Never been married but I believe marriage is what you make of it.
If you chose to make it fun, it will be fun. If you chose to make it boring then your guess is as good as mine.

The place of friendship can never be overemphasized in marriage. Of you marry your friend, at the most your disagreements and differences can always be tolerable and easily resolved as most friends tend to do. unlike when youre married to a total stranger who just want to use you to fulfill all righteousness and expects you to be Mr, /miss perfect. He'll always find fault at the slightest and find it difficult to forgive or let go cos he has his set standard of how you should relate or do things his own way. Which doesn't always play out well and it's not the way friends roll that make them stand the test of time to the point where people even had to coin an adage that says " friends are closer than siblings " or BFF " best friends for ever" .

A stranger will never disclose all about them to you and you get to find out yourself in a painful way but a friend will open up to you the way it is with them. Reason you can vouch for some friends to a large extent and not be disappointed. But vouch for a "stranger" husband and discover he has another family or other children outside, at his death.

Never marry a stranger. Marry your friend.

There's no other way to God than to call upon Him your self through Jusus Christ. Pls don't make any mistake.

No one is perfect but please accept Jesus Christ as your personally Lord and Savior now because tomorrow maybe too late.

Tell him to have mercy upon you and save your soul and He should please write your name in the book of life, Amen


GOD LOVES US

Dyt:


I[b] really do wish every child has me as a teacher
Every man as a partner
Every mother as a daughter
Every brother as a sister

I am God's very own [/b]

Thanks for your kind words

You're that good and your first marriage still failed? Wow.

My marriage will be 8years by December, though some of us find it easy while some of us regretted their decision. What I have found out about marriage is that if it works for you it works but if it doesn’t work don’t force it except you can withstand the heat.
Not all marriage works because some men and women are difficult to live with. you can’t just live with them no matter how you try. Even bible confirmed it ; proverb 21 vs 9 —-Better to live on the corner of a roof
than to share a house with a nagging wife. It can be a husband too.

Samakus:


You're that good and your first marriage still failed? Wow.

some things are beyond your comprehension baby

To be realistic. Nothing is guaranteed. U May put in all d efforts in dis world, what will work out will work out and what will not work out will not work out. we just pray and hope it works out.

emerged01:
My marriage will be 8years by December, though some of us find it easy while some of us regretted their decision. What I have found out about marriage is that if it works for you it works but if it doesn’t work don’t force it except you can withstand the heat.
Not all marriage works because that some men and women that you can’t just live with no mater how you try. Even bible confirmed ; proverb 21 vs 9 —-Better to live on the corner of a roof
than to share a house with a nagging wife. It can be a husband too.

i always believed people nag because they want something

Three things to consider before getting married.

In no particular order:

Face: does the person's face look like the one you want to look at for the rest of your life?

Is it the face you want to wake up beside every morning?

Physique: The truth is, we all have types. Some love them slender and others love them thick.

Some love them tall and some love them short.

Some love them hairy, and others, the reverse.

Personality: probably the most important of all.

Their personality has to be that which you can live with comfortably for the rest of your life.

I'm not talking about morals here.

Some love their partners to be sexual deviants. Some love women who nag. Some love introverts. Some love prudes.

Find out what personality type you want and go for it.

After all said and done, remember to treat each other with kindness and do unto your spouse what you want them to do to you.

Buckle up, and enjoy the bumpy ride. No marriage is easy.

Marriage is sweet when you marry someone you love. Not just on your side you guys just have a relationship friendship that keeps the thing going. You see him every morning and still attracted to him or her. You see him outside just coming from a far distance and within you you are proud this is my husband/wife

Marriage has its challenges but dont take things too seriously. Loosen up. Open your heart to love. Play tease each other . Be each others companion. Marry who you love. If you love chubby lady or man go for them. If you love fair guys go for them if you like them short good. Dont marry someone with others preference. Marry what you will look at for the rest of your life and still be happy you made the right decision. Even when they wrong you . You still want to stick around and make it work. You dont suddenly wake up and you feel irritated with there presence. When love is one sided its bad. That is what causes breakup. One person is fed up the other is trying to make it work at the end they work out. But if love is mutual . You just work it out together.

I dont no what eles keep marriage but 4 years counting still inlove with my spouse.

liberalchick:
An ‘easy’ marriage is not common even for those in-love. Sometimes I think the concept of marriage is unnatural but necessary. If I am single again (knock on wood) in the future, I wouldn’t want to get married again. Some marriages have its ebbs and flows. The first two years can be difficult for obvious reasons. Then marriage challenges in year 8 (that’s generally the time some marriages hit a wall).

DH and I are in cruise control now, children are getting older, careers are taking off with more responsibilities. They say if you make it past year 7-8 unscathed, you are good.

Modified.

why do you say it is necessary?

Carchoice:
i don’t know why you people are making marriage sound like it’s a war zone. You married the wrong person no doubt. We all get to find out after marriage.

Here’s the truth of the matter, it’s either you married the wrong person or YOU ARE THE WRONG PERSON.

Some people always say this as an automatic response to a marriage not being painted as a bed of roses, but how do you even quantify this objectively?

