Just awesome

African Client
________________________________________
The beautiful secretary of the president of a bank goes on a sight-seeing tour with a very rich African king who was a very important client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her, don't
reject the guy outright.

So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her. After a few minutes, the woman says to the man, "I will only marry you under three conditions. First, I want my engagement ring to be a 75-carat diamond ring with a matching 200-carat diamond tiara."

The African king pauses for awhile. Then, he nods his head and says, "No problem! I have. I have."

Realizing her first condition was too easy the woman says to the man, "I want you to build me a 100-room mansion in New York. As a vacation home, I want a chateau built in the middle of the best wine country in France."

The African king pauses for awhile. He whips out his cellular phone and calls some brokers in New York and in France. He looks at the woman, nods his head and says, "Okay, okay. I build. I build."

Realizing that she only has one last condition, the secretary knows that she'd better make this a good one. She takes her time to think and finally she gets an idea. A sure-to-work condition. She squints her eyes, looks at the man and says, rather coldly, "Since I like sex, I want the man I marry to have a 14-inch privates."

The man seems a bit disturbed. He cups his face with his hands and rests his elbows on the table, all the while muttering in African dialect.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, the king shakes his head, looking really sad, and says to the woman, "Okay, okay. I cut. I cut."

incredible

Thanks guys.

Welcome

gabby,

i no dey challenge you oh. Me i be veteran for here so no need.

Just wanna see if u can slaughter me with laughter.

So far, i can give you 90%

Welldone

hehehe

Mimee:

African Client
________________________________________
The beautiful secretary of the president of a bank goes on a sight-seeing tour with a very rich African king who was a very important client. The client out of the blue asks her to marry him. Naturally, the secretary is quite taken aback. However, she remembers what her boss told her, don't
reject the guy outright.

So, she tries to think of a way to dissuade the businessman from wanting to marry her. After a few minutes, the woman says to the man, "I will only marry you under three conditions. First, I want my engagement ring to be a 75-carat diamond ring with a matching 200-carat diamond tiara."

The African king pauses for awhile. Then, he nods his head and says, "No problem! I have. I have."

Realizing her first condition was too easy the woman says to the man, "I want you to build me a 100-room mansion in New York. As a vacation home, I want a chateau built in the middle of the best wine country in France."

The African king pauses for awhile. He whips out his cellular phone and calls some brokers in New York and in France. He looks at the woman, nods his head and says, "Okay, okay. I build. I build."

Realizing that she only has one last condition, the secretary knows that she'd better make this a good one. She takes her time to think and finally she gets an idea. A sure-to-work condition. She squints her eyes, looks at the man and says, rather coldly, "Since I like sex, I want the man I marry to have a 14-inch privates."

The man seems a bit disturbed. He cups his face with his hands and rests his elbows on the table, all the while muttering in African dialect.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, the king shakes his head, looking really sad, and says to the woman, "Okay, okay. I cut. I cut."

incredible

a guy kiss a girl and and a rice grain end up in his mouth

The girl ask "a bet you don't know what I cook today"

The guy said "rice"

The girl said "nah I cooked rice two days ago

oops, two days ago!

Hahah Cayon. Eww Disgusting gross, HAHA!

Hey ituen,
Nah, This is not a contest oh. Just sharing funny information. heheh!

dammmmmmmmmmmmmnnnnnnnnnnnn,
so so funny!!!

ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

@Gabri

Just fire down jare. Make i laugh

Wife has the last say,

A husband and his wife who have been married 20 years were doing some yard work. The man was working hard cleaning the BBQ grill while his wife was bending over, weeding flowers from the flower bed. So the man says to his wife "Your rear end is almost as wide as this grill" She ignores the remark.

A little later, the husband takes his measuring tape and measures the grill, then he goes over to his wife while she is bending over, measures her rear end and gasps, "Geez, it really IS as wide as the grill!" She ignores this remark as well.

Later that night while in bed, her husband starts to feel frisky. The wife calmly responds, "If you think I'm gonna fire up the grill for one little wiener, you are sadly mistaken."

What's it's Name?

This guy walks into a bar and two steps in, he realizes it's a gay bar. "But what the heck," he says, "I really want a drink."

