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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Religion / Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. (39552 Views)
Christians Engaging In Premarital Sexual Relations Before Marriage, Is It Okay? / What Are The Spiritual Effects Of Premarital Sex? / Premarital Sex Is Not A Sin Against God (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Nobody: 3:24pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Acidosis: Oga, why didn't Jesus crucify the adulterous woman? 3 Likes |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by obayaya(m): 3:24pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
you all are getting this wrong. in the sacrament of holy matrimony, the pastor/minister is just a witness to their vows. he has no right whatsoever to renegade on his Promise to be a witness. let's forget all these plenty church business strategies.. the pastor is wrong. very wrong. these two decided to make this solemn vows despite their past. who's Mr. pastor to condemn them. @Op, find another minister to bear witness to your friends vows. 3 Likes |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by nora544: 3:25pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Donmichaelz: See these Fool quotin scriptures,did dey tell u d girl was carrying baby jesus?stop using awkward examples to give illustations....If you sleep with a Girl b4 marriage its a Sin,I am still a virgin and proud of It,I guese you guys wount understand wat the bible ment by keeping the bed holy until marriage 95% of you have had SE.X every now and den,dats why when you see the truth you try to cover it..SMH sorry you are brainwashed from your pastor. what is with a widow she cannot marry in the church because she is no virgin, you are realy stupid. what is with the pastors who marry a second time, because they have divorce her first wife is this okay. So you are a person who has not sined in her life, sorry but you can be a virgin, but i can tell you if you will have a good married life that stand on an other paper. 2 Likes |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Acidosis(m): 3:26pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
IYA NGBALI: keep decieving yourself as if all the marriages done in churches were without pre marital sex. The guy should bone the so called church,do traditional and go to registry and continue to hammer his wife jare you think ALL churches be like COZA abi? The OP didnt say Pastor cancelled the wedding because the lady isn't a virgin.. Wedding was cancelled because girl (probably a choir member) and the dude dey do the thing while Pastor was busy praying for marriage and counselling them (Courtship)... If I were a Pastor in that position, I'd be f00lish not to suspend such HOLY matrimony 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by IYANGBALI: 3:28pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
ritux: if we are honest, let's take statistic of all the single persons that have commented on this thread.no mind us,we are all thieves,na the person wey we catch be the scapegoat. I fok well well before I marry and wen I marry finish I still dey fok for outside,I no go decieve God,ayam not a saint. 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by troy20(m): 3:28pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
dont u all tire of ur hypocritical lives.alota ppl eagerly strotting pius garbs pointing due north.i could swear dt pastor has had sexual union b4 he even got married...bt hey! fvck my comment anyway cause i kno some self anointed general maximus of God would quote some counter verse 4rm d bible n spear me 2 death.u all defending ur pastors could do well 4 urselvs by having an identity n ur own perspective of God.they r no more human than u r.would God realy say since u had sexual union b4 marriage, i wunt accept ur marriage.would he? It sounds so human n cheap.WOULD A SUPER BEING LIKE GOD THINK LIKE THAT?. |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Decency75: 3:29pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
There is no place in the bible that said you should not peruse your wife after paying her bride price. These are just doctrine that the church is using to guide themselves. It is not compulsory that you do church wedding, the only wedding authorized in the bible is the traditional wedding and that is where Christ performed his first miracle. Can the pastor confirm that he married his wife a virgin. The couple is 100% right to have sex once traditional rites are performed. 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by IYANGBALI: 3:30pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Acidosis:abeg make we hear word,una too dey form holy holy for naija church and na una worse pass for the whole world 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Nobody: 3:30pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Donmichaelz: See these Fool quotin scriptures,did dey tell u d girl was carrying baby jesus?stop using awkward examples to give illustations....If you sleep with a Girl b4 marriage its a Sin,I am still a virgin and proud of It,I guese you guys wount understand wat the bible ment by keeping the bed holy until marriage 95% of you have had SE.X every now and den,dats why when you see the truth you try to cover it..SMH Dude, you are in dire need of some education. Your survival so far must be a miracle. |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Donmichaelz(m): 3:32pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
nora544:FOOlll are we talking about widows here,if you don't have anything to say go and help your mother sell pure water so you could have N100 for 10MB, I don't want to argue with pauper like you,If brain was for sale I would av gathered all my Money and Buy 1 for You....(\/)oRo/\/ 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by nora544: 3:36pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Donmichaelz: FOOlll are we talking about widows here,if you don't have anything to say go and help your mother sell pure water so you could have N100 for 10MB, I don't want to argue with pauper like you,If brain was for sale I would av gathered all my Money and Buy 1 for You....(\/)oRo/\/ I know what i say and it is the truth, but the toime will come. When you read what i write than she say only a vergin could marry in the church, sorry and this is not tru. |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by ifefemi(m): 3:38pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
