FranklinRich:


Chibuking81 dey on sabbatical. When the grand papa of bears come out, he will show face again!!!

which other grand papa, can't u see the ancestral lineages of the bear crawling past the street. They have castrated the bulls and made the bears even bullish.

I keep on saying, ppl should watch from the sideline with their money handy for commencement of another bull. Don't invest on hope unless it's on long term.

faith is evidence of things hoped for and it works out great patience.

ihedioramma:
hello dear, we dont reply any thing that is not about (nse) here. thank's one love.

I am not "dear" I am a brother in the lord

jokhen10:
Nairalanders! Here's What Mtn Did For Me; which prompted me to write this letter to saySay A Big Thank You !

I so remember vividly, the times i have had to
curse and
swear at you
Mtn for the #50 you deducted from my recharged
balances,
for unknown
activated services. Will i ever forget the
frustrations i have
felt
when i
could not get connected to friends and families at
crucial
times, not as a
result of limited funds in my balance but
sometimes as a
result of
unfavourable services.
What about the annoying moments when i have
had to
wait for almost an
hour to speak to your customer agents and end
up not speaking
to
any one. And
so many, many other faults anyone can think of
finding in Mtn's services. Why
am i saying all these? well bring me a million and
one faults whatsoever
you can find in them, and i would give you just a
single
reason
why i would
n-e-v-e-r swap you my Mtn with any other
network provider in
the
world. Notice
that i stressed the word 'never', and by that i
mean Never!
I have had to sit for an unfixed,coincidental thirty
minutes
lecture
about the greater services provided by a certain
network
provider over
Mtn's, by my mentor, and all i was thinking in my
heart while
i
listened
was, 'i wish you could just open my heart and
see, that for
better or
worse, i am married to Mtn. My sweet mother
had once
laughed over my
foolishness in rejecting a free Sim offered to me
thrice by
this
same
network provider my mentor talks about so
passionately.
First
was at
Alakuko, Lagos during their anniversary last year
and the
second and third
times were at Sango bridge and a place called
Aliishiba here
in
Sango too.
Do i have any regrets? No!
Yes, i might not have enjoyed any personal
benefits as a life
long fan
of this great institution, and i might never enjoy
any, but i do
know now,
that you Mtn has done me a service that no man
and no network
provider has ever
done me. For you have taught me the secret and
have given
me the
blueprints of being a generational blessing, a life
long
dream,
and that
blue print is the powerful word called 'Service'.
For you have touched the lives of mean and
hopeless
Nigerians and you
by this have touched the lives of so many
beautiful babies
not
yet born
somewhere ages and ages hence, with selfless
services. I
can
never imagine
even to the third and maybe more generations of
the
Iyanya's,
the
Chidinma's. the praiz's, the Monica's and
countless others
like
them
suffer, thanks to Mtn, this people were given hope
by this
gift
GOD sent
our way, to Nigerians.
What about the unknown thousands, millions of
Nigerians
who have had
their lives bettered by a certain program
sponsored by you Mtn, called "Who
wants to be a
millionaire?" or the unknown multitude who have
had their
business ideas
backed by you Mtn, an institution, that even the
GOD of Heaven and Earth is
pleased with. We even communicate on our Mtn
Sims. Yes,
so
true, smiles. I
remember a certain social show in my university
days, which
all
the
students looked forward to anxiously, but
threatened never
to
hold due to
limited funds. Who came to the rescue?
Superman?
wolverine?, of course not,
well your guess is as good as mine, none but you
Mtn.
I can sense people's thoughts already, "he is
probably doing this
to seek
attention and favour, or perhaps he was paid to
write this.
Well, why
should i try to change their thoughts,i can't, so i
wont try, it is
a
free
world, they can think whatever they may, after all
we are all
entitled to our
own opinions. I write this to seek no favour,
neither do i
write
to endorse you
Mtn, for a renowned institution as you need no
endorsement
from me an
unknown common boy out there. For even the
endorsements
from
the powers that be
in our Nation, and the dozens of awards you have
bagged
locally and
internationally cannot justify enough, for me
though, the
impact you have
made in the life of we Nigerians. Sometimes i
wish your
managers were in
Government so our lives could glow as the rays of
the 'y'hello' sun.
And so on behalf of every Nigerian that you have
wiped their
tears,
upon the gloomy faces that you have put smiles
on, for the entertaining and
educative programs that you have sponsored to
give
comfort
and bliss in our
homes, for those life changing projects that
you have embarked on, for
Nigerian's sake, for the beautiful gains of service
that you
have
taught
me, a lesson that, if i could swear, i would swear
to teach my
unborn
children, but my religion frowns at swearing, so
do i, and for
many other
good that you have done, that you are doing and
that you
might and would do
that i know of or know not, that i might never
know of, i say a Big Thank You! You are
My Mtn and i am your subscriber for life.

has mtn done anytin dat deserves your tank u? if yes, do so now or hit like.