I feel that there are too many possible factors and things that those looking in from the outside aren't privy to, to always automatically run to this as the explanation. People have their own different experiences

you people need to stop reminding me about marriage...
I don't want to be reminded about marriage at all.


btw,


why is it that women are the ones so concerned about this marriage of a thing, and you'll see most of them, in their singlehood, acting and behaving as if men mean nothing in their lives?



I want to learn.

TripleOh7:
Three things to consider before getting married.

In no particular order:

Face: does the person's face look like the one you want to look at for the rest of your life?

Is it the face you want to wake up beside every morning?

Physique: The truth is, we all have types. Some love them slender and others love them thick.

Some love them tall and some love them short.

Some love them hairy, and others, the reverse.

Personality: probably the most important of all.

Their personality had to be that which you can live with comfortably for the rest of your life.

I'm not talking about morals here.

Some love their partners to be sexual degenerates. Some love women who nag. Some love introverts. Some love prudes.

Find out what personality type you want and go for it.

After all said and done, remember to treat each other with kindness and do unto your spouse what you want them to do to you.

Buckle up, and enjoy the bumpy ride. No marriage is easy.

all these things wont be there till forever
i mean the face
the physique
the sexual prowess

personality could really go a long way, thats where understanding comes in
but what if there's no communication to enhance the one you have?

Plead:


This religious fanatic won’t stop displaying his stupidity all over the forum.

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Minding your business is necessary.

Dyt:


some things are beyond your comprehension baby

Just one harmless joke and your ego is already punctured to the point of seeking retribution?

Now we know where the problem was from

bethyz:
Marriage is sweet when you marry someone you love. Not just on your side you guys just have a relationship friendship that keeps the thing going. You see him every morning and still attracted to him or her. You see him outside just coming from a far distance and within you you are proud this is my husband/wife

Marriage has its challenges but dont take things too seriously. Loosen up. Open your heart to love. Play tease each other . Be each others companion. Marry who you love. If you love chubby lady or man go for them. If you love fair guys go for them if you like them short good. Dont marry someone with others preference. Marry what you will look at for the rest of your life and still be happy you made the right decision. Even when they wrong you . You still want to stick around and make it work. You dont suddenly wake up and you feel irritated with there presence. When love is one sided its bad. That is what causes breakup. One person is fed up the other is trying to make it work at the end they work out. But if love is mutual . You just work it out together.

I dont no what eles keep marriage but 4 years counting still inlove with my spouse.

May God continue to bless your home

1deca:
There's no other way to God than to call upon Him your self through Jusus Christ. Pls don't make any mistake.

No one is perfect but please accept Jesus Christ as your personally Lord and Savior now because tomorrow maybe too late.

Tell him to have mercy upon you and save your soul and He should please write your name in the book of life, Amen


GOD LOVES US

Tommorow may be too late.

Too late for what?

Plead:


This religious fanatic won’t stop displaying his stupidity all over the forum.

What is fanatical about that particular post?

He just explained what the author of marriage stated.. That's the foundation, it's not compulsory it suits all.... There are different yolks, you decide on the one that fits you,

UjuJoan2:


I still feel so restricted, even though I've been married for going on 10yrs now. . . And my husband is one of the most liberal Nigerian husbands I know . . Yet I feel caged, and sometimes find myself wishing I was single and free . . . I wonder if that will ever end!

You've been married before, why do you even want to go there again? If my marriage ever ends, I'm NEVER getting hitched again. I'm staying single for life!

You have every right to feel however you want to.

Pardon my asking, how committed are you to this unending institution, plus do you lash out at your husband some days when you feel the whole marriage thing is choking you.

Despite all the negativities about marriage these days, it is something I am really looking forward to. Some people with their attitudes as singles, or in the work place you will know how difficult they are and that they're barely tolerable.
Don't get married yet if you can't fix your attitude.

Samakus:


Just one harmless joke and your ego is already punctured to the point of seeking retribution?

Now we know where the problem was from

and how come you didnt see it was a mere expression?

some of y'all think too much

it will be ok to say you should have an average evening

Carchoice:
My sister, I thought it was only me that is feeling this way. My worry now is, after marriage, how can I just automatically stop admiring fine asxs and buubs. I can’t see that happening. It’s a future impossible occurrence.

Admiring is always a choice and your right as a human being (whether married or single)!!!... It's when you decide to overstep the sacred marital boundary of mere admiration that Thunder will do the needful!!!

Plead:


This religious fanatic won’t stop displaying his stupidity all over the forum.

You should have followed your signature advice rather than striking out someone's opinion

UjuJoan2:


I still feel so restricted, even though I've been married for going on 10yrs now. . . And my husband is one of the most liberal Nigerian husbands I know . . Yet I feel caged, and sometimes find myself wishing I was single and free . . . I wonder if that will ever end!

You've been married before, why do you even want to go there again? If my marriage ever ends, I'm NEVER getting hitched again. I'm staying single for life!

Hahahahaha


God bless u 4bn honest
Imagine If he was not libral?

alezzy13:
Hmm. All these people claiming syrupy sweet marriage. . .pls be realistic.

