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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us (95236 Views)
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Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Obason22(m): 1:41pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
letskeeptalking:I believe u're one of those runs girl or baby mama that go about. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by liverpool72(m): 1:42pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
eyefordetails:pls oga show us the one u have married let's applaud u, yeyenatu 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by liverpool72(m): 1:44pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Belafonte:yeye likes 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by MyChoice1: 1:46pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
born2begreat: I agree with you. I hv a cousin sister that had 2 daughters with a man. She got pregnant and the man was forced to marry her to cover up. But after having the second daughter, the center could no longer hold, the maltreatment was so much that it was the church that funded her transportation back home to her aged mother. At home there was nothing but suffering, as God would hv it, my dad got a federal job for her as his aide. There were two of them he put like that. For them to hv something doing and cater for themselves and family to some extent. Even further their education to grow in the job. The one with two daughters got into a relationship with a divorcee with 3kids already. Meanwhile she was living with her daughters and would join the kids of the man to hers, she was catering for all of them ooo since they were almost age mates with hers. We all frowned and advised her against it but to no avail. Mind you the man is a gateman somewhere so he doesn't bring in much financially. She married him. Like play she sent the first daughter back to the village to her mum, later the second daughter was sent home too, now only the man and his kids are living with her. She had another baby with the man. The main reason of securing that job for her has been defeated because the main beneficiaries had been sidelined for a total stranger not even in the picture to come and enjoy. Most men come with marriage proposal just to deceive women.especially the working ones. 4 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by armadeo(m): 1:46pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
crackkhaus: Let me summarise this post. Beg him to agree or tell him to Bleep off. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by liverpool72(m): 1:47pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
janvier27:gud one there I only blame some weakling who go ahead to marry women that have had kids,never in my life. 4 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Favored4gud: 1:47pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
If he is 12years old and no relative wants him. You can look for a good boarding school and enroll him. This will give you the chance to visit your son and hopefully bond better with him. Vyvyanvyvy: |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Vyvyanvyvy: 1:52pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Gernny:Have already been paying rent for the house we are staying and why should I waste money again ? I have school fees and other bills to pay. my son should be with me , his father {my husband} and his siblings he doesn’t need to be living apart like an orphan when I’m alive and healthy 10 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by JONNYSPUTE(m): 1:53pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Madam,it's either you plead with your husband to accept your son or you separate from him an d stay with your children. Gudluck |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by samdaisi: 1:56pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
hello |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 1:57pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy:Sorry about that. In your next life don't give birth for different men. Call the attention of your pastor, beside how old is he? I could tell you that your siblings are angry because you had a child elsewhere before getting married. Beside, where's your first husband? Can't you contact him to take responsibility of his child? 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by QwarkdFerengi(m): 1:58pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy: Vyvyanvyvy:Madam, you shouldn't be tired if you are seeking for a solution. Reading your posts, I saw a pattern. Let me begin by saying the father of your son did an introduction. Are you sure no dowry were paid? Because this automatically makes those kids his even if another man raised them as you were the only one who left his family claiming you were being maltreated. So I guess you know the last location you left the family and you can go there to look for their whereabouts and possibly get their exact location except you decide not to. I say this because lots of females tend to alienate a dad from his kids thinking it's the right thing because you are obviously thinking on your own. Now this is the result of it all. You now stopped talking to your present husband because he disagrees with you? You are making the same mistakes all over and I guess you are impatient. Sorry to say that. You left your first inlaws custody because you claim they maltreated you. Why can't you bear it, raise your kids while their father abroad gets stable and start sending you funds? But you chose to leave. Now living with someone else with kids again and you are starting same cycle again because I guess your next decision is listening to stupid advices like you did in the past and moving out of your current home because you don't want to be patient. The best thing for you to do is locate your previous inlaws. Don't say you don't know where they are. You do. Take the boy to them because if you think you taking those kids away is to punish the family, you are making a big mistake. You are punishing those kids and ruining their lives with your selfishness and blaming it on your current husband who might have asked you to return those kids but you are being stubborn thinking you can manipulate him. Go and return those kids so they can be properly taken care of and you should focus on your present husband and make your home a happy one. 2 Likes
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Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by oodua1stson: 1:59pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy:this is the problem with your kind. You're super deluded and can only see things from your narrow angle. You can love someone and still choose to distance yourself from them. It doesn't mean you hate the person, it means you don't want their toxicity in your life. Deal with the truth! Your son is wild a d rogue. A child who steals is not the kind of child to raise alongside one's kids. And your arrogance is baffling. Maybe and maybe that's why you're a single mother of 2 b4. What do you mean by you did not force him? Lol perhaps you are blind to your own reality. If truly you did not force him to marry you why not leave him now and go raise your thieving son by yourself? Nonsense 4 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Amumaigwe: 2:01pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Davash222: Feminist, na them. He is likely shutting the ex out of his children lives in to spite him, yet expect another man to perform the roles he is preventing her children's daddy from performing. 