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How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? - Family (8) - Nairaland

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Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by RPG2020(m): 7:56pm On Sep 02, 2020
merieam16:
I feel ur pain bro buh wat exactly do u want us to do

Brother need our help middle East need our help Nigeria need our help Buhari need your help
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Asiseeit: 7:57pm On Sep 02, 2020
corpershun:


100 naira “rubber” woulda saved us this epistle.

Bringing children into the world without proper planning. I just pray God sustains that lil girl.

Shit happens man, even with best laid plans. The words "mistake", "error", "insurance", "lawyers" etc are real. Everyone experience it, just in varying degrees.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Masterdazhem: 7:57pm On Sep 02, 2020
Really sound advice

Regardless:
Lol. You should be happy she started displaying her real character that would have surfaced if you marry her. Of course, she think say everything don balance since she has a child for you and you don't want a broken home.

My advice - talk to her heart to heart and give her a specific time frame in your heart for her to change. In fact, you should even withhold more money as this would show you how she'll behave during the hard times. She may even be a potential cheat - most materialistic females are.

Now if she doesn't change within your set time frame in your heart, my guy run o. Only make sure you provide enough for your daughter.. A home can never be productive with this kind of woman in the house. Value your peace of mind above everything.
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by merieam16(f): 7:58pm On Sep 02, 2020
loneprof:


Keep showing immaturity with unnecessary response. You don't want to be corrected just because you're online. And I know you're not really Yoruba with your "iranu" cos my own Yoruba people are wiser and have the right words to use.

Continue insulting people up and down.
And continuing showing ur idiocy by not minding ur business.Agbaya
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by RealEzee(m): 7:59pm On Sep 02, 2020
But u r not married to her na
Let her stay with her parents n u will visiting her n send upkeep money from time to time, ur pikin is still urs no doubt, no let woman tear u apart ooo.
Thank goodness she don dey use herself
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by loko50(m): 8:00pm On Sep 02, 2020
This are the consequences of premarital sex
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Aw007(m): 8:01pm On Sep 02, 2020
dangerousdaddy:
Good evening people. Please don't mind my English. My post is actually out of pains and frustration and i may not type with the correct words.

I'm a 31 years old guy. I'm actually very bad with spending because when i have money, whoever asks from me gets. I am under alot of pressure lately especially from those around me. I am the 1st child of my parents and have so many responsibilities. Let her go if she continues this way at least she should understand you are still managing

I got my girlfriend pregnant and she moved in with me. My parents were never there for me so i vowed i was going to be there for my kids. Hence i do all i can to make sure my daughter and her mum are OK.

The girl in question is a torn in my flesh. Totally different from when we were dating without a child. Nowadays, as soon as i get my salary, she wants to buy this, she wants to buy that even though she knows i receive less than a 100k and i have multiple loans i am paying back because we moved out of our old apartment due to space constraints especially after she delivered.

Whenever i don't have money, there is never a happy moment in my home. But if i come home and bring money, we become very good friends. She wants to live a good life which is not wrong but I feel when she knows how i am managing, she ought to understand and bear with me.

The last straw that broke the camel's back was, i was yet to be paid, i had 700 with me. I gave her to make some food because we had the basic food stuff in the house.... Rice, beans, ogbono, spaghetti, garri, Egusi.... Palm oil. So basically all she had to buy was fish or something to put inside the food.

I came home after a hard day at work and met an empty kitchen. When I asked for my food, she asked me what i expected her to cook with 700 naira. I got so mad and left the house but since it was late (it was close to midnight), i decided to come back. In my anger, i started asking her why she's treating me badly. And the next thing is, she called her mum to say I'm fighting with her and that i pushed her to the ground. Her mum replied and said that if anything happens to her daughter, she would hold me responsible. That she didn't give me a wife......

Now I feel i should just end everything and let's go our separate ways before it becomes a case of domestic violence. I never want to see my child grow up to see me fighting with her mum always and being unhappy. I believe a child that grows up in an unhappy home is always at a disadvantage. Please help me guys. I am in pains.

