now this is romance section, why are u guys tutning it into religion. the guys says he is a freethinker, how that one concern anybody here, it his choice and his right. if you can advice him, why not leave him the hell alone.

guy @saure said it all, just pretend u are aa christian, u have nothing to loose by doing that. follow her to church, even do wedding in churh with her, do baptism and everything.
afterall most people who go to church and claim bornagain are worse than u. they even preach in church and still sleeep with their fellow chruch members. no one will condenm dem just as long as they claim to be christians. if u need to get along, just pretend u are one of them. its just like igbo man who learns hausa to get alone with them, it does not make him a hausa man.

tell her u are now a christian, u dont even have to act it. she just needs to hear it thats all

I don't agree with sauer. You ought to share your religious views/lack of it with someone you're in a serious r-ship with, otherwise that's being dishonest.

I definitely don't agree with frank 3.16. Pretending to be someone you're not in a r-ship means you're living a lie. Again it's dishonesty, which'll eventually lead to disaster.

frank3.16:
now this is romance section, why are u guys tutning it into religion. the guys says he is a freethinker, how that one concern anybody here, it his choice and his right. if you can advice him, why not leave him the hell alone.

guy @saure said it all, just pretend u are aa christian, u have nothing to loose by doing that. follow her to church, even do wedding in churh with her, do baptism and everything.
afterall most people who go to church and claim bornagain are worse than u. they even preach in church and still sleeep with their fellow chruch members. no one will condenm dem just as long as they claim to be christians. if u need to get along, just pretend u are one of them. its just like igbo man who learns hausa to get alone with them, it does not make him a hausa man.

tell her u are now a christian, u dont even have to act it. she just needs to hear it thats all

yes boss, you and saur are telling me exactly what I wanted to hear mann, thanks a lot bro, I'm already on it,

Yield: I don't agree with sauer. You ought to share your religious views/lack of it with someone you're in a serious r-ship with, otherwise that's being dishonest.

I definitely don't agree with frank 3.16. Pretending to be someone you're not in a r-ship means you're living a lie. Again it's dishonesty, which'll eventually lead to disaster.

hmmm, nice advice, but I believe I can make it work, I don't see it as dishonesty, I see it as diplomacy, even in the bible lot lied a righteous lie, and even abraham lied righteously too, so I believe mine's not different, thanks for the advice though,

eyenCalabar: Well, it love we are talking about here. If you feel you are really in love with her, then that love should be able to change you. If it can't, then you are not in love because love changes people.

I beg to differ.This is the biggest mistake people make in a relationship.Please understand that the girl has her values rooted deep in christianity and she is simply obeying the command 'do not be unequally yoked with a non-believer'.
Tell me something.Suppose you converted just to win her heart,who between God and her would you say converted you?
And after you have her in the box wouldn't the so called conversion lose meaning?
Give her space to make her choice.But don't change for her sake because that is circumstancial Love.
Love is not forced.If she can't love you for faith's sake then relax and let God himself deal with you at his own time not hers.

Love does not change everybody.Everyone has his or her personal beliefs.

eyenCalabar: Well, it love we are talking about here. If you feel you are really in love with her, then that love should be able to change you. If it can't, then you are not in love because love changes people.

pendo89:

I beg to differ.This is the biggest mistake people make in a relationship.Please understand that the girl has her values rooted deep in christianity and she is simply obeying the command 'do not be unequally yoked with a non-believer'.
Tell me something.Suppose you converted just to win her heart,who between God and her would you say converted you?
And after you have her in the box wouldn't the so called conversion lose meaning?
Give her space to make her choice.But don't change for her sake because that is circumstancial Love.
Love is not forced.If she can't love you for faith's sake then relax and let God himself deal with you at his own time not hers.

thanks dear, sound advice,

In the 10 years you've known her, didn't she know about you beliefs or lack of? Well, if she can be open-minded enough, I don't see a problem in that union. The reasons are see (which could be avoided) is. . .

1. Whatever you do, there should never be a conversion argument. She shouldn't try to change you and you shouldn't try to make her a free thinker like you.