E no better for you no mean say people no dey lick honey inside o

Dyt:


all these things wont be there till forever
i mean the face
the physique
the sexual prowess

personality could really go a long way, thats where understanding comes in
but what if there's no communication to enhance the one you have?

Of course, nothing lasts forever.

But the face and the physique will carry you through the turbulent phase of marriage when the kids and the finance become huge distractions.

By the time the physique is gone you are both used to each other like a comfortable pair of shoes.

Face doesn't really change much.

No matter how lined or scarred it is, you'll always see that face you fell in love with many a moon ago and that's what matters.

But like I said, the personality is the most important.

You must be able to live with your partners personality.

UjuJoan2:


I still feel so restricted, even though I've been married for going on 10yrs now. . . And my husband is one of the most liberal Nigerian husbands I know . . Yet I feel caged, and sometimes find myself wishing I was single and free . . . I wonder if that will ever end!

You've been married before, why do you even want to go there again? If my marriage ever ends, I'm NEVER getting hitched again. I'm staying single for life!

mechonu eba! Your husband is a good man and you're feeling so caged. Like you didn't know marriage was a responsibility.
restriction keeyouder

TripleOh7:


Tommorow may be too late.

Too late for what?

Thanks. Only God knows what's going to happen

Dyt:
What is Before, In Between and After?

Yeah we all know marriage is an institution between 2 persons with the aim to have offspring and companionship, but is this all we see and make of it?

I am a person that believes in relationship/marriage and tries to go far in making it work well except when it starts to affect my mental health (i cant go mad all in the name of i want it to work)

Some say marriage is easy while some say its a hard work, we all have different opinions..
I for one been married before, it didnt work not because i couldnt try but (my choice anyway)

I am considering going into another and all the things that we do that counts now may not in few years, I mean the sexiness, the kamasutra and all, well of course i am not just gonna be offering just sex, we both got more to keep us going for a 100years to come (my favourite part is the friendship and companionship)...

I am scared sometimes waking up to him every other day and same way it excites me

How has it been with those married for 5years and counting? the joy, feeling, the tears, the arguments, the sex, I mean all of it....

It's complicated. Hi Dyt. The most important thing you have to bear in mind is the person you eventually marry will not be the same person in 5 years, 10 years, 15 years, etc. As human beings we want experiences and those experiences change us for the good or the bad. The ability to have and keep a healthy and happy marriage is the realization that changes in the character, physique and attitude of your spouse will occur and you have to adapt to these changes. When you get a job, have a baby, go to school while working, etc will put pressure on you and definitely alter the way you behave. You and your spouse must adapt to these changes. Another problem is this mindset, especially among women that because you are married your mission is accomplished. Girl, that is when the work really begins. Remember, there was a reason he married you and you married him. It is hard but both parties have to try on a daily basis to keep the illusion going. Not trying to do so is one of the main reasons people cheat. "Oh she's getting fat". "Can you imagine, he now has a pot belly", etc. Believe it or not, my wife literally looks the same way she did the day i met her more than 20 years ago. Yes i know it's hard to believe. It's didn't just happen by magic. As i am typing this, she is downstairs doing jumping jacks, sit ups, push ups, and whatever exercises in her regimen to keep her shape and keep looking sexy for me. This after 3 kids. She will put any 20 year old to shame with the way she looks. She's 44 but you'd think she was 24 by looking at her. On my part i'm lucky. My job requires me to be extremely fit and look good so i ain't got a choice. Lastly, finances. If both your finances are screwed up then both of you are screwed. It will not matter how sexy you are or how handsome he is. This is the reason both parties have to plan and make joint decisions in matters relating to their financial future. I had to learn this the hard way early on. Marriage ain't easy but if you can master these 3 core foundations of change, finances, and physical well being you'll always be ahead of the game. Always.

Carchoice:
i don’t know why you people are making marriage sound like it’s a war zone. You married the wrong person no doubt. We all get to find out after marriage.

Here’s the truth of the matter, it’s either you married the wrong person or YOU ARE THE WRONG PERSON.

The statement in bold is the whole truth, and nothing but the truth!!! Matter of fact, this is the Holy Grail!!! Aptly delivered!!!

Those of you getting into marriage just on a foundation of mere physical attraction or lust, get ready to walk on egg shells and hot coals for years to come, when you finally realize only true friendship and companionship can sustain a marriage!!!

Dyt:


i always believed people nag because they want something

That one na different thing o! Nagging pass nagging. When you partner pick on you all the time.....he never see anything you do right. Always complaining about every step you take. To go house self from work go Dey fear you.

liberalchick:

No, I didn’t marry the wrong person. I am just being realistic, living with someone for the rest of your life will not always be romantic and easy. There are different stages in marriages where it’s excellent, good, bad, sometimes ugly and then neutral.

Also, sometimes when people say their marriage is easy, sometimes it’s one sided, they are probably oblivious of their partner’s sacrifice to make the marriage an easy one for them.

Anyone saying marriage is easy is just lying pathetically!!!... If it were a bed of roses, there would be no divorce at all!