DaInferno:
where do some people keep there conciousness, self esteem, self value and and empathy. Kai, the dude no try at all.

It's not the dudes fault.

StacyO:


It's not the dudes fault.

he isn't entirely out of the mess up still, how come you take a rich girl who presumably needs someone that can teach her one or two about life and mess her up that bad. I advice my girlfriend atimes, and am surprised at the fact that she doesn't have an idea at all about the topic if not that I just mentioned it.

if the dude can't advice her to go home when due, fk her sideways day after day, eat her money and food, I cringed when I read "the dude requested for sodomy" ,no wonder she can't walk well.. mehn, u can't tell me it ain't his fault. would he be happy if the same was mented on his own daughter?
and the parents on the other hand, be thinking they had a decent "teenage Daughter" they didn't check up on

DaInferno:
he isn't entirely out of the mess up still, how come you take a rich girl who presumably needs someone that can teach her one or two about life and mess her up that bad. I advice my girlfriend atimes, and am surprised at the fact that she doesn't have an idea at all about the topic if not that I just mentioned it.

if the dude can't advice her to go home when due, fk her sideways day after day, eat her money and food, I cringed when I read "the dude requested for sodomy" ,no wonder she can't walk well.. mehn, u can't tell me it ain't his fault. would he be happy if the same was mented on his own daughter?
and the parents on the other hand, be thinking they had a decent "teenage Daughter" they didn't check up on

They're both at fault if you ask me.




The girl to be precise even after all such ill treatments couldn't leave the guy.
I know sometimes, love can mess up someone's sense of reasoning.
But,in this case I don't think I'll blame anyone in particular.

Though the guy in question seems quite heartless to begin with though.

heendrix:


This is just 0.00001% compared to what Pvssy holders do to guys so News like this gives me so much joy and encourage more guys to wake up

I just hope u get this much joy wen it happens to ur sister or some gal u close with. Let's just learn to condemn evil abeg. Call a spade a spade.

StacyO:


They're both at fault if you ask me.




The girl to be precise even after all such ill treatments couldn't leave the guy.
I know sometimes, love can mess up someone's sense of reasoning.
But,in this case I don't think I'll blame anyone in particular.

Though the guy in question seems quite heartless to begin with though.

reason I vented all on him. reminds me of Adams story in the Bible. remember how God blamed him and all?!

dude is supposed to be more informed. A gentle man treats a lady right. a good guy would make a better woman out of this particular girl, but he's taken advantage of her negatively! just took this personal

DaInferno:
reason I vented all on him. reminds me of Adams story in the Bible. remember how God blamed him and all?!

dude is supposed to be more informed. A gentle man treats a lady right. a good guy would make a better woman out of this particular girl, but he's taken advantage of her negatively! just took this personal

Are you male or female??

Can't believe this is coming from a guy on nairaland.



Let's assuming the op was human enough,why wasn't he able to speak senses into the girl?

Regardless knowing what love(infatuation) did to her.



The did has already been done.
Why I believe that we should all be more tolerant of each other.

We all have our shortcomings but,using that against one another is exactly what op and his friend did.


Yes. Op is guilty as well

Well....

I think u envy dat guy, he was getting it and u were not

StacyO:

Are you male or female??

Can't believe this is coming from a guy on nairaland.



Let's assuming the op was human enough,why wasn't he able to speak senses into the girl?

Regardless knowing what love(infatuation) did to her.



The did has already been done.
Why I believe that we should all be more tolerant of each other.

We all have our shortcomings but,using that against one another is exactly what op and his friend did.


Yes. Op is guilty as well

I agree with your last words.
am a dude to the bone and will continue to be long afterwards... I'm already guessing u asked because of what's being portrayed here by most guys all day, but a good sum of us still know it's important to reason from a "perspective" , that been said: am not totally leaving op out of it cus one thing people hardly understand is; sometimes, you can't advice every neighbor, you just gotta mind your business for your own peace sake, especially during your NYSC so you don't get into trouble- am not saying he shouldn't have adviced them though, cus I would!. Besides he mentioned how futile it would be to talk to them, (her in particular)
but then again, am making emphasis directly on the story... so I say Kay fcked up. He's the one who had the powers to pull the plug

DaInferno:
I agree with your last words.
am a dude to the bone and will continue to be long afterwards... I'm already guessing u asked because of what's being portrayed here by most guys all day, but a good sum of us still know it's important to reason from a "perspective" , that been said: am not totally leaving op out of it cus one thing people hardly understand is; sometimes, you can't advice every neighbor, you just gotta mind your business for your own peace sake, especially during your NYSC so you don't get into trouble- am not saying he shouldn't have adviced them though, cus I would!. Besides he mentioned how futile it would be to talk to them, (her in particular)
but then again, am making emphasis directly on the story... so I say Kay fcked up. He's the one who had the powers to pull the plug

So to say,I wouldn't have said it any better.

