Idowuogbo:
awww..

urs wont pass u bye my brother! stay strong!!

Vikin:

Eeyah!

biolabee:

s.exbot.. u attacked kulyie on the last thread on people buying food for dates and getting no view of pant and you are here again

which girl spent ur money mercilessly that u are picking on people here



sorry bro.. its all part of life,.,.. hope u come out a stronger person

sweetnigga: encourage marriage my friend.. U are not making any point.

sweetnigga: encourage marriage my friend.. U are not making any point.

yamunla: pele tie SAMABOY..next time don't put all ur eggs in one basket..

kulyie: but you are making a point,abi?oponu.where in my post did you see me discouraging marriage.try lati malo senses e na :p

Ihedinobi:

Prior to and/or larger than this particular thread?

Samabu07:
I would go off limit. Its safer I don't keep all eggs in different basket.

slimyem: What's this thread about again?
Kulyie?

DailyNews: Man has advanced in knowledge, technology, science, fashion, finance, research and what have you but failed more in marriages such that the number of failed marriages that took place between the year 2000 to 2013 are much more than the successful ones, and you know why?

Courtship and marriage have been westernised, academicalized, fashionized, financialized, technologicalized and in fact modernised!

We now read all books on how to treat a husband, what to discuss with him before you say yes I do, why you should marry him, when to know that he is serious, the qualities he must have to ensure he will be a wonderful husband, etc, etc before we make choice of spouse.

Our fathers and forefathers didn't read all these how to marry, how not to marry, what to discuss with him before marriage and why he won't make a good husband before they got married happily to our mothers and grandmothers...and they all married and lived happily.

Our problem today is: greed, selfishness, we are inconsiderate, and we had been over brainwashed by the western world who failed in marriages.

Ihedinobi:

Obviously, opposite does not necessarily mean incompatible. But what some critics here missed is that these two were not even looking to maximize the good things in their differences, rather they were stumbling all over and fighting over them. That alone meant thay neither was ready to be married.

The fact that the lady was more inclined to save and be smart with finances should have made her even more attractive and lovable by the man and the fact that the man was impulsive should have made him a breath of fresh air for her because what's the use of being so careful with your finances if you can't treat and reward yourself every now and then?

These two would have been compatible if they were really looking to get married not just to acquire a new status. So the argument against desperation still holds.



There is no such thing as spontaneity in choosing a mate. This is inexcusable, but that is not to say that it cannot and does not work. Every now and then a shot in the dark does hit its mark. That can never be read to mean that one should wait for the night to take a shot that is best taken when the sun is high and the eyes are sharp.

If I were the girl, I'd run. If I were the man, I'd hide my head in shame in some remote island for a year at least for pulling such an iddiotic stunt.

Now, it is very possible that because of strong experience one can tell in a very short time when they've found their mate, but that's only one side of the equation. What about the other guy or girl that you're proposing to or who should propose to you? Don't they deserve to make sure that they see what you see too?

I could meet the one I know I ought to be with for the rest of my life, but it would be very selfish of me to spring such a sudden decision on them before they've evaluated me and what being with me makes them.

So, here again, the argument against desperation stands.



And what is wrong with the above? I didn't hear any of our trigger-happy "proponents" (says who?) of marriage explain what is.



It doesn't mean you can't fall in love fast. It just means that you need to and should give your partner the chance to get to know you and how you fit. It's really a desperate person who digs their claws into their potential spouse like they're afraid they'll run from them.

And a desperate person is not looking to marry you particularly, they're not in love with you particularly. They're in love with being married and they'll marry a pole if it could put the ring on their finger.



Now why would anyone want to be on every dating site they know?



What human male has a real argument against this? When we men love, it's a war and we want to win and we'll use whatever works to win, but the guy who is fighting to win a woman he loves acts differently from the guy who's fighting to win a status he loves.

The guy after a woman who's got his heart is ssmart and kind. He takes his time to woo (note the nearly extinct word) her to him, that is, to attract her to him, to make himself a strongest option in her array of options. He works to encourage her to come to him of her own volition.

The guy after a ring and a status goes after the woman like a hound after rabbits. And hounds don't care for rabbits. They don't make a home for them and bring them food and warm them when they're cold etc, they kill them and not necessarily for food.

