GodPunishBiafra:
I just hate reading people apologizing for their so-called typos or wrong grammar and sentence.

Is English your mother tongue?

How may Oyinbo sabi speak and write Yoruba, Igbo or Hausa?

I can imagine the colour of your heart....


To imagine 59 people "liked" this post is horrible

Your mum basically has a big problem.
Deeper Life is not het problem.

I wasn't born but raised Deeper Life and my family is a lovely one, relates well with all family and neighbors, regardless of religion affiliation.

Your parents are the type that bring disgrace and disrepute to the church and the body of christ.

I as a member of the church is ashamed of them.

May God grant them genuine salvation, peace with God and peace with themselves.

by Ope88

Are you really sure you're same mother and father?

Your sister's husband kept quiet hearing his wife's kid brother beat his wife up?. That man is a weakling. Not even my wife's senior brother will do that to my wife and kids and get away with it. The men married to you and your sisters are d one to end d nonsense from that tout of a boy. The three of them should arrange a day with good koboko and catch him unaware and treat his fuckup, flog him till he pass out, and he will never misbehave again. Beating your sister was a good opportunity to treat his madness. The in-laws should mobilise and taim d idiot. He can not do anything to harm any of you after d beating, give him stern warning.

Sad but you guys need to pray for your dad and if possible, let him stay with you girls for a while before deciding on what next to do. Calling his siblings would only aggravate things since they don't have any love for him. Also for you and your siblings protection, keep in house any squabbles you may have. Don't invite awon aye into your issues. God is with you all.

Ope88:
Please don't read and pass, also Pardon all my typo, I'm typing out of duress.

I am from a family of six, 3 girls, 1 boy including my parents.
I had a horrible childhood experience, My Mum (no thanks to her) was something I can't quantify, I can't start writing every of the things she did and I can't say If the religion she practiced contributed largely to the devilish attitude she put up while growing up.

My mum has no good record anywhere, in the church, with the neighbours, with her siblings, we the children, her in laws and even at work, She was always at war with people, if she dreams that someone was trying to attack her in the dream, if she sees the person the following day, she was ready to attack the person.

Also, she would curse her children at any slightest provocation and leave only my brother out(last born and spoilt), She doesn't have any good relationship with her siblings and won't allow my dad visit his family member, I remembered them (Mum and dad) always saying this (don't be unequally yoked together with unbelievers). To them anyone who isn't a Christian (deeper life) is not supposed to be associated with.. My dad on countless occasion will call his mum a witch just because she was a Muslim and one of the oloyes of allasalatu(Muslims will understand this) and had nothing to do with his family members.

This went on and on like this until my elder sister moved out of the house and in the process of trying to find her feet, she got pregnant and my mom practically tormented her life, she later got married to the man, and for that act alone, she's always at logger heads with my sister and her husband..

Later, I got married and then my younger sister followed suit, leaving my dad, herself and my younger brother (whom I have disowned).

Ever since the three of us got happily married, and left the home, my dad slipped into severe depression. Although he has been depressed given lots of things he encountered, job loss, no social interaction, unforgiveness amongst others, it became severe when all his female children left, then from severe depressgion, he started having mental issues, he would wake up and leave the house talking to himself, or start preaching and going out of point with anyone he finds on the street, sometimes he would leave and come home at night, my younger brother who is supposed to comfort and help him, treats him with disdain, my mum who is supposed to check mate his excesses would leave him to his folly and now he has started standing up to her and everyone else in the house..

At 26, he doesn't know his bearing and obviously we have been seeing signs of him wanting to inherit the houses my father built in the same compound.. (and we have noticed that my mum has been making him understand that every of the property belongs to him).

The last straw which broke the camel's back happened one week ago, my elder sister ( who is 9 year older than him) took advantage of the lockdown and visited my father, he is usually exited when we are around him whc helps his severe moodiness. There and then an argument broke out between my sister and my brother, she asked why my brother was insulting our mum for an action that happened in the compound, he beat my sister up and her three children and boasted that, the rest of us (my sister and I) dare not do anything and that by the way we must stop coming to the house, that if he sees any of us He will beat us up, My mum who was supposed to resolve the matter started blaming my sister, asking her why she always love to come visiting, that she's supposed to be in her husband's house or father in laws place and immediately called her hubby to come pick her.

