davidylan:

If single motherhood is all you all crack it up to be then why are single mothers usually very desperate to marry and raise their kids in two-parent families? Perhaps they are just ignorant and sexist too?

I thoroughly deplore tactics like this... the use of inflammatory but baseless ad hominems to shut down debate when you have nothing else to say.

if you read my post, u will see that I do not say single motherhood is ideal. In fact, LOVING, GENUINE two parent home is ideal. yet this is not as common as we all pretend it is: see michelle obama video.

the fact that single mothers are persecuted by society is the point i'm making here. this persecution results because of the vulnerable position single mothers are in. it is usually the most vulnerable that are typically persecuted and blamed for ills.

in africa where they like to pride themselves in having "low divorce" rates, they persecute the women whose husbands have passed away. ie single widows. hence it is obvious that the hatred doesn't come out of concern for children but rather a sexist place that just hates women.

same way ppl like to make arguments on why mass black incaceration is a good thing. when the place that argument is coming from has racist elements to it rather than just solely a anti-crime perspective.

99cent: ok good for you. he was partially raised by his grand parents from age 10-16. sure u win.

anyway,
nothing wrong with loving two parent homes. it's ideal. but when we start persecuting single mothers or blaming them for societal ills. then how does that help? how is that different from what they do in africa where they scapegoat older female widows as "witches" usually the most vulnerable ppl being blamed for societal ills.

I'm not sure what your point is... but it is a well-known fact that the vast majority (more than 70%) of kids born to single mothers are more likely to remain in poverty or end up with criminal records. We're not exactly blaming them for the facts now are we?

I for one i'm also tired of single-mothers totting their kids everywhere while taking food stamps, free medicaid and social security to raise children that i did not sire. Those bills are paid for by those who chose to be responsible with their own resources. I have always said that the best way to break the epidemic of single-motherhood is to remove the safety net from off their feet.

99cent:

if you read my post, u will see that I do not say single motherhood is ideal. In fact, LOVING, GENUINE two parent home is ideal. yet this is not as common as we all pretend it is: see michelle obama video.

the fact that single mothers are persecuted by society is the point i'm making here. this persecution results because of the vulnerable position single mothers are in. it is usually the most vulnerable that are typically persecuted and blamed for ills.
in africa where they like to pride themselves in having "low divorce" rates, they persecute the women whose husbands have passed away. ie single widows. hence it is obvious that the hatred doesn't come out of concern for children but rather a sexist place that just hates women.

If you call this "persecution" then sign me up. I too would love to pop out kids and have government pay for their food, healthcare, clothes, daycare, schooling etc while i sit watching Oprah all day, using those same kids to claim undeserved tax credits... I can of course depend on a judge to make sure i have full custody of the kids even though i have zero means of taking care of them anyway.

davidylan:

I'm not sure what your point is... but it is a well-known fact that the vast majority (more than 70%) of kids born to single mothers are more likely to remain in poverty or end up with criminal records. We're not exactly blaming them for the facts now are we?

this is a chicken and egg question. are those women living in poverty because they are single mothers. or are they single because they are in poverty and black?

u will notice that majority of those women are also black. and you will also look at black males and find that compared to other races black males are more likely to be unemployed,in poverty and in jail. in fact, there are more black women in the labor force than black males! this kind statistic only applies to blacks!do you not think for any second that this contributes to the increase in single parenthood?

among whites, increasingly, the higher the income and education of a woman, the more likely she is to get married. also partially due to changing believes on part of white males who now esteem intelligence and education in finding a marriag partner. esp. in this recession where two parent income is almost necessity for living a comfortable middle class life.

99cent:

this is a chicken and egg question. are those women living in poverty because they are single mothers. or are they single because they are in poverty and black?

It is more simple than you think... they are living in poverty because they are single mothers. It is much harder to gain the education you need or move for the jobs that pay you what you need when you are tied down by children you cant support (some born at the age of 15) and unnecessary child custody battles.

99cent:
u will notice that majority of those women are also black. and you will also look at black males and find that compared to other races black males are more likely to be unemployed,in poverty and in jail. in fact, there are more black women in the labor force than black males! this kind statistic only applies to blacks!do you not think for any second that this contributes to the increase in single parenthood?

among whites, increasingly, the higher the income and education of a woman, the more likely she is to get married. also partially due to changing believes on part of white males who now esteem intelligence and education in finding a marriag partner. esp. in this recession where two parent income is almost necessity for living a comfortable middle class life.

