After English Exam

Akpors' dad: How was the paper?

Akpors: It was easy but question 5 confused me.

Akpors' dad: What was the question?

Akpors: Question 5 wanted the past tense of "THINK".
I thought and thought and thought but I ended up writing"THUNK"

Nice collections you got here.

Lwkmh

AKPORS IN GHANA

Atongo was getting into the shower just as his wife was finishing up her shower,
when the doorbell rang.
Mrs Atongo quickly wrapped a
towel and rushed downstairs.
When she opened the door,
Guess who..it was
Akpors,their next-door neighbour.
Before she said a word,Akpors said,
"I'll give you Ghc20 if u drop that towel."
After thinking for a moment,Mrs Atongo
dropped her
towel and stood naked in front of
Akpors, after a few seconds,Akpors gave her Ghc 20 and left.
The woman wrapped back up in the towel
and got back upstairs.
When she got to the bathroom,
her husband Atongo asked her,
"Who was that?"
"It was Akpors the next door neighbour" she replied.
"Great" Atongo asked again, "did he give
you the Ghc 20 he owes me?"

Doctors r still tryin to revive Mrs Atongo insyd
Akoto lante polyclinic.

Okon (laughing): My friend (akpors) has stolen my girlfriend’s number
from my phone

John: So what’s next?
.
,
.
.
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
Okon: The idiot is sending romantic messages to his
own sister.

Girl invited her boyfriend over
for dinner in her house, so that he could meet
her parents.
While they were eating, it
started raining heavily. The girl’s mother said:
“Akpors, I think
you should sleep over here
because this rain
shows no sign of stopping
anytime soon” After eating the mom went to
the toilet and
the father went to sleep while
the girl went to
the kitchen to clean the plates,
when the girl and the mother returned, akpors
was no
longer there.
As they were busy wondering
where he was,
he came back really soaking wet. Mother: “Where were you and
why are you so
wet?”
Akpors: “I went home to get my
pyjamas!

Lwkmd

Akpors, a driver who survived in a
tragic accident which rendered 49
people dead at the spot was
remanded in police custody to assist
in police investigation.. .
Akpors was interrogated
Policeman: …So akpors, how did you
end up killing 49 people
Akpors: I was driving @80km/h when I
saw two men crossing the road. On
the other side, a wedding was taking
place. I hit the brakes but they failed,
so I had to make a choice; either hit
the two men or run into the
wedding party.
Policeman: Hit the two men of
course!
Akpors: exactly, We think alike ooo! but
after hitting one, the other man
escaped into the wedding party, so I
went after him.
Na akpors fault ??

Oboi! Lmao, men u 2much

born2fuck:
Akpors, a driver who survived in a
tragic accident which rendered 49
people dead at the spot was
remanded in police custody to assist
in police investigation.. .
Akpors was interrogated
Policeman: …So akpors, how did you
end up killing 49 people
Akpors: I was driving @80km/h when I
saw two men crossing the road. On
the other side, a wedding was taking
place. I hit the brakes but they failed,
so I had to make a choice; either hit
the two men or run into the
wedding party.
Policeman: Hit the two men of
course!
Akpors: exactly, We think alike ooo! but
after hitting one, the other man
escaped into the wedding party, so I
went after him.
Na akpors fault ??

That was something else...keep it coming!
.
U have finally discovered ur talent..forget those bleeping tinz o!

ayobase:

That was something else...keep it coming!
.
U have finally discovered ur talent..forget those bleeping tinz o!

these are not my jokes,I am not a comedian, they are internet jokes

Dis guy don make me dey cry here

LWKMD!

Akpos wan
die?
A Warri tenant walked in & saw his landlord’s son
trying to commit suicide & a brief conversation
ensued:
Tenant: Akpos! Wetin you de do so?
Akpos: I dey try commit suicide, as Papa dey always
complain say my life dey worthless!
Tenant: That one no good now… but why you come
tie de rope for your waist?
Akpos: Bros, no be small thing o! I bin tie de rope for
neck, I NEARLY DIE!

Akpos Papa
Papa Akpos :- My pikin say you drive am commot for
school, Wetin he do
Akpos’ Teacher :- Your son no know book at all, He
no fit spell ” LION ”
Papa Akpos :- Ah Ah…You know say na SMALL
pikin……You for tell am make he spell SMALL
ANIMAL like ” MOSQUITO

Today’s lesson at school is Animal science
Teacher:wot is a baby lizard called?
Akpos: a baby lizard is called lizzybaby.
The Exam
During the exam, Akpors kept looking under the table,
then he would write on the answer sheet. His teacher
saw him doing that & thought he was copying. When
collecting the paper after the exam..
Teacher: I’m gonna minus 10 marks.
Akpors: Hiiaaa!! Why sir?
Teacher: For copying.
Akpors: How do you know that I was copying?
Teacher: I saw you looking under the table.
Akpors: *laughing* Question 9 said, “STUDY THE
TABLE BELOW “

I love dis jokes

Come who get this thread self,shey na copyright or born2fuck? Ok i don see am. Nice jokes bro.

born2fuck: these are not my jokes,I am not a comedian, they are internet jokes

Of course, I do know...ur remixes are better buddy!