Maybe, nairaland isn't that bad afterall.
Thank you for your time.











@Sammmyyyy marriage doesn't favour women more than it favours men. Please,do change that mentality.
And yes, virginity doesn't gaurantee you a good wife but,it sure does have some advantages.



I still don't really get the motive or point behind this topic anyway.

Tell us your own sex story @ OP.

All the blame is on the lady in love but not on Kay whose CONSCIENCE is totally dead. Kay will be out there tomorrow searching for a VIRGIN lol and yet won't still stick to the THIGHT HOLE if he ever finds one. And may end up committing suicide if his found THIGHT HOLE gets eaten by another dog behind his back, a way of karma.

Mikester:
Most girls are just shallow and stupid. That girl and most girls like her are just shameless.


As if men need more reasons to fear marriage.

May virgins like me not have them as wives.

This is exactly the reaction the OP wants. I hope he's happy. As if it's not a woman that will still marry the Kay guy. Men go around sleeping with anything female and turn around to complain there's no virgin to marry, how is that even logical? Will the virgins fall from heaven?

:That guy Kay is a Real Nigga and I love him just already God dey.

When a girl is drunk in love like beyonce, there is nothing you can do to save her. This is why some ladies would commit suicide over a guy. So many ladies have wasted their youth simply because they refuse to heed to warnings and advice. Tomorrow one god fearing man will inherit them as wives and soulmates.

Sammmyyyy:
I write this, sequel to a thread I read here a few days ago (precisely on Valentine's Day), on why people should preserve themselves and remain virgins till marriage.
After seeing the thread, my mind swayed right directly to the sayings of some men on this forum, on the opinion that marriage only favours the woman and not the man; then I tried connecting the dots.

That same day, my mind led me back to around a year ago while I was still serving. I rented a self-con, next to a young bar attendant of around 28 years, let's call him Kay. It was a twin flat, so we shared the same veranda and our rooms were very close.
This guy had a very young, charming, moderately rich, perfectly shaped, extremely slender, dark girl staying with him. Let's call her Joy. I'd later discover she was in 200L studying nursing but couldn't go home during the Corona, so, lied to her parents she was held in the school hostel instead.

In all honesty, I do not know her age, but my instinct told me she couldn't be more than 19. I even tried spying on her facebook account but couldn't get her exact age.

Guys, not to bore you, Kay and this girl, Joy, have sex more than they talk to each other. There is no day, no single day, I will not hear her whimpers in my room. It is not exaggeration if I say that no day passed without them having sex. They copulate so much that, at a time, the girl's walking posture changed. Her legs were not as free and slender as they used to.

Not just the sex. This girl spends anyhow for Kay. I got to later discover that she's the only child of her rich parents, so they never allow her lack anything.

In fact, I also learnt that the iPhone this guy, Kay, uses was bought by Joy as a birthday gift for him.
This guy would copulate roughly with the girl before leaving for work in the morning and roughly again when he comes back at night. Even midnights weren't left out as I occasionally would need to put up my speaker's volume just to distract me. And surprisingly again, this girl must cook for him before he comes back, from her own money.

Another shocking thing about this was, I have witnessed on more than 4 occasions, whenever we sit outside to gist, especially on weekends, this guy would say it openly that he cannot marry her, and that she should go and cook the rubbish she was making for him in her husband's house. That only her future husband deserves salty rice, hard beef, blah blah blah and not him. The girl too would just sit there, laughing sheepily.

I have also witnessed on one or two occasions, where this guy would throw this girl out at night on frivolous grounds. On one night after he had thrown her out and I had begged that he please allow her in, I heard their faint chatters on how that he wasn't enjoying her again, and that he needed something tighter, hence suggested sodomy. (I lie you not.)

At a time, I couldn't stand the excruciating agony Kay was putting this girl through that I wanted to sit her down and talk some sense into her, but it'd have been a waste. This girl is completely in love, or shall I say, foolishly in love, with him.

This act continued so long, until I finished my service there, packed my things and left the state.

My good people of nairaland, I can categorically say that this guy, Kay, milked this girl financially and sexually. Trust me, that girl has no sexual sweetness anymore. I just feel sorry for whoever her future husband will be. You know after you bite into a sugar cane and then spit it out after squeezing and enjoying its sweetness? That's what Kay has done to that girl.

