Alex the Lion: Did he just say "Grand Central Station," or "My aunt's constipation"?



MADAGASCAR

Marty the Zebra: I'm ten years old. My life is half over and I don't even know if I'm black with white stripes or white with black stripes!

MADAGASCAR

Julian: Welcome to Madagascar.
Marty the Zebra: Mada-who-ah?
Julian: No. Not who-ah. As-car.


MADAGASCAR

Julian: [singing] I like to move it, move it / She like to move it, move it / He like to move it, move it / You like to, *move it*!


MADAGASCAR

Julian: Can you not see you have insulted the freak?


MADAGASCAR

Christopher: You're beautiful.
Marisa: So are you.
Christopher: Thank you for being here.
Marisa: I only came to tell you that this, you and me, can't go anywhere beyond this evening. It just can't.
Christopher: Well, then, you should've worn a different dress.


MAID IN MANHATTAN

Harry Wormwood: A book? What do you want a book for?
Matilda: To read.
Harry Wormwood: To read? Why would you want to read when you got the television set sitting right in front of you? There's nothing you can get from a book that you can't get from a television faster.


MATILDA

Harry Wormwood: I'm Right, You're Wrong.
Harry Wormwood: I'm Smart, You're Dumb.
Harry Wormwood: I'm Big, You're Little.
Harry Wormwood: And there's nothing you can do about it!


MATILDA

Agatha Trunchbull: I have never been able to understand why small children are so disgusting. They're the bane of my life. They're like insects: they should be got rid of as early as possible. Hah,
[makes spraying gesture]
Agatha Trunchbull: psst! My idea of a perfect school is one in which there are no children, at all.

MATILDA

Agatha Trunchbull: I cannot for the life of me understand why small children take so long to grow up. I think they do it deliberately, just to annoy me.


MATILDA

Steven Mills: I think, I think,
Celeste Martin: What?
Steven Mills: Would I scare you, if I told you I love you?
Celeste Martin: Not unless you hit me at the same time.
Steven Mills: I'm serious.
Celeste Martin: So am I!



MY STEP MOTHER IS AN ALIEN

Nicole: My whole life will be ruined.
Andre: No. No, no. Your life will not be ruined. Mine maybe, but yours won't.
Nicole: He'll hate me!
Andre: No, no, he won't hate you.
Nicole: Yes, he will! I'm going to die!





MY FATHER THE HERO

shadowcat holds onto his legs and draws juggernut into the earth halfly, so he won't be able to move and she emerges up

Juggernut: Do you know who I am?, I'm the juggernut you b*tch, (breaks himself out of the earth and pursued shadowcat smashing walls down with his head)

The line had so much action and the way he got himself free was awesome.

X-men 3

Professor Henry Higgins: By George, Eliza, the streets will be strewn with the bodies of men shooting themselves for your sake before I'm done with you.


MY FAIR LADY

Vinny Gambini: Your Honor, may I have permission to treat Ms. Vito as a hostile witness?
Mona Lisa Vito: You think I'm hostile now, wait 'til you see me tonight.
Judge Chamberlain Haller: Do you two know each other?
Vinny Gambini: Yeah, she's my fiancÈe.
Judge Chamberlain Haller: Well, that would certainly explain the hostility.


MY COUSIN VINNY

Jim: I would like to make an announcement. There is a beautiful woman masturbating on my bed.



AMERICAN PIE

Jessica: You've never had an orgasm? Not even manually?
Vicky: I've never tried it.
Jessica: You've never double-clicked your mouse?

AMERICAN PIE

Matt Stifler: What the Bleep!
Brandon's friend 1: Are you a rookie, you look lost?
Matt Stifler: Are you an asshole, you're hairy and you smell like shit!



AMERICAN PIE: BAND CAMP

Matt Stifler: How's that taste, Vande-cock? Mmmm, good, huh? Warm and salty? Yeah, it's a CUM-pletely new formula! 100% Stiffy Juice! SPF 69!


AMERICAN PIE: BAND CAMP

[Stifler thinks champagne is being poured onto his head when he's actually being urinated on from the balcony]
Stifler: I can taste the bubbles.

AMERICAN PIE 2

Stifler: You're a disgrace to men everywhere. I mean, look at the Stifmeister. I got laid 23 times this year, and I'm not counting the hummer I got in the library stacks, baby.
Oz: Here's a new idea for you Stifler. You find a girl, you two become best friends and you don't bother counting how many times you have sex with each other you just laugh at the people who do count.
Stifler: Here's a new idea for you. I'll get you a spoon so you can eat my ass.


AMERICAN PIE 2

Finch: Oh, Jeanine, Jeanine!
Stifler's Mom: Call me Stifler's Mom.
Finch: [orgasmic noise] STIFLER'S MO-O-O - OM!


AMERICAN PIE 2

Michelle: Okay, pretend I'm a hot girl. Now what do you want to do?
Jim: I want to feel your boobs.
Michelle: No, you dingbat. You don't just go groping away. You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.



AMERICAN PIE 2

Stifler: Holy shit dude. I found a Love Machine. Love Machine. Love Machine. Love Machine. Big blue rubber dicks for everyone. The people demand rubber dicks.
Jim: What are you doing?
Stifler: Looking for more lesbian artifacts.
[hands Jim the Love Machine]
Jim: Where did you get this?
Stifler: Finch's ass.


AMERICAN PIE 2

Little Boy: [into walky-talky] Red leader, what's your position?
Stifler: [on walky-talky] I'm touchin' his ass, I'm touchin' his ass, I'm touchin his ass, I'm touchin' his ass,
Little Boy: Mommy!


AMERICAN PIE 2

Nadia: Bleep me, geek!
Sherman: Affirmative!


AMERICAN PIE 2

Babe: I'm not a porkpie.
Zootie: Whatever you say, cutie pie.
Babe: I'm not any kind of pie. I'm just a pig on a mission.


BABE:PIG IN THE CITY

Jack Burton: You know what Jack Burton always says, what the hell?



BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA

Jack Burton: You know what ol' Jack Burton says at a time like this?
Thunder: Who?
Jack Burton: Jack Burton, ME!


BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA

Jack Burton: Son of a bitch must pay!



BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA

Lo Pan: I love you, Miao Yin and I need you.
Miao Yin: No, I don't belong to you!
Lo Pan: Here, take her! Take the bitch!


BIG TROUBLE IN LITTLE CHINA

Robyn Graves: Why do we waste our time with men!
Grace: [who is a lesbian] Not all of us do.



THE BUTCHER'S WIFE