Doctor and Akpors
Dr: Do exercise daily for good
health
Akpors: Sir I play Football Cricket,
Tennis daily.
Dr: How long do you play?
..
.
.
Akpors: Until the battery in my
mobile goes down

Akpos went for interview

Interviewer: Tell me the opposite ofGood
Akpos: Hmm... Bad
Interviewer: Come.
Akpos: Go.
Interviewer: Ugly.
Akpos: Fine.
Interviewer: U're wrong
Akpos:U're right
Interviewer: Shut up
Akpos: Keep talking.
Interviewer: Ok now stop all that.
Akpos: Ok now carry on all that.
Interviewer: Get Out.
Akpos: Come In.
Interviewer: Oh my God.
Akpos: Oh my Devil.
Interviewer: U r Rejected.
Akpos: I m selected
Interviewer: Eish!!!! Akposl; Wow!!!!!

Akpors spat saliva and rubbed on his head. Teacher: Akpors! What stupid thing are you
doing? ...Why are you smearing your head with saliva? Akpors: Madam! I overheard my Mum last
night telling my Dad in their Bedroom, that if it is hard and not entering properly, he should apply
saliva on the head and it will surely enter! Because what you are teaching is not entering, I have 2
rub saliva on my head.

Its Akpors again . One day a techer fell asleep in class, akpors went to him and said ''teacher, are
you sleeping?'' ''no!!'', the teacher replied. Then akpors asked,''what are you doing then?'' ''i am
talking to God'', replied the teacher. Then the next day, akpors fell asleep as well. The teacher went
to him and said "akpors, are you sleeping in my class?" "No!" replied akpors. "What are you doing
then?" asked the teacher. "i am talking to God as well", said akpors. The angry teacher shouted,
"what did your God say?" then akpors said, "He said he never talked to you yesterday

born2fuck: Akpors is dying of cancer, but keeps
telling people he
is dying of AIDS.
His son asked Dad why?
He answered, so that when I am
dead, no one will
dare sleep with your mum.

I don't get it!

This thrd dey make konji catch me,9ce work @poster,keep it up!

Mrs Akpors lost 3 panties in her house and blamed her maid in the presence of the husband - Mr Akpors.

The embarrassed maid said,
"Oga, thank God say u dey here, U be my witness. You know say I no dey wear panties".
YEPAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!
Mrs Akpors fainted.

MuhMubRaj: I don't get it!

Will u bleep a widow whose husband died as a result of AIDS?

born2fuck: Girl invited her boyfriend over
for dinner in her house, so that he could meet
her parents.
While they were eating, it
started raining heavily. The girl’s mother said:
“Akpors, I think
you should sleep over here
because this rain
shows no sign of stopping
anytime soon” After eating the mom went to
the toilet and
the father went to sleep while
the girl went to
the kitchen to clean the plates,
when the girl and the mother returned, akpors
was no
longer there.
As they were busy wondering
where he was,
he came back really soaking wet. Mother: “Where were you and
why are you so
wet?”
Akpors: “I went home to get my
pyjamas!

Lwkmd

lmao

born2fuck: An angry wife (Ekaitte) 2 her husband (Akpors) on phone.

Ekaitte: Where the hell are you? ...

Akpors: Honey, u remember dat gold shop where u saw the diamond
necklace & totally fell in luv wit it?

Ekaitte (relaxed): Yes, my king

Akpors : remember I had no cash 2 buy it 4 u dat day & I said I will
buy it 4 u one day?

Ekaitte (totally relaxed with a smile & a blush): Yes I remember my love!

Akpors: Good, I am in a beer palour next to that shop!

can't stop laughing!!

[quote author=dopeJemi]mehnn. i don laff piss 4 body, very funi kip it up bro [oh! U laff piss 4 body..smh..wondas shall neva end]

SEE MATHEMATICAL AKPOS IN CLASS, THE TEACHER IS ASKING HIM SOME
LITTLE MATHS QUESTIONS.. READ D CONVERSATIONS BELOW ITS FUNNY!
Teacher: If I give you 2 cats and another 2 cats and another 2 cats, how many cats will you
have?
AKPOS: Seven, Sir.
Teacher: No, listen carefully. If I gave you 2 cats, and another 2 cats and another 2 cats,
how many will you have?
AKPOS: Seven.
Teacher: Let me put it to you differently. If I give you 2apples, and another 2 apples and
another 2 apples, howmany will you have?
AKPOS: Six.
Teacher: Good. Now if I gave you 2 cats, and another 2cats and another 2 cats, how many
cats will you have?
AKPOS: Seven!!!
Angry Teacher : Where did you get ur seven from?
AKPOS: (Angrilly!) Because I already get 1 cat for House!

Little Akpors came in to the kitchen and found his grandmother eating breakfast.
"Where is mom and dad he asks?" His grandmother replied: "They'r still in bed." Akpors smiled and went to play.
Two hours later he came back and asked,"Where is mom & dad?" His grandmother replied: "They are still in bed."He
giggled and went back to play.
He came back at lunch and asked,"Where is mom & dad, are they still in bed?" His grandmother replied: Yea...Akpors
laughed. What d laughin abt?"asked his grandmother.
Akpors replied: "Last night dad came into my room asking for Vaseline and I gave him super glue

little akpors gets on a city bus and
sits right behind the driver and
starts yelling, ''If my dad was a
bull and my mom a cow I'd be a
little bull.''The driver starts getting
mad at noisy akpors, who
continues with, ''If my dad was an
elephant and my mom a girl
elephant I would be a little
elephant.''
akpors goes on wi...th several
animals until the bus driver gets
angry and yells at akpors,
''What if your dad was a drunk
and your mom was a
prostitute?!''
akpors smiles and says, ''I would
be a bus driver!''