....

Now, where's the connection?

Imagine if a girl like that who, at her tender age, has wasted her sexual prowess gets picked by a God fearing virgin man of God and is given an exorbitant bride price to pay?

Back in school, I have witnessed girls get laid with as low as Sharwarma and Vanilla ice cream.
Imagine a lady loses her virginity for ordinary meat pie and Bigi Chapman, and when the time for marriage comes, the prospective suitor is given over 200, 000 to pay as bride price.

Well, as for me. I have never messed anyone's child up.

And God is my witness, if she isn't a virgin, I will never drop a naira as pride price. Even a kobo like this, I will not pay.
The only reason I will marry a non virgin is if she'll pay my bride price, then I can reconsider.

In all honestly, I can say that marriage favours only the woman and not the man.

Being a virgin or not doesn't guarantee a successful marriage or relationship. It takes more than being a virgin to have a good relationship with another person. I think everyone deserves a second chance in life. Just ensure that the person doesn't have a STD though.

Oh! So bride price is different from dowry ? I don't get

KidDarkness:

In summary broda is saying that in Nigeria, bride/pride price should be paid for only virgins. Female non virgins should pay dowry to male virgins

StacyO:



So to say,I wouldn't have said it any better.

Maybe, nairaland isn't that bad afterall.
Thank you for your time.

@Sammmyyyy marriage doesn't favour women more than it favours men. Please,do change that mentality.
And yes, virginity doesn't gaurantee you a good wife but,it sure does have some advantages.



I still don't really get the motive or point behind this topic anyway.

Well, in Nigeria, i don't think marriage favours women more than it favours men but in a country like the USA or even Canada, i can definitely say that marriage favours women more than it favours men. It's so obvious. Men are manipulated or shamed into getting married with statements like,"be a man and get married" "if you aren't married by the age of 30, you aren't man enough" "real men propose" and other shit like that. After a few years, the lady might bring up an excuse which may lead to divorce. If the divorce goes through, mostly, men would have to pay alimony and will probably lose half or more than half of his property. Some men end up falling into depression after investing deeply into a marriage that brought them nothing but sex and companionship which they could have acquired without getting married. So, why invest in such a venture?

Judybash93:


Well, in Nigeria, i don't think marriage favours women more than it favours men but in a country like the USA or even Canada, i can definitely say that marriage favours women more than it favours men. It's so obvious. Men are manipulated or shamed into getting married with statements like,"be a man and get married" "if you aren't married by the age of 30, you aren't man enough" "real men propose" and other shit like that. After a few years, the lady might bring up an excuse which may lead to divorce. If the divorce goes through, mostly, men would have to pay alimony and will probably lose half or more than half of his property. Some men end up falling into depression after investing deeply into a marriage that brought them nothing but sex and companionship which they could have acquired without getting married. So, why invest in such a venture?

Why invest in such a venture in the abroad?

Even under serious freedom and enjoyment, most Nigerian men are still not satisfied and appreciative.



And yes, divorce rates are equally higher in countries like the USA.

StacyO:




Why invest in such a venture in the abroad?

Even under serious freedom and enjoyment, most Nigerian men are still not satisfied and appreciative.



And yes, divorce rates are equally higher in countries like the USA.

"Even under serious freedom and enjoyment, most Nigerian men are still not satisfied and appreciative."
Please, can you expand on this point?

It's really a serious case nurturing a female child these days.

Freedom makes female a prey to be devoured by lustful playboy.

HomerTimpson:
Oh! So bride price is different from dowry ? I don't get

Bride price is only paid to the bride. Dowry is paid by the bride to the groom or vice versa depending on the culture

Judybash93:


"Even under serious freedom and enjoyment, most Nigerian men are still not satisfied and appreciative."
Please, can you expand on this point?

Freedom in the sense that Nigerian men aren't enforced to pay alimony if and when divorced.

They get to enjoy all the juices flowing in the marriage.

Some equally go ahead with domestic violence (though this is something both gender participate in)

Most of this men treat their women like trash and cheat at the top of it.

There's absolutely nothing like gender equality but,I think Nigerian men don't understand what privileges mean.

StacyO:


Freedom in the sense that Nigerian men aren't enforced to pay alimony if and when divorced.

They get to enjoy all the juices flowing in the marriage.

Some equally go ahead with domestic violence (though this is something both gender participate in)

Most of this men treat their women like trash and cheat at the top of it.