If those black males are in jail it is because they committed a crime. If you went back to check, most of those black males came from single parent homes.

in the 40s and 50s, a woman's education would have worked against her in finding a marriage partner. in fact, many women had to choose between getting married and getting an advanced degree.
this is due to BELIEFS held by white males at the time about women's role in the household. since those sexist beliefs have largely eroded esp. among upper middle class, their marriage rates are going up!!
it is the lower class that are now having a hard time getting married and staying married.

davidylan:
If those black males are in jail it is because they committed a crime. If you went back to check, most of those black males came from single parent homes.

so whose fault is it? the single mother or the father who is probably a crack cocaine addict or criminal?
why does society place the blame on the single mother?

99cent: in the 40s and 50s, a woman's education would have worked against her in finding a marriage partner. in fact, many women had to choose between getting married and getting an advanced degree.
this is due to BELIEFS held by white males at the time about women's role in the household. since those sexist beliefs have largely eroded esp. among upper middle class, their marriage rates are going up!!
it is the lower class that are now having a hard time getting married and staying married.

perhaps because most are already totting 3 kids before they are 19 for 3 different fathers? I wont marry them too.

99cent:

so whose fault is it? the single mother or the father who is probably a crack cocaine addict or criminal?
why does society place the blame on the single mother?

Both. Didnt she know he was a crack addict before she spread her legs? What did she expect?

davidylan:
It is more simple than you think... they are living in poverty because they are single mothers. It is much harder to gain the education you need or move for the jobs that pay you what you need when you are tied down by children you cant support (some born at the age of 15) and unnecessary child custody battles.

ok good for you. and the black males living in poverty are there because of single mothers too I assume.
question then is, why do you not support abortion?
you would assume that mysoginists like you would support a mass campaign to sterilize poor blacks by now.
in fact, I actually support less fertility for blacks. I agree that if blacks are living in poverty, they should not be procreating as much. all men who have criminal records by age 16 should probably be sterilized.

davidylan:

perhaps because most are already totting 3 kids before they are 19 for 3 different fathers? I wont marry them too.

teenage pregnancies are actually at an all time low. yet poverty rates are high. even among two parent households.
last time I checked, finances was the #1 cause of divorce.
women are single usually because the men are unemployed and incapable of supporting in the household. have u ever thought of that?
until men start to recognize this fact (middle class white males have), then single parent households are only going to increase further.
if as a man, you can't provide financially for the family, then u should put ur ego aside and start cooking in the kitchen while your wife works. this is what is causing marriage rates to climb again among educated whites. gender roles have changed and couples work more as partners and support each other's strengths.

those women in the ghetto actually choose to be single mothers. the chance of them finding an employed black male in the ghetto who is not into drugs is almost 0. they have no option than be single parent or childless.

99cent: ok good for you. he was partially raised by his grand parents from age 10-16. sure u win.

anyway,
nothing wrong with loving two parent homes. it's ideal. but when we start persecuting single mothers or blaming them for societal ills. then how does that help? how is that different from what they do in africa where they scapegoat older female widows as "witches" usually the most vulnerable ppl being blamed for societal ills.

where do you people get off with these assertions
I know of women who lost their hubbies and no one called them witches

Dont bring archaic traditions of 40 years ago and make it like it still happens and is widespread

99cent:

ok good for you. and the black males living in poverty are there because of single mothers too I assume.
question then is, why do you not support abortion?
you would assume that mysoginists like you would support a mass campaign to sterilize poor blacks by now.
in fact, I actually support less fertility for blacks. I agree that if blacks are living in poverty, they should not be procreating as much. all men who have criminal records by age 16 should probably be sterilized.

That is a fact that majority of them come from broken homes. You can bury your head in the sand all you want.

Why do you call me a misogynist? I suppose others are not allowed to have an opinion other than yours?

biolabee:

where do you people get off with these assertions
I know of women who lost their hubbies and no one called them widows

Dont bring archaic traditions of 40 years ago and make it like it still happens and is widespread

a woman who lost her husband to death is a widow. LOL check you dictionary.
last time I checked, in Africa, it is usually widows and orphans who are most likely to be accused of witchcraft.
http://www.blackchristiannews.com/news/2013/04/christian-leaders-in-africa-seek-to-protect-widows-orphans-from-witchcraft-accusations.html

99cent:

teenage pregnancies are actually at an all time low. yet poverty rates are high. even among two parent households.
last time I checked, finances was the #1 cause of divorce.
women are single usually because the men are unemployed and incapable of supporting in the household. have u ever thought of that?
until men start to recognize this fact (middle class white males have), then single parent households are only going to increase further.
if as a man, you can't provide financially for the family, then u should put ur ego aside and start cooking in the kitchen while your wife works. this is what is causing marriage rates to climb again among educated whites. gender roles have changed and couples work more as partners and support each other's strengths.

those women in the ghetto actually choose to be single mothers. the chance of them finding an employed black male in the ghetto who is not into drugs is almost 0. they have no option than be single parent or childless.