2. If the relationship leads to marriage, in what belief should the kids be raised in.

Oh well, this union can't work, so don't even try.

How she got into a relationship with you in the first place is a wonder.
What was she thinking?

Amya: In the 10 years you've known her, didn't she know about you beliefs or lack of? Well, if she can be open-minded enough, I don't see a problem in that union. The reasons are see (which could be avoided) is. . .

1. Whatever you do, there should never be a conversion argument. She shouldn't try to change you and you shouldn't try to make her a free thinker like you.

2. If the relationship leads to marriage, in what belief should the kids be raised in.

Oh well, this union can't work, so don't even try.

we lost contact for a while, I used to be a "fire breathing" christian before I turned to freethinking, and I kinda kept my views to myself, she says she needs someone who is spiritually strong, if we ger married I would love our kids to be brought up in the strict christian way, when they become adults they can choose what to believe in then,

[quote author=2buff]How she got into a relationship with you in the first place is a wonder.
What was she thinking? [/quote hahaha, cos I'm a nice guy ma broda, if u were in her shoes, u would'nt have been able to resist me,] lol

sauer: guy,
I understand your predicament cos I've been there. Am agnostic, but more atheist than agnostic. I've had a lot of girls refuse to associate with me based on my beliefs. Once they know what my stand is regarding all the nonsense called christianity, I could almost immediately feel their reluctance about going all the way. That was back then though.

Subsequently, I learned to take a better approach to handling all of this. At work, in relationships, I just refuse to mention what my beliefs are except it's absolutely critical to do so. I used to leave rooms or situations where someone was preaching some noisy word of god. Now, though, I'd stay and just go about my own business.

Methinks, your mistake is revealing your religious stance to her in the first place. I guess she's scared, cos she'd consider a fellow religious person more predictable. That's what it's about, bro. One minute, and anything you do wrong can be easily tied to your not believing in god. However, you could be a freethinker and she'd never know. You'd be nice to her and be everything. The day she finally does know, your relationship would have bonded so tightly that it won't be based one bit on religion or any other external factors.

At this stage, the egg is broken. You might as well do away with her. I don't know. Perhaps you love her too much to do that. But what's a freethinker getting so involved with love for, anywyz? Try keep your head straight. We know it's all chemicals in there causing all that gobbly (whatever that means!) feeling. Why not find a fellow freethinker partner in the first place? Then there wouldnt be problems. InkedNerd is one of them sweetest freethinkers on NL. So are a couple others. Yes, there are Nigerian girls who are freethinkers!

Bros helep me find one abeg. I am an agnostic living in a religious state ,I neeD a freethinker babe sorry wife too

Look for your type sir.

Welcome to the club lol. If I begin to count the number of missed chances I've had with babes ontop dis agnostic matter, ile asu ile amo.
On a serious note, is it that there are no agnostic girls out there? Or they have evolved to the level where they'd rather pretend to be religious and thus be acceptable to society? You never know with these devious females *kidding*

BoboYekini: Welcome to the club lol. If I begin to count the number of missed chances I've had with babes ontop dis agnostic matter, ile asu ile amo.
On a serious note, is it that there are no agnostic girls out there? Or they have evolved to the level where they'd rather pretend to be religious and thus be acceptable to society? You never know with these devious females *kidding*

why do people fear what they don't understand? It's baffling ma guy, why can't these chicks accept us for who we are,

bolaino: why do people fear what they don't understand? It's baffling ma guy, why can't these chicks accept us for who we are,

like you and i know, its a very nigerian thing...i think now that i may have to relocate to Australia in search of an agnostic partner.

BoboYekini: like you and i know, its a very nigerian thing...i think now that i may have to relocate to Australia in search of an agnostic partner.

ma broda, hahaha, australia far ooooo, but sincerely I believe that there are good freethinking babes in naija, wish u all the best,

Dipwater:

Bros helep me find one abeg. I am an agnostic living in a religious state ,I neeD a freethinker babe sorry wife too

Bros, you can start right here from Nairaland, you know? Go to the religious section and you'll find a number of them agnostic babes.
or rather start a thread right here.
Best thing though, you might just have to leave the country. A number of them christian babes do soften up on their christianity once they move to more advanced, reasonable countries where they've realized they don't need prayers to make 'normal' things work. Thus, more chances of meeting one. I guess the hardest thing to find in Nigeria is a relatively poor, but still agnostic lady. Maybe one can find one from a well-to-do family. But from a poor family? It's like finding hair on Michael Jordan's head. True story!