There's absolutely nothing like gender equality but,I think Nigerian men don't understand what privileges mean.

Yeah, you're absolutely right but I'll like to know how you came to the conclusion that 'most' of these men treat their women like trash because i don't really have evidence for that but it'll be cool if something like that can be provided.

Judybash93:


Yeah, you're absolutely right but I'll like to know how you came to the conclusion that 'most' of these men treat their women like trash because i don't really have evidence for that but it'll be cool if something like that can be provided.

Typing from experience.



Though not married,I've seen things.





Why assuming things always won't help anyone,rather conducting a realistic research will be best.


Portraying Nigerian woman as evil on social media is one of the most funniest things I came across on the net.

A coin most definitely will always have two sides.

StacyO:


Typing from experience.



Though not married,I've seen things.





Why assuming things always won't help anyone,rather conducting a realistic research will be best.


Portraying Nigerian woman as evil on social media is one of the most funniest things I came across on the net.

A coin most definitely will always have two sides.

Okay. So, your assumption is based on personal experience. It's not enough but it can't be ignored as well.
Well, the difference between those who are exposed and not exposed is mostly revealed in their utterances. People will come online and just make claims without any evidence to back them up. I cringe whether i see such and that can also be linked to how we demonize others for merely existing. "Nigerian men are cheats" "Nigerian when are useless" .... Like WTF

Judybash93:


Well, in Nigeria, i don't think marriage favours women more than it favours men but in a country like the USA or even Canada, i can definitely say that marriage favours women more than it favours men. It's so obvious. Men are manipulated or shamed into getting married with statements like,"be a man and get married" "if you aren't married by the age of 30, you aren't man enough" "real men propose" and other shit like that. After a few years, the lady might bring up an excuse which may lead to divorce. If the divorce goes through, mostly, men would have to pay alimony and will probably lose half or more than half of his property. Some men end up falling into depression after investing deeply into a marriage that brought them nothing but sex and companionship which they could have acquired without getting married. So, why invest in such a venture?

Are you not resident in Nigeria or how come you made that opening line?

You are totally wrong. Even stacyO may think otherwise but it's the truth. Marriage favours women than men.

luminouz:


Are you not resident in Nigeria or how come you made that opening line?

You are totally wrong. Even stacyO may think otherwise but it's the truth. Marriage favours women than men.

How? Maybe, some women may put their financial responsibilities on their men and by so doing might gain more favours from marriage. I don't know much. I'm open to learning more about this

DaInferno:
where do some people keep there conciousness, self esteem, self value and and empathy. Kai, the dude no try at all.

na the lady lack self esteem not the guy.Imagine a guy saying in public that what she cooks for him is rubbish and that he can never wife her and she is smiling sheepishly like op said .a lady with self respect will just ditch the guy after making such a statement.the guy on the other hand is just heartless.after im mess up with this girl and dump her and the girl he now settles with ends up worse than a jezebel maybe he might start wondering why he treated this girl like that.

Have a whole lot to say but don't time to type in details.
1, If you see evil, try your best to say it out even if it's to inform someone who you think will do something. Am saying this cause of KARMA. Op, for the fact you knew and didn't say anything or try to aid in one way or the other you have earned KARMIC DEBT Sir.
2, The Kay guy, that one em own don be. His own Karmic debt no be small

We really have to be very careful how we treat one another weather male or female. This life is very deep.
I come in Peace. Blessings evergreen

Aditkd:
Have a whole lot to say but don't time to type in details.
1, If you see evil, try your best to say it out even if it's to inform someone who you think will do something. Am saying this cause of KARMA. Op, for the fact you knew and didn't say anything or try to aid in one way or the other you have earned KARMIC DEBT Sir.
2, The Kay guy, that one em own don be. His own Karmic debt no be small

We really have to be very careful how we treat one another weather male or female. This life is very deep.
I come in Peace. Blessings evergreen

Very funny so OP should sit her down and talk sense to her?

Thats when you will hear your friend ehn he is jealous of you ooo how can he say he is advising me ?

i tried it in school up-till today me and my best friend don't talk to each other again.


Another one in school mehn she cooks well morning, afternoon and night as in better food oooo

wetin consine me [b]our wife wetin you get for us hunger dey wire us ooo[/b] after eating i pack my handout run enter school

infact she washes his clothes self and this guy dey bang nonsense anytime


This girl would come to us crying anytime she hear something about him following another girl in campus

heendrix:


This is just 0.00001% compared to what Pvssy holders do to guys so News like this gives me so much joy and encourage more guys to wake up

Hmn...