Good evening,I'm a guy that posted that was sexually abused...and my parents are not helping me...no one is...i feel used , useless and worthless...i am depressed..i'm 20 ....i can't bear it any longer...i almost committed suicide...God saved me o... I've decided to leave home..i'm going far away..i play d piano..how wld i start up ,pls advice me..thank u..nairalanders....i'm tired of everything...help please..

You have given too much power to that extremely bad event of your life and have let it become a deciding factor of your worth in life.

Sometimes, it's hard for others to fully understand the pain you're going through so they might find it frustrating that their little efforts are not getting thru to you and may give up.... But jusy because others have given up on you doesn't mean you should give up on your self. Try to see a counselor, or someone you can talk to freely.

You play the piano...beautiful! Can you compose a victory song for yourself? To be your balm when you hurt.

Also, remember how it was when you started learning to play the piano? You learnt notes and when on to triads and then other full chords!

Try to apply same process to your life dear... One note at a time, till you find yourself again.

Never give an abuser the POWER OVER YOUR LIFE. You're a Survivor!

Stephenomozzy:

If u want me to post how I was abused. I will. ..
Just pls help

Hey... You don't have to recount your experience again on a public forum... I can't say i understand what you went thru, but I can say this.... YOU CAN FIND MEANING AGAIN.... just take it easy on yourself....

Leaving home to fend for yourself will further expose you to more danger considering your young age.

Your family may have betrayed your trust but you should learn to forgive them or at least use whatever platform they provide you in the interim.

Develop yourself, it’s important. Building a future for yourself at your young age and educational qualification will require all the mental toughness, goodwill and luck there is.

Also pray, pray, pray. God is sovereign over everything and He alone can help you chart the course of your life.

It is well bro. God be with you

Stephenomozzy:


You have given too much power to that extremely bad event of your life and have let it become a deciding factor of your worth in life.

Sometimes, it's hard for others to fully understand the pain you're going through so they might find it frustrating that their little efforts are not getting thru to you and may give up.... But jusy because others have given up on you doesn't mean you should give up on your self. Try to see a counselor, or someone you can talk to freely.

You play the piano...beautiful! Can you compose a victory song for yourself? To be your balm when you hurt.

Also, remember how it was when you started learning to play the piano? You learnt notes and when on to triads and then other full chords!

Try to apply same process to your life dear... One note at a time, till you find yourself again.

Never give an abuser the POWER OVER YOUR LIFE. You're a Survivor!

I want to leave..i'm serious..i know what I'm saying bro

brodalikeme:
Leaving home to fend for yourself will further expose you to more danger considering your young age.

Your family may have betrayed your trust but you should learn to forgive them or at least use whatever platform they provide you in the interim.

Develop yourself, it’s important. Building a future for yourself at your young age and educational qualification will require all the mental toughness, goodwill and luck there is.

Also pray, pray, pray. God is sovereign over everything and He alone can help you chart the course of your life.

It is well bro. God be with you

What I passed through. Those my parents. Were not there for me. Nobody to talk to. I was threatened that they hurt me if talk...for 11 years I kept it to myself...told them last year still yet no emotional support...telling me his life history...if he talked to me earlier as his first son...will I hVe passed through such. D same said he wld slap me if I said anything again...imagine.......i want to leave home...i'm set to...their own is just chores..greet them...do that do this..they sent me to school...not d course I want sef....i want to leave...before I hurt someone....just advice wat I should do to survive.

Stephenomozzy:
Hey... You don't have to recount your experience again on a public forum... I can't say i understand what you went thru, but I can say this.... YOU CAN'T FIND MEANING AGAIN.... just take it easy on yourself....

I don't understand..pls explain better

Leaving home without adequate resources will further deepen you into depressive thoughts, plus now that the world is on lock down, there's not much by way of being far away you can go.

Turn out the negative vibes that you may be receiving from your family, maybe their words and actions are reopening your scars, but you can do better.

Remember, the pain you're feeling now is not environmental, it is mostly psychological. You can't run away from your mind...embrace the pain, but don't let it define you. It's a tough world out there already.. don't make it harder for your self

Pheurly2:



I don't understand..pls explain better

Sorry I meant YOU CAN FIND MEANING AGAIN

[quote author=Stephenomozzy post=88965200]Leaving home without adequate resources will further deepen you into depressive thoughts, plus now that the world is on lock down, there's not much by way of being far away you can go.

Turn out the negative vibes that you may be receiving from your family, maybe their words and actions are reopening your scars, but you can do better.

