I want to keep a boyfriend, mummy
I want to keep a boyfriend who I can stay over the night with, without you having to worry about my safety

I want to be able to use the home phoneline as I want!
I want to be able to throw parties in the house with my friends
I donot want to be grounded again just because I was reported to you for talking to a guy
I donot want you dropping me off at school anymore
I wanna have my male friends come over to visit
I donot want this "its past your bedtime" scolds nomore
I wana be free to go any where I want
I donot want the seizing of my phone cos I did something wrong anymore
I donot want the monitoring anymore, please
I want you to trust me enough to takecare of myself when you are out of town

I promise to be a very good girl and won't let you down if you give me some breathing space, mum
Above all, I wanna be free to call my dad anytime I want and I want you to go back to him With all my heart, I wanna feel like a normal teen. I'm no kid please

Nairalanders, please help me beg my mum. I wanna show her this thread by the time she gets back to town. Thanks

Mum, your daughter is a grown lady, treat her like one!!!!

talk to her about abstinence and safe se.x and trust her to make the right choice.
Wats dat she wrote about "past bed time"?? i know u love her so much but plssss she is not in kindergarten
You want a daughter dat ll make u proud? treat her lyk ur friend, lyk the young adult she is.... and d fact that it didn't workout bw u and d dad doesn't mean he wont make a good father pls FGS don't let ur emotions get in the way of ur daughter's happiness

mum, listen to your daughter.

I thought you are 23 already?

You could have a one-on-one convo with your mom concerning your concerns. You mom seems to be the over-protective type.

Awwwh....
Honest truth is...some of those things u wana do, could hurt you.
Well, i wont blame ur mum for watching out for you...cause the world is a very risky place, bt i think mummy should give u d chance to make ur own mistakes so u can learn frm them.... she cant alwys protect u forever!
Bt just incase u get ur freedom, dont abuse it! So many pple out there might not make d mistakes they made today if someone actually cared so much abt whom nd who they hang/ed out with nd if they were really disciplined!
I can see u care more abt the opposite sex...well, its a normal thing...bt be very careful!

Mummy pls give her the freedom to whatever pleases her so she can understand d reason why u ve been protecting her all this while...if u dont, she might think u dont love her.
Talkn about ur father....please let her connect with her Dad while he is still alive....no one knows tomorrow.

How old are u ?

@OP, it's quite simple really...

Mummy's home, mummy's rules - until you move out...

For starters, maybe you should get a job, earn your own money, stop living under her roof, rent your apartment and pay your bills and when you get pregnant, find the solution yourself then you're free to do what you like.

Hummmm maybe u not ready for such dear...
U can't do all that under her roof..
Get a place to stay a job or something,then ul b free as a bird

XoXo 19 year old INDEPENDANT nadia...

nadia_SA: Hummmm maybe u not ready for such dear...
U can't do all that under her roof..
Get a place to stay a job or something,then ul b free as a bird

XoXo 19 year old INDEPENDANT nadia...

Nadia, you're 19?? I suspected so. Nice leather jacket by the way and those protruding somethings

You are not serious!

You want to throw a party in your parents home?

Bring in small small players to come smooch your body in your mother's house??

I say again, you're not serious!


Let me tell you, young girl.. with this kind of desperation you have, you'll only end up with prematured pregnancy of an unknown father...

You can be independent without keeping boyfriends.. In other words, boyfriends doesn't make you independent...

I'm sure your mom knows the difference between players & real men.. May be you are yet to introduce/bring home the idea man... May be you've been introducing pim. ps! Saggy-baggy-doppy kids who would only engage and disengage your body... turn you to a club-party-rafia material...

My advice is; make friends...not boyfriends.. start with friends... I'm sure you'll meet the right one!

Btw, how far have you gone in your career?

I have sisters, cousins who were partially "caged" like you, but they never complained..
Today, they are all married.... except for the younger ones in school.

About your Dad, I understand how you feel... Its a matter of time (Trust me)
The reconciliation is near!

