Tadeknkeepcalm:
Lose your good man?

In all honesty, he's not as good as you make him out to be.


No responsible person will opt in for babymamaism.


So paddle your boat elsewhere.



Current generation are so scared of commitment. They want all the goodies of a thing but not the baggage that comes with it

The 1st sensible, factual and straight to the point response on this thread so far!

Well said!

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

If you believe you can't leave him and start another relationship with another man, you have to dance to his tune

But if you know pretty well that you don't want to be a baby mama which I agree with you then it's time to think twice and leave

He has his reasons but especially he loves his freedom so his type may not take marriage serious

Marriage restric freedom from men and commits them to the relationship, not all men likes it

Some people are just a disgrace to us as men. Imagine a 35 year old man not thinking of getting married, but planning for baby mama. At his age, I had been married for 5 years and up till now, still enjoying my home - wife and children - after 9 years of marriage.
Some men will just be growing age-wise, but still be reasoning like a 21 year old!

What a pity!

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

Better have a broken heart now that will mend later when your man comes along. If he is really serious there is little or nothing you can do to change his mind.

It could also mean that he does not love you enough and might still end up with someone later. But if at 35 he is still reasoning this way that change of heart might come when he is much older maybe...

Besides, as a baby mama you might also be saddled with most of the responsibility of the child/children. Learn from your own life and give your children a better opportunity at life..

It might not be easy but you will be fine at the long run.

@Op please don't fall for this cheap trick.
please don't be a baby mama for him. You deserve better than that. Think of the future and the future of the child if you decide to be a baby mama. it is well

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

I’m willing to give you my phone number to discuss this if you like. Long story short. Don’t do it. Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free. He can’t even respect you by honoring you before your house hold. Thank God he has shown you this. If you don’t view this as a red flag you are in trouble. Once you have the baby, he doesn’t marry you.. it will be hard for another man to want someone’s baby mama.. RUN!!!

LordOfTheGame:
Different people with different problems. Men like us are seriously looking for a serious and sensible girl to marry and settle down with while some others are running away and looking for only baby mamas.
Life shaa....

I encourage you to trust God, pray and keep on the search for that good wife, work hard at improving yourself to be a good spouse, and God that knows all things including the heart of men, will bring your way, the best spouse for you.

Confusedgirl869:
It's not uyail. My main is quite popular, I don't want this nairaland boys trolling me with my problem, you know how they are.

Give me your main NL account. I promise not to reveal your identity. Pleeeaaaassssse.

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

He’s a very wise man. Please pass my salutations to him and tell him I plead for him to not waiver on his intention.

Great Story

mrpaedo:


Naija guys don dey get sense small small

Marriage is a complete NO-NO for me

Bachelor for life

Sharp guy.

timekeeper1:



He is a wise man.... Very wise.... Thank God

LOL.. No worry you sef get sister or you go surely born girl.

Another man go turn them to baby mama and form wise man.

AristocraticMe:
meaning?

if na u u go wait?

olumide4christ:


I encourage you to trust God, pray and keep on the search for that good wife, work hard at improving yourself to be a good spouse, and God that knows all things including the heart of men, will bring your way, the best spouse for you.

miDe BABy

olumide4christ:
Some people are just a disgrace to us as men. Imagine a 35 year old man not thinking of getting married, but planning for baby mama. At his age, I had been married for 5 years and up till now, still enjoying my home - wife and children - after 9 years of marriage.
Some men will just be growing age-wise, but still be reasoning like a 21 year old!

What a pity!

21 is aGe of matuRity. Nle iri na otua Kodi ifiye oge buru sofRio before4 you insult us Onye OGloGO

woodsbeatrice30:


leave that one joo.. oya how can I get your digits?kindly send me a mail at trumpwere@yahoo.com ose baby.. lost login to the email on this account

BRitneytRUmP@GmAil.cOm

Tadeknkeepcalm:
Lose your good man?

In all honesty, he's not as good as you make him out to be.


No responsible person will opt in for babymamaism.


So paddle your boat elsewhere.