I hope this makes front page
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Ybaby: 8:03pm On Sep 02, 2020
dangerousdaddy:
Good evening people. Please don't mind my English. My post is actually out of pains and frustration and i may not type with the correct words.

I'm a 31 years old guy. I'm actually very bad with spending because when i have money, whoever asks from me gets. I am under alot of pressure lately especially from those around me. I am the 1st child of my parents and have so many responsibilities.

I got my girlfriend pregnant and she moved in with me. My parents were never there for me so i vowed i was going to be there for my kids. Hence i do all i can to make sure my daughter and her mum are OK.

The girl in question is a torn in my flesh. Totally different from when we were dating without a child. Nowadays, as soon as i get my salary, she wants to buy this, she wants to buy that even though she knows i receive less than a 100k and i have multiple loans i am paying back because we moved out of our old apartment due to space constraints especially after she delivered.

Whenever i don't have money, there is never a happy moment in my home. But if i come home and bring money, we become very good friends. She wants to live a good life which is not wrong but I feel when she knows how i am managing, she ought to understand and bear with me.

The last straw that broke the camel's back was, i was yet to be paid, i had 700 with me. I gave her to make some food because we had the basic food stuff in the house.... Rice, beans, ogbono, spaghetti, garri, Egusi.... Palm oil. So basically all she had to buy was fish or something to put inside the food.

I came home after a hard day at work and met an empty kitchen. When I asked for my food, she asked me what i expected her to cook with 700 naira. I got so mad and left the house but since it was late (it was close to midnight), i decided to come back. In my anger, i started asking her why she's treating me badly. And the next thing is, she called her mum to say I'm fighting with her and that i pushed her to the ground. Her mum replied and said that if anything happens to her daughter, she would hold me responsible. That she didn't give me a wife......

Now I feel i should just end everything and let's go our separate ways before it becomes a case of domestic violence. I never want to see my child grow up to see me fighting with her mum always and being unhappy. I believe a child that grows up in an unhappy home is always at a disadvantage. Please help me guys. I am in pains.

I hope this makes front page

Anyone that prays the man that impregnates thier daughter will give her 700N to cook soup - raise your hand let me say Amen!

A kilo of Titus is N1100. If she buys half kilo for N550 she will buy rodo N100 and use the ogbono at home, then cook it for free for a man who has not paid a single dowry on her head and yet used her womb to bring his lineage forth. Her labour is N50

E ti mad but no one to tell you.

You are a manipulator how can you drop 700 for food and still say you had a hardworking day? Hardwork picking beans or what? Baba arrange yourself biko... hardworking men will never drop N700.


she has over given to you that is you are indebted to her. You need to stop playing the victim and go get some money.... baba hustle! You now have a child to look after and let me remind you she is not your wife: she does not owe you any sacrificial love because thier is no contract.


1 problem here: she is not your wife

2 problem here: your income needs to be increased ASAP.

Waiting for you people' s amen and any silly girl who is sleeping with a man who can barely look after himself - do you want to scatter his life ?
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Thanos1000: 8:07pm On Sep 02, 2020
Decimus:
Why did you impregnate a jobless girl?
you get sense.....
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by bigcee(m): 8:08pm On Sep 02, 2020
Bluntguy:
You are seeking for advice now because you don't have money in your pockets at the moment. Once you receive your pay now, she will welcome you home warmly and you will forget you ever asked for advice concerning her.
Now here is my advice:
Be patient till the next payday, you will soon smile again. Olodo!!!
grin

Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by sugah: 8:11pm On Sep 02, 2020
UjuJoan2:


Why are so upset? undecided

Getting pregnant before marriage is irresponsible, and any woman putting herself in that position should be prepared to face the consequences!

Any man who's irresponsible enough to impregnate a woman without money should also suffer the consequences.

