We all know it is the normal affair for a woman to officially change her surname to her husband’s name after the wedding.

In some cases, the woman goes as far as changing her state of origin to her husband’s.

So you hear things like, “I am Delta by blood, Yoruba by marriage.”

However, with the rapid change in our social stances and the cry of gender equality getting stronger by the day, a lot of married women do not change their surnames these days and some single ladies have expressed their stance not to change their surnames after marriage.

This may be seen as rebellion of some sort, chaos to a perfect order of living or simply unnecessary but the reasons behind this is perfectly logical.

The reasons for women choosing not to change their surnames vary:

 1.  Identity: Some women feel it is not worth the stress.

One married woman said, “Everyone knows me as Ms. T. Y. Changing my name and having all my documents bear Mrs T. Z. is totally unnecessary to me. What if an old contact wants to reach out to me and can’t find me by my original name? Abeg, I cannot jare. Besides, if it is not an issue in my home. My husband and the kids bear his surname. I bear my own. Everybody is fine.”
 
2. Equality: A woman changing her surname after marriage is one of the manifestations of gender superiority.

It shows that the man’s identity is far more important than the woman’s and this should not be as man and woman both need each other to coexist.


3. Culture: History has shown us that in most African cultures in precolonial times, the woman always retained her family identity.


Continue reading at https://9jababa.com/i-will-not-bear-my-husbands-surname/

What's in a name?

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet"

Ok but what has changing name gat to do with gender equality...

Fair enough.

Please go ahead and keep your father's name but, realise that your family members have no right to collect a single Kobo from any man in the name of "bride price". Afterall you are not a piece of property and both of you are equal! Why should he pay to marry you?

Better yet, don't get married at all so you won't be faced with this name change "dilemma" in the first place

Better still if you're a celeb, you can still maintain your father's name and his father's name alongside. Example Mrs Temi Otedola Lagbaja

But if you're nobody, who your father's name help before than to acquire more enemy from your father's house is better you change that evil surname to your husband's And have less enemy and be enjoying your private life

Its all about choices. There is nothing wrong with a woman keeping her father's name, especially if you were born into affluence, you can't possibly dump a great name to bear the name of a nobody. Some women hypernate their names after marriage, to add their fathers name at the end, ain't a bad idea at all.

The husband does not have money and his family name will not open any doors or draw a WOW, this is the only reason any nigerian woman will be having this conversation.

I’m not fussed over it personally, but to each their own, it’s about choice.

And not all cultures collect bride price...plus nowadays, many women contribute equally to the household and some are even breadwinners and still bear their husband’s name. So I don’t see what all the fuss is about and why people get worked up if she chooses not to for whatever reason, it's a personal thing.

One of the first question I ask 2 months into dating

Then I dump immediately

profdview1 what is ur surname

ibkayee:
I’m not fussed over it personally, but to each their own, it’s about choice.

And not all cultures collect bride price...plus nowadays, many women contribute equally to the household and some are even breadwinners and still bear their husband’s name. So I don’t see what all the fuss is about and why people get worked up if she chooses not to for whatever reason, it's a personal thing.

People feel that they have to control others in order to live a good life. An impossible task with frustration all the way through.

Hathor5:


People feel that they have to control others in order to live a good life. An impossible task with frustration all the way through.

Lol it's a mindset they need to get rid of smh

This same thread again?

Why

Feminist

The ignorant ones will start shouting feminism. I don't see anything wrong in a woman wanting to retain her father's name, she could just add her husband's name beside it.. celebrity or not, its about choices. Like someone mentioned above, nowadays the women contribute equally in the home, so no one should feel like they own anyone.

Feminist spotted

missimelda01:
The ignorant ones will start shouting feminism. I don't see anything wrong in a woman wanting to retain her father's name, she could just add her husband's name beside it.. celebrity or not, its about choices. Like someone mentioned above, nowadays the women contribute equally in the home, so no one should feel like they own anyone.

A Muslim lady is not allowed to drop her father name for her husband's name. It has never be an issue in my marriage and it will never be.

andrewtosin:
Feminist spotted

How pleased?

Very pleased

Alennsar:

How pleased?

first move if stubborn wife

Lol.

Who has time for all those discussions sef?
I still retain my father's name.
We have plenty things to worry and talk about than change of name.

It doesn't mean am stubborn or that I love my husband less.

As a matter of fact I dont see it as any issue at all.

Besides I dont think i would want to alter any documents jare.

LilMissFavvy:
Its all about choices. There is nothing wrong with a woman keeping her father's name, especially if you were born into affluence, you can't possibly dump a great name to bear the name of a nobody. Some women hypernate their names after marriage, to add their fathers name at the end, ain't a bad idea at all.

when a fool speaks he is easily noticed


this is a very stupid statement, so your husband who is your head is a nobody?

Feminism is a social engineering tool used as a form of control, it is an ancient tool used by the arch enemy.

If you dont want to bear your husband's name, do whatever makes you happy and get lost somewhere warm!

missimelda01:
The ignorant ones will start shouting feminism. I don't see anything wrong in a woman wanting to retain her father's name, she could just add her husband's name beside it.. celebrity or not, its about choices. Like someone mentioned above, nowadays the women contribute equally in the home, so no one should feel like they own anyone.

Then she should stay in her father's house.. Adopt kids,rather than getting married. I wonder the kind of man that will allow you come to his house ,and be giving him rules and regulations to follow.. God forbid bad thing..

[s]

saucecode:
The husband does not have money and his family name will not open any doors or draw a WOW, this is the only reason any nigerian woman will be having this conversation.

[/s]

This one carry Nigerian women matter for head like buns, dey hawk everywhere from coast to coast
Onye mere gi ihe a eeeeeeeee? Si na gi buariwa ibu ka gi-aka, na gi ezudila-ike? Gwam onye owu biko
Onye ahu emekahu m'otu

Mr. Man shuttt up, just shuttt up. Are u drunk this morning? If you have a different opinion, call me out sensibly, not by insults. But if you are here to insulttt me be clear about it. I will only answer your question when your stand is clear. When will NL members ever give mentions without insults? Everyone has got their different ideas and opinions.

solite3:

when a fool speaks he is easily noticed


this is a very stupid statement, so your husband who is your head is a nobody?

Mariangeles:
[s]

This one carry Nigerian women matter for head like buns, dey hawk everywhere from coast to coast
Onye mere gi ihe a eeeeeeeee? Si na gi buariwa ibu ka gi-aka, na gi ezudila-ike? Gwam onye owu biko
Onye ahu emekahu m'otu [/s]

Aunty amaka, I resemble your town person ni

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