my aunty, her husband was living this kind of life and infected her with HIV and both of them died of AIDS living their 4 young kids miserable. It will only take a Divine intervention by the Almighty to change such a man and make him live responsibly... I pray God to come to your aid and touch your husband's heart to become responsible and respect his marriage. I will advice you to become a prayer warrior because of this for there is nothing God can not do. You don't only talk to him you also back it up with fervent prayer I bet you you will see result. May God bless your home. AMEN

You are the most irresponsible man I have ever seen, idiat! You think everyone is like your irresponsible cursed aunty and her innocent husband?
How did you know it wasn't her that infected her innocent husband? Old cow!

i wont advice u to settle on a rash conclusion. Think intelligently, make observations don't suspect him; cos suspecting will breed hatred and this may destabilize ur home. put more pressure on him on the reasons why he comes late through dis u might grind the truth. Other than believing frustrated 'girls' who av wasted their prime yrs fucking around with men and av nw turn single waste bins. they are jealous when dey see a good woman like u who is after the well being of her husband and children. Also pray Prayer is the master key never undermine the potency of prayer

Call him and tell him how you don't like the way he comes back very late in the night that he is no more a teenager rather a married man,take the bull by the horn if he didn't agree because if you continue keeping quiet he may infect you and you die untimely there is nothing like praying frequently for him because he knows what he is doing as an adult.

generationz:
It just takes one terrible betrayal from those friends to reset his brain and make him put his family first.

I've seen this time and again.

With this type of lifestyle, when he has a job it's very likely he will cheat.

Your wisdom is highly appreciated and commendable. Keep it up

If your husband is a nightcrawler, then become your web spiner

tunapawizzy:

why u dey downgrade mosquito na

DaHrNn0001:
Well,i used to have someone like that as a friend and the wife was equally worried but after much talking and talking and she's likewise extremely calm... 2 things she did was.... prayer and she was smart to tell him to invite the friends over to the house,buy the booze and make food for them and his friends saw she was a very good woman that doesn't it deserve what her husband does,they started talking to him likewise and gradually the keep late night only Friday till now... Different strokes for different folks anyways

Very good idea, but the booze and ask his friends to come over

SweetCunt97:
Will it be too much if a husband actually helps out in the house while the woman is actively at work? Marriage is supposed to be for matured minds willing to support each other. Where is the support when a man who has no job goes out everyday and comes back late without nothing to show? The woman works, cleans, feeds the kids, pays d bills... Let's check it.

Giving a helping hand is not a bad idea but some women will like to ride their men just because he is Jobless and expect the man to become their tools. Do you think the husband is happy doing nothing?

magkhan:
OP,

You don't know the internal battles he is facing as an unemployed person/father/husband. Allow him unwind as he see fit. He is an adult. You said he is caring, so let him be please.

Probably when he get's the job it might reduce.

Use the alone time to relax for the next day hustle.

Be at peace.

So you support the kind of lifestyle the man is leading? Something is really really wrong with the black race. No wonder Nigeria and its leaders are doomed and irredeemable.

I don't know when next I will visit Africa

EVILFOREST:

U are not FAR from the TRUTH.
A MAN rarely runs away from an INTELLIGENT DISCUSSION.
Don't be shocked to hear that she competes with the same HUSBAND for T. V. REMOTE

Not all men are intelligent, just as not all women are dumb

Tim16:
Big fool kill you there. Ogun and Amadioha blow your generation into pieces. Animal. Buhari is more civil and sensible than you

big headed foolish man

Ouchbabe:
Pls my fellow Nairalanders,

I have been married for 8years now. My husband is nice and caring but I don't like the fact that he likes moving at night. He comes home as late as 12am.

He is currently looking for a job now and most times his reason for coming home late is because he is hanging out with friends. I have discussed this issue with him severally and expressed that I don't like his night movement. On such occasions he will promise not to come home late but the promise is never kept. I have told him the dangers of moving late in a city like Lagos.

The annoying part is that he is not coming home late from work rather because he i s with friends. Most times our young children will stay up late hoping to see him before going to bed but they will wait in vain as he will not be home before they will sleep off.

Note: Even though I'm working, I make sure the house is clean and food ready before he comes home. I don't nag and I'm good looking.

Pls I need suggestions on how to make him stop this night waka.

Please move to front page for wider view

If when he had job he is used to keeping late for the reasons, or the bad reasons.
2, if the reasons is that he can't stand not feeling is ego positively, or negatively.
3, if you are not in anyway making him to excuse himself.
4, if all above are settled and he is what you said he is to you regardless of the present phase he is passing through, I don't see anything wrong in him being the home keeper for the time being, with that the family will bond seriously.
But hanging out with friends who can't alleviate is situation calls for questions as well as caution.

Gwagone:
You shouldn't be putting pressure on yourself like this
Can you monitor his movements maybe once or twice with caution
Don't react when you notice anything

You want her to transform to monitoring spirit

Am a nite crawler even though am not married.

But if my gal comes to visit...i stil keep late nite hour coz she is too boring for me but very caring.