I have... i also happen to know that many of those "single" women actually have kids from other men. why should anyone marry them and add another man's child to his headache?

99cent:

ok good for you. and the black males living in poverty are there because of single mothers too I assume.
question then is, why do you not support abortion?
you would assume that mysoginists like you would support a mass campaign to sterilize poor blacks by now.
in fact, I actually support less fertility for blacks. I agree that if blacks are living in poverty, they should not be procreating as much. all men who have criminal records by age 16 should probably be sterilized.

A logical argument and yet tou cannot resist the urge to abuse or insult
Is it innate? cant u behave otherwise

HAba!!

99cent:

a woman who lost her husband to death is a widow. LOL check you dictionary.
last time I checked, in Africa, it is usually widows and orphans who are most likely to be accused of witchcraft.
http://www.blackchristiannews.com/news/2013/04/christian-leaders-in-africa-seek-to-protect-widows-orphans-from-witchcraft-accusations.html

I meant witches... typos...

99cent:

a woman who lost her husband to death is a widow. LOL check you dictionary.
last time I checked, in Africa, it is usually widows and orphans who are most likely to be accused of witchcraft.
http://www.blackchristiannews.com/news/2013/04/christian-leaders-in-africa-seek-to-protect-widows-orphans-from-witchcraft-accusations.html

This is an extreme case and is not the norm in most parts of Africa. Bringing it up as a red herring really makes one scratch his head.

davidylan:
I suppose others are not allowed to have an opinion other than yours?

That's a woman for you. They just want to hear their opinion with your voice

[size=5pt]Hehehehe let the fire begin[/size]

davidylan:

This is an extreme case and is not the norm in most parts of Africa. Bringing it up as a red herring really makes one scratch his head.

Dont worry, you will soon hear FGM is widespread in africa...

HAHAHA

99cent:
those women in the ghetto actually choose to be single mothers. the chance of them finding an employed black male in the ghetto who is not into drugs is almost 0. they have no option than be single parent or childless.

Most of them didnt... they are mostly irresponsible girls from broken homes themselves who will spread their legs for any fool all in the name of "swag". They also know that they can use those kids as bargaining chips to obtain government services they dont deserve. Too bad their kids simply perpetuate the unfortunate cycle of irresponsibility.

davidylan:

That is a fact that majority of them come from broken homes. You can bury your head in the sand all you want.

Why do you call me a misogynist? I suppose others are not allowed to have an opinion other than yours?

well,they are disadvantaged in society no doubt. in fact, 2 parent household is an impossibility in black communities. the males are unemployed and criminals. unless you are arguing that women should start marrying criminals and wife beaters just so they can have a Mrs. title in front of their name.

if u hold misogynist opinions, u are a misogynist. abeg, don't make me laugh.

davidylan:

Most of them didnt... they are mostly irresponsible girls from broken homes themselves who will spread their legs for any fool all in the name of "swag". They also know that they can use those kids as bargaining chips to obtain government services they dont deserve. Too bad their kids simply perpetuate the unfortunate cycle of irresponsibility.

again, I will rather choose to be single than "marry" any criminal male from the ghetto.

davidylan:

Most of them didnt... they are mostly irresponsible girls from broken homes themselves who will spread their legs for any fool all in the name of "swag". They also know that they can use those kids as bargaining chips to obtain government services they dont deserve. Too bad their kids simply perpetuate the unfortunate cycle of irresponsibility.

In the UK, teens were having kids to obtain welfare benefits manipulating the system

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1210438/UK-teenage-girls-worst-drunks-world-despite-billions-spent-welfare.html

---

Yet there is precious little evidence that sex education reduces the number of teenage pregnancies. In fact, just the opposite could be the case. For authoritative research has found that the more sex education children receive in schools, the greater their involvement in early sexual activity.
Historically, of course, this is an obvious truth. Before sex education became a central part of the national curriculum in the modern era, rates of sexual activity were far lower among young people and teenage pregnancy was exceedingly rare.

Indeed, the current Government’s shrill emphasis on sex education is nothing more than a politically fashionable mantra. It has no basis in fact.
Contrary to what ministers might claim, the stubbornly high levels of teen parenthood are caused not by a lack of teaching or contraception, but by a host of other, more deep-rooted social issues.
One of the most significant factors behind Britain’s stubbornly high rate of teenage pregnancy is the accelerating breakdown of the family, which leaves children from broken homes without role models to teach them about the importance of love and commitment in relationships.