Upset because I dont like sufferhead? grin grin I hope she bought herself meat pie and lacasera with the 700 naira sef...if the money can even buy that grin grin

3 Likes

Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by DarkJeddi(m): 8:14pm On Sep 02, 2020
GreenArrow1:
Be glad that this is happening now. While everybody may condemn the lady, y'all should please note she might still be teachable.
Hmmm.. grin
Teachable? shocked
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by 12345baba(m): 8:14pm On Sep 02, 2020
Regardless:
Lol. You should be happy she started displaying her real character that would have surfaced if you marry her. Of course, she think say everything don balance since she has a child for you and you don't want a broken home.

My advice - talk to her heart to heart and give her a specific time frame in your heart for her to change. In fact, you should even withhold more money as this would show you how she'll behave during the hard times. She may even be a potential cheat - most materialistic females are.

Now if she doesn't change within your set time frame in your heart, my guy run o. Only make sure you provide enough for your daughter.. A home can never be productive with this kind of woman in the house. Value your peace of mind above everything.
time frame? So that she can pour him hot water one day.
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Deborah98(f): 8:15pm On Sep 02, 2020
Oga settle her and let her go but let your daughter be in your custody Biko, what kind of woman will sit at home all day and point whatever she wants and it will be provided for her,you know you haven't married and you have every right to quit the relationship but taking care of your child should be your Paramount responsibility, wait no further,delay might be deadly seriously before it's turns out to be a case of domestic violence,this kind of people can frustrate their fellow humans but I pray she won't frustrate you, it's well...
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by andepower: 8:16pm On Sep 02, 2020
Guy, I made a terrible mistake as a married man when my wife was pregnant and was to me, misbehaving. She was not misbehaving but only acting on the hormonal distortion when pregnant. My candid advice is that you go out of your way and be happy with her even with the way she behaves so that you do not lose the child like I did of my two twins. A word is enough for the wise. Ennjoy






dangerousdaddy:
Good evening people. Please don't mind my English. My post is actually out of pains and frustration and i may not type with the correct words.

I'm a 31 years old guy. I'm actually very bad with spending because when i have money, whoever asks from me gets. I am under alot of pressure lately especially from those around me. I am the 1st child of my parents and have so many responsibilities.

I got my girlfriend pregnant and she moved in with me. My parents were never there for me so i vowed i was going to be there for my kids. Hence i do all i can to make sure my daughter and her mum are OK.

The girl in question is a torn in my flesh. Totally different from when we were dating without a child. Nowadays, as soon as i get my salary, she wants to buy this, she wants to buy that even though she knows i receive less than a 100k and i have multiple loans i am paying back because we moved out of our old apartment due to space constraints especially after she delivered.

Whenever i don't have money, there is never a happy moment in my home. But if i come home and bring money, we become very good friends. She wants to live a good life which is not wrong but I feel when she knows how i am managing, she ought to understand and bear with me.

The last straw that broke the camel's back was, i was yet to be paid, i had 700 with me. I gave her to make some food because we had the basic food stuff in the house.... Rice, beans, ogbono, spaghetti, garri, Egusi.... Palm oil. So basically all she had to buy was fish or something to put inside the food.

I came home after a hard day at work and met an empty kitchen. When I asked for my food, she asked me what i expected her to cook with 700 naira. I got so mad and left the house but since it was late (it was close to midnight), i decided to come back. In my anger, i started asking her why she's treating me badly. And the next thing is, she called her mum to say I'm fighting with her and that i pushed her to the ground. Her mum replied and said that if anything happens to her daughter, she would hold me responsible. That she didn't give me a wife......

Now I feel i should just end everything and let's go our separate ways before it becomes a case of domestic violence. I never want to see my child grow up to see me fighting with her mum always and being unhappy. I believe a child that grows up in an unhappy home is always at a disadvantage. Please help me guys. I am in pains.