But i av another gal who will alwys hold intelligent conversation with me ,hence i don't keep late nite hour jus cos of her * intelligent conversation and exposure.


So women are so boring jare...hence d man finds solace in nite crawling

My sister be very careful to the kind of information you absorb when you come to a forum like this ooo. Don't destroy what you've built as a result of advice from some toxic people. Some of them advicing you are going through worst sh**t

SARS will soon visit you and your husband for house. You go say i talk am

Ouchbabe:
Pls my fellow Nairalanders,

I have been married for 8years now. My husband is nice and caring but I don't like the fact that he likes moving at night. He comes home as late as 12am.

He is currently looking for a job now and most times his reason for coming home late is because he is hanging out with friends. I have discussed this issue with him severally and expressed that I don't like his night movement. On such occasions he will promise not to come home late but the promise is never kept. I have told him the dangers of moving late in a city like Lagos.

The annoying part is that he is not coming home late from work rather because he i s with friends. Most times our young children will stay up late hoping to see him before going to bed but they will wait in vain as he will not be home before they will sleep off.

Note: Even though I'm working, I make sure the house is clean and food ready before he comes home. I don't nag and I'm good looking.

Pls I need suggestions on how to make him stop this night waka.

Please move to front page for wider view

When you've done all you possibly physically do, leave the rest to God and focus on yourself and the children.
You can't help someone who doesn't want to be helped.
When I say take care of yourself, I mean TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.

bizhop01:

You want her to transform to monitoring spirit

Jos once or twice oooo aaaabi

mkoabiola:
Am a nite crawler even though am not married.

But if my gal comes to visit...i stil keep late nite hour coz she is too boring for me but very caring.


But i av another gal who will alwys hold intelligent conversation with me ,hence i don't keep late nite hour jus cos of her * intelligent conversation and exposure.


So women are so boring jare...hence d man finds solace in nite crawling

So you yourself, are you intelligent?
Evaluate yourself and answer honestly...

Enemyofpeace:
SARS will soon visit you and your husband for house. You go say i talk am

Mad ooooo

Ilufoye00:
My dear, with time he will change. Please don't stop praying.
Engage him with more conversation and activities, my dad do come home 1am, 2am when we were still young, but today before 8pm he will b at home. Most men who go to bear palour are found of these habit, because u can't b in another man's house till 12am.
Time, environment and friends will play a major role in changing him for better.... God bless ur family

This is a very brilliant comment. I thank God we still have some intelligent and reasonable men on this forum.

When I said that he could either be in a brothel having fun some "king Solomons" we have on Nairaland wanted to behead me. There's no way he could be in friends house till 12 - 1am. He could probably be in a beer parlor or brothel. Any family man who keeps late night for no good and obvious reason is very very Irresponsible... Argue with your foolishness

mkoabiola:
Am a nite crawler even though am not married.

But if my gal comes to visit...i stil keep late nite hour coz she is too boring for me but very caring.


But i av another gal who will alwys hold intelligent conversation with me ,hence i don't keep late nite hour jus cos of her * intelligent conversation and exposure.


So women are so boring jare...hence d man finds solace in nite crawling

2 bottles of 33 for you bros

SultanOfAbia:
I'm sorry Your Husband Has A Job
Trust me he is not jobless
Your husband might be a runs boy.. a.k.a ashawo
At Midnight Waiting at the corner of the Street looking for customer to service..
Coming back at 12am
In other words
He is a Brostitute..

Lol
Bros why nah

galadima77:


See a lady here being as reasonable as guys ought to be and some dude is calling the man very very irresponsible.

Besides, the woman never said he cheats as many are inferring but on the contrary he's "nice and caring". And who says the ones that stay home don't cheat?


I have a friend whose wife complains about same and like the OP's hobby, no job for now. She didn't tell me; he did and when I asked him why he does so and where he hangs around..he said a few of them night crawlers just sit around the neighborhood and gist till it's late and go home, no biggie. She also contributes to some extent.

I begged him to reduce the hours outside because we were childhood friends and lived together till we all got married and know we didn't keep late nights.

Another irresponsible kid spotted

Graxie:
Those of you supporting him, continue until he is arrested by police in the name of raiding. This days they raid, take your phone and send you to a different dungeon. Sometimes they even place gun on your chest and tag you thief. A man is not working, can't he look for something to engage himself? Are there no menial jobs? All I see is a lazy man who doesn't want the kids to know that he is lazy. Madam, press ignore button, stop talking to him about late night. Make it a habit to ignore. With time he will come to his senses. Why wouldn't he be lazy? You are providing for the family, he feels he has nothing to worry about. Assuming he knows you are jobless and there is no hope, I bet you he will be very busy searching for how to feed you guys.

God bless whoever wrote this. You will live long, Amen

crawler

From experience, regardless of what people say here, when men keep late night, two things are involved: alcohol and women.

To be fair to your husband, it's possible he doesn't cheat on you. But if this becomes habitual trust me, one day he will see a round asss olosho that has it just the way he likes it and that will be a defining moment.

But again, if this happens like, say, once in week, then you have nothing to worry about. He is probably just catching up with friends and trying to relieve the tension of joblessness