It baffles me when we address some married men as being "responsible",such that I took out time to study some of them I know and discovered they are in no manner really better than some bachelors.
These so called responsible married men are the first to enter bars and last to leave,we see them often in the clubs,they fight publicly and are notorious womanisers. I really want someone to correct my impression because I really can't find ant iota of responsibility in these set of men or is there another definition of being responsible I know not?perhaps your views on this topic will enlighten us.

i disagree with you there is some Good men out there! And there are bad once also

its their pipe line..
mtheeeeeeeeeew!!
Madam,abeg arrange full pot of garri,mix peper soup and bean together..
add enuf kpomo..no time

Everest9: i disagree with you there is some Good men out there! And there are bad once also

A responsible man iz one who has responsblity and does it.

saintvc: A responsible man iz one who has responsblity and does it.

What responsibilities are you talking about ni?

ned4Ify: its their pipe line..
mtheeeeeeeeeew!!
Madam,abeg arrange full pot of garri,mix peper soup and bean together..
add enuf kpomo..no time

?

Na fuss!
Married man pay house rent, i pay my own.
Married man is responsible to his wife and maybe child(ren), i'm responsible to my girlfriends.
Married man pay bills, i do like-wise.
So what responsibilities makes a married man responsible? The status or the ring? Abeg frontpage please.

D-Explorer:
Na fuss!
Married man pay house rent, i pay my own.
Married man is responsible to his wife and maybe child(ren), i'm responsible to my girlfriends.
Married man pay bills, i do like-wise.
So what responsibilities makes a married man responsible? The status or the ring? Abeg frontpage please.

Some of em hardly puts on their wedding ring.

ifihearam:

Some of em hardly puts on their wedding ring.

LOL. In order to explore more grounds na

Been married is a status, not a yardstick for bn responsible

I have to say that despite all the negatives we hear about married men here, there are still good ones out there. I know cos I'm married to one!

A married man is considered 'responsible' because he is now in another stage of life which single men can NEVER appreciate untill they get married!

A girfriend is different from a WIFE!

Knowing that you life begins from the day you walk down the aisle can change a man.

Fatheing a child is the height of it!

My husband is NOT the same person I married. He's now both a husband and a father!

Doesnt stop him from hanging out with his friends till late at night, but knowing he has a wife and a little child back home automatically puts him on a 'reserve' mode!

If he drinks 2 bottles of beer, he now takes 1. If he came home by 2 a.m on a club night in the past, he now gets home by 11 pm!

Any man who has regards for his family will do the same!

I wish all young men getting married these days will realize this!

My sister above has already said it,being a responsible person gat zilch to do with being married.

If you doubt, ask all those women who complain about their husbands bitterly in this section

Ujujoan: I have to say that despite all the negatives we hear about married men here, there are still good ones out there. I know cos I'm married to one!

A married man is considered 'responsible' because he is now in another stage of life which single men can NEVER appreciate untill they get married!

A girfriend is different from a WIFE!

Knowing that you life begins from the day you walk down the aisle can change a man.

Fatheing a child is the height of it!

My husband is NOT the same person I married. He's now both a husband and a father!

Doesnt stop him from hanging out with his friends till late at night, but knowing he has a wife and a little child back home automatically puts him on a 'reserve' mode!

If he drinks 2 bottles of beer, he now takes 1. If he came home by 2 a.m on a club night in the past, he now gets home by 11 pm!

Any man who has regards for his family will do the same!

I wish all young men getting married these days will realize this!

I like ur submission but club starts by 11pm so where's the fun na? Anyways the kind of married friends I have will not encourage to get married anytime soon......smh

ifihearam:


I like ur submission but club starts by 11pm so where's the fun na? Anyways the kind of married friends I have will not encourage to get married anytime soon......smh

My dear in this local time we live, club dont dey close by 11pm. Lol!

Ujujoan:

My dear in this local time we live, club dont dey close by 11pm. Lol!

Really Na by dat time we dey get set to club ni

ifihearam:

Really Na by dat time we dey get set to club ni

Mba nu . . . who wants to be kidnapped ni

Men - and women alike - are responsible, and ought to be characterized thusly in virtue of their character, and not marital status.