And they coloured the lives of so many jobless Nigerians out there through their Sme datashare.
Though they have made us lose money due to their network issues (data tsunami) and made us get stuck with data we can't share to customers.

In the midst of frustrations from their 180 customer care that renders false information (if they ever pick ur calls) to customers who mistakenly calls them instead of their sme platform customers care.
I will only but say,

God bless MTN

sketcherJ:
Five Funny ways on how to get attended to fast/jump queue legally in a bank

In Nigeria today,most of the banks we have are very slow in their service,customers would have to wait on the queue for many minutes before they could be attended to.


Now I have devised five funny ways in which you can get answered to on time,believe me,noone would fight or argue with you when the bank cashiers are attending to you ,even if you are the last person on the queue..let's get to it already..

1.Get a Baby!!(lol,not for men though)yea,I am not telling you girls to go and get pregnant oo...just carry the baby of ur neighbour(tell d mother you are going to d bank !!don't let them lynch you ooo!!)when you get inside the bank,fill ur teller,go on the queue and pinch d good baby,when the cry of the baby rings the air..everybody on the teller would be pleading with the cashier to attend to you,(don't forget to buy biscuits for the cool baby oo)

2.Fall down and Faint!!(yes..men this is where you come in..its simple,stay on the queue and just fall down and close your eyes!!and make it some 2 minutes before you open your eyesviola!!you are a celebrity!!anytime you enter the bank,you will be answered to immediately (just pray your neighbour, abi your gf/bf no dey in the bank that day you fall oo)

3.ACT CRAZY LIKE TERRY G..if you don't know how to craze..abeg don't use weed oo..just take dry pepper with you and put it in ur bums..am telling you the craze that will be emanating from you will make headlines...(Lol)

4.Blow Grammars out of proportion: You don't need a dictionary, just go to Patrick Obahiagbon's social media handles,You will find your tools there..When you enter the bank, cooly fill your tellers, nope don't stay on the queue, just walk straight to the cashier....and BLOW YOUR GRAMMARS.


http://fresh-folks-ville..com/2015/08/five-funny-ways-on-how-to-get-attended.html?m=1

All these brouhaha just to pay in my money again. Il simply make a friend and even dump the fill out form for him/her to pay in. Well this is one of the best ways, but since ur talking of funny ways, comedians can do that.

Pls Wats the EPS of Abc transport and how much did they pay as dividend this yr.

donofdons:
[size=18pt]for those of you that think i dont know what i am saying,you can see how much evansmedical have appriciated in just 10days.
I am well informed my niggers...buy into this company and watch how you will have at least 450% returns before february[/size]

Because of that word 'niggers' we ain't buying no more. Enjoy the loot alone, your word iz bin heard, ur lamentation iz bin taking to heart. Time will prove u right or wrong. Our nigga or rather Our G mama

starlingslimnet:
Pride goeth before destruction.

I don't see pride in that statement, rather an illustration telling u your riches and blessings on earth and heaven is in soul winning.

Agbalowomeri:


Bros na TGIF? This is not SWG oooooooo

SMC has a share in SWG. That's why both of us are watching PZ with the eyes of a hawk

maspero22:
heheh..nice1 OP. i did virtually all. chai...growing up was fun. i miss ma childhood friends, many of whom, r gone. i remember sucking water taps that weren't running to see if water will drop into ma mouth after school. Also playing war zones wit friends in incomplete buildings, drinking much water to see if i'll be pregnant, watching robocup cartoon, Zero Zero, Willie Willie and superman. i will always watch ma elder brothers construct antenna wit aluminium and long bamboo pole and trust me, d local stations dey clear pass DSTV with d big rainbow that normally show first on NTA; d days of colored #1 ice cream, eleganza biro and chi chi sweet. so many things then. i miss those years allah. chai!

U sound like u grew up in Old Enugu. wili wili don die, clap, who kill am. was that game called Ikpo oga or itu swell

PrinxArthur1:
me and friends that time we will catch a live lizard open its stomach and stitch it back while after 3 days it dies or survive

And are u a surgeon today, if not, ur environment didn't do u good.

I can't forget flying carpet with milo tin plastic cover. And playing soccer with counters. Now where.is my Goalie.




including stoning cashew seeds



wat of throwing cards or at a wall to know the cards that will lap like tv to the wall.

manie:



I stopped reading the so-called prophet's post more than 6 months ago.

It goes to show that if humans are not perfect, wat more a mere octagonal-pus.
Octopus indeed

donbenie:
As a Civil Servant in Anambra State I can assure my salary comes as and when due,this is the second time it's being increased this year,which will make it a 36%increase in the health sector..

Pls throw more light. Never knew abt this 2nd increment. Will it equally reflect on the conhess and conmess.

ihedioramma:
I did not go there, i just look his profile as i see that post .