I hope this makes front page

1 Like

Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by ugodson(m): 8:17pm On Sep 02, 2020
I was in dat situation b4,d mistake I made was to still stay still she gave me 2other kids now we are separated and she is with d kids.
My candid advice is to get a separation b4 she starts sleeping around/ u start beating her infront of the children.
Good luck my brother
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by profmallor: 8:20pm On Sep 02, 2020
You are obviously a peace loving man that may not be compatible with her personality, every woman appreciates been given money, however there might be underlining issues that you may have avoided mentioning. If what you seek is a peaceful home, there is much work for you to do. A peaceful home must come with mutual understanding with both parties working meticulously towards such, provided you are people of like minds. Can 2 walk together except they agree. If on the other hand its a case of just befriending each other which accidentally led to pregnancy you might need to rethink settling down with her regardless of your child's perceived happiness. You must consider your peace of mind first. You might have to let her return to her house and re calibrate your mistakes, perhaps she might also learn to appreciate your gestures then you can find a way to meet in the middle. Do not marry out of fear or pity.
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by maxiuc(m): 8:20pm On Sep 02, 2020
Guys do make this mistake why?

If you impregnate her Doesn't mean you must marry her
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by deltaprincess(f): 8:22pm On Sep 02, 2020
Ybaby:


Anyone that prays the man that impregnates thier daughter will give her 700N to cook soup - raise your hand let me say Amen!

A kilo of Titus is N1100. If she buys half kilo for N550 she will buy redo N100 and use the ogbono at home, then cook it for free for a man who has not paid a single dowry on her head and yet used her womb to bring his lineage forth. Her labour is N50

E ti mad but no one to tell you.

You are a manipulator how can you drop 700 for food and still say you had a hardworking day? Hardwork picking beans or what? Baba arrange yourself biko... hardworking men will never drop N700.


she has over given to you that is you are indebted to her. You need to stop playing the victim and go get some money.... baba hustle! You now have a child to look after and let me remind you she is not your wife: she does not owe you any sacrificial love because thier is no contract.


1 problem here: she is not your wife

2 problem here: your income needs to be increased ASAP.

Waiting for you people' s amen and any silly girl who is sleeping with a man who can barely look after himself - do you want to scatter his life ?

Pathetic.

The lady needs to return to her parents home. In fact I am beginning to wonder what right thinking parents will allow their daughter live in a man's home without wedlock. It speaks volume of her upbringing....

Send her back to her parents home and provide just enough for your daughter and let your baby mama depend on her parents.

Otherwise you will live to regret it.

Your responsibility is to your daughter and not your babymama.

No matter how little you send to your daughter, it will be enough. Just have a rough estimate of her monthly meals, disposable sanitary wears (pampers) and spare change.

Trust me this is the only way.

You need your space and sanity.

1 Like

Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Excuses: 8:22pm On Sep 02, 2020
Bluntguy:
You are seeking for advice now because you don't have money in your pockets at the moment. Once you receive your pay now, she will welcome you home warmly and you will forget you ever asked for advice concerning her.
Now here is my advice:
Be patient till the next payday, you will soon smile again. Olodo!!!


What kind of advice is this...is everything money dependent?

OP people change..especially women..you should know what to do..
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Dalby(m): 8:22pm On Sep 02, 2020
merieam16:
I feel ur pain bro buh wat exactly do u want us to do

Person no fit ask for advise again
grin grin grin
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by merieam16(f): 8:24pm On Sep 02, 2020
Dalby:

Person no fit ask for advise again grin grin grin
Lolz..
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Tzar(m): 8:28pm On Sep 02, 2020
You need to seat your woman down & explain things exactly how you have explained to us on Nairaland.
100k or less will be tough to sustain a household of three in today’s Nigeria.
If she isn’t working, she needs to get a job to support your efforts in the house.
You can also involve someone she respects to talk to her if all you efforts to talk sense into her head fails.
If after you try your best & things don’t improve, you can let her go. Nobody is worth your unhappiness.
Also, you can be a good father to your child without having to live with the mum ( if she refuses to change). Avoid domestic violence & seek your happiness & that of your child.
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by arewacrown50000: 8:28pm On Sep 02, 2020
Does she know how much you earn in a month
Include her in your salary scale
Tell her you want to save so so amount in a month and let her know how much you budget for food
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by dangerousdaddy(m): 8:29pm On Sep 02, 2020
Ybaby:


Anyone that prays the man that impregnates thier daughter will give her 700N to cook soup - raise your hand let me say Amen!

