Please help Me, I need how to settle this with my fiancee. I can't seem to forgive myself for laying my hands on her as this is my first time of ever hiting a girl in my life. We've been on logger head of who is at fault and who will be the first to appologise but I felt betrayed and embarassed by her cos I love her so much.
We've been dating for over 7months and I've made my intentions open to her about settling down with her and she accepted.
Things took another turn in our relationship since last week of June. I'm a sales person in one of the companies in lagos and I have a client (a lady) I've pursuing to market my product to but have not been able to get an appointment with her. It happens that last week I called her (my client) and she told me she didn't go to work that day but if I want to see her it will be outside her office by 5pm. I obliged, and she sent me the address of the place where I will meet with her which is at a bar in one of the hotels on the island which happens to be near to where I reside.
The thing now is that I called my fiancee to notify her of my appointment with the said lady since its in the evening which means I will be coming back home late but her number did not go through may be due to network but I sent her a text which I know must deliver.
To cut the long story short, during the meeting with the lady at the hotel, to my authmost shock or will I call it coincidence I saw my fiancee at the other end of the bar with a guy. I couldn't believe my eyes so I had to call her phone and she picked and I told her to turn around from where she's seated which she did.
I didn't even believe what happened next as she stood up and rushed me at my table and started harassing and embarrassing me that I came to a hotel with a lady that I'm cheating on her. I was so astoned as I stood up and grabbed her to calm her down. I asked her what she was doing there with a man but she wasn't even listening to me. I told her I called her but her number didn't connect and I sent her a text but obviously she didn't see the text cos her phone must have been on silent cos she has been with a guy. She kept on acting crazy there and I had to slap her very hard cos she was acting creazily and embarrassing me and my client and also not answering my question of what she was doing there. While this was hapening, my client just left me and walked away which I don't blame her. I had to bolt out immediately too cos I couldn't stand the heart break and embarrassment.
The next day I received an sms from my fiancee still accusing me and saying that the man is her cousin who came to the house that day but they decided to go out to relax.
I later found out that the guy was her cousin who I'm yet to meet but the point now, is how could she act creazily like that the other day embarrassing me and my client and accusing me too.
We've not spoken for like 4days now looking for who will be the first person to appologise.
the thing is I love this girl and wouldn't want to loose her. But I didn't do anything bad to appologise cos I sent her a text to intimate her of my where about but she didn't tell me where she was going to.
Should I be the one to appologise to cos I was really embarrased that day or should I wait for her to do so cos she's at fault her from my own judgment.
Kindly advice me cos I've been loosing my mind since.

some ladies don't have shame,fighting publicly because of a man,dont apologize to her but for the slap alone you can ,you are not at fault here but stop raising your hands on women else it becomes a habit that will eventually ruin you

Nwoke m, go and apologize to her

You slapped her, if is hard for you to apologise then your marriage no go last.

Go and apologize for not slapping her harder.
That's your only offence.

She cost you a client, ruined your reputation and doesn't even trust you at all. Use your brain oga.

You're not emotional stable

This shit is crazy Misunderstanding upon misunderstanding, I don't blame you for slapping her, she should have told you she's going out with her cousin. INFORMATION is very Important in a Relationship and I don't think you owe her an Apology, explain yourself and ignore her for weeks if she Apologises first then you do same Case closed.

By

Deduks:
Please help Me, I need how to settle this with my fiancee. I can't seem to forgive myself for laying my hands on her as this is my first time of ever hiting a girl in my life. We've been on logger head of who is at fault and who will be the first to appologise but I felt betrayed and embarassed by her cos I love her so much.
We've been dating for over 7months and I've made my intentions open to her about settling down with her and she accepted.
Things took another turn in our relationship since last week of June. I'm a sales person in one of the companies in lagos and I have a client (a lady) I've pursuing to market my product to but have not been able to get an appointment with her. It happens that last week I called her (my client) and she told me she didn't go to work that day but if I want to see her it will be outside her office by 5pm. I obliged, and she sent me the address of the place where I will meet with her which is at a bar in one of the hotels on the island which happens to be near to where I reside.
The thing now is that I called my fiancee to notify her of my appointment with the said lady since its in the evening which means I will be coming back home late but her number did not go through may be due to network but I sent her a text which I know must deliver.
To cut the long story short, during the meeting with the lady at the hotel, to my authmost shock or will I call it coincidence I saw my fiancee at the other end of the bar with a guy. I couldn't believe my eyes so I had to call her phone and she picked and I told her to turn around from where she's seated which she did.
I didn't even believe what happened next as she stood up and rushed me at my table and started harassing and embarrassing me that I came to a hotel with a lady that I'm cheating on her. I was so astoned as I stood up and grabbed her to calm her down. I asked her what she was doing there with a man but she wasn't even listening to me. I told her I called her but her number didn't connect and I sent her a text but obviously she didn't see the text cos her phone must have been on silent cos she has been with a guy. She kept on acting crazy there and I had to slap her very hard cos she was acting creazily and embarrassing me and my client and also not answering my question of what she was doing there. While this was hapening, my client just left me and walked away which I don't blame her. I had to bolt out immediately too cos I couldn't stand the heart break and embarrassment.
The next day I received an sms from my fiancee still accusing me and saying that the man is her cousin who came to the house that day but they decided to go out to relax.
I later found out that the guy was her cousin who I'm yet to meet but the point now, is how could she act creazily like that the other day embarrassing me and my client and accusing me too.
We've not spoken for like 4days now looking for who will be the first person to appologise.
the thing is I love this girl and wouldn't want to loose her. But I didn't do anything bad to appologise cos I sent her a text to intimate her of my where about but she didn't tell me where she was going to.
Should I be the one to appologise to cos I was really embarrased that day or should I wait for her to do so cos she's at fault her from my own judgment.
Kindly advice me cos I've been loosing my mind since.