Sometimes, I just think u are a dual personality. next minute, y sound like a dude, the other u minute u sound like a.... nerd

Whoever thinks u don't know wat ur doing is on a wrong course

Analyst and traders with inside information on actual intrinsic values of cos.

Pls Wats the fair value of
flour mill
NASCON
Pz

chukyjones:


And when will THAT DAY be?

possibly, he has a surprise package for us on his 100th day in office.

.I don't see anything wrong in keeping ur cash ready till wen the surprise bull comes.
U can only miss out 10% daily price appreciation.

cash.is king when your investment strategies and principles have been faulted

donofdons:
i have come again oo with my predictions...i am not an insider trader but i am well informed...i talked about unity banks,those with eyes saw it and share moved fron 50k to 5 naira and is at 2.50 since...i talked about neimeth and they are up by 145%
now my prediction....will dissapear in 48 hrs

[size=3pt]Buy evansmedical now[/size]

This is exactly the type of comment that draws me out of hiding.
very confusing statement. so we buy now based on predictions. Pls wat yr are u in presently cos I sense someone travels tru time in this forum. Before u disappear into the future in next 48hrs. Pls tell us your prediction on Japaul oil, Wil it get to M5

booqee:
list of total crap!

When and how did they even form all these jargon?? Imagine GFF-gbona feli feli...e.g she GFF.
Seriously? that's the dumbest and lamest thing i've heard in 2015!

Mehn i give up!

The elders are complaining we are losing our indigenous language to English, now we are are about losing the English to zombie language.

Pls bring back the qwerty keypad phones b4 this android generation degenerate us to zombies faster than we could ever imagine

Anoruo:
Who will marry them ?

the unbelievers I guess, since ur allowed to be equally yoked with ur kind only

AlchemistDean:
Jim Iyke be formin' nigga yaw yaw...He's gettin' old..He needs to start applyin' Maturity to what he does

God bless you

I luved that guy from inception in one karate movie called armed forces, bit I'm perturbed that he still wants to be a boi at his age. He just should get his act right and act mature

zendi:
The cartoon bear looks smart and sinister while the bull looks strong but stupid. No wonder the bear always seems to be winning, out-smarting, clever , cunning and entrapping.Not our portion!

Omo if that's the bear that entered NSE then na Oct tins ooo.

Cos that bear looks devious and mischievous.

Airforce one down!
I repeat
Airforce one down!!

I don't know why I always buy this stock at wrong prices. And why people are so emotional attached to it.

stchw!

still the biggest joke of the year

Titto93:
This is what happens when you think that other advertisers have used all the names in the world, not knowing your brain is limited.

imagine! Wednesday is 10pm till done.

Abeg, are they now doing all night cooking of ppl in the church till they are done.

Odeshi tins!

And that Nokia 6230i was far costlier than most of the Mtk android phones in the market.

I guess the modern NFC in medium and high end phones has replaced the archaic infrared

UkwuAmu:


What planet is this dude from? He always cracks me me up with the way he writes . Can you please explain what you mean by the bolded. chai

That dude sorry bitl must have hypnotised some of us. Do u know I actually understand him but after ur comment, I read it again without deciphering a damn thing from that comment of his.

myjoy08:
President Buhari Dissolves NNPC Board Of Directors...


http://africanspotlight.com/2015/06/26/buhari-dissolves-nnpcs-board-of-directors/

Some
http://www.thisdaylive.com/articles/fg-revokes-licences-of-abi -transport-courier-nine-others/213160/

Let's see how the market reacts to this on Monday

demmy0325:
.... I swear... As in... Its nt funny at all... Showin Us crazy Old school comedy.. Why did he even release it... And funny enuf.. Its the highest grossing nollywood movie... That shii of crap.... Its even a shame to that AY himself for releasin that movie,.. Its nt an achievement at all.. Buh anytin goes since it rakes in money.. Rubbish!...

Thanks to Ramsey Naoh that added some classical acting skills to the movie.

It goes to show Ay is a performer and not a comedian

mercylicious:


B4 nko? Make he chop d one wey mgt chop remain.
I remember my grand dad used to travel from Enugu to Lagos to attend agms.
I am just wondering why he took such risks? Maybe it affords him opportunity to blast his big big grammar.

Chai Nwa 042. No wonder you're a sharp shooter and so dogged in investment. Ur dad must have given you the genes and great mentoring

bigass:
By next week many will cry their eyes out. If you are in now quickly jump out. The bear that will come next week will be bad. NSE is a going down. Most stock will lose 50 percent by next weekend. The bear is here. I sold all my shares today even at terrible losses. Put your money in piggy bank.

Middle of July will tell. It's all man for himself with his strategy when the bears are around. The best time to bailout is the next bull run till Oct when the market starts recovering from September bears.

Disclaimer : historic pattern can change any year.

Born2berich:




When the bulls come again, everybody will become a stock market analyst/guru.

But for now, this is Chibuking81 turf. so let's stay clear.