On other news, I think the major reasons these girls stick to conventional christianity is so not to appear verrrry different from other normal, regular chics. Same reason they make their hair or attach some Brazilian weirdos to it, wear high heels if they can, not talk to a guy before he talks to them, etc. Records have shown that appearing too different does not make them achieve their 'man' goals.

e no easy oh oh oh, go back and reason wit ha. D devil u knw is beta dan d angel u dnt knw shikena

Now that it's on the front page, agnostic babes please make thyselves known to your future men

bolaino: Please I need your help, my girlfriend of about a month plus wants to leave me because I'm a freethinker, I love her, I've always loved her, but being a freethinker is the best thing that has happened to me, she is a God fearing christian with good morales and she's very beautiful and intelligent, but she says she can't get married or date an "unrepentant pagan" like me, (yeah her words exactly) what should I do? Should I let her go or should I compromise and throw away what I believe to be truth and embrace what I think is false, all because of love, I'm confused,

If she loves you, she will accept you with your "weakness". Love is - "In sickness and in health, in strength and in weakness".

If she cannot overlook your conviction about life, then you can be sure there are a lot more things she will have problems with when living with you.

I wouldnt say you should leave her, but i will tell you to wake up from dreamland of love, hold your stand, if she leaves, then look for another.

What truth re u loking f again when the girl is a christian, dont u think she will lead u to truth.

She should be happy,
I heard Freethinkers make the best forum owners.

Tot Ileke-idi / Yoruba Omoge is agnostic/athiest, una fit send application sha.

And Callotti too, though she is married but I don't know athiests view on Polyandry.

Una fit try una luck sha.

if you love her,kindly join her faith.
**she is giving you the best opportunity**

Oga you need to understand that Jesus Christ is the way the truth and the light.

its unfortunate but how long do you wish to live a life you think is a lie?, do something you dont believe in?. Give her time to tnink but dont be the one to call of the relationship since you dont mind. But on a side note, i advise you that if what you believe is true, then it is your responsibility to find the true God and the true way to serve God. Dont just sit and be a free thinker. There truely is a Maker that makes all things perfect.

bolaino: what I believe to be truth is that christianity like most religions is false, and has caused mankind more pain than gain, I'm not disputing that there is indeed the supernatural, but I don't believe that christianity has the answers it claims it does, and I don't believe in the biblical God,

You are responsible for your beliefs.

But the girl better drops the ''unrepentatnt pagan''.

Darkness and light have nothing in common. Better stick to her and start reading your bible and God will expose the truth to you like He did to Saul the persecutor of Christ.

bolaino: can't I try being a christian and see how it goes?

Why would you want to try out something you believe is false? Please let the poor girl be!

Mtchwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww z dat all what 2 do z as simple as a b c d

bolaino: Please I need your help, my girlfriend of about a month plus wants to leave me because I'm a freethinker, I love her, I've always loved her, but being a freethinker is the best thing that has happened to me, she is a God fearing christian with good morals and she's very beautiful and intelligent, but she says she can't get married or date an "unrepentant pagan" like me, (yeah her words exactly) what should I do? Should I let her go or should I compromise and throw away what I believe to be truth and embrace what I think is false, all because of love, I'm confused,

Don't ever compromise your beliefs for anything. Not even love because in the end you will never be happy. If you change to being a christian or whatever, you will be pretending to be what you are not and is she worth it? Will she do same for you? Ask her if she considers being a freethinker for you sake. If she says "No", then that's your go. It might hurt but you will find the one that accepts you for your beliefs. All the best.

bolaino: can't I try being a christian and see how it goes?

Steeu.p1d boy. U wan repent because of woman. Hahahaha...