bro from experience take ur stand before u marry her, what ever u cant take after marriage dont accept it now,she is bossy and wants to always be incharge im married and im suffering that right now ,trying hard to correct but its not easy ,u can apologise for d slap because realmen dont hit women ,but do it in a very matured way ,by letting her know she was at fault by those behaviours she exibited.

Maybe both of you should break up.
Ok,maybe not yet.

You both need more emotional maturity though especially as you wish to settle down soon.You shouldn't have slapped her,you should have just left the scene.
She on her part needs to cool down to settle issues if not she'll just be boiling everywhere.She ought to have known your kind of job and what it entails in the first place.She should ask questions.

Try to make peace.Apologise to her but most importantly,talk to each other more and I mean communicate.

That girl na confirm werey ooo. Person call you make you look around, instead of keeping cool you begin fight.


Oga wait for elders, they are coming to advise.

That slapping part of the issue might take you to do the needful, though anger could make someone misbehaves but you should have left the scene since your fiancee had started demonstrating her hidden attitude. To make the issue solvable, you could go ahead and apologize with the involvement of her cousin that was present in the ugly moment. Good luck to you since you still love her!

I am not after whether you should be the first to apologise or not. I am mad at you for leaving the business that brought you to the hotel for relationship matter which has caused you a prospective client. Next time learn not to mix business with pleasure.

Ain't talk'n much but, Whatever cost you your peace of mind dump it!

Some girls are somehow sha, you see your guy with a girl in public and went crazy, god forbid bad thing, even if he is truly cheating, why react like that when single guys never finish, just apologise for slapping her, then end the relationship, single ladies never finish too.

There's nothing wrong if you appologise first.

Raising ur filthy hand on her is very bad...as for dat ur babe,she is very very very stupid..she came out with her other boyfriend and u both met.she acted up like u were the bad person...let her go.she's cheating on u,and will forever do it.

when u said u slapped her, I weak!
if u must do something rough, just shake her vigorously! no d slap people anyhow!

you know what to do next right!

You messed up by slapping her! So apologize to her if you really want her as a wife. At least you satisfied your conscience by knowing that she was with her cousin and not a stranger.

Why did you call her to turn around, when you were with a client?

Forget the blind love you are currently possessed with, open your eyes and see clearly. Ask yourself, would you be able to cope with a hot-tempered and crazily jealous wife?

If your answer is NO, please do the needful now before you will later come and seek for advise on Nairaland.

Some people nairaland self..I know most of u will capitalize on that slap of a thing..

@ op, never apologize first, if you do, ur ego is ruined forever and it would hunt you

Your fiancée is crazily insecure. Go and apologize for slapping her but nothing else, you both should talk about everything that happened and make her understand where she's at fault.

Are you sure you want to get married to that lady?
She went off on you like that why exactly? I mean you called her and called her attention to where you were with the client. So she's implying that you called her to watch you cheating on her.
op you need to investigate further to determine if that dude was really her cousin. This could just be an act to shift attention away from her.
Anyway was the client that hot?

Ningen:
Go and apologize for not slapping her harder.
That's your only offence.

She cost you a client, ruined your reputation and doesn't even trust you at all. Use your brain oga.

True .......


That's the essence of communication in relationships.....

Lmaoooo...

These yeye stories never cease to amaze me.

If you're gonna tell some punkass stories,at least be creative naaaaa...


These ones are generic and boring

sweerychick:
You messed up by slapping her! So apologize to her if you really want her as a wife. At least you satisfied your conscience by knowing that she was with her cousin and not a stranger.

Apologize ko...apolocognosy ni...

She is not wife material.

Though the story is fake.

Raydans:
You should apologize only for the singular act of slapping her and at the same time make her realize she deserved it and it was all her fault for not patient enough to understand the situation on ground. Make her understand such attitude is a redflag for you and she needs to work on it

Lol,he should apologize? What of the crazy girl?

DaInferno:
when u said u slapped her, I weak!
if u must do something rough, just shake her vigorously! no d slap people anyhow!

you know what to do next right!

Shake her


I remember back in secondary school when guys in my set were on girls slapping rampage, the girls did report always, one guy den decided to be knocking instead of slapping

Rozz:
some ladies don't have shame,fighting publicly because of a man,dont apologize to her but for the slap alone you can ,you are not at fault here but stop raising your hands on women else it becomes a habit that will eventually ruin you

Lol...you seemed quiet on this one when you heard OP sabi slap.

No.worry babe,i won't beat you

op, don't apologize. your GF is at fault. that's how cheating begins. she disrespect you in front of your client. she was acting crazy trying to turn the table around. let her go if she wants to go and don't listen to those people telling you to apologize because you slap her. sometimes, some gf need slap to reformat their brain. I must say your wife to be is dramatic and she has this cheating tendencies.