Ironically, this collapse of traditional family life has been fuelled by deliberate government policies, such as the end of tax relief for married couples and the introduction of financial incentives in the welfare system for lone parents.
For make no mistake: despite what the Government might think, being brought up in a stable, domestic environment is by far the best way a child can learn about the importance of fidelity, restraint and personal responsibility.


Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-1253631/BRENDA-ALMOND-Well-end-teenage-pregnancy-epidemic-admit-whats-REALLY-causing-it.html#ixzz2XdNJNzik

99cent:
you would assume that mysoginists like you would support a mass campaign to sterilize poor blacks by now.
in fact, I actually support less fertility for blacks. I agree that if blacks are living in poverty, they should not be procreating as much. all men who have criminal records by age 16 should probably be sterilized.

I wonder what feminists would say if a man suggests women are sterilized

99cent:

well,they are disadvantaged in society no doubt. in fact, 2 parent household is an impossibility in black communities. the males are unemployed and criminals. unless you are arguing that women should start marrying criminals and wife beaters just so they can have a Mrs. title in front of their name.

u think u are allowed to have misogynist opinion yet u wonder why anyone would call u misogynist? don't make me laugh.

I dont get your point. This is mine in a nutshell:

1. A 2-parent household in black communities is possible, i see them ALL the time.

2. Black single mothers are only "disadvantaged in society" BECAUSE they choose to. If you have a baby at 15 and end up dropping out of high school please blame yourself and not society. The same society you think puts you at a disadvantage is the only reason you can even survive with that child... you know our taxes and all.

3. single mothers who CANNOT financially support their kids should head to the nearest adoption center. It is SELFISH to keep a child you know you cannot provide a decent chance at life.

4. If you want to get married you will find someone... except of course you are more interested in ephemeral attributes like "swag", light skin and all...

5. Calling others names just because they dont agree with you makes you sound very immature.

biolabee:

In the UK, teens were having kids to obtain welfare benefits manipulating the system

We have the exact same problem here. As a single man, i pay maximum taxes with no chance of any tax breaks whatsoever. A single mom on the other hand gets tax credits per child up to 5 kids, day care credits, food stamps, free medicaid for each child up to the age of 2... and unless she earns well of $50,000... she pays virtually nothing in taxes and gets extra back.

Yeah they are disadvantaged indeed.

99cent:


again, I will rather choose to be single than "marry" any criminal male from the ghetto.

HAHa..so in your locale, all the males are ghetto


FYI you can actually do better
Maybe you need to move from where you are to hookup with more socially upward black males or white if you do ice.

99cent:


again, I will rather choose to be single than "marry" any criminal male from the ghetto.

There are plenty of good single black males... if you cant find them i can help.

davidylan:

We have the exact same problem here. As a single man, i pay maximum taxes with no chance of any tax breaks whatsoever. A single mom on the other hand gets tax credits per child up to 5 kids, day care credits, food stamps, free medicaid for each child up to the age of 2... and unless she earns well of $50,000... she pays virtually nothing in taxes and gets extra back.

Yeah they are disadvantaged indeed.

I feel you guys,,... im sure i will be be so pissed
Anytime i travel and see in the trains with buggies
Kids having kids/// tragic// hurray for feminism!!

I still dont get why they must resort to insults.....

toshmann:

I wonder what feminists would say if a man suggests women are sterilized

hahah what do you think feminists have been saying for hundreds of years?
bill gates has a mission to sterilize women all over the third world (esp. india) for being "poor"
it's all part of the Malthusian theory
even in israel, black women there were being sterilized.

again, the most vulnerable people in society are always blamed for all problems and target for harsh treatments.
that's why feminists fight to gain power in society.

trust me a single mother who is a CEO of a company cannot be touched. even if society thinks evil of her, they can't do anything to harm her.
where as, if she were vulnerable, she can be harmed and then the harm will be justified based on the opinion that she is the cause of all evils.

wonder why misogynist men like to say children are raised better in two parent households. yet they ever focus on the missing part of the story: the man. where is the man? what is he doing?
as if these misogynist men even care at all about children.
in fact, those single mothers could have chosen to put their kids in garbage and dumpsters. yet they sacrifice to raise these kids singlehandedly while the "father" is out somewhere absolved of all responsibility (if he is not paying child support). duh. it is obvious where majority of the blame should fall. isn't it?

biolabee:
HAHa..so in your locale, all the males are ghetto


FYI you can actually do better
Maybe you need to move from where you are to hookup with more socially upward balck males or white if you do ice.

I wonder. When i was in grad school we actually had no less than 4 single black male residents among our pool of friends. the girls were too busy dancing in seedy bars and clubs to notice.