When the gay waiter approaches, he says to the customer, "What's the name of your penis?"

The customer says, "Look, I'm not into any of that. All I want is a drink."

The gay waiter says, "I'm sorry but I can't serve you until you tell me the name of your penis. Mine for instance is called 'Nike,' for the slogan, 'Just Do It.' That guy down at the end of the bar calls his 'Snickers,' because 'It really Satisfies."

The customer looks dumbfounded so the bartender tells him he will give him a second to think it over. The customer asks the man sitting to his left, who is sipping on a beer, "Hey bud, what's the name of your penis?"

The man looks back and says with a smile, "TIMEX."

The thirsty customer asks, "Why Timex?"

The fella proudly replies, "Cause it takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin!"

A little shaken, the customer turns to the fella on his right, who is sipping a fruity Margarita and says, "So, what do you call your penis?"

The man turns to him and proudly exclaims, "FORD, because 'Quality is Job 1.' " Then he adds, "Have you driven a Ford, lately?"

Even more shaken, the customer has to think for a moment before he comes up with a name for his penis. Finally, he turns to the bartender and exclaims, "The name of my penis is 'Secret.' Now give me my beer."

The bartender begins to pour the customer a beer, but with a puzzled look asks, "Why secret?"

The customer says, "Because it's STRONG ENOUGH FOR A MAN, BUT MADE FOR A WOMAN!"

Nice. Hey gabrywyl have you seen this guy looking for you in one corner here?

Hey Krama,
No, I'm sorry I did not notice actually.

Wow! I'm flattered someone like my post though but did not see the guy in my thread. I think.

Heheh!

Thats cool. Remember to invite us for the naming ceremony!

Krama,
Uhm. . . Whats a naming ceremony?

I see that you have been answered on the other thread. So when you and the guy eventually get married and have a baby, you should kindly remember to invite us for the naming ceremony. Just kidding anyway

HAHA! Oh Goodness. . . . . Depends where the child is born. Because of the business which we are doing, we dont know if we will actually end up in Malaysia or Nigeria but as long as the business goes up, everything else will be fine.

You don't seem to get the joke here. I mean when you and THAT GUY looking for you on the other thread get married. . .

Thats a girl no? I think?

Dunno

Haha!

Thanks for the laugh

Rastaman Interview

Historian was interviewing a Rastafarian. The interview went like this:

Historian: It is said that 98% Rastaman suck pussy.

Rastafarian: Yow boss, yuh si me? Me pure. Mi nuh eat meat an' mi nuh eat flesh!!! Mi cum from Lords of Lords, Kings of Kings, to di most high, JAH RASTAFARI!!! I an' I nuh duh dem tings deh. Zeeeen.

Historian: It is said that the other 2% are batty men.

Rastafarian: Squeeze mi back inna di 98%.

Hahah! Cayon

I have one here:-

A Blonde Buys A Love Machine

One day this guy comes to work at a Love Machine shop. His boss leaves for the day and puts him in charge of the shop.

About an hour later a black haired lady comes in and asks "How much for your black dildos?"

The guy says "30 bucks"

"And how much for your white dildos?" asks the lady.

Again the man says "30 bucks for the black and 30 bucks for the white"

So she takes the black one and leaves.

A while later a brunette comes in to the store and asks "How much for your white dildos?"

The man responds "30 bucks"

She asks "And how much for your black dildos?"

"30 bucks for the white and 30 bucks for the black" replies the man.

So she takes the white one leaves.

About an hour later a blonde walks through the door and asks "How much are your dildos?"

The guys says "All our dildos are 30 bucks"

Then she looks up behind the man on a shelf and ask "How much for that plaid one?"

The man responds "Oh, that one is special. That will cost you $250"

The blonde agrees and takes it.

Later that day the boss come back and asks "So what did you sell today?"

The man says "I sold a black Love Machine, a white Love Machine , and your thermous flask for $250!"

OUCH!

Well don cayon and gabri

Thanks Ituen

Bring in somemore Cayon Sista! Make me laugh.

Iam making you laugh. . . oya open ya teeth like this

Krama. . . Naughty boy