I am the man you once looked into his eyes and saw a future.
A father to an unborn son of true love,
A man breaking his promises of old age to his wife,
A man whom you will probably see several bullet holes in his chest,
and maybe two head shots, by the time someone is reading this.
But I plead, do not morn me.
For I ordered sounds of guns as Breakfast and lunch and
running and hiding as supper.
if you pick this note from my bloody Breast Pocket,only a smile should run through your face.
For I also served people breakfast and lunch to ensure the hungry Customers didn't kill me.
But it seems the hungry Customers will get away with the Bloodshed on their hand and me, die like another numeric figure.
I only make one demand of you,
Fresh Flowers on my grave Two times a year, and my Casket Pure Black together with a spear.
I know I am in no position to ask for Promises,because I broke mine to everyone who believed in me.
Remember me not as this bloody memory you see, but as a man who served breakfast and lunch to put Food on his table.
But the Hungry Customers took it all, and also my Life.

She tasted the whole Faculty through her vagina.
changing joysticks like cheap clothes,
making me feel, my hormones are less then required.
My masculinity reduces everytime I think of her,
everyday she walks by me I feel shame.
But to console myself, she diminishes.
In our first year, she was fresh as daises but now in our Fourth year she is all dried up like an Oak.
Like a dying flower, she looks up the sun for Germination,
trying to make ends meet she displays her newly acquired skills on the road,
and for half a loaf of bread, I always afford her.
I use to be on her decline, but now, I am on the Contributors list.
in my bed during the rainy nights, my conscience is monstered,
holding the back of her pony tail firmly i stroke hard and fast in spite.
for she monstered my conscience and I don't care if her cries can be heard far and wide.
for my new found religion say “revenge is for the Lord"
but for Twenty minutes straight, I am the Lord whom Vengence belongs to.
But when it's all done and she is Gone, I don't feel that Fufillment,
I am back on the highway of depression town
because what ever she did to me few years ago, The Vengence can't cure it,
it only made it worse.


Until I met you.

I'm at war with my flesh anytime you come closer.
I am constantly losing the war when your forefinger navigate around my veins popping out of my hand while in bed,watching this moving picture, pretending not to be aware of what you are doing to me.
It feels like the only Poison I would take without an antidote.
I am looking into your eyes and i can see peace.
And your head; covered with this blue scarf, pressing down my shoulders for comfort.
I miss those days,
when I had series of quick erections caused by your forefinger at the right place,the only words in my head is “Sweet Relief".
It will only be Confirmation when those lips of yours press on mine and we pretend your roommate is not present with us.
All I want for the rest of my life is my head on your thighs; by the way, softer than any pillow,
while I look up, into your eyes lost.
It will only be Confirmation when we finally make love, and your moans can be heard by my hormones.
Sadly, all these feels like it's all made up in my head. But, when I get that Confirmation, I assure you I'll surrender my body to you for absolute ownership.

Sebastian calls you every night to give you excuses of traffic.
The first rule in Lagos is to be careful when you drive along Ikeja axis;
Sebastian always takes that route to buy you suya mixed with Garlic,
But You know he is a Marriage Offender isn't that tragic?

Yes, he had Good looks when he approached you in your final year,
a lot of vices he had, but you ignored because he had a balanced hair,
trying to ring up his phone, “Hello, Sebastian, are you there?"
And it responds, “The number you are trying to reach is with his mistress; please hold or try again if you care.”


At 11:45 pm, Sebastian enters with his tired gears,
Sebastian says exhaustively, “Honey, the traffic was crazy; I cannot wish for you to be there."
You yell, “You are cheating on me right, Is that even fair?”
“Lora what are you saying,i had only a few couple of beers".

The next morning, you wake up to a spritz of perfume new to your scents,
Something seductive yet ‘homme'
Then you heard a faint whisper of “we still meet today.”
You think to yourself, ”it is not work-related or why is he sounding erotic today".
Neither is it his only friend; Edwin, he has not been in town Since last Tuesday”
You become very suspicious and jealous,
that you walk silently towards the bathroom door to eavesdrop on his conversation later that evening,
You silently run back to the bed, pretending to be asleep but your heart is shivering,
as soon as you heard approaching steps towards the door you shut your eyes tight the tears are creeping,
The door opens; Sebastian picks up his tote bag and leaves the vicinity.

You think to yourself again that
”He left for work without any kisses,
He left for work like a bachelor who is in a hurry to visit,
He left for work like I don't exist.
He left for work like I don't amount to him or his feelings".
The tears then turn to a smirk,
You hold your head up high,
You silently walk out of the room,
And you spot him petting Max the Dog, Like a wife.

You silently walk into the kitchen,
Pick up a knife, walk silently behind him like a loving wife
And with three steps away from him
You give him a stab at the back
And you smile, “Cheating bastard Rot in Hell with its might".
His phone beeps with a message
You take it out of his pocket,
“I hope your wife will not find out? meet us at Louis Hotel, Room 85, 10:00pm”
You are convinced that your act is reasonable and right.
So confident, even your mother will be in support with a smile.

At 9'o Clock, you take a drive,
Zoom off in your SUV to the destination in your mind,
Heading straight to the hotel room you open the door about to take out your knife,
“Surprise," shouts your family with a smile and a laugh
You then realize the mistress was just an illusion in your mind.


Sebastian has been planning a surprise Birthday with your sisters and your Aunt.
Explanations of the recent late-night arrivals and the whispers becomes clear in your mind,
The new perfume was to smell good today.
I guess he was bad at keeping that a secret.
The jealousy got to you so good,
that you put Sebastian to bed in the Fridge, freezing away with his headless body and a knife at his back.

“Dear Nana, it's me.
The Man you once looked into his eyes
and saw the whole world.
The father of your unborn fruit of our togetherness.
The man who is breaking the promise of growing old beside you.

Hey Nana, I am back,
but not in flesh, but spirit,
because,by the moment you are reading this,
You should be seeing twelve Gun holes and maybe two more on my fore head.

But Nana, stop crying,
The sounds of guns were my Breakfast and lunch, running and hiding in this forest was my dinner.
if you pick this letter from my bloody Breast pocket, let a Smile come after those tears.

Nana,my love,
For I also killed people to ensure I am.back with you,it seems those who kill shall be killed.
I know your emotional War is Suicidal, I know I won't make it back.

Nana, promise me,
I want fresh flowers on my grave Two times a year
and our Boy or Girl visiting me at my Tomb post.
I know I am in no position to ask for a promise,because I broke the last one.

One last thing Nana,
I want you to Smile everyday,
for remember me not as this bloody memory
but as the man who Fought to keep you and them safe.

Yours truly, Shamimi.
Loves and kisses Nana".