Remember, the pain you're feeling now is not environmental, it is mostly psychological. You can't run away from your mind...embrace the pain, but don't let it define you. It's a tough world out there already.. don't make it harder for your self



[b]LOCKDOWN HAS BEEN EASED MAN..i just want to... ..you're mKing cry.... I'm very emotional...i wanna leave

[quote author=Pheurly2 post=88965446][/quote]

H..

I can't advice you to leave the house and try to survive on your own under harsh conditions.....Your mind is still clouded with pain

Stephenomozzy:


I can't advice you to leave the house and try to survive on your own under harsh conditions.....Your mind is still clouded with pain

Hnnnm...if u are here seeing me...they just want everything done by force....their own alone. .pls is food , house, school fees enough. For bringing up child. There are most times I choose not eat,I nor die...i sleep without clothes....is it enough for bringing up a child. ?

Pheurly2:



Hnnnm...if u are here seeing me...they just want everything done by force....their own alone. .pls is food , house, school fees enough. For bringing up child. There are most times I choose not eat,I nor die...i sleep without clothes....is it enough for bringing up a child. ?

You have given so much power to the painful memory.

Life is not fair, so be fair to yourself. There are people who have parents who give even less care about their children. It doesn't mean that such kids can't grow out....you just have to take things easy.

Even if they're not there for you, but they still provide certain things that the cold hands of the world out there may not provide for you....take your mind off the inconvenience, clear your head and you'll be able to think better and forge ahead when the time comes

Stephenomozzy:
Hey... You don't have to recount your experience again on a public forum... I can't say i understand what you went thru, but I can say this.... YOU CAN FIND MEANING AGAIN.... just take it easy on yourself....

lucidly said, the op should also read Victor Frankl's "Man search for meaning" it helps alot.

sageb:
lucidly said, the op should also read Victor Frankl's "Man search for meaning" it helps alot.

Hmmmm

Nobody talks to me...no friends....lonely...stay in a room all day...i feel I'm turning to a different person...i mean bad. D more I stay iinor...d more I change....funny part..dad is a minister....

Pheurly2:
Nobody talks to me...no friends....lonely...stay in a room all day...i feel I'm turning to a different person...i mean bad. D more I stay iinor...d more I change....funny part..dad is a minister....

Pain has eaten deep..i feel it

Pheurly2

Just close your eyes, and breathe.

Stephenomozzy:
Pheurly2

Just close your eyes, and breathe.

Normal

This is painful, what is your mother saying?

Graxie:
This is painful, what is your mother saying?

Hmmm, forget matter o..nothing

Pheurly2:
Good evening,I'm a guy that posted that was sexually abused...and my parents are not helping me...no one is...i feel used , useless and worthless...i am depressed..i'm 20 ....i can't bear it any longer...i almost committed suicide...God saved me o... I've decided to leave home..i'm going far away..i play d piano..how wld i start up ,pls advice me..thank u..nairalanders....i'm tired of everything...help please..

You need someone to listen to you. Send me PM by tomorrow.

Pheurly2:
Good evening,I'm a guy that posted that was sexually abused...and my parents are not helping me...no one is...i feel used , useless and worthless...i am depressed..i'm 20 ....i can't bear it any longer...i almost committed suicide...God saved me o... I've decided to leave home..i'm going far away..i play d piano..how wld i start up ,pls advice me..thank u..nairalanders....i'm tired of everything...help please..

What is really the problem

As a guy you were sexualy abused.

What else

You want to take your life

To where if I may ask

Tell us more about yourself and your relationship with your family

Pheurly2:



Hmmm, forget matter o..nothing

Unfortunately this neglect and abuse will only increase with the way our society is shaping up to be and parents gotta go hustle together leaving their kids to their own care, vulnerable of abuse and violation. Mothers too stressed out from work to notice things amiss about their kids, fathers also stressed out from work and distanced from their kids... No real connection to their kids in most cases. These kids may grow up bitter, disjointed, hurt and confused.

I just pray the family finds a balance in all this.

Hmmmm....

You are 20yrs now and in the university, you need to gather yourself together and face your future head-on. As an adult, you are lucky to still have your parents paying your school fees, housing you, feeding you, etc. Please stop allowing what happened to you as a kid to control your adulthood. I will suggest that you calm down, concentrate on your studies, finish and leave peacefully. If you do not want to stay at home again, you could stay off campus and refuse to leave even during holidays.

Take control of your life deliberately please... May God help you.