OMG!
If you are truly around 23 years old and your mum is still protecting you like this as if you are around 6 years old, then, one or more of these problems are involved.
Its either..........
1. She has not done what shes is supposed to have done as a mother, in the area of good upbringing, if she had done that rightly, she will have that trust and confidence in you that you will live by the morals she had imparted into you while growing up.
Or
2. She had given you the opportunity once and you misused/abused it by being heady or stubborn or wayward as a result of too much freedom, hence, her restrictions and overprotection.
Or
3. She was given too much freedom while she was a young adult and she abused it, in such a way that she ended up in a crossroad of life, which is not what she wanted in life, and of which shes afraid that if she gives you the same freedom, you may end up being like her.
Or
4. She has seen those signs of gross immaturity from you and shes afraid that you can be easily manipulated or used if she gives you the freedom you are asking for.


Anyway, since that is what you want, i will appeal to your mum to give you the freedom you desire and allow you to grow up, if you make mistake, you will learn from it, its called "primary experience" and its from this type of experience that makes an adult an adult.
And to you, my dearie, endeavour not to misuse/abuse the freedom when given.
All in all, if she insist, be rest assured that, she cant shield you forever, be patient with her, never be rude with her and when you are ready for marriage and you go, you are free forever.
I pray to God to give you the wisdom to go about everything rightly and timely.
Shalom.

Efemena_xy: @OP, it's quite simple really...

Mummy's home, mummy's rules - until you move out...

where have you been since
Miss ya!

Omo, see life problems. LOL. ok o. Mummy's baby, what can we do? Talk to your mummy or what. Maybe you show her this thread. She so worked hard on you that these are your main life struggles and worries.

nadia_SA: Hummmm maybe u not ready for such dear...
U can't do all that under her roof..
Get a place to stay a job or something,then ul b free as a bird

XoXo 19 year old INDEPENDANT nadia...

I'm feeling you there.

gree-die:
Mum, your daughter is a grown lady, treat her like one!!!!

talk to her about abstinence and safe se.x and trust her to make the right choice.
Wats dat she wrote about "past bed time"?? i know u love her so much but plssss she is not in kindergarten
You want a daughter dat ll make u proud? treat her lyk ur friend, lyk the young adult she is.... and d fact that it didn't workout bw u and d dad doesn't mean he wont make a good father pls FGS don't let ur emotions get in the way of ur daughter's happiness

mum, listen to your daughter.

Thank you, gree-die. Its getting really tough for me in this house, part of what made me stay off NL for so long. I'm suffocating in my own house, its horrible

greatgod2012:


where have you been since
Miss ya!

My sister, I dey o! Been sweating it out at the grinding stone called Nine-to-five six, my dear.

I'm good though. Missed you too! How are you and yours?

Efemena_xy:

My sister, I dey o! Been sweating it out at the grinding stone called Nine-to-five six, my dear.

I'm good though. Missed you too! How are you and yours?

we are fine and im particularly happy reading your posts. Welcome ma.

dayokanu: I thought you are 23 already?

if she's 23 and she does not act like one then her mum would lord over her. parents have to be convinced you are old. i know they don't always want to accept but the child should not relent!

by 17, i had my independence.....

dayokanu: I thought you are 23 already?

Yes, I am.

CFCfan: You could have a one-on-one convo with your mom concerning your concerns. You mom seems to be the over-protective type.

I have talked and talked, even we sometimes have fights over it. I'm tired honestly. I feel like running away

you are a normal teen. you have a lifetime to experience all these things when you are old enough to leave mummy's nest. Thank God mummy's doing here best to keep you safe and you should appreciate that. I pray mummy makes up with daddy for your sake.

Acidosis: You are not serious!

You want to throw a party in your parents home?

Bring in small small players to come smooch your body in your mother's house??

I say again, you're not serious!


Let me tell you, young girl.. with this kind of desperation you have, you'll only end up with prematured pregnancy of an unknown father...

You can be independent without keeping boyfriends.. In other words, boyfriends doesn't make you independent...

I'm sure your mom knows the difference between players & real men.. May be you are yet to introduce/bring home the idea man... May be you've been introducing pim. ps! Saggy-baggy-doppy kids who would only engage and disengage your body... turn you to a club-party-rafia material...

My advice is; make friends...not boyfriends.. start with friends... I'm sure you'll meet the right one!

