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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met (76265 Views)
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Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Therapyken(m): 1:30pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Testimony1988:That her biological parents were not legally married is clearly not enough reason for her father to continue to hide the identity or whereabouts of her real mother from her until now. There seems to be more to the story. And in my opinion, harsh life experiences really do not guarantee that one becomes a "better person" as you put it, however it is noteworthy that she sustained through her ordeal. 1 Like |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Godfullsam(m): 1:30pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
richie240: It may not be a fake story.. Women are known to always contradict themselves. That is why it is often said that most women don't know what they want.. 3 Likes |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by nnewa: 1:32pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
What a cross. But since you have survived all these years and the quest us burning in your heart, I believe you are nearing your closure. But from your source, encourage her to reach out to your real mum if she knows her link (or her blood relations) and explain your desire to be complete. In order not to be seen as having revealed what incidentally your family didn't want to tell you (probably as a face/name saving action), your mum's people can also initiate moves from their end. Gods grace |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Tonyekanem(m): 1:32pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
What if your mother was/is a Rev. Sister? |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Goalnaldo(m): 1:33pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Ishilove:whaaaat! ![]() |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by tunize(m): 1:34pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
private investigator ko....Same person that told u, should be able to tell u everytn or bttr still go to ur fathers village the root and start the tracing from there. |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Unified07: 1:35pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Somethings are better kept unknown 1 Like |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by fof1: 1:36pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28: YES, U NEED HER. RICH OR POOR UR MOTHER IS UR MOTHER. DON'T MIND UR SELFISH VINDICTIVE FATHER. May God help U discuss her. Ur Father may be Responsible for her Flight. Keep on Searching and Let God grant You Favour to her Discovery... Happy Sunday Girl. U are not alone. 1 Like |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by petitejolie(f): 1:36pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28:ah....which kind papa be that. U need to police protection . Is he a well connected person? And hope ure financially independent |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by omorttee4u(m): 1:37pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
I believe you are going through so much right now. Pls don't take every advise given to you on this forum. Most of tthem may have side effect that wil taunt you later. My take is this : fist of all, the person revealing the secret to you, find out the clue given to you were you true from someone else. Story like., is it true my cousin is the same mother as mine. If you can get that from someone else, the person will surely give you another clue. It must be step by step. You have to calm down, like you lost the hope already. Live a normal life. Once again take it slowly...... 2 Likes |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by fof1: 1:37pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28: YES, U NEED HER. RICH OR POOR UR MOTHER IS UR MOTHER. DON'T MIND UR SELFISH VINDICTIVE FATHER. May God help U discover her. Ur Father may be Responsible for her Flight. Keep on Searching and Let God grant You Favour to her Discovery... Happy Sunday Girl. U are not alone. Be Guided Pl. |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by brainhgeek(m): 1:37pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
I doubt if she is your step mother. She is better refered to as your foster mother, at least, for now. You don't have any evidence your dad was married to another women apart from your foster mother. Why don't you go to the distant relative who told you to reveal your mum's identity. The person should have some info that can help you. I am sure your mum's relative will be watching from afar too. |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Maobichek: 1:38pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28:. The first thing to do is to calm down ok, try and summon courage from your inner being and you will triumph. something happened to me and I contemplated suicide but that night I couldn't but before I slept off, I told God that if I woke up the next morning; it means that He loves me and have a great plan for me and by His grace, I woke up the next morning and I'm good now. Please be calm first, don't kill yourself. have you finished high institution? are you working or into business? build yourself and be strong first, your mom where about will surely be a thing of the past soon. Don't go public but I private investigator or someone who knows your family very well can help you but first be calm and explore other means than contemplating suicide ok, thank you. |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Flav(m): 1:38pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
I have read your post and all the replies. Based on the information you provided on dowry. I believe you are from the south east or south south. My advise to you is to be very careful with your quest. Let it not drown you. Your finding your mum should be a secret only you knows. Don't ask your Dad about it any more, don't sue him, don't ask your siblings. This is inother not block any trace of you finding out who your mum is by your dad and relatives. I think a blood covenant must have been involved in the secrecy. In these region's I mentioned, returning of bride price is regarded as a bad omen sometimes. By keeping it a secret from your people, they will think you got tired and no longer interested in finding your mum. You will be doing the finding secretly. I don't know how old you are, I would suggest you take a surprise visit to your village. But you will stay in hotel in the town. Before you travel, find out about the King or traditional ruler of your village and their wives. Also get information on who the women leader is. There is always an elderly woman who controls women affairs in these villages. Your best bet is to go through the king's wife or the women leader. Buy a gift while going, like wrapper or perfume etc. Your first trip will be to meet with the women I mentioned above. Tell them you are writing a project or thesis about your family geology or family or family tree. They are women, they won't harm you. It might involve you taken several trips to your village depending on the outcome of the first visit. Go with a book and something you can record with. You will be shocked the amount information you will get. You might be lucky and get the information on your first visit. I you get information on these people e.g their contacts. You can start the communication from Abuja. Note: it's project you doing. Keep your plan and story away from social media until you find your mum. Your siblings might be reading your post for all know. Including your step mum. Then you can share the story. I pray it will be a happy ending. I don't know if you have watched the movie. Catch me if you can.