Its been one week my sister left for her house, my daddy who enjoyed her company when she was present started misbehaving again at home. He started roaming, he started cursing everyone.

The reason I'm writing is this, my dad is no where to be found, he left the house yesterday Friday 15th May 2020 and was last seen in ITAMAGA IKORODU, we keep trying his number but he is not picking and now his number is switched off, I'm sure he is still wandering about.

My sisters and I have decided that even when he is found(by God's grace) we do not what him to go back living with my mum and brother.

What other alternatives do we have to care for him, as his own siblings are not happy with him either for abandoning them and their mum (his own mum),, when they needed him the most..


I AM SO SORRY FOR THE LONG POST.. PLEASE HELP ME.



Modified..... My dad has been found today Sunday, 17th May 2020, my sweet mother (elder sister) found her, she has been on her feet since he went missing, luckily he was found but in a terrible state, I saw him via video calls and I wept, he can't recognize even my sister again, and just muttering some words we don't understand, he closes his eyes while saying this and asked everyone to go and leave him, he looks so faint and weak and would not leave where he his...My sister has called his siblings and she's waiting for the next line of ACTION from them.

I'll keep updating the house with reports from our end..

Ope88:
Please don't read and pass, also Pardon all my typo, I'm typing out of duress.

I am from a family of six, 3 girls, 1 boy including my parents.
I had a horrible childhood experience, My Mum (no thanks to her) was something I can't quantify, I can't start writing every of the things she did and I can't say If the religion she practiced contributed largely to the devilish attitude she put up while growing up.

My mum has no good record anywhere, in the church, with the neighbours, with her siblings, we the children, her in laws and even at work, She was always at war with people, if she dreams that someone was trying to attack her in the dream, if she sees the person the following day, she was ready to attack the person.

Also, she would curse her children at any slightest provocation and leave only my brother out(last born and spoilt), She doesn't have any good relationship with her siblings and won't allow my dad visit his family member, I remembered them (Mum and dad) always saying this (don't be unequally yoked together with unbelievers). To them anyone who isn't a Christian (deeper life) is not supposed to be associated with.. My dad on countless occasion will call his mum a witch just because she was a Muslim and one of the oloyes of allasalatu(Muslims will understand this) and had nothing to do with his family members.

This went on and on like this until my elder sister moved out of the house and in the process of trying to find her feet, she got pregnant and my mom practically tormented her life, she later got married to the man, and for that act alone, she's always at logger heads with my sister and her husband..

Later, I got married and then my younger sister followed suit, leaving my dad, herself and my younger brother (whom I have disowned).

Ever since the three of us got happily married, and left the home, my dad slipped into severe depression. Although he has been depressed given lots of things he encountered, job loss, no social interaction, unforgiveness amongst others, it became severe when all his female children left, then from severe depressgion, he started having mental issues, he would wake up and leave the house talking to himself, or start preaching and going out of point with anyone he finds on the street, sometimes he would leave and come home at night, my younger brother who is supposed to comfort and help him, treats him with disdain, my mum who is supposed to check mate his excesses would leave him to his folly and now he has started standing up to her and everyone else in the house..

At 26, he doesn't know his bearing and obviously we have been seeing signs of him wanting to inherit the houses my father built in the same compound.. (and we have noticed that my mum has been making him understand that every of the property belongs to him).

The last straw which broke the camel's back happened one week ago, my elder sister ( who is 9 year older than him) took advantage of the lockdown and visited my father, he is usually exited when we are around him whc helps his severe moodiness. There and then an argument broke out between my sister and my brother, she asked why my brother was insulting our mum for an action that happened in the compound, he beat my sister up and her three children and boasted that, the rest of us (my sister and I) dare not do anything and that by the way we must stop coming to the house, that if he sees any of us He will beat us up, My mum who was supposed to resolve the matter started blaming my sister, asking her why she always love to come visiting, that she's supposed to be in her husband's house or father in laws place and immediately called her hubby to come pick her.

Its been one week my sister left for her house, my daddy who enjoyed her company when she was present started misbehaving again at home. He started roaming, he started cursing everyone.

