Young woman, complaining about his siblings and co is one major mistake you want to put yourself into. This is a family that do things together, lives together and plan together. So don't even try to put asunder cos you won't succeed. If you aren't comfortable with such united family, please go your way now. He may be delaying the union cos of your mood towards his family. The earlier you disengage yourself, the better for you

Okay.... If get this very well, you want him to throw his family out and marry you immediately because you're wearing a ring.

Menh.... You're too young for the word I wanted to vomit here... But Get sense!

The poor guy have a lot of responsibilities, and his family depends on him. You want him to kick them out because of what exactly? If you can't help him sort himself abeg clear road. Nonsense! haba women self!

You've not heard of coronavirus and the campaign to stay at home?

Your period shouldn't be a reason for marriage to come up immediately, you should take responsibility for it.

Back to the case, I can observe your fiancé seems a responsible man. He feels obliged to cater for his family, that's cool.

You should know of our type of society, the socioeconomic issues and others.

Nevertheless, since you watching time on your own side, I suggest your talk to your fiancé, analyse the financial needs (if that is the problem) also emotional impediments, have a clear picture of things from your conversation with him (noting timeline of thing's from the discussion).

Then decide.

NextD18:
Give him money to rent another apartment if you can't cope with him and his family in the same building.

Or better still, give him money for wedding expenses if you can't wait or exercise some patients till he's ready for wedding!

You are 24!
-Do you work?
-Are you a student?
-Are you learning any skill?
-Do you have any meaningful thing to boast of?

Who and what are you exactly to the society and what exactly are you impacting in his life to warrant such thoughts of pressurizing him into sending his families out and marrying you as soon as possible!!

Smh! Keep fvckin him with reckless abandon, until you get pregnant, then will you understand the gravity of your fvckery!!

No use your head now wey you young!
Kpata kpata you'll turn to a single mother and a feminist wannabe, nothing go still change! Men go still dey ball!
Ask single mothers and feminist wannabes how they ended up and if anything changed in their lives after ranting and hating on men.

no better way to state it...
I dash one million billion sir

HelloHolla:


He moved out once, but they came visiting and saw there were vacant rooms, before we knew what was happening, they'd moved IN with him fully cause the former house rent expired, now, he thinks I'm trying to separate him from his family.

Sister take drugs and flush anything there before it germinates, then call off that stupid relationship once and for all except you want to enter an already stressed family. A house whereby men that are still squatting already have live in partners on the expenses of others, is not a good family to marry into. Let nobody guilt trap you, you deserve better, he won't change, he will only grow worse.

HelloHolla:


Thank you for the contribution, I accepted his ring because I thought he was going to "change" and perhaps, start living on his own, obviously, he doesn't look like he's moving anywhere, he has chased off other eligible suitors off me.

mix alabukun in sprite and drink, so as to stop his seed from taking root. Don't, if you wanna continue such life. But better don't come here complaining when shit hit d fan. You still got time to make things right.

I feel he's using the ring to tie you down, my dear.
no serious guy should delay for that long before finalizing it.

you have the right to be desperate because he has delayed sealing the deal. you have the total right to be worried cos you need to know your fate with him.


if you feel you can't hold on any longer, pls, go and settle with him and move on with your life if you already have suitors to choose from.

as someone already said, if pregnancy never enter am. you are good to go.



alternatively, discuss with him about it.

Giving a girl ring nowadays is the surest way to get into her Gates of heaven. Non stop.

I am sure he is going in and out without recourse and questioning, meanwhile distracting your future life partner from coming in

Call off d engagement gurl, cut ur losses and move. The guy is far from being ready to settle down.

Why are you so pained??

UyaiIncomparabl:


The ilks who liked your post are obviously your flocks. I see how much they've influenced you since you've dated quality women.

I don't have anything to say to you, but I'll rather just hope that I never come across men like you in my life.

You're a total waste of time.

HelloHolla:



He tried helping but they usually end up squandering the money on irrelevances, mostly virtual games.

na to slap you dey hungry me . This girl you well so? So you are seeing fire with your krokro eyes you want to jump inside .


RUN ! What did I say ? RUN!


Now as for the pregnancy suspicion , go and boil blended ginger for 10 mins and add teem soda drink .

rain21:
lol.., @24 you act desperately
I'm sure you must have other serious suitors coming your way but you prefer to stick with a guy who is not yet even sure of himself.

it's clear he's playing you and you still stick your ass there for 5 good years!!

return his ring and move on with your life, hope you are not already pregnant sha

Nothing is really as it seems

nuele:
Your period shouldn't be a reason for marriage to come up immediately, you should take responsibility for it.

Back to the case, I can observe your fiancé seems a responsible man. He feels obliged to cater for his family, that's cool.

You should know of our type of society, the socioeconomic issues and others.

Nevertheless, since you watching time on your own side, I suggest your talk to your fiancé, analyse the financial needs (if that is the problem) also emotional impediments, have a clear picture of things from your conversation with him (noting timeline of thing's from the discussion).

Then decide.

Everyone wants a nuclear family not community one with no privacy

Pls hold that ring were it well well course it feet your finger.

