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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Career / Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom (14675 Views)
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Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by ijekul(m): 8:52am On Oct 05, 2017 |
1. THE GOWN PULLERS
They seem to have this parasitic attachment
to our gowns. These are lawyers who are
always very quick to pull your gown when you
are on your feet conducting your matter;
probably when you seem to be encountering a
hitch in prosecuting your case. They are
pulling your gown to draw your attention, or
to whisper a supposedly solution to help you
out of a situation. They seem to always have
an answer to pull you through, especially
when you are on your feet and in a problem.
As a young lawyer, these folks were very
handy when they were around, but as time
went on, they became irritating. It now
seems like they are just waiting or even
praying for you to get into some sort of
trouble for them to begin to pull your gown.
Truth is, there are times this gown pulling
thing ends up confusing you the more and
breaking your concentration. Imagine sitting
between two gown pullers, one pulling you
from the right, the other from the left?
Surprisingly, I have also observed that
sometimes when it finally gets to the turn of
our gown pullers to conduct their cases, they
seem to get more stuck than us.Anyway,
they are a nice set of people with good
intentions, but they need to be moderate
and wise on how they go about their gown
pulling business. 22 Likes 2 Shares
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Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by ijekul(m): 8:55am On Oct 05, 2017 |
2. AS THE COURT PLEASERS
You will enjoy these guys only if they are
chorusing ‘as the court pleases’ when the
court is attacking the opposing counsel, and
not you. You will most likely want to be their
choir master/mistress when the court is on
your side, and your opponent is on the
receiving end of the game. These folks seem
to be looking forward to shouting ‘as the
court pleases’. They seem to be anointed for
this, because they usually have loud voices
and are always on time to echo ‘as the court
pleases’.
The annoying part of it is that, even when
you strongly believe you are on the right
side, and for whatever reason the court
seems to be taking another position, or even
when the court is glaringly wrong, they would
still be echoing their ‘as the court pleases’
like that’s what they came to court to do.
Surprisingly though, when it’s their time to
do their cases, they seem not to be as loud
as they were when they were screaming ‘as
the court pleases’ all over the place. 20 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by ijekul(m): 9:09am On Oct 05, 2017 |
3. JUDGE FIGHTERS Whether it’s a curse or something following them from their village, or because of their ill manners; these set of lawyers always seem not to be in the good book of most judges. I personally know some lawyers who are like that. They are always in a fight with one judge or the other. Truth is that they always get to lose in the fight, but surprisingly they keep on fighting. Anyway, I enjoy doing matters with them because judges would always want to get at them, and I get away with things ordinarily I wouldn’t get away with. I love it when they are fighting with a judge and am on the other side, because most of my applications are likely to be granted, and my objections sustained by the judge, all in a bid to get at them So guys, look forward to doing cases with them, it carries some advantages. 27 Likes 4 Shares
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Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by ijekul(m): 9:10am On Oct 05, 2017 |
4. ELDER STATESMEN (THE ANCESTORS) This category of lawyers comprises mostly of senior lawyers. No doubt, seniority at the bar is not to be taken for granted, and senior members of the bar ought to be duly respected. These are lawyers that will not hesitate to put it to your face that they are your seniors. Yes you are my senior, but do you have to throw it all over my face? You often hear them making comments like – “All through my years of practice, I have never seen this kind of a thing. What kind of practice is this?” ,One once told me in a low tone, 'Counsel, is that how you do your practice &I asked him to address the Court on the correct way when I'm done.You will always hear them say, "My Lord, that's the practice," without citing the relevant authorities they are relying on. A senior lawyer once used such line on another lawyer in court, and in my opinion, it was used as a tool of intimidation; and the other lawyer humorously retorted – “ It’s called millennium practice” I had a good laugh in court that day. When you you get some Bench rulings in your favour against them they wait to harass you to come to them & for date to inform you that they are still your senior no matter your legal prowess. This lovely group of lawyers can’t just wait for the court to start sitting for them to mention their cases out of turn. God help you if you happen to be in court full of them, and you are not one of them. 20 Likes 1 Share
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Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by ijekul(m): 9:11am On Oct 05, 2017 |
5. INTERIOR DECORATORS
Now you are thinking what interior
decoration has to do with law practice. Just
wait till you meet these set of lawyers who
always seek for an adjournment in other
“to put our house in order”. I use to imagine
what house they are even putting in order,
and why they will have to wait till they get
to court before they realise they have to put
their house in order. It’s okay if once in a
while you ask for an adjournment to
regularize your processes and all of that;
but when it becomes a routine and the line
of “to put our house in order” is always
used, maybe lawyers like that need to quit
law practice and consider venturing into the
business of interior decoration. Then, they
will not only be free to put their houses in
order, but would also help others to put their
houses in order and get paid for doing that.
If you are among this category, you will
have to buy me dinner for this sound career
advice.