A kilo of Titus is N1100. If she buys half kilo for N550 she will buy rodo N100 and use the ogbono at home, then cook it for free for a man who has not paid a single dowry on her head and yet used her womb to bring his lineage forth. Her labour is N50

E ti mad but no one to tell you.

You are a manipulator how can you drop 700 for food and still say you had a hardworking day? Hardwork picking beans or what? Baba arrange yourself biko... hardworking men will never drop N700.


she has over given to you that is you are indebted to her. You need to stop playing the victim and go get some money.... baba hustle! You now have a child to look after and let me remind you she is not your wife: she does not owe you any sacrificial love because thier is no contract.


1 problem here: she is not your wife

2 problem here: your income needs to be increased ASAP.

Waiting for you people' s amen and any silly girl who is sleeping with a man who can barely look after himself - do you want to scatter his life ?
..... I have a job that i work till 11am,how else do you want me to hustle?? And with which time??
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Edusouls(m): 8:31pm On Sep 02, 2020
Ur funny girl, how many Nigerian women are working productively? Most are just parasites waiting for a man to feed on..
elantraceey:
You should be glad you have not married her yet. But I have one question. Is she jobless?
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by dangerousdaddy(m): 8:32pm On Sep 02, 2020
fof1:


DID YOU PUSH HER DOWN OR NOT? OUT OF ANGER OR FRUSTRATION? IF U DID, U ERRED BADLY. PLS APOLOGISE IMMEDIATELY AND PROMISE URSELF TO BE MORE RESPONSIBLE IN HANDLING UR ANGER. BUT WHERE U DID NOT,AND SHE LIED AGAINST YOU. THAT IS A DANGEROUS WOMAN IN D MAKING, AVOID HER PLS. U ARE NOT YET MARRIED, SO RETRACE UR STEPS,PLS.
.... I have never and will never go physical against a woman. I didn't push her down
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by vickydevoka(m): 8:33pm On Sep 02, 2020
ecomalchemist:
Na you Bleep up.

How you go impregnate woman wey no get job or business, what were you expecting ?

Even me as a guy, when I no get money...I dey always vex with myself.

You need to understand that Nigerian women and money are like Siamese twins, Once there's no money, their true colors comes out and relationship without money bitter like AGBO.

As it is now, if you want to have peace of mind send her back to her mother then occasionally send upkeep money, you'd be fine.

As a young man with that Kain woman, your lifespan go reduce.. use your head !

Stay blessedm.
U de right. Buh na dem Sabi open leg. U hardly see a busy gal flirting around
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by vickydevoka(m): 8:37pm On Sep 02, 2020
My brother if I be u. I don chase her since. I hate nice guys. I no need to tell woman way de jobless to find work, even if na bonce make she sell. If na me as my salary enter na so I go de bone face de find fault for everything way she do.
Leave her if she want make she carry de daughter make dat one no worry u. For my place na until u pay money untop woman head na en be say de pikin na ur own
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Martinez39s(m): 8:41pm On Sep 02, 2020
..... space booked for resting spot. Keep scrolling.

Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by mechanics(m): 8:44pm On Sep 02, 2020
That's what you get when he get a lady pregnant without doing the needful, you shouldn't have done that, you should have waited for the time you are ready, then pray for the right one.
Re: How Do I Handle This Kind Of Woman? by Buffalo2(m): 8:44pm On Sep 02, 2020
Call it quit asap. With this kind of lady, it will be difficult for you to make it in life. Sorry for being blunt

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