The reason I'm writing is this, my dad is no where to be found, he left the house yesterday Friday 15th May 2020 and was last seen in ITAMAGA IKORODU, we keep trying his number but he is not picking and now his number is switched off, I'm sure he is still wandering about.

My sisters and I have decided that even when he is found(by God's grace) we do not what him to go back living with my mum and brother.

What other alternatives do we have to care for him, as his own siblings are not happy with him either for abandoning them and their mum (his own mum),, when they needed him the most..


I AM SO SORRY FOR THE LONG POST.. PLEASE HELP ME.



Modified..... My dad has been found today Sunday, 17th May 2020, my sweet mother (elder sister) found her, she has been on her feet since he went missing, luckily he was found but in a terrible state, I saw him via video calls and I wept, he can't recognize even my sister again, and just muttering some words we don't understand, he closes his eyes while saying this and asked everyone to go and leave him, he looks so faint and weak and would not leave where he his...My sister has called his siblings and she's waiting for the next line of ACTION from them.

I'll keep updating the house with reports from our end..

U said u dad abandoned his family( parents and siblings) cos he was a Christian( deeper life) to be precise so during all this family and health problems what has the church he so much adored and followed do to takecare of his wellbeing mentally and spiritually??

How come the church has also abandoned him? So who are his support system besides u gals and ur irresponsible mum?

The way we practice Christianity is quite funny smtmes. How can the home be in so much chaos?? Ur younger brother was not guided properly. Ur mum is an responsible person.

All u can to is look after u dad, start from admitting him in a hospital to recuperate, then when he’s sound in mind and body he shud address the family in a meeting and sort out any pending issues.

You shall know the truth and the truth will set you free...be a Bible reading Christian not a zombie Christian.. pray for holy spirit to guide you..d fact dat you have relatives that are moslems doesn't mean u should desert them....I wonder how some Christians read and understand Bible... so sorry to say...so many Christians are zombie Christian honestly....

Bestinstinct:
Religion ruined the family. My grand dad would have lived longer if not for religion...Deeper Life in particular. They made him forfeit all he worked for. Told him all he made was via sin. OldMan didnt live long cos everything became sin to him. So, be practical and leave religion out of this. May you find your dad. Just take him in, you see that your brother eh.... Just ignore him. He will one day grow and if he doesn't, karma will visit him anyway. As for your mom, she needs help too. She's not fine. Report a case of missing person at the nearest station to his residence and post your dad's pics on online. Please keep us updated.

And not again, people blame their failures on the church. Pastor Kumuyi is on radio and internet every week, show us ONE message he has preached that support these accusations to the church.

People has personal issues, yes the church should and can help them. But stop blaming your misfortune on the church.

Is every mad man on the street a product of the church you so accuse?

People have problems in this world sha!

Ope88:


I am in Ogun state while he is in Lagos, I don't know how this will work.

What side at ogun

One of you ladies should find a way to get your dad to stay with you. Happiness could actually heal him. When your father gets back to normal, he has to make a move. He has to sell that house. That son is a fucktárd. Any threat he makes against you guys should be recorded on phone. He's heading to ruin. No doubt.

PrimadonnaO:



The consequences of having a badly raised child are GRAVE!

The consequences of having a home where a man is unable to intelligently wield his mantle as head of the home are GRAVE!

This situation seems intractable. Whatever comes to mind right now may only aggravate the situation.

You saw the mistakes your parents made with religion. You and your siblings, how’s your relationship with God?

The way I see it, you need fervent prayers. Whatever has gone wrong with your younger brother and mother, y’all have to pray it doesn’t visit and disrupt your new homes.

But while on that, report your father’s disappearance to the authorities, take him to a psychiatric clinic for treatment, and let him live with one of you for a while after he’s been found.

you have said it all mam this is the problem many Christians face, to holy to notice there sin, everyone a sinner as long as they are not attending there church..

This is what you get when you look at your FAITH instead of looking up to Jesus the Author and finisher of our FAITH.

LET GOD BE TRUE AND EVERY MAN A LIAR.

