Ever8090:
Bross,.if I vex for you this morning you no go like am,.hunger dey tear people, one onion now is 200 naira, ASU is on strike, Army dey deny say them no kill people for leki gate,bag of rice is 40,000 and Christmas is around the corner only for you to carry burial matter come dey worry us this morning....

Come you no base for this country?...

DennisEche:
Oboy not a good sign at all, knowing how women brain works. I have seen and been with women that got bleepedd yet received phone call from their lovers pretending as if nothing happened. Even going as far as telling the caller" I love you baby" and person is untop riding her.

delishpot:
If you are a kind and understanding husband and she hid this from you it means she is a crazy woman for that moment. On the other hand, some Hitler husband's are not told some things due to the wife or kids already predicting what their answers will be and she knows that if he gives a negative answer she will not be able to defy it so she just goes without telling.
Op, would you have let her go if she had told you about it? Cos some men like to control their wives as if she is an idiot who has no personal feelings and opinion so in that case, she might sieze the opportunity your absence brings and sneak to the burial esp if the relative is special to he heart.
I will not say more until I hear your wife's side of the story.

jidamsel43 nice and the best actionpost=96059450:
You don't need to rush to make a hasty decision on this because many 'strange' things happen in a marriage that requires wisdom and patience. I began to realize some things recently when I got married which made me conclude that Marriage is full of strange and peculiar situations. Since my marriage late last year, my tolerance, patience, forbearance have increased. I have been to a point of raising my hand to hit her but I deployed caution and restraint. There is no issue or circumstance in a marriage that surpasses the use of patience and wisdom.

Back to the issue at hand, call your wife and inquire why she decided to embark on the journey without your permission. if she gives you a convincing response, please let it slide down like that. Anybody that tells you to come hard on your wife just wants to destabilize your happy home. If your wife's reason is reasonable to some extent, you have to accept her and just warn her not to take the unilateral decision again.

I have been confronted with issues more serious than this. My wife and I are still together better and stronger. There is no perfect man or woman.

We are just managing ourselves

Akanoaaa:
You wife went to introduce the kids to their real father, if you know you know.

hadex90:
Well OP, I sense you don't really like your wife going for ceremony with her family. She's not free with you, hence the reason she travelled without your permission. You need to work on your relationship with her and her family and please don't forget that as your wife, her responsibility is not to you alone but also to her family. My 1kobo experience

Souqwaqif:
Dear All,

Greetings from here. Just needing a piece of positive counsel here. It has been subtle and recurrent but I decided to share this particular one.

My wife travelled for a burial with my kids without my knowledge. I travelled far away for work and call home everyday. Just recently I called very early in the morning to tell my wife I will be coming home by weekend,she somewhat sounded surprised and said instead of me coming on Friday I should come on Sunday.

I didn't say anything,I pretended not to be angry with that. Yet I immediately did a cash transfer for feeding and balance for the kids school fees that same morning we were discussing.

Later in the evening,I expected her to call and update me on the fees payment,but I didn't receive any call,I then had to call but her lines were all switched off,at this point I was worried especially when I couldn't talk to the kids.

I then called a neighbor to help me check if they are at home only to confirm they travelled for burial which the neighbor got to know from a phone conversation between my wife and her sister.

At this point, I called my wife's brother only to confirm that they were having a burial in their village, which I am not aware of,even as an inlaw.

Right now am very upset and I don't want to act in anger,please how can I react to this conspiracy between her and her family carrying my car with my kids to a distant village for burial without my knowledge.

Thanks for mature inputs only:

donestk:
All these talk to her talk to her gang, you think you're in Canada.

This is Africa, you paid through your nose to marry her.

What she deserve is a hot slap and apology.

jidamsel43:
You don't need to rush to make a hasty decision on this because many 'strange' things happen in a marriage that requires wisdom and patience. I began to realize some things recently when I got married which made me conclude that Marriage is full of strange and peculiar situations. Since my marriage late last year, my tolerance, patience, forbearance have increased. I have been to a point of raising my hand to hit her but I deployed caution and restraint. There is no issue or circumstance in a marriage that surpasses the use of patience and wisdom.

Back to the issue at hand, call your wife and inquire why she decided to embark on the journey without your permission. if she gives you a convincing response, please let it slide down like that. Anybody that tells you to come hard on your wife just wants to destabilize your happy home. If your wife's reason is reasonable to some extent, you have to accept her and just warn her not to take the unilateral decision again.

I have been confronted with issues more serious than this. My wife and I are still together better and stronger. There is no perfect man or woman.

We are just managing ourselves

A305:
You wife knew, you wouldn't have granted your consent for such a risky journey (with the kids) in your absence, so she took the advice of whosoever she's with to go on the trip anyway.

This is just one of the shi t test women test a man with, to know how weak or alpha the man is.


I'm sorry to inform you that; Sir, you have previously failed all her other shi t tests (when dating her or in your marriage) before this recent advanced test she pulled on you. It means, you are losing frame as the man of the house or even lost frame already.

So what can you do sir?

NOTHING, if you want your marriage to last; Absolutely nothing because she already crossed the line, you can't just kick her out now because she has your kids and she hasn't cheated yet. But there is a glimmer of hope, and what is it?

Turn your alpha mode on - First, Send away any of her relative living in your house.