HelloHolla:
Good evening everyone, I've been a guest for quite a while, created an account cause I need advice from the audience.

How long should an engagement ring be worn for? I've been engaged since last year May (dated for 4yrs), my Fiance hasn't talked about proceeding to do introduction or marriage, it's like he just proposed to me because he felt like.

This man has refused to be on his own, his Grandma and 5 siblings (younger and older) live with him and he takes responsibility for them all, two of his siblings living with him also have their partners living with them. It's only a 3 bedroom flat. I feel like quitting the whole thing cause I don't feel comfortable going to his house. When I do, he wants me to cook for everyone which gets me strained.

With the look of things, he has no plans of moving out for them cause he rented the apartment, neither do they have intentions of moving out on their own, it's more like a family house. My period is two days late and I'm scared to the marrow.

Please advice me on what to do cause I can't live with him if they're still there after marriage, he's not even talking about marriage, I've not asked him yet so as not to sound desperate but why propose if you don't have plans of doing the next thing after a max of 6 months?

He's 31 and I'm 24

Thanks.

Once u have dated a guy for 2/3 years max with no clear and confirmed direction in sight my sis u are officially single.

If he likes let him give u five rings like thanos. U best start having or considering other guys around you ASAP.

Then continue to wear the ring

UBGGA:
You're just 24!

Read. Travel. Build a career. Start a company.

Girl, live first, really live, before thinking marriage.

What of if she has done all these things you listed?

HelloHolla:
Good evening everyone, I've been a guest for quite a while, created an account cause I need advice from the audience.

How long should an engagement ring be worn for? I've been engaged since last year May (dated for 4yrs), my Fiance hasn't talked about proceeding to do introduction or marriage, it's like he just proposed to me because he felt like.

This man has refused to be on his own, his Grandma and 5 siblings (younger and older) live with him and he takes responsibility for them all, two of his siblings living with him also have their partners living with them. It's only a 3 bedroom flat. I feel like quitting the whole thing cause I don't feel comfortable going to his house. When I do, he wants me to cook for everyone which gets me strained.

With the look of things, he has no plans of moving out for them cause he rented the apartment, neither do they have intentions of moving out on their own, it's more like a family house. My period is two days late and I'm scared to the marrow.

Please advice me on what to do cause I can't live with him if they're still there after marriage, he's not even talking about marriage, I've not asked him yet so as not to sound desperate but why propose if you don't have plans of doing the next thing after a max of 6 months?

He's 31 and I'm 24

Thanks.

Lord of the rings is sight you

NextD18:
Give him money to rent another apartment if you can't cope with him and his family in the same building.

Or better still, give him money for wedding expenses if you can't wait or exercise some patients till he's ready for wedding!

You are 24!
-Do you work?
-Are you a student?
-Are you learning any skill?
-Do you have any meaningful thing to boast of?

Who and what are you exactly to the society and what exactly are you impacting in his life to warrant such thoughts of pressurizing him into sending his families out and marrying you as soon as possible!!

Smh! Keep fvckin him with reckless abandon, until you get pregnant, then will you understand the gravity of your fvckery!!

No use your head now wey you young!
Kpata kpata you'll turn to a single mother and a feminist wannabe, nothing go still change! Men go still dey ball!
Ask single mothers and feminist wannabes how they ended up and if anything changed in their lives after ranting and hating on men.

This guy self you no get chill oo

jayson87:
Giving a girl ring nowadays is the surest way to get into her Gates of heaven. Non stop.

I am sure he is going in and out without recourse and questioning, meanwhile distracting your future life partner from coming in

men have plenty cunning senses when it comes to getting to the promise land.


u probably might be right here. cos I no trust u guys of nowadays.





I hail u, bro.

HelloHolla:



He tried helping but they usually end up squandering the money on irrelevances, mostly virtual games.

U need to face reality....the guy is trying, I seriously salute him....they are his family, you can’t flip him like a switch and stop him from taking care of them, even if he doesn’t want to by now he’s already addicted to caring for them..

If ur guy isnt rich enuf to rent another place for himself...and still pay the rent of the folks....
u need to walk away now...cos the best u will get from him is marrying in that house where the whole crew will be hearing u moan at 11:30pm...:

I understand your plight, is not that he's not financially fit for the marriage but family had takeover his own life. he's a selfless man like me, this selflessness almost rendered me useless


these people he's helping will one day start their own family then what will be of him if he lose you. as people have suggested, talk to him in a way he won't feel like you hate his people



he can still help them and continue with the plan with you. 1yr engagement ring is another burden of thinking. talking it out with him in a modest way can reshape things

1. From your statement, you failed to impressed the family you intend marrying into because they live together. This can be the only reason why he refused to go further.

2. If after what you have observed you still went ahead having unprotected sex with him, you must bear the consequences.

Sit down and discuss in realities and frankly, if he is still interested let him tell you.

grossintel:
The poor guy have a lot of responsibilities, and his family depends on him. You want him to kick them out because of what exactly? If you can't help him sort himself abeg clear road. Nonsense! haba women self!

Funny enough you can see how her fellow women are supporting her like seriously,
Because she is wearing ring, the young man should throw away his family to marry her so that she will make life miserable for him.