HYPOCRITES!!! We deceive ourselves so much, as if pre-marital sex is the ONLY sin. God forgive me, but we never can tell the kind of person the same Pastor is. I personally have had the most of bad experiences bordering on integrity from christians/church members (including Pastor). Abeg make them go do their marriage in the court jare; God bless their union. 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by obayaya(m): 3:39pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
only God knows what Christianity in Nigeria is turning into. I have heard of a scenario where a pastor asked someone that wanna marry a sister in his church how much he has in his account. his reasons being that no good father will leave his daughter to suffer. that's the reality of Christianity in Nigeria. hypocrisy 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by pxjosh(m): 3:39pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Raymondenyi: Mek dem dey dia dey mumu demselves, what nonsense, is dat d only church on earth! C'mon dey should change d venue! N send bulk sms to as much persons as dey can!!! Informing dem of d change in venue!!! Nonsensebro calm down. Ure shouting too much. Reduce ur voice, nd stop abusing exclamation marks 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by PastorKun(m): 3:46pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
In the first instance the pastor had no business poking his nose into their personal affairs and inquiring if they had been having pre marital sex. His own is to preach to them and not to pronounce judgment. As the good Lord said; "let he who is without sin cast the first stone." 4 Likes |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Wolef7(m): 3:48pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
nora544: Nigerian Pastors make me laugh, one buy a husband for her daughter that she didnot has a child without a husband, the other pastor tell that they cannot marry in the church, and the next pastor will test if she realy is a virginSorry dude, did you write that in English? |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Biggyd2: 3:48pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Beats me why people still insist on playing mr or mrs god. So what if the couple admitted to telling lies,watching porn movies, stealing, engaging in 'holy gossip', back stabbing etc, before getting married, did the pastor over look those but picked on the sex before marriage part? Which sin Is greater than the other? What if you insist that they conduct repentance and they pretend to do so and get wedded by the pastor? How can you tell the heart of man? Why won't the pastor just tell them the implications of what they did and leave the decision they take thereafter between them and God? And if people hear this in church, how many proposed couple will come out after now to tell the pastor that they committed such sin. From many of the posts here, we can see how judgemental people can be in this country while at the same time carrying their own baggages of sin which they haven't cleared with God. Na wa o! 3 Likes |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by sangybabe(f): 3:49pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
In my church, before the marriage counseling start the chairman marriage committee need to find out if the couple had premarital sex. These findings will help them to counsel the couple, they will be ask to pray for forgiveness and repent from the sin. They are warn never to have sex again till they are married. In the case of the op's friend am sure they had sex during the period of marriage counseling which is very wrong and attract disciplinary measures. In my church you are not suppose to fix any date till the marriage committee are sure that the couple adhere to the church guidelines. Before the counseling commence the couple are to do comprehensive blood test, if their both genetype is AS the counseling will be base on that direction still. A day to your wedding Pregnancy test will be conducted on the lady. God help you if the result is positive. The girl in question knows the type of church she attend. She wud've abide by their rules 3-4 months without sex to someone you know you have plenty of time to be with won't kill. |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by MARKREN: 3:51pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Guy Speak. You have said nothing. Challenge my statements with a "little logic". quote author=deols] quite a number. yes Try a mosque because of people like you lie [/quote] |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Emy4luv(m): 3:57pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Were they told that on their pre-marriage course or is it that he want to destroy their marriage? |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by princesschloe: 3:58pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
they would be married in a court or village square. not on the altar of God period! 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by deebrain(m): 3:58pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
You did not state if you have already done the traditional marriage. If you have already done some kind of commitment ceremony {trad or court etc} depending on how you have been raised by your church {if they frown at sex before church marriage under any way, then you messed up O! you have sinned against your church DOCTRINE and RULING PRINCIPLES AND NOT AGAINST GOD!}, you can do it in another church or organize an event with an ordained pastor to join you two. THE "IT MUST BE WITH THE POMP OF A BIG CHURCH SERVICE-LIKE CEREMONY" IS MERE RELIGION. thank you. |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Nobody: 4:06pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
When this kind of thing happened in my local deeper life church, the pastor did call off the wedding i mean the ceremony did not hold again but the man was told to carry his wife home. Guests had already sat down before the revelation was made public. They only confessed a day to the wedding. |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by mathskill: 4:09pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
. 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Decency75: 4:11pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
kennygee: Some churches and pastors don't care anymore, they have thrown away the standard of the bible, Some churches will even join a pregnant bride. In my church you have to do an intensive marriage counselling befor you can even fix a date. the counselling will determine if you both are on the same page and ready for marriage. issues like premarital sex will come up if you have done it, your counselling period will be extended to deal with the issue, issues like finance, sex and other important matter in marriage will be discussed. After your Marriage counselling, a date can be set. Few days to the wedding, the bride will go for a pregnancy test in a hospital selected by the church, her husband to be and her will also go for blood tests for genotype, blood group and h.i.v. If the woman turns up pregnant, the wedding will be turned into a marriage blessing. please pre-marital sex is when you have not done the traditional and gotten blessing from both parents or it representative. let us all stop fooling ourselves. However, church marriage is not compulsory when you have done traditional and court. it is just a glamour. 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Michyeddy(f): 4:12pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Acidosis: These days, I've learnt not to argue carelessly on Nairaland...you've won my heart......this is just on point 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by AsiwajuSamuel(m): 4:12pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
andymofia: Dear all, I have a friend whose wedding was billed for Saturday, September 21, 2013, but his pastor on interviewing the bride, discovered that they have had premarital sex and cancelled the wedding. Now the young man is confused and do not know what to do. I just hope he doesn't do something nasty. what do you advise?. Na by force to do church wedding? 1 Like |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by Nobody: 4:13pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
fluid26:you should be nominated for a merit award and given a sub machine gun to go hunt down the preacher. |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by LewsTherin: 4:14pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Like Deols said, what is bad is bad. Calling the pastor a hypocrite does not remove from the face that the couple did the wrong thing. Saying we should not judge is just a means of passing off responsibility and accountability. Demanding forgiveness from the pastor for the couple does not mean the erring couple should not be disciplined according to the tenets of the congregation they joined and agreed to follow. What pains me the most are the statements of not judging and because everyone does it then it's ok. It is not. And the Bible expects christians to hold each other accountable more so as their actions impact on the wider faith. Besides, where did the pastor say the couple will never be married in his church? Cancelling or postponing is required for the couple to reflect soberly on their mistakes and seed forgiveness FROM GOD. When that is done, the wedding can commence. Allowing them to just brush it aside in the name of "forgiving and not judging" only creates an environment where the couple think they have nothing to repent from. No matter what the bulk of Nairalanders believe, pre-marital sex is seen as sin before God. No amount of rationalizing will change that. 5 Likes |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by toluene12: 4:15pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
Actually what we call holy soleminization is just a funfair ceremony. Payment of bride price in the presence of both family members is the marriage. The court wedding handles official documentations and other related matters. The date on ur marriage certificate is ur legal wedding date. So, if u've done the above 2, u are already married b4 man, society and God. U dont need any pastor joining u again. However, i understand ur desire to have a church wedding. We all do. But, most churches are having stricter rules concerning marriage union in the face of gross abuse of priviledges limited to marriage in our society. It really has nothing to do with the bible since God instructs couples that engage in premarital intimacy to get married(exodus 22:16), paul also admonished people with uncontrollable burning desire to get married. There4 the decision by the couple to get married is laudable and should be applauded by all. However, a situation where 9 month old pregnant lady walks down the aisle or co habiting couples desiring church union is an insult on the very foundation the church was established and a bad precept to follow. More over the church leads the moral crusade against fornication and there4 should set the principles. Most churches will tell u its not compulsory u get married in the church, but if u desire then respect their rules on moral grounds and not necessary biblical. |
Re: Pastor Cancelled My Friend's Wedding Because Of Premarital Sex. by unmask: 4:16pm On Sep 18, 2013 |
they should go to pastor biodun of coza..... And I have said the only solution to fornication is to treat fornicators as homosexuals or worse.... Send them to jail or better yet stone them to death.....fornicators can single handedly cause God to destroy the world 1 Like |
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