Missy_B: Men - and women alike - are responsible, and ought to be characterized thusly in virtue of their character, and not marital status.

True . . . But a person's status can influence h/her behaviour!

For instance, I buy roasted corn on the street everyday and nobody cares; but a Governor who did same recently made front page news!

Marriage as a status should institue some behavioural changes in both men and women . . resulting from changed circumstances!

That's a fact we can't argue.

Ujujoan:
But a person's status can influence h/her behaviour!

Very true! Status may change behaviour, but not character.
Behaviors can be feigned but not character; and behaviors not in line with your character are usually temporary.
Eventually, the real you comes out, and we hear ''he wasn't like this when he was wooing me/poor/seeking help etc.

Point is, people can hardly/not change their nature/character/makeup.
A man that is by nature irresponsible, grew up avoiding or neglecting his responsibilities, has no sense of family value can never wake up one morning and become responsible simply because he got married yesterday. . .Just as a stingy poor man cannot become a philanthropist overnight simply because he won the lottery.

Ujujoan:
Marriage as a status should institue some behavioural changes in both men and women . . resulting from changed circumstances!

Emphasis on should ; ought to. That's a supposition; theory, but in practice, what's the situation like? - a quick glance through the familiy section before you reply, pls. Lol!

Missy_B:
Very true! Status may change behaviour, but not character.
Behaviors can be feigned but not character; and it's quite difficult, if not impossible, to keep up a behavior that isn't in line with your character. Eventually, the real you comes out, and we hear ''he wasn't like this when he was wooing me/poor/seeking help etc.

Point is, people can hardly/not change their nature/character/makeup.
A man that is by nature irresponsible, grew up avoiding or neglecting his responsibilities, has no sense of family value can never wake up one morning and become responsible simply because he got married last night. . .Just as a stingy poor man cannot become a philanthropist overnight simply because he won the lottery.


Emphasis on should ; ought to. That's a supposition; theory, but in practice, what's the situation like? - a quick glance through the familiy section before you reply, pls. Lol!

I agree . . .

We are saying the same thing in different ways.

Someone keeping late night to me is a behaviour, not necessarily a character!

And I'm not suggesting an over-night change . . . more like a gradual thing!

It's impossible NOT to change with circumstances.

A man who still wants to keep clubbing day and night when he now has a family at home is plain irresponsible. But for a single guy, it's not that big a deal!

A man can reduce the amount of money he spends on beer because he now has to buy pampers and pay for ante-natal visits!

It's ineveitable!

Ujujoan:

I agree . . .

We are saying the same thing in different ways.

Perhaps!

Ujujoan:

A man who still wants to keep clubbing day and night when he now has a family at home is plain irresponsible. But for a single guy, it's not that big a deal!

And there are tons of married men like that.
A few days ago a lady launched a thread about her husband clubbing w/out her. . .If marriage made people responsible, was that man absent the day change came knocking or he's simply immune to change?

Ujujoan:
A man can reduce the amount of money he spends on beer because he now has to buy pampers and pay for ante-natal visits!

Ah! You've not seen/heard of husbands and fathers that spend money in beer parlors or on young girls while his children's school fees haven't even been paid let alone pocket money given to the kids?
Perhaps, you married a man with a good head on his shoulders . . . Just dey thank God!
There are too many useless married men out there that mere listening to their stories is enough to make one question the seriousness of the institution.

Missy_B:
Perhaps!


And there are tons of married men like that.
A few days ago a lady launched a thread about her husband clubbing w/out her. . .If marriage made people responsible, was that man absent the day change came knocking or he's simply immune to change?


Ah! You've not seen/heard of husbands and fathers that spend money in beer parlors or on young girls while his children's school fees haven't even been paid let alone pocket money given to the kids?
Perhaps, you married a man with a good head on his shoulders . . . Just dey thank God!
There are too many useless married men out there that mere listening to their stories is enough to make one question the seriousness of the institution.

Lmao

I thot people were saying all the good responsible men are married ....and that wat we have left is just bfs not husbands...Dont even know the difference anymore...well, married men change your ways or else God will change it, with repercussions .

Missy_B:
Perhaps!