I know this my list is not exhaustive, so let’s
hear your own categories. 32 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by ijekul(m): 9:11am On Oct 05, 2017 |
5. INTERIOR DECORATORS
Now you are thinking what interior
decoration has to do with law practice. Just
wait till you meet these set of lawyers who
always seek for an adjournment in other
“to put our house in order”. I use to imagine
what house they are even putting in order,
and why they will have to wait till they get
to court before they realise they have to put
their house in order. It’s okay if once in a
while you ask for an adjournment to
regularize your processes and all of that;
but when it becomes a routine and the line
of “to put our house in order” is always
used, maybe lawyers like that need to quit
law practice and consider venturing into the
business of interior decoration. Then, they
will not only be free to put their houses in
order, but would also help others to put their
houses in order and get paid for doing that.
If you are among this category, you will
have to buy me dinner for this sound career
advice.
I know this my list is not exhaustive, so let’s
hear your own categories. 6 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by ijekul(m): 9:12am On Oct 05, 2017 |
6) THE ALIGNMENT LAWYERS : You see them always aligning themselves with the submission of their Learned Friends. They are the laziest set of Lawyers existing. To them what matters is their appearance fees., they don't prepare for their cases. They only come to court to align themselves with the submission of their learned Friends. They are also in the appellant Courts always aligning themselves with the submission of their Learned Brothers. I didn't say anything oh lol.. You will also find them amidst the new wigs who have sworn never to read a sign post bcox of the law school stress, to them all that matters is that they are already called to Bar, they don't research nor read. Also, You will find them amongst government lawyers especially those in the civil department who follow the old patterns without improving. 20 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by Mologi(m): 9:14am On Oct 05, 2017 |
Weitin concern me..... when I am not studying... "charge and bail".... 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by ijekul(m): 6:48pm On Oct 05, 2017 |
7) BOWING DOWN LAWYERS/APPEARING
WITH ME LAWYERS/WITH ME LAWYERS :
They are always appearing with other
lawyers. You can never see them talk in the
Court but will be d 1st to correct a Lawyer
who is addressing the Court.
They are always standing up and bowing
down but you will not see them do matters
on their own.
Most of them become SAN faster because
they are always appearing with other lawyers
in many cases. You can add yours... 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by princechiemekam(m): 7:31am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Kkk |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by Ayo4251(m): 7:31am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Lol |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by Nobody: 7:31am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Hahahahaha |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by niqqaclaimz(m): 7:31am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Ok |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by DanielsParker(m): 7:31am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Law sucks 1 Like |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by lovingyouhun: 7:31am On Oct 06, 2017 |
I've got nothing to say |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by SWORD419(m): 7:34am On Oct 06, 2017 |
[right][/right] like if u've understood nothing 4 Likes |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by Nobody: 7:34am On Oct 06, 2017 |
1 Like
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Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by esthel(f): 7:36am On Oct 06, 2017 |
I can relate ...interior decorators are just time wasters 7 Likes |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by Zamad(m): 7:37am On Oct 06, 2017 |
OK O |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by olafunny(m): 7:38am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Falz the bahd guy type. Dem go entertain u through out d session 6 Likes |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by StunnerG(m): 7:38am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Lol Nairaland una no try oh After about 5000- 10,000 words from the Op Nobody fit spare am just 1 like Taaa Wicked people |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by olafunny(m): 7:39am On Oct 06, 2017 |
DanielsParker:booby |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by Nbote(m): 7:41am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Charge and Bail lawyers and Charge and Discharge lawyers. Abeg make una follow me buy data 1 Like |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by Nobody: 7:41am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Lol...you didn't mention any attribute of a good lawyer though |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by BornnAgainChild(f): 7:43am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Very interesting write- up...you try But then amongst all which one are you Rem all liars will go to hell fire 2 Likes |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by DIKEnaWAR: 7:43am On Oct 06, 2017 |
Hahaha haha so true |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by YungRichG1: 7:44am On Oct 06, 2017 |
ijekul: oga OP this write up was first published on the Nigerian Bar Association Facebook page ceteris paribus i deem it fit that you give reference and acknowledgement to the group stated there in by providing us with a link i rest my case. mobile./140800922628989?view=permalink&id=1707119885997077&refid=18&_ft_=qid.6473683260096486835%3Amf_story_key.1707119885997077%3Atop_level_post_id.1707119885997077%3Atl_objid.1707119885997077&__tn__=%2AW-R 6 Likes |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by BornnAgainChild(f): 7:46am On Oct 06, 2017 |
DanielsParker: Says who My dear Law is one of those professions that get you respect in this country You have a right of say, anywhere without being bullied Unlike we wey be business managers...na slap them go first give us 6 Likes |
Re: Weird Types Of Lawyers You Meet In The Courtroom by zoedew: 7:46am On Oct 06, 2017 |
You forgot to tell us which category you belong to. |
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