Op I'm sorry about your dad. Your dad needs help. You and your sisters should try as much as possible to get his sanity restored. Take him to a psychiatric hospital then get him out of that troublesome environment. I nor wan talk about that your brother. Na better nuisance. He needs help too before it is too late for him.

Everything will be fine soon .

The truth is your family need help, I recommend everyone their for psychiatric evaluation, that is that, the ur brother need help he need a counselor u need to get him one or recommend it to him.

GodPunishBiafra:
Ope88
You girls should take care of your father until his sanity is restored to a good state

After that, he should get a good lawyer and he should write his will.

Your brat brother has gone out of control.
If he doesn't kill him las las, he'll kill both of your parents...

No thanks to his mum who had spoilt him.
Your Dad suffers from a form of dementia and a close eye needs to be kept on him to avoid his being permanently lost.
Your Dad needs to write his will fast to avoid endless litigations and problems when he passes .I also hope you ladies were not mean to your brother when he was younger because of the attention that was being given him as an only son, as this might explain his resentment towards you all

Such a pity.

Op doesn't like her parents church. You have the right to. And I blame your parents for that.

Now the parents are behaving irrationally and we rush to blame the church.

I have heard everytime about fanatics, in as much as such people will always be in every congregation, there is no time that Deeper Life teaches fanaticism. Their/Our messages are all over the internet, point to any that is fanatical.

The family is dysfunctional because you have allowed the enemy to take the front seat, but we overlook our carelessness and blame the church, afterall their name says Deeper.

It's such a wrong mentality. I have been in this church for over 30 years and I haven't seen what the internet people paint them to be. If you have seen, then they were never really born again.

jaxxy:


U said u dad abandoned his family( parents and siblings) cos he was a Christian( deeper life) to be precise so during all this family and health problems what has the church he so much adored and followed done to takecare of his wellbeing mentally and spiritually??

How come the church has also abandoned him? So who are his support system beside u gals and ur irresponsible mum?

It's a rather strange and sad story, quite surprising too. Deeper Life is a big church with millions of members, i don't think i would blame the church for this. i happen to know a couple of deeper life members, and i think i know their doctrine and teaching too. For one, they're not the dream exalting type, they're not the cursing type, they are not hideous everywhere, they don't label people witches like that. The family just seemed to have got lost in a big church unfortunately.

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las las ur younger bro will eliminate each of u guys one by one. Op, use ur brain now while u last.... Take ur dad out nd leave ur bro nd ur mom alone all 2geda... abt d house of a tin, 4get dat one o.... My dad built a 2bedroom flat in d village nd dis is making 9yrs i set my foot in dat compound... fear village people... I go build my own house.




your mom is just a shadow of her self... Time will surly tell

Pls op, just pay me for transport fare, i live in lekki phase 1,I'll surely leave my house and visit that your junior brother and una mum. I'll make sure that boy bleeds heavy blood while your mum I'll flog her with dry wood till she starts crying. This is the kind of people i so much hate in this world. People who cause other people depression. God bless you and your elder sister oo. I'll advise you take care of ur dad for the meantime till he gets better. And if he gets better pls dnt send him back to ur mum okay? When I'm done with the beating then he can return

Weathered:
bedazzled idiot

Lol learnt new word

What you are of writing here is a classical case of Odiepus Complex, roaming unchecked.

Girls love their father to a fault, and absolve him of all blames. It is due to early association of sexual homornes in children. The boys love their mothers, listen to her alone and are favour by her.

If this natural tendencies are not balanced out by parents in the childrens early life, the family will always be divided between Boys for mothers, and Girls for fathers. Especially after girls become women and have their
own voice. They often over excercise that voice, thinking they are emancipating their father from some bondage.
But ultimately, what you are doing is unbalancing the relationship your parents have built over years, in a very short time. If your are an Engr, I will just say you are creating a massive smount of entropy.



Let me state a few facts here without even checking your family details.

1. Your father has dementia or Alzheimer's, this is common in old age, especially among men. It has nothing to do with your mother controlling him.

2. Every man yields some level of control to his wife. Just like you control your husband to some extent. This is a conscious decision that is mutually beneficial for the couple involved, especially at old age. Your father could care less if his wife controlled him or not at his age. His focus is rather the progress of his children.

