This is long, but, it's a testimony RE: What's That All About?

I was raised as a conservative Christian where "speaking in tongues" was deemed emotional blah-blah, or some demonic episode, etc,,  I have been more open minded as an adult, studying the Bible, alone, and much more frequently.  Didn't go to church for several years.  Went to a few eventually, avoiding some~such as "charismatic", for the most part, even though still open minded.  Just didn't want to walk in to a church w/ppl jumping over pews, rolling on the floor, babbling all over the place, (get my drift:?).  Went to a particular church (only bcause daughters "guy-friend" went there)~one of those kind of churches I was avoiding.  Was pleasantly surprised to find they believed in the indwelling Power of the Spirit, but NO nonsense was demonstrated, so I continued to go. I knew, from occasional comments, that they believed in "speaking of tongues".  After attending for over 2yrs., the preacher gave a lesson on it.  The following Sunday, after service, he asked those of us who wanted to, could receive the "filling" of the Holy Spirit.  I'd studied a bit on it during that week, and pretty much had my self talked out of it.  Not that I didn't believe it possible, just, well, don't know??~~My curious agnostic daughter "reminded" me that I had considered this opportunity during the week.  How could I not follow through for her sake?  I joined several others, kindof reluctantly. I had spent 2yrs, on my own, studying the Bible from start to finish, well almost, I still had a few books left in NT.  I asked a LOT of questions, along w/others, b4 "these ppl" proceeded.  I have to admit, I was curious, but just unsure about this thing I'd always been taught against.  And ofcourse, I was somewhat anxious of the unkown.

Maybe 40 of us went into a room w/3-4 ppl that prayed over each one of us individually, as they layed their hands on our heads.  Ppl did begin to "babble".  I was obviously still anxious, but was thinking, "they've PLANTED ppl in here to get the rest of us PREPPED for the experience".  This older, sweet lady (i always thought she was a sweet, quiet, sophisticated lady~just by observation), put her hands very gently around my head and was speaking over me, "in tongues".  Nothing happened, atleast until after she went on to the next person. 

I was 46yrs old, in control of my life, my body, my finances, my kids, even my husband (i thought), when WOW, my tongue started tap-dancing in my mouth.  All I could do was put my hand over my mouth as I "experienced" the supernatural.  What the heck, REALLY!??!  I would "speak" a little, cover my mouth, and then say OMG OMG OMG!!  A allowed, yes, allowed this to happen for about 3-4 minutes, repeatedly "speaking", placing my hand over mouth and then saying OH MY GOD, over and over.  I kind-of freaked~Not the emotional thing that I'd been taught AT ALL.  This was truly a little miracle, a little gift.  I was in tears, shaky, scared (in a sense) and really wanted to get the heck out of that room~to see my family (who by the way were right out-side the door, my daughter with her EAR pressed to the wall). 

I looked at my husband and said, "it's the real deal"!  My police-officer son, in uniform straight from work, looked at me and rolled his eyes.  My husband didn't say or ask me anything about it for almost a year. ( I finally spoke to him.)  My daughter and middle-son (atheist), both asked questions over the next few days.

I knew I had stopped the Spirit from being "free" within me, but, I thought~"I'll wait till I'm alone and spend time w/the Lord in prayer".  I literally fasted 3 days, reading my Bible, not doing an ounce of momma-duty, and just isolated w/the Lord.~1st time by the way. NOTHING happened!  I cried out, but couldn't understand why God wasn't "following through" on His end.  Yeh, that's how ignorant I was.  On the last day, with just a couple of hours left, I got off my knees and finished the fast off w/more Bible reading.  I have to say, I was not happy, I was frustrated and a little bit angry w/God.  When I opened the Bible, He put my focus directly on the Words He had for me and my attitude.  I wish I would have written that script down, but it was basically, "who are you to question me?"  I instantly knew He was speaking straight to me.

SEVERAL months pass.  What did I get from that little bitty experience?  I know that I know it was supernatural, and was absolutely from God. I also know that it was a confirmation of my salvation.  I have since read into the final book, Revelations, by several chapters.  Hungry, studying, sometimes going through dry spells, knowing He is so much more than I'm able to grasp and understand.  However,  I was gaining wisdom and began having little revelations.

Then a sequence of events:~supernatural is my explanation.  I dreamt of the word Shalom.  I'm a dreamer (light sleeper I guess), but don't ever remember dreaming about a word.  I'll cut to the core of events to make this shorter (ha-ha, right?).  I go to a Sadr in Dallas Texas w/long lost friends.  A Jewish women is sitting at our particular table, and she's also monitoring other tables out in the hall. (stuff to buy during intercessions).  I'm checking out the "stuff".  I see the word Shalom on a carved stone.  "What does this word mean", I asked this Jewish lady.  She said, "Peace" and then went on quoting something it pertained to in the OT.  I really didn't pay much attention, cause "peace" just didn't strike me as a big deal.  I figured a stone w/the name of Jesus or God is Love would have been a little more interesting.  It was, however, the only Word on anything they had for sale and I had dreamt it.

I had a debate w/these long lost, conservative, minister friends, on the way back home, along w/my best-friend, REGARDING my little-bitty tongue experience.  Well, I just quit talking, cuz, I could see they all thought I was loony, or something? (been there, done that).

Bottom line, I had NO friends, family (except my unbelieving children), and really no-one at church I knew that well, to talk to about this new thing, and WHAT'S IT ALL ABOUT.

A few days after the Sadr, and SEVERAL months after my ONE and ONLY experience~ I went on-line to read-up on "tongues".  The 2nd article I read had the word Shalom and a full description of the meaning.  Boy, it's much more than "peace".  If I would have payed more attention to this Jewish women, I would have understood, maybe, the scripture she gave me regarding the command Moses was given from God to pray the Blessing of Peace over the Israelites.  Shalom means to "make whole, to complete", etc, etc, At this time, I was in the final book of the Bible~Revelations~and God was completing me, making me whole.  I sat back in my computer chair and the Holy Spirit came over me.  PLZ don't mock~I understand He was already IN me, but He just FILLED me up>  As a 45yo, Christian conservative, I started searching the Lord out for myself.  At 46 He gives me a little gift.  At 47 he's completing me.

I'm not going to go into the details of the "tongue" experience that I had at that moment, but, I will say that I am now unhindered and free.  My faith is stronger, my understanding is wiser, my confidence is greater.  I'm able to bless others easier, pray w/o ceasing, speak bolder about my Love for the Lord.  My relationship w/Him took a leap.

My kids are a bit more perplexed.  My husband is becoming more curious.

You have all the scriptures that other's have suggested in earlier entries.  I totally get all parts of all the arguments, cuz I've now been full circle.  I suggest to start w/Genesis and seek God w/ all your heart, soul and mind.  When He leads, then you don't have to ask or question ppl anymore. 

Revelations is said to come w/a blessing.  That's exactly what I've been given.  God is completing me by honoring me as I honor Him. I have yet to read the last chapter of this book.  There's so much power in the Word, that it sometimes can be overwhelming.  I'm ready to re-read the Bible w/ an even higher level of understanding.  I just bought an amplified version.

I keep this gift pretty much to myself, unless I see that someone is open to it.  So, be blessed if YOU are.  God Speed.

~~rebecca (the mother of a conservative son, atheist son, agnostic daughter, and curious husband)~~but NOT for long

God is so Good!