Are you blind?: This question is common especially when you mistakenly step on someone’s toes or hit someone while walking. You may also be asked if someone is trying to point out something to you and still do not see it.

Are you mad?: Are you out of your mind? They mean the same to Nigerians. This particular question usually precedes a fight. It is provocative and is not unusual to find opposite sexes throwing them at each other. The pidgin way of asking which isn’t also uncommon is “You dey Craze?”

Do you know who I am?: People who ask this question have one characteristic. They have loud voices and usually don’t know anybody (mostly). This question is asked to frighten people and make the “asker” win an argument.

Who do you think you are?: A provocative question usually asked by someone who has been bullied. It is also a response to question number 3.
How far?: This is not a question although it sounds like it. They are not asking you the distance travelled. You are only being asked how you are doing. It is another way of saying hello.

Where’s my change?: Most of the time Nigerians prefer to say the word ”Change” instead of “Balance”. Nigerians don’t like stress especially on English words. They prefer to stress their native dialects e.g Chi-ne-ke, O-ba-ni-ko-ro, Ina-kwa-na, Me-se-re, O-ghe-ne-ru-kev-we, O-ri-tse-mu-ji-mi. I bet you don’t understand this. This question is very common and asked by most Nigerians especially when in transit. The bus conductors who prefer to keep mum rather than giving people the balance of their money usually provoke such questions.

Why?: This question is directed at nothing in particular. Our enduring nature allows us to reply complex and awful situations with this word “why”. For example you hear Boko Haram just bombed a city and the response you get is ‘why na”. Really? Are you asking me.

What is happening?: Nigerians like to pry into things that do not concern them or anything that attracts a crowd. E.g some people circle a place unsually, someone comes in to ask “Wetin happen” and the anonymous response is “He stole”. Usually further questions are not asked like “what did he steal?” The asker walks away or joins the crowd.

Has anyone come?: This question is peculiar to Nigerians usually because of the African Time factor. Nigerians prefer to strut in to meetings, events and shows after it has begun in order to show off their glamorous outfits (maybe). It is also rampantly asked among the working class from whom you will often hear (if they are your colleagues) Oga dey office? This is to find out if the MD or Manager or senior colleague is in the office.

Haven’t they paid you?: This question is usually asked by female folks and the respondents are their boyfriends. This is for them to know when they can begin to make those money-consuming demands (Brazilian hair, Peruvian hair, Indian hair, dog fur, leopard slippers, human hair, Silverbird Movie tickets, crocodile-skin bags etc). I guess.

Na you dey feed me?: Some questions don’t make much sense to us in British English, hence the need to place emphatic stress on the pidgin language. This question is asked by an angry person who is probably being bossed around by someone (usually a distant relative) that has no financial relevance to him or her.

Na your papa get road?: I reserve my comments on this question. I have heard it a lot of times. In fact, you will have seen (many times) an aggrieved driver swerve from behind your car (because you had been too slow to move after the traffic light passed you), unwind their glasses and ask you this question. They won’t wait for you to respond before hurling curses after the question (with clenched fists) and sitting back to adjust their seatbelts before speeding away.

Are you alright?: Trust me you are not. If a Nigerian should ask you this question, you should check yourself again. In pidgin you might hear “Wetin dey worry you? If you are asked this question, it means that you have acted or spoken inappropriately. Nigerians know it all.

These are the 13 questions that I remember, in your opinion are they true or false. Are there other missing questions?

Source: http://naijapose.com/13-questions-nigerians-usually-ask/