Current generation are so scared of commitment. They want all the goodies of a thing but not the baggage that comes with it

LISTEN TO THE VOICE OF WISDOM !
It's obvious you are yet to know the real "him"

Confusedgirl869:
Hmmm Thank you sir.

some men are scared of bad marriage not becos. he's not good

I think I am old enough to Father you...he may look to be the best to you now and tomorrow he would be the worse you will ever pray to meet...At times God do speak to us through some action line but we do not, most time recognized the voice.Excuse yourself from him ,move on ,no one wake up to prayed for a broken home at prime age.. Your goals partner is in few meter away , only if you can be patient and a step ahead of him..@35 he supposed by now have a stable home..he may look, behaved , sounded calm but within him is an eccentric fellow who had no better decision.Ask him if he will ever stop boarding motors,planes because of potential accident... Marriage can be a well calculated risk.. Spiritually you can secure it by asking or enquiry through divine means...Leave him..

he doesn't love you. he wants you to be part of his life but not fully part of his life. its called "come and be going".. that's what we do when we don't really really love you. Find your own soulmate. Or leave him, his brain might reset and if it doesn't , move on .

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

KenBen217:

so I'm not the only one who doesn't want to marry and just want kids

only you ke? we plenty, but if I eventually marry I'm definitely not signing any court paper. I just hate how people tag marraige with being responsible.

Tadeknkeepcalm:
Lose your good man?

In all honesty, he's not as good as you make him out to be.


No responsible person will opt in for babymamaism.


So paddle your boat elsewhere.



Current generation are so scared of commitment. They want all the goodies of a thing but not the baggage that comes with it

abeg change your mentality, who you to tag someone irresponsible simply because of their personal decisions? ah ahn! so I can't decide I don't want the extra baggage of a woman in my OWN house?

Madam I personally didnt want to comment on this but if what you say is true then go on and be a baby mama already. Marriage as we know it is overrated abeeg.

On one hand, you may lose your boyfriend or life partner if you hold your ground but on the other hand you can gain everything you ever wanted from the union. Look at it this way after marriage he is still your boyfriend but at least try to do court wedding if he will agree to that.

And if he doesn't then take a leap of faith. All the people advising you to walk away are they ready to make you their wife or find you a new boyfriend? It's a shitty world for a man but the woman of his dreams can make it beautiful. So ask yourself what is more important, marriage or the relationship.

GODPUNISHUNA:


Marriage is the biggest scam known to man. Only the lady benefits.

At the boldfaced, it's never too late to do what makes you happy. Life is too short to remain in a miserable union

It's too late, I'm drowned

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

/
Your life, your choice.

Whoever you are with now is the best you can attract. Tomorrow your best will still come.
/

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

You are not a perfect match. Only a man can decide a perfect match then gets on one knee and the lady can accept his proposal of perfect match so wake up.

Confusedgirl869:
I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money , I take care of all my needs myself . He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

Why don't you disturb him for money? Is he supposed to hit you? That is not what makes a good woman rather it is what good donkeys are made of - hardwork and not materalistic

Confusedgirl869:
So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next.

You have left your goalpost and now playing attacker. Listen! when a man wants you - nothing can stop him from letting you know and he will pull every legal trick in the world to show it to you. You will not have to think - you will know.

Confusedgirl869:
I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

It is not him!

Confusedgirl869:
Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

He feels you are independent enough and hardworking enough to look after yourself and his child without being materialistic and needing him.

Are you?

Confusedgirl869:
Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person.

Did you come to earth with anyone? Are you leaving earth with anyone?

You are trying to force a man into marriage and the women who did it before you - suffered for it.

At 26 years old, you are young and tight - do not waste these years with a man who does not want you because a man who will take 50 strokes of cane for you is somewhere, who will fight another man for you, who will provide for you and your kids is around the corner but this nonsense endeavour you are in - will not let you see him.

Confusedgirl869:
I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

Work on your self esteem dear. Give that man 2 -5 years and he will meet the woman who he will kill for and her kids will live in the house with him while your kids will live with you. He will pay her kids school fees and you will pay your kids school fees.

Anyway I stand a hardworking non materialistic woman - but he still don't want you! The woman he will pick will not be "hardworking" and she will be materialistic and yet he will beg her to be with him.

What are you worth

Smile4mee01:
All of you advising her there are tons of men out there ready to wife her up.

There is no guarantee, it's like you guys don't know the number of marriageable ladies seeking marriage outside. if i dey lie, go shiloh, anywayz, who says she can't be lucky.