(Leonardo DiCaprio). Play that role in this your quest. I wish you luck. 4 Likes |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Daisythof: 1:39pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28: So your real mum was the usurper who wanted to destroy the marriage between your step mum and your dad? No wonder they tried to erase every detail about her. 1 Like |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by sango147(m): 1:40pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Maybe your step mum sister is your real mum Godlovesyou28: 2 Likes |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Ishilove: 1:41pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Onyi22:It will fire you first before it gets to me. |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Parisian: 1:42pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Listen to me and make sure you do this. Go back to the person that told you the truth. Plead with the person to divulge the information and promise it will be a secret between the both of you and that your on you will never tell your dad no matter what. If possible make a monetary pledge and fulfill it after you're told. If and when she tells you and you find the woman. Before you fully accept her as your mother, be sure to run a DNA test for confirmation first. That's because i watched a documentary where a woman falsely claimed to be the mother of a long lost child but dna proved she wasn't the mother. Godlovesyou28: 1 Like |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by chukel(m): 1:45pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Emrixx:that step mum did her Dad a huge favor that year. It's no juju. He owes her. |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Samfloxin(m): 1:47pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
[quote author=Godlovesyou28 post=89786879] I have been to my village twice (my grandpa's burial and sisters traditional wedding)since I was born and we never spent up to 48hours on both visit. We were also lucked up in my dads house (especially me), we only come out supervised and closely watched since my dad say everyone there is a witch or wizard. Come to think about it; I should trace that village. Please are you private investigator? If yes please may I know how you can assist and the financial implications.[/quote Please be careful in your quest so that you don't fall into the hands of fraudstewrs, ritualists and the likes. Look for help from that area you are. U don't know who is who on nairaland. May you find love you are looking for and may God soften your heart on your decision on marriage 1 Like |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by chukel(m): 1:49pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28:if you got all this info from someone, I don't know what else you want on NL. That informant has every answer you want. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Lawsimon(m): 1:51pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Always show your step mom gratitude for bringing you up in the right way Are you not better than your step siblings today? Look you today, you have good home training. You can manage your home well unlike your step siblings who where pampered. Though she hated you, but she really helped you to become a better person today. God may have designed it that way in order to help you. 3 Likes |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Zenithpeak(m): 1:52pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28: Is your dad a politician? Is he a former governor of a state in the south west? |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Halfamilli: 1:53pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
I'm my pen opinion, I think you should; 1. Know the exact place and your real date of birth, the house address of your parent when you were born 2. Go to the neighborhood in a stealth mode, as anyone that would be nice enough to tell you anything about your dad... I suggest a long time enemy/friend 3. Try to be diplomatic as much as possible in what whatever you want to ask or engage some expert 4. Make sure you are nice to those people 5. If you are a Christian pray for God's direction, this should be no one but I don't know if you are an atheist. 6. Know who to ask Or 1. Take them to community elders forum( I don't like this though) 2. Get him drunk and ask him ( not suitable) 3. Visit shrine, I got a good location for you. As real nigga, you don't ask the modest guy where they sell kush when you first enter the town. Best of luck |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by prinj(m): 1:53pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Please help me, I can't bear knowing I have a mother out there and not know who she is. Please help! Well my sister, I am have carefully read your episode and the directive comments over your predicament seeking for help. All I can comment here is this 1. You are seeking for your mum and your Dad has never allowed you to have an access over your mum that is very sad and an eyes opening after some many ago. It is an eyes opening that all is not well, your mum too might have been seeking for a way to have an access on you but she never been allowed or maybe your Dad might have put her in a precarious circumstances and you say '' your Dad can kill over the matter'' my dear you need to be careful otherwise your Dad and your step mum can decide to silent you in other to inherit of give your property to your siblings 2. You have have talked, begged, cried and incessantly pleaded for access to see your mum but nothing has happened. All those you have consulted have refused to shew you or helped you out rather they keep refer you back to your Dad that is to open your eyes that the people know the kind of person your father is. So you need to thread with caution. 3. There are situations we handle with radical and though hand while some others we handle emotions so I suggest that if you want to unleash hidden secrets over your circumstances and get your mum, consider sue your Dad after arrested but she doing that still consult private investigator for more chiidn truth 4. An above all, don't hesitate to pray because prayer is everything 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by SirBunky85(m): 1:53pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
sinaj:sense plenty for ur head |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by SirBunky85(m): 1:57pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28:why hasnt ur dad killed the relative who told you abt your mum?it's like you aren't serious |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by BananaPeel(m): 1:57pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28:You need a close-knit relationship with Jesus. He will comfort you and you won't despair. If you know how to sing,go into a moment of worshipping God in your closet. Seek out Jesus personally and he will come to you with the answers you need. He will come through for you if you will do what I ask you to. And when you finally see your mum, you will be glad you did. 1 Like |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Nobody: 1:57pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28: You might be a product of incest and that makes revealing your mum will be very difficult. Cos if it's so difficult for your dad to reveal to you at your age, their is more to it beyond hate. 4 Likes |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Zenithpeak(m): 1:59pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Daisythof: How is that the child's fault? Or how on earth does that justify the identity theft? How would your line of thought proffer solutions to her present predicaments? |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Nobody: 1:59pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Godlovesyou28: Oh! He doesn't even want you search and get it to public space. Trust me their is more it. You might even go more depressed if you finally get to know. I believe he is protecting you. He has nothing to lose if all things are being equal. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Please Help: How Do You Find A Mother You Have Never Met by Testimony1988(m): 2:00pm On Jul 19, 2020 |
Therapyken:Hahahaha, in this case case her experience was not that harsh. |
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