Turn off your lovey dovey demeanor or shut down your happy attitude towards her when she goes against your rules.

Always repeat your rules to her at all times.

Never show weakness and never reveal your insecurities to her.

And this is the most important tip. Take back frame sir. How? Never argue with her. Never answer her irrelevant questions during confrontation. Rather, be the one asking the questions. Never talk back at her, Just state your point and walk out of the room. And if she is whining in the process, stay quiet and stoic.

If you want her to do something, Insist on it until it's done.

That's it.

Good luck

Souqwaqif:
Dear All,

Greetings from here. Just needing a piece of positive counsel here. It has been subtle and recurrent but I decided to share this particular one.

My wife travelled for a burial with my kids without my knowledge. I travelled far away for work and call home everyday. Just recently I called very early in the morning to tell my wife I will be coming home by weekend,she somewhat sounded surprised and said instead of me coming on Friday I should come on Sunday.

I didn't say anything,I pretended not to be angry with that. Yet I immediately did a cash transfer for feeding and balance for the kids school fees that same morning we were discussing.

Later in the evening,I expected her to call and update me on the fees payment,but I didn't receive any call,I then had to call but her lines were all switched off,at this point I was worried especially when I couldn't talk to the kids.

I then called a neighbor to help me check if they are at home only to confirm they travelled for burial which the neighbor got to know from a phone conversation between my wife and her sister.

At this point, I called my wife's brother only to confirm that they were having a burial in their village, which I am not aware of,even as an inlaw.

Right now am very upset and I don't want to act in anger,please how can I react to this conspiracy between her and her family carrying my car with my kids to a distant village for burial without my knowledge.

Thanks for mature inputs only:

Souqwaqif:
Dear All,

Greetings from here. Just needing a piece of positive counsel here. It has been subtle and recurrent but I decided to share this particular one.

My wife travelled for a burial with my kids without my knowledge. I travelled far away for work and call home everyday. Just recently I called very early in the morning to tell my wife I will be coming home by weekend,she somewhat sounded surprised and said instead of me coming on Friday I should come on Sunday.

I didn't say anything,I pretended not to be angry with that. Yet I immediately did a cash transfer for feeding and balance for the kids school fees that same morning we were discussing.

Later in the evening,I expected her to call and update me on the fees payment,but I didn't receive any call,I then had to call but her lines were all switched off,at this point I was worried especially when I couldn't talk to the kids.

I then called a neighbor to help me check if they are at home only to confirm they travelled for burial which the neighbor got to know from a phone conversation between my wife and her sister.

At this point, I called my wife's brother only to confirm that they were having a burial in their village, which I am not aware of,even as an inlaw.

Right now am very upset and I don't want to act in anger,please how can I react to this conspiracy between her and her family carrying my car with my kids to a distant village for burial without my knowledge.

Thanks for mature inputs only:

jidamsel43:
You don't need to rush to make a hasty decision on this because many 'strange' things happen in a marriage that requires wisdom and patience. I began to realize some things recently when I got married which made me conclude that Marriage is full of strange and peculiar situations. Since my marriage late last year, my tolerance, patience, forbearance have increased. I have been to a point of raising my hand to hit her but I deployed caution and restraint. There is no issue or circumstance in a marriage that surpasses the use of patience and wisdom.

Back to the issue at hand, call your wife and inquire why she decided to embark on the journey without your permission. if she gives you a convincing response, please let it slide down like that. Anybody that tells you to come hard on your wife just wants to destabilize your happy home. If your wife's reason is reasonable to some extent, you have to accept her and just warn her not to take the unilateral decision again.

I have been confronted with issues more serious than this. My wife and I are still together better and stronger. There is no perfect man or woman.

We are just managing ourselves

Horlartunes:
She went to Bleep

tempex88:
Your wife must be from a nice family. Dem get burial and dem no give you billing

GreatResearcher:
Divorce her asap.
She is capable of cheating on you if she can do something without your consent.

DeLaRue:


Just like that

Oizee:
go and sit down and ask all d female relation u have that are married if every thing they do is with their husband's consent. Home scatterer

Souqwaqif:
Dear All,

Greetings from here. Just needing a piece of positive counsel here. It has been subtle and recurrent but I decided to share this particular one.

My wife travelled for a burial with my kids without my knowledge. I travelled far away for work and call home everyday. Just recently I called very early in the morning to tell my wife I will be coming home by weekend,she somewhat sounded surprised and said instead of me coming on Friday I should come on Sunday.

I didn't say anything,I pretended not to be angry with that. Yet I immediately did a cash transfer for feeding and balance for the kids school fees that same morning we were discussing.

Later in the evening,I expected her to call and update me on the fees payment,but I didn't receive any call,I then had to call but her lines were all switched off,at this point I was worried especially when I couldn't talk to the kids.

I then called a neighbor to help me check if they are at home only to confirm they travelled for burial which the neighbor got to know from a phone conversation between my wife and her sister.

At this point, I called my wife's brother only to confirm that they were having a burial in their village, which I am not aware of,even as an inlaw.

Right now am very upset and I don't want to act in anger,please how can I react to this conspiracy between her and her family carrying my car with my kids to a distant village for burial without my knowledge.

Thanks for mature inputs only: