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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / What If Your Lover/partner Slaps Your Mother? (652 Views)
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What If Your Lover/partner Slaps Your Mother? by namis007: 10:58pm On Sep 07, 2013 |
Some people live in self denial that the above situation or scenario can never happen but they are wrong because as far as we are dealing with we humans and our relationships with each other, nothing is absolutely impossible and we are wrong to think that the situation can never arise. Situations that are worse have been recorded and will continue to be recorded daily given that our inter-relationships are based on our understandings of how we view situations at a given time in most cases. Given the daily stress levels we encounter as we go about and relate with each other, it may not be impossible that some people would have developed “short fuses” and they need only a little push to blow up. Why in God’s name would my partner stoop so low as to be arguing with my mother to the extent of slapping her is a common question and reaction that the average person that this question is asked would ask and hold on to? Some would even go as far as saying that it can never happen because each person has a particular role and there are limitations to those roles that each person fills and acts within. I’ve even heard a lot of people assume that this occurrence can only happen among illiterates and uncultured people but the truth is that we all have different stress levels to work with especially in a society like ours where we get stressed everyday due to the nature of the different lifestyles we find ourselves in. I wouldn’t want to bore you with too much gossips but the truth is that I’ve witnessed this occurrence severally with different people in the nature of my existence as a man who is observant of situations happening within his surroundings and I must tell you that it’s a really ugly experience. In all the situations that I witnessed where this occurrence happened, none of the relationships did last beyond the particular incident. In fact that was what led to the separation of the families for those people till today. And for what it’s worth, in this part of the world, in-laws are very important and mothers-in-law are sacrosanct. They are the little demigods that just have to be worshipped or at least pampered if one wants to have a serious and successful relationship with one’s partner. For me, this occurrence boils down to incompetence, lack of tolerance, ineptitude in handling issues relating to mutual civility and the list goes on from herein. Lack of tolerance on the part of the mother-in-law to relate with the partner, ineptitude in handling issues relating to mutual civility by the partner and incompetence of the person who’s partner slapped the mother not being able to manage properly little issues that may have been coming up initially long before the slapping incidence and which may have led to the incidence happening. I personally do not succumb to violence in any form and because of this I will have to severally reprimand my mother for stooping so low as to allow an argument degenerate to the extent where my partner would have to slap her. She must learn to be dignified against all affronts from my partner and inform me of such. She has to respect my judgement on dealing with the situations that may come to my notice without questioning my motives on why certain things may be done in a certain way. This is not to say that I’m in support of what my partner did. On the contrary, she has committed a sacrilege to me which is tantamount to slapping me too because if she ever respected me as her partner, she would have exercised patience on the side of caution. Therefore for all these reasons, the relationship is definitely over between us. She cannot be trusted not to go as far as poisoning my mother and or me at the slightest provocation. A woman who can’t control her anger to the point of violence cannot be trusted with my life. As a man I cannot cut any woman such slack. It is not about who is right or wrong. Tough call! Marriage counselors always say that the key problems in relationships, especially marriage, are money, sex, communication and in-laws. This is very true. When we talk about in-laws in marital problems, mothers- in-law top the chart for many reasons. The truth is that not all mothers-in-law are troublesome; in fact, most times, it is the mindset of the couple that creates the problems. Most people expect their partners’ mothers to cause problems in their relationships and guess what? You get what you expect! Imagine that your partner is upset about something and there is a heated argument either between you and your partner in your mother’s presence, or between your partner and your mother in your presence, then suddenly, your partner gives your mother a hot slap! Gbam!!! I can hear you say God forbid”! These things happen and such things have wrecked relationships. Except your partner is in the habit of slapping his own mother and other elders, and your mum just happens to be the next victim, this is a had one to swallow. Wise people know that if someone wants to have a good relationship with his/ her partner, he/she should be ready to love or at least be civil to the partner’s family and friends. It does not make sense to say you love someone and want to remain bonded to the person if you are not ready to have a healthy relationship with her family members, no matter how unpleasant you think they may be. Also, our culture, and even common sense, demands a level of respect for elders, especially our own parents and parents of our partners. This is why I cannot comprehend any reason why a man should slap his partner’s mother, no matter the provocation. Unfortunately, the person who will be in the most awkward spot is the child of the woman who was slapped, especially if she is in a “till-deathdo- us-part situation”. In my opinion, a woman can only think about how to react in such a situation if she is married to the man. If the man is not her husband, then she should thank God for the ‘escape opportunity’ and flee! A man that can slap your mother when he is just one leg in, can kill her when he marries you! Men usually exercise extra caution when they are still trying to obtain the lifetime license, so just know that whatever he dishes out during dating and courtship is just a tip of the iceberg – a tiny fraction of the whole package which will be opened during marriage. Now, when it is your husband that has slapped your dear mother during a heated argument, you are definitely in hot soup because both of them will be looking straight at you to see whose side you take. Believe me, I cannot imagine any middle ground in this kind of situation. In fact, I do not know how I would react. However, silence seems to be some kind of ‘first aid’. Just do not say anything. You can just cry and pray to God because only He can give you the right answer. In fact, this is a good time to pray that such a situation never occurs because that kind of slap can be likened to a bullet in your heart. So, what should you do if your partner slaps your mother during a heated argument? It is a really tough call!! |
Re: What If Your Lover/partner Slaps Your Mother? by Enegod(m): 11:17pm On Sep 07, 2013 |
holy shīt!! |
Re: What If Your Lover/partner Slaps Your Mother? by awesomebenji(m): 1:26am On Sep 08, 2013 |
Tomuch write up...didnt read a line sef. In response 2d topic, if she ever try dat...dts her last, she wont ever have those hands 2 raise again. Lmao |
Re: What If Your Lover/partner Slaps Your Mother? by Mynd44: 3:43am On Sep 08, 2013 |
The last time I checked, assault is still a crime |
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