3 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by AreaFada2: 2:01pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Belafonte:Look, I always warn men to beware of marrying a woman with kids already. It's a BIG and Thankless job. Just loving kids is not enough. Especially young kids. Worse if the woman is divorced. Even if widowed, still difficult. From 90% of such families I saw growing up. it's not encouraging at the end. The man ends up losing out. Do 99% of fatherly responsibility, the 1% you didn't do they will blame you for. Even if their biological dad could never have done 25% of it for them. A woman has two kids for a man and she has no contact with their dad. What kind of people have two kids together and do not communicate? A combination of a careless/irresponsible person and a vindictive person? Also beware of the emotional damage people previously suffered. It can be a baggage they are coming with. You are not a psychologist or therapist to heal them. It ruin your carefree life. "Love" is not enough when push comes to shove. Suddenly, people like Oyendidi are blaming a guy who's concerned about the friction that 12 years old boy could cause in his household. That's the truth even though he cannot tell his wife so. At some point if he tries to correct that boy more harshly, it will be thrown at him that it's because the boy is not his son. This man is not a hypocrite to grudgingly accept the boy while unhappy about it. OP should honestly try to know his fear. Can they take him to a boarding school for now? Any other way out? 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Dongabby(m): 2:04pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy: IN THAT CASE, SEND HIM TO A BOARDING SCHOOL ... ASAP 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:05pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Oyindidi:na him send her go born for outside. Beside, most of you ladies who had kids outside are very loyal to the core, just for them to get into another marriage, because they can't stay a year without sex. In her next life, she won't dare give birth to different men. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Amumaigwe: 2:05pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Oyindidi: Her son should be in his father's house. It does not stop at winning custody suit in the law court. She cannot eat your cake and have it. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by lepasharon(f): 2:06pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Oyindidi: What are you talking about? Is OP independent ? 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by EzeAmusu(m): 2:07pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy:I will advice,please if you are capable don't allow that boy to suffer.no matter what he is ur blood and your son.since he is 12 he should be in secondary school enrol him in a boarding house,get him a trusted guildian that should be monitoring him and that can always house him during the holiday period.....this too will pass away and keep begging your husband with time he will see reasons with you and accept the boy. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by QwarkdFerengi(m): 2:08pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Exactly what I said to her and if she likes she should listen to stupid advices just like she did before and break up with her current husband thinking she can do it all alone. They will only mislead you while you are on your own. She should take that boy to her first inlaws because she is pretending not to know where they live. She knows. She is the one ruining that boys life Amumaigwe: 3 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Solatium(m): 2:09pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy: The tone of this reply shows you are arrogant,I don't need to be present at your discussion to know that your manner of presentation was bossy. That Man did the right thing by refusing to let that innocent boy stay away. You don't impose your wish on others, Pleading and persuade your husband if you want result. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:09pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Richy4:Bro it a Favour. Taking care of another man's child when he's not financially buoyant, you think it easy? Who will marry second hand woman, unless the man has a kid elsewhere, then the marriage will be in a state of equilibrium. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by xendra: 2:09pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Davash222:ah! Nigerian men, if the reverse was the case you would be dragging women for not wanting their husbands family....but God wee punish u people sha 5 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by apatheticme(f): 2:11pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy: I really feel for your son and you. It's not your fault u are caught in between caring for ur children and husband. However ur Son needs you now than ever. He may end up hating you eventually if you can't risk all for him right now. It is heartbreaking right now but the truth is you have to take care of all your children. Get him to go to boarding house, and only come home during break. Maybe your husband will accept that option. Meanwhile, pray, there's nothing prayers cannot achieve God be with you |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by AreaFada2: 2:12pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Davash222: Lol. Don't be surprised if it was the man who funded the shop from which she says she pays 70% of the bill. ![]() ![]() Women are just not cut out to contribute more to the household financially. If you like pay for her education, train, open shop for her, same thing. To bring a difficult child you do not have the freedom to discipline like your own biological son is a nightmare. For any self-respecting man. I saw it around my neighbourhood growing up. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Amumaigwe: 2:12pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
letskeeptalking: @Bolded This mentality may be why you are still single. Inninit? 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Nobody: 2:13pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy:that's a lie. Having two kids for your former husband, you seems not to know the family of your husband? Or where you not legally marry, even though. You should know his grandmother, his sisters. Facebook is available, search for his family. Stop the lies here. Probably your former husband's family dislike you because of your bad character. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Jman06(m): 2:14pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
drnoel:"Adult " we have seen you. It is still my opinion that any man that decides to carry another man's baggage in the name of marrying a single mother is a shameless simp who settled for less because he couldn't get a better deal. 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by KingSatan: 2:14pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
AreaFada2: You are so right. I have created a thread on my opinion. Check it out = https://www.nairaland.com/5733643/no-man-should-encouraged-marry 2 Likes |
Re: My Husband Doesn’t Want My Son To Come And Stay With Us by Godiloveu(f): 2:15pm On Mar 13, 2020 |
Vyvyanvyvy: Madam find a way to keep appealing to your husband and put it in prayers too. So many ppl will tell u different things mostly negative/positive but my advice is u know ur hubby , u know ur son , u need dem both so keep talking to ur hubby so u can bring ur son to stay with u. Am glad I had a good step dad u willfully took me in when he married my mom infact wanted to adopt me but my mom refuse saying she cannot give another man's child to another taking me in was kind enough for her, my step siblings were the nay sayers but now thank God they are bless through me (It is the Lord's doing not my power o). I also know a family the man refuses his step children to stay with his family these children became bad fruits but for God intervention they are now in good places while the wife is in the US living there with some of her children. Madam God will continue to bless your business and ur family but bring ur child in. Look for ppl that can appeal to ur hubby he will change his mind along the line ...provided u talk to him calmly and make him see reasons, not being boastful about how u maintain the home to his face. May God help u 1 Like |
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