The true man will give gifts but he'll not hide behind them because he's confident not desperate and he's after a woman whom he believes has value and is aware of it and not desperate either.



It's too soon to meet the family when you haven't met me properly first. When we have got on the same page, then why in the world should we not run home to our parents to show who not what we've won for our efforts?



Where is this false?



Marriage is not a sign either that one's matured. It's a decision one makesin line with the purpose of their lives. I could be an adult, whivh is the same as saying that I'm mature, and still not be married. Marriage only counts with respect to the purpose of an individual's particular existence.

That said, social pressure does not define the purpose of any given person's life. That is defined by the Maker of the person. And when the Maker has defined it, it is the person's responsibility to make choices that align with that purspose.

tintingz:

tintingz: this is part of the thing that is killing our new age sisters about marriage...they waste their time reading marriage articles or break up stories in magazines and newspapers instead of seeking knowledge from people with experience.

Idowuogbo:
kai! rare gem! it is well..

Idowuogbo:
kai! rare gem! it is well..

promisengr:
Why does is lady alway poke nose into sumtin dat gat nutin to do with ha (i don dey here,u use ur reggae spoil anoda man blues)

kulyie: but you are making a point,abi?oponu.where in my post did you see me discouraging marriage.try lati malo senses e na :p

try69:

Can't say larger than the thread..it may sound demeaning to ur deductions..they exists separately but are Relative in this context.

promisengr:
Why does is lady alway poke nose into sumtin dat gat nutin to do with ha (i don dey here,u use ur reggae spoil anoda man blues)

biolabee:

s.exbot.. u attacked kulyie on the last thread on people buying food for dates and getting no view of pant and you are here again

which girl spent ur money mercilessly that u are picking on people here

LabourParty:

What if he finally gets a good job and decides to go for a much more younger lady to marry?

jennykadry: Story 2.

I know women who have met men that are not interested in courtship but marriage. Some of these marriages fail, the others are success stories. My eldest sister met her husband and he wanted marriage, no time for 10 years courtship. I did say it once on this forum that a sane and smart man knows if a woman is a a wife material after spending a few hours with her.

Fussbot: get ur facts right man,I wasn't on dat thread..watin be my own wit her?mtsheew

And me picking on people?av I picked on u b4(u be beans)?abi u sabi my username 4 dis NL?I only attack dos who attack me

And lastly broda biola,u tink we don't know u 2?the one dat supports her on every thread?

Fussbot:
1stly,if u no point out my gbagauns den u are a transgendered!

2ndly,I was well brought up than to be swearing @ sm1 that didn't offend me,in other words it means I didn't promise 2 swear @you..promise?i posted something,you called yoursef a cow and I warned you by swearing @ you and I said you could get more if u swear back(which luckily 4 you,you havn't)

3rdly,I wise pass u so I kno sae even if I swear 4 u 2nit in no go pain u cus u are well prepared 4 it...bt u sha don know naw sha sae I no gbadun..

And lastly about joystick....hmmmm..u want 2 know if I have a joystick??2 dat I'l say no1 in your family can withstand my joystick....oko to badt to long to tunwa fe!u wana confirm??bring all d gals in ur family...meeeee!

Ihedinobi:

It takes nothing away from my deductions here to say that the history and the context that you refer to are bigger than this thread alone. I can understand that.

The issue here is simple: they disagreed with kulyie as a matter of principle if it is true that they were responding to their history with her rather than the particular questions of principle on this thread. And that is rather unintelligent and counter-productive.

It only means that if kulyie should agree that something white is white indeed, they would, as amatter of principle, disagree that it is white regardless the fact that it is actually white only because she agrees that it is white.

tomakint:
I want you you got gut and class this is what makes a lady unique! I mean it cuty

tomakint:
I want you you got gut and class this is what makes a lady unique! I mean it cuty

biolabee:

dude.. dont turn it on me.. i made error on the wrong thread..see the correct thread

u harassing kulyie again



na today?

kulyie: lmao

some peeps are just fond of making sick insinuations

yamunla: no be small tin bros,thank God NL is a faceless forum..dey for no gang up abuse her,na beating she for collect.."Kulyie is entitled to her opinion abeg oo"..