3. In African setting, the man is usually older than the woman. Hence, as they age, more control falls yo the woman. By interferring with this power shift, you and your sisters make it more difficult for your mother to take care of your father. The right pattern is that, your all support your mother who in turn takes care of your father.

4. Taking care of your aged parents is not a kids play. It can challenge your new family and hubby, and is not easy for your mother alone, talkless of with a hooligan son involved. So get the right perspective and help your family.

5. Your father, having Dementia or even Alzheimer's , means you and your sibblings might be genetically pre-disposed, so start, planning for you old age.

6. Stop playing divide and rule in your family so that, it might actually work the way your father had it planned. His wife in charge as he waned. To run that house your mother needs not just material support, but moral support. A few "hey mum, thanks you are really taking care of Daddy". And suggestions of new mordern things and treatments.

Bottom line, your father is sick, with age related disease. It has nothing to do with your mother. Better get him medical help, and stop blaming your mother for her life, which she lived in good consonance with your father, and which might have been dictated by your father abintio. They made their choices, fullfilled their responsibilities. Can you confidently say you are doing a better job with your own children. Get a grip and move on with your own life, fullfilling your responsibilities with them.

As young people, we often do not understand that our aging parents are loosing capacity which we must plan consciously to help them adapt to, otherwise their quality of life deteriorates.

Ishilove:
You need to find your father asap. I had a neighbor who was fond of disappearing like this. It ended in tears.

Find him first then take him away from that environment that triggers his episodes. Forget what people will say and forget about his houses. As for your brother, karma will deal with him but for now the important thing is finding your dad.

On a personal note, no brother of mine can beat me up. He will sleep inside a cell for a minimum of 3 days. Y'all need to show the spoilt brat that you are his elders.

Or else He will beat Her again. Teach him alittle lesson. 9 Years no be here!

please keep your dad from that house.. he could be suffering from Alzheimer's disease which is a progressive disorder that causes brain cells to waste away (degenerate) and die. Alzheimer's disease is the most common cause of dementia — a continuous decline in thinking, behavioral and social skills that disrupts a person's ability to function independently.

I wanted to type something but this is a public forum.... I link you up with who go humble your brother....

Ope88:


I tried discussing this with my husband, but he is of the opinion that it might harden him and might come back to hunt us, and that we can't quench fire with fire, the thought of him beating my second mum still shatters my soul and then the news of my dad's disappearance, we are still looking for him still... He is 70 years old.

So you elder sisters husband just close mouth dey look....not me.

www.nairaland.com/attachments/11555635_2554518_jpeg54384750bdc52a7911ef0b23fbdc0af7

Ope88:


They all know her attitude, she just goes to church, worships and lives, she practically lives in isolation with only few people she talks to, she doesn't even talk to me but she does to my husband... I have asked my husband if my daddy can come leave with us, he said no problem, but yoruba sees it as a taboo, given that I'm not a boy and that he also built his house, and that people will ask why my mum can't take care of him.

Dont listen to People, Taboo, culture etc. Its because ure in Nigeria naa. So many parents live with their female Children abroad and no one sees anything wrong in it. Take your dad home and take good care of him. Leave your brother, mum and the property to them. However, let themn know youre ready to communicating and discussions when they are ready.

Ope88:
Beautiful people, he has been found.... Badly beaten and bruised....from what my mum told me.... I'll get back to u all on this.

You still call that sort of woman Mum...Abuse her children and abandoned her husband..Layer she sef go talk say she be good christian..She is deceiving herself. Telk her that.

HarunaWest:

So you elder sisters husband just close mouth dey look....not me.

As in ehn person wey I go use one night contact my guy make catch am for street tie am out inside booth ....go somewhere go drop first.

I used to watched this in Igbo movie, never do I believe it existed in real life and my own region?



it's long begone that Yoruba practices gender inequality even though giving one child attention happened to be a culture among some Yorubas, my mom as a ref point


Op, seek Spiritual redress on this matter first before any actions. you don't use physical to handle spiritual if you don't want to be consumed


you need to be spiritually fit to overcome this family weird life. seek spiritual redress from a genuine prophet, I believe it would come out fine. someone somewhere might be using your brother as a cane to discipline your home, it might even be an insider