HelloHolla:
Good evening everyone, I've been a guest for quite a while, created an account cause I need advice from the audience.

How long should an engagement ring be worn for? I've been engaged since last year May (dated for 4yrs), my Fiance hasn't talked about proceeding to do introduction or marriage, it's like he just proposed to me because he felt like.

This man has refused to be on his own, his Grandma and 5 siblings (younger and older) live with him and he takes responsibility for them all, two of his siblings living with him also have their partners living with them. It's only a 3 bedroom flat. I feel like quitting the whole thing cause I don't feel comfortable going to his house. When I do, he wants me to cook for everyone which gets me strained.

With the look of things, he has no plans of moving out for them cause he rented the apartment, neither do they have intentions of moving out on their own, it's more like a family house. My period is two days late and I'm scared to the marrow.

Please advice me on what to do cause I can't live with him if they're still there after marriage, he's not even talking about marriage, I've not asked him yet so as not to sound desperate but why propose if you don't have plans of doing the next thing after a max of 6 months?

He's 31 and I'm 24

Thanks.

His using that ring to quarantine you ���

HelloHolla:
Good evening everyone, I've been a guest for quite a while, created an account cause I need advice from the audience.

How long should an engagement ring be worn for? I've been engaged since last year May (dated for 4yrs), my Fiance hasn't talked about proceeding to do introduction or marriage, it's like he just proposed to me because he felt like.

This man has refused to be on his own, his Grandma and 5 siblings (younger and older) live with him and he takes responsibility for them all, two of his siblings living with him also have their partners living with them. It's only a 3 bedroom flat. I feel like quitting the whole thing cause I don't feel comfortable going to his house. When I do, he wants me to cook for everyone which gets me strained.

With the look of things, he has no plans of moving out for them cause he rented the apartment, neither do they have intentions of moving out on their own, it's more like a family house. My period is two days late and I'm scared to the marrow.

Please advice me on what to do cause I can't live with him if they're still there after marriage, he's not even talking about marriage, I've not asked him yet so as not to sound desperate but why propose if you don't have plans of doing the next thing after a max of 6 months?

He's 31 and I'm 24

Thanks.

The guy in question is not ready for marriage in the next five years

These are my reasons

He rented am apartment that harbours every members of his family, he can't force them out and he can't afford to go get a private one for his personal accommodation

His siblings are benefiting from his charity and they are staying with him to get the balance they need to stand

You will have to live in that same house with him if he should marry you and it means you will have to be unhappy with it where as he sees nothing wrong with it

He engaged you because he knows that you guys have been dating for four years now and you are looking forward to his engagement, but bear in mind that he can't move a step beyond that because he doesn't have the ability to start a family when his siblings are yet to get there ground

He doesn't even have the money for the marriage and he wants you to keep marking time the way he is marking time and as you do that with him, you are on your own

As you keep living with them, your money, energy, sacrifice are going into the family yet no reward for it

My advice, prepare your mind to quit the relationship as that's the only way to move on with your future

Meet him, remove the ring and give it to him, tell him you have tried so far waiting for him to seal the relationship but from the look of things, he is not prepared and you have to move on

If he pleads with you to bear with him, tell him you will bear with him but the ring have to be removed from your finger so that your hand will be free

If he says he is ready, tell him to give you time, but make sure you give him the ring back to his palm and don't receive it back

Before you do this, be prepared emotionally so that you don't have a heart break

HelloHolla:
Good evening everyone, I've been a guest for quite a while, created an account cause I need advice from the audience.

How long should an engagement ring be worn for? I've been engaged since last year May (dated for 4yrs), my Fiance hasn't talked about proceeding to do introduction or marriage, it's like he just proposed to me because he felt like.

This man has refused to be on his own, his Grandma and 5 siblings (younger and older) live with him and he takes responsibility for them all, two of his siblings living with him also have their partners living with them. It's only a 3 bedroom flat. I feel like quitting the whole thing cause I don't feel comfortable going to his house. When I do, he wants me to cook for everyone which gets me strained.

With the look of things, he has no plans of moving out for them cause he rented the apartment, neither do they have intentions of moving out on their own, it's more like a family house. My period is two days late and I'm scared to the marrow.

Please advice me on what to do cause I can't live with him if they're still there after marriage, he's not even talking about marriage, I've not asked him yet so as not to sound desperate but why propose if you don't have plans of doing the next thing after a max of 6 months?

He's 31 and I'm 24

Thanks.

Talk to him about it,
Don't listen to every advice you read on nairaland.

Qadaffi2idiamin:
Okay.... If get this very well, you want him to throw his family out and marry you immediately because you're wearing a ring.

Menh.... You're too young for the word I wanted to vomit here... But Get sense!

No, don't judge her that way. Why should two of her boyfriend siblings be dependent on him and still have live in lovers, it makes no sense to me. I can't accommodate you then you bring your girl friend along. Besides she said he had given them money to start up their lives but instead squanders it on video games probably betting. The only siblings I can take care of are those in University I pay there fees and rent, apart from that, you are strictly on your own. You can never grow big if responsibility outweigh income.