And there are tons of married men like that.
A few days ago a lady launched a thread about her husband clubbing w/out her. . .If marriage made people responsible, was that man absent the day change came knocking or he's simply immune to change?


Ah! You've not seen/heard of husbands and fathers that spend money in beer parlors or on young girls while his children's school fees haven't even been paid let alone pocket money given to the kids?
Perhaps, you married a man with a good head on his shoulders . . . Just dey thank God!
There are too many useless married men out there that mere listening to their stories is enough to make one question the seriousness of the institution.

Lol . . .

It's true sha!

I guess the idea of married men being responsible originated from how things 'should' be!

Ujujoan:

Lol . . .

It's true sha!

I guess the idea of married men being responsible originated from how things 'should' be!

Exactly!

Missy_B: Men - and women alike - are responsible, and ought to be characterized thusly in virtue of their character, and not marital status.

5likes

Some married men are responsible and some single men are responsible.

@sista Ujujoan, how is married life? all is good? glad to hear that.....ok let me start with the &%¤#$£@ you wrote:

Ujujoan: I have to say that despite all the negatives we hear about married men here, there are still good ones out there. I know cos I'm married to one!

and there are equally gazillions of responsible UNMARRIED men out there.......was these responsible married men NOT responsible bachelors before?! or did that marriage turn them into responsible men after they said "I DO"?

A married man is considered 'responsible' because he is now in another stage of life which single men can NEVER appreciate untill they get married!

are you saying that because single men decide to NOT get married, they become IRRESPONSIBLE?! many of us KNOW what it takes to be married, and because we RESPECT and VALUE marriage, we rather live our live the way WE see fit. how can that be irresponsible?!
i would think that an irresponsible man is one that does NOT know what it takes to BE/STAY happily married, but yet gladly gets married and fail miserably at it!

A girfriend is different from a WIFE!

of course she is, but the demands and responsibility that is involved in caring for each of them are the same. i am talking about proper gf (like what you and your bf were before you decided to get married), not the BS 2 day old r/ships.

Knowing that you life begins from the day you walk down the aisle can change a man.

BWAAAAAAAH!!!!!! so are you now saying that a man's life only begins when he gets married?! OH LAWD!!!!! so what was he before that? a chicken, a donkey?! yes, a man's life changes when he gets married but it CAN never be considered "better" than a man who is still in a r/ship.
what ypou are saying is as crazy as saying that "if two people are dating and have a great r/ship together, when they decide to now get married, if they both say yes then their life will be better, and if they decide to keep on dating then their life will be worse off. NONSENSE! marriage today is just a bloody piece of paper, but pls care to share with us what a married man gain that the ones who keep dating dont.

Fatheing a child is the height of it!

are you saying that if I have a child with my gf (that said no to marriage), i will be LESS of a father than the married man who said yes to marriage?!

My husband is NOT the same person I married. He's now both a husband and a father!

again, care to tell us what is the difference between a husband & father AND and boyfriend & father?!

Doesnt stop him from hanging out with his friends till late at night, but knowing he has a wife and a little child back home automatically puts him on a 'reserve' mode!

are you now saying that the guys who have GFs at home, will rather hang out with their friend instead of caring and thinking about their GF and baby at home?!

If he drinks 2 bottles of beer, he now takes 1. If he came home by 2 a.m on a club night in the past, he now gets home by 11 pm!

i am glad your husband changed but in what are these facts relevant with responsibilities in life? are you saying that your husband started drinking less because he was married OR because he had a child? are you now saying that a BF will still drink 2 bottles or still come late from clubs after having a baby? are you saying that responsibility is about NOT drinking two bottle of beers at the club or coming home at 2am? beware of what you will answer here, it is a trap question, lol!