The way e dey go now, women go dey hustle partner from womb.

Holy shiiii brooo your response cracked me up...as women take plenty na so men sef plenty wey dey look for wife na.. She's up all day and night to get lucky

[quote author=Confusedgirl869 post=90526874]Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

.[every body will say their own as they see it.. ur boyfriend may be having comittement phobia probably because of issues he may have had with women in the past. Just try and talk to him once more this time through a friend of his or someone he respects. He just might come around and most importantly pray]

vickydankal:
I wonder why you are still with him. He claims to love you but not enough to kill his fears and marry you. Sweet sister , your boy friend is afraid of one thing and it is called “commitment and responsibility “. Leave him as soon as you can and wait for the right man to come. Any baby daddy is free to mingle with as many women as he wants besides no vow or laws binding him to you. He wants to eat his cake and still have it.

africa feminist have made it look like africa marriage only benefit men... like women are being called slave for wanting to get married.... this things keep hitting our social media space day in day out.

this is the result, more and more men are gradually reorienting themselves of this union called marriage... it will get more difficult with time.... women should just adjust, because baby mama is now a thing of this generation

our generation has lost it

olumide4christ:


The 1st sensible, factual and straight to the point response on this thread so far!

Well said!

. Its the most non sensible ,wrong and zig- zag to the point on this thread so far .Marriage does not make one responsible ,Accepting What could be avoided is not Responsibility .Life itself Generally without a woman living with you is full of it's most responsibility why creating an additional and unnecessary Responsibility so save yourself of the Trash of responsibilities ,Better go check what Goodies are .If anyone want Marriage go for it ,If you don't want leave it .

D question I v for u are .... Can u vouch for him ?.... Is he compassionate ? ... Is he just n god-fearing? ... Is he kind heated ? ... Does he ve a good parent /family ? ... Does he v responsible friends ? Does he really loves u? ... Does he ve a good n reliable source of income n does not party /smokes? ... Does he an apartment n good future plans ? ... If your ans to all these questions s positive /yes .... Don't leave him , he s a good man , experiences ve a role to play in our life decisions ...try work it out with ur man ... It s a case of d devil u know n d angel u don't knw

Confusedgirl869:
Hello everyone. This account is created for this .

This issue has been bothering me a lot and I am very confused on what to do.

We have been together for more than 2 years now and we hardly have issues, infact we are a perfect match or so I thought.

I am 26 while he is 35, we both working and I never disturb him for money, I take care of all my needs myself. He is very calm and peaceful, doesn't hit me and I really admire him a lot. I on the other hand is also good, hardworking, not materialistic and all that makes a good woman.

So after thinking of our relationship thoroughly some weeks ago, I realised that there is really nothing stopping us from getting married this year or next. I decided to hear what he has to say because he never talked about us being or getting married. I also noticed that whenever he sees or hears about bad marriages he felt lucky he is not in yet. This always makes me feel bad because I know myself. I also wasn't a fan of marriage before I met him because of so many bad men out there, but everything changed when I met my guy, he is what I want. The very first day we met, the first thought that came to my mind was 'this is my him' I don't know why I had that thought being our first time meeting.

Anyways, few weeks ago I decided to ask him what his plans are. Are we in on a long thing or not? I got the shock of my life when he made me understand that he doesn't want to be tied forever, he loves his space and the way nobody disturbs him. That he only wants a baby mama, he wants me to be the mother his kids but not in marriage. I was mad and I cried for days. He was even sounding like nothing is wrong with being a baby mama, maybe not but I just can't.

Well, I made him understand that I can't be a baby mama and it will also be hard for me to move on with another person. I've bonded so well with him and all that. And I also hate jumping from one man to another. I told him to talk to people who are in successful marriages and stop looking at the bad ones. Today when we were talking I asked him about it and he is still maintaining his stand on the mama.

I don't want to give birth to kids that have 2 homes, I grew up like that(it took me lots of self discipline not to become useless) and wouldn't want that kind of life for my kids, I want them to grow with their parents in ONE house. At the same time, I don't want to lose my good man and relationship.

I need your opinions please.

He has told you where he stands, pls move on, I am of older generation mindset, Babymama is for irresponsible people however I can understand why people do it though.