Btw, how far have you gone in your career?

I have sisters, cousins who were partially "caged" like you, but they never complained..
Today, they are all married.... except for the younger ones in school.

About your Dad, I understand how you feel... Its a matter of time (Trust me)
The reconciliation is near!

on point!

Infact i think givn Teens or youths in their early twenties all d freedom to do whatever they like should b shunned at! There should be restrictions.
As for me, i dont invite my male frds to my house neither do i hang out with them in their various houses as well...we go somewhr public! Not because am scared of anythn, bt because there is somethn called 'self-respect'
you might not understand or appreciate whatever she is doing for u now, bt trust me.....u will soon! When u r older.

piero2u: you are a normal teen. you have a lifetime to experience all these things when you are old enough to leave mummy's nest. Thank God mummy's doing here best to keep you safe and you should appreciate that. I pray mummy makes up with daddy for your sake.

She is 23.

staicey:
I have talked and talked, even we sometimes have fights over it. I'm tired honestly. I feel like running away

Running away won't be the best option. Like others have said, maybe getting a job could do the trick.

Very soon, you will get married and wish u had stayed a little more with your mum.

But wait sef! Ur mama sabi over-protect oo.

CFCfan:

She is 23.

yea we know.

Efemena_xy: @OP, it's quite simple really...

Mummy's home, mummy's rules - until you move out...

Noooooo how do I cope with the outside world when am so restricted at this age?

staicey:


Noooooo how do I cope with the outside world when am so restricted at this age?

What makes you think you won't be able to cope?

I mean what aspect of living independently on your own, on the outside, do you think would be difficult for you? Exercising restraint / caution? Footing your own bills? Taking responsibility for your actions and living with the consequences of the decision(s) you make?

Not intending to put you down or anything of that sort, only just trying to understand your perspective - because from what I've read so far, you're 23 years old, yes?

Acidosis: You are not serious!

You want to throw a party in your parents home?

Bring in small small players to come smooch your body in your mother's house??

I say again, you're not serious!


Let me tell you, young girl.. with this kind of desperation you have, you'll only end up with prematured pregnancy of an unknown father...

You can be independent without keeping boyfriends.. In other words, boyfriends doesn't make you independent...

I'm sure your mom knows the difference between players & real men.. May be you are yet to introduce/bring home the idea man... May be you've been introducing pim. ps! Saggy-baggy-doppy kids who would only engage and disengage your body... turn you to a club-party-rafia material...

My advice is; make friends...not boyfriends.. start with friends... I'm sure you'll meet the right one!

Btw, how far have you gone in your career?

I have sisters, cousins who were partially "caged" like you, but they never complained..
Today, they are all married.... except for the younger ones in school.

About your Dad, I understand how you feel... Its a matter of time (Trust me)
The reconciliation is near!

Thank you acid. I'm 23 incase you didn't notice and am sure you know that a lady at 23 or even 20 can differentiate good from bad. All I need is a breathinhg space, seizing my phone, making sure I'm sleeping after I've gone to bed.. Hell! Sometimes she don't allow me go to bed with my phone. She always wnts to go through my texts at every slight opportunity, what's that?

Besides, I don't wanna believe you are saying me having a bf at 23 is bad. Is it not better I have a bf who comes over to the house and she kknows him? Than have one I sneak out to see all the time?

staicey:

Thank you acid. I'm 23 incase you didn't notice and am sure you know that a lady at 23 or even 20 can differentiate good from bad. All I need is a breathinhg space, seizing my phone, making sure I'm sleeping after I've gone to bed.. Hell! Sometimes she don't allow me go to bed with my phone. She always wnts to go through my texts at every slight opportunity, what's that?

Besides, I don't wanna believe you are saying me having a bf at 23 is bad. Is it not better I have a bf who comes over to the house and she kknows him? Than have one I sneak out to see all the time?

This is very serious

I'll go crazy if I was in that predicament. At that stage, I would have to bring extended family members into the conversation.

staicey:
I have talked and talked, even we sometimes have fights over it. I'm tired honestly. I feel like running away

pls, dont run away, dont stain the pure record you have had, if shes adamant and insistent, endure for a while more, you will get married and be free forever.
May God help you.