Any man who has regards for his family will do the same!
I wish all young men getting married these days will realize this!

wouldnt you say that it is all about WHY that person went to the club, and NOT about how many drinks they had? if that person was "THAT" responsible (as you like to claim) then they wouldnt find themselves in clubs to begin with...or even drinking alcohol, they would be caring for their wives tucking them in bed and making sure that she is safe and sound at home. god forbid, going clubbing drinking alcohol MUST be an irresponsible behavior, isnt it?
i know many unmarried "responsible" men out there who do not club nor drink, how can you even think that what your hubby does is automatically more responsible than these unmarried guys, simply because he got a ring and said i do?!

i am sorry to say that your husband is not any more responsible than gazillions of men out there. the fact that HIS life has changed DOES NOT make him any more responsible than others out there. they have different goals, therefore different tasks to fill, and these task are EQUALLY important. the fact that you believe that because a man is married, his tasks in life are more important than single men, and therefore makes married men more responsible, is completely flawed and wrong....it also clearly tell us all that you believe that a gf with child is not as important as a wife with child. come on now!!!!!

MRbrownJAY: @sista Ujujoan, how is married life? all is good? glad to hear that.....ok let me start with the &%¤#$£@ you wrote:



and there are equally gazillions of responsible UNMARRIED men out there.......was these responsible married men NOT responsible bachelors before?! or did that marriage turn them into responsible men after they said "I DO"?



are you saying that because single men decide to NOT get married, they become IRRESPONSIBLE?! many of us KNOW what it takes to be married, and because we RESPECT and VALUE marriage, we rather live our live the way WE see fit. how can that be irresponsible?!
i would think that an irresponsible man is one that does NOT know what it takes to BE/STAY happily married, but yet gladly gets married and fail miserably at it!



of course she is, but the demands and responsibility that is involved in caring for each of them are the same. i am talking about proper gf (like what you and your bf were before you decided to get married), not the BS 2 day old r/ships.



BWAAAAAAAH!!!!!! so are you now saying that a man's life only begins when he gets married?! OH LAWD!!!!! so what was he before that? a chicken, a donkey?! yes, a man's life changes when he gets married but it CAN never be considered "better" than a man who is still in a r/ship.
what ypou are saying is as crazy as saying that "if two people are dating and have a great r/ship together, when they decide to now get married, if they both say yes then their life will be better, and if they decide to keep on dating then their life will be worse off. NONSENSE! marriage today is just a bloody piece of paper, but pls care to share with us what a married man gain that the ones who keep dating dont.



are you saying that if I have a child with my gf (that said no to marriage), i will be LESS of a father than the married man who said yes to marriage?!



again, care to tell us what is the difference between a husband & father AND and boyfriend & father?!



are you now saying that the guys who have GFs at home, will rather hang out with their friend instead of caring and thinking about their GF and baby at home?!



i am glad your husband changed but in what is this facts relevant with responsibilities in life? are you saying that your husband started drinking less because he was married OR because he had a child? are you now saying that a BF will still drink 2 bottles or still come late from clubs after having a baby? are you saying that responsibility is about NOT drinking two bottle of beers at the club or coming home at 2am? beware of what you will answer here, it is a trap question, lol!



wouldnt you say that it is all about WHY that person went to the club, and NOT about how many drinks they had? if that person was "THAT" responsible (as you like to claim) then they wouldnt find themselves in clubs to begin with...or even drinking alcohol.
i know many unmarried "responsible" men out there who do not club nor drink, how can you even think that what your hubby does is automatically more responsible than these unmarried guys, simply because he got a ring and said i do?!

i am sorry to say that your husband is not any more responsible than gazillions of men out there. the fact that HIS life has changed DOES NOT make him any more responsible than others out there. they have different goals, therefore different tasks to fill, and these task are EQUALLY important. the fact that you believe that because a man is married, his tasks in life are more important than single men, and therefore makes married men more responsible, is completely flawed and wrong....it also clearly tell us all that you believe that a gf with child is not as important as a wife with child. come on now!!!!!

Ahan MBJ no vex na . . . . I'm not calling you irresponsible!

Just saying a married man that behaves irresponsibly is an outrage, but a single man can get away with any irresponsible act and not be crucified!

You and all these your big grammar sef!

^^^^ ah ok, my bad......as you probably know my stand on marriage, i take offense when i hear that married men are "considered" more responsible than single men.

Lol . . .

Dont worry, you can hold on to your bachelorhood . . . you are safe!

Why you all waste time with these SMALL BOYS? They all looking for a sniff of our T0T0's. Are you married women looking for toy boys?

Anyway you all got time.