chineloSA:

I understand the guys point of view. Is he married to you or you married to him You giving your son a Yoruba name should just be plain negotiations and him being a nice guy.

I ask if you are pregnant because, from my perspective I think you overreacted. In my culture, that is not negotiated, especially if you are married. So, i expect you to understand such.

kendraloops:

Are u kidding me? He has a right to deny me giving MY child a yoruba name All the labour pains n agony nko? Abeg foget oo. I know he's more of Esan than yoruba but it hurts. In public when people ask for his baby's yoruba name, he quickly responds that he's gat none.


As for me being pregnant again, I'm not oooo. Lol. Y u dey ask sef?

penny01502: we don't want more APC to dominate our land. stop yoruba, stop APC from dominating our south south region now!

chineloSA:

Teach his child his own. While injecting a little Yoruba.

Make him feel that his is important. . Show interest in his language yourself.

If you resist he will persist and more fights. You don't want that do you

kendraloops:
I was actually forced to marry him at gunpoint. [size=18pt]Didirin![/size]

deols: He is disgustingly feeling inferior.


I wonder why he went for a 'superior' ethnic group for a wife if he could not accept their ways.

How could allowing her child bear a Yoruba name have been a problem?

Man is very insecure.

chineloSA:

Teach his child his own. While injecting a little Yoruba.

Make him feel that his is important. . Show interest in his language yourself.

If you resist he will persist and more fights. You don't want that do you

ananwune:
aя̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ Y♡Ʊ married? I seriously doubt it.
@op, I believe every woman wants peace in her ђøm£, if Y♡Ʊ follow the advice of these amatuer femminist on nairaland then ϔ☺ΰr marriage is doomed. Irrespective of what anybody may tell Y♡Ʊ in this thread,ϔ☺ΰя̩̥̊ son is Esan,YOU have also become an esan woman by marriage. Y♡Ʊ may not know it but Y♡Ʊ aя̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ highly disadvantaged by not ardently learning the esan language yourself, Ђø̲̣̣w do Y♡Ʊ feel when Y♡Ʊ get to ϔ☺ΰя̩̥̊ hubby's hometown ånd just mope around cos Y♡Ʊ don't understand a thing they say? Ånd now Y♡Ʊ want ϔ☺ΰя̩̥̊ child to be in same shoes as Y♡Ʊ aя̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥? If I were to be married to a different tribe,I would first try very hard to learn M̶̲̥̅γ̲̣ hubby's language ånd then insist that M̶̲̥̅γ̲̣̣̥ kids learn it as well. They don't ИƐƐD ϔ☺ΰя̩̥̊ language,if they eventually learn it then it is a plus but they ИƐƐD to learn their father's tongue,they ИƐƐD it. ϔ☺ΰя̩̥̊ hubby would be very embarrased when he takes his kids to visit his hometown ånd they can't speak his language rather they speak their mother's language! His people ωιℓℓ term him a fool ånd ωιℓℓ dislike you Fø̲̣̣я̅ that cos they ωιℓℓ lay the blame on YOU, then ϔ☺ΰя̩̥̊ hubby would have a re-think on why he didn't marry from his tribe in the 1st place ånd may consider marrying a lady from his tribe. All these issues could be avoided by a simple act,try very hard to learn his language ånd make sure Y♡Ʊ both teach ϔ☺ΰя̩̥ kids his language first. Just M̶̲̥̅γ̲̣̣̥ opinion!

Ånd just because Y♡Ʊ added a yourba name to your son's name doesn't make it his known name. He should be known ånd addressed by his Esan name. He is a male child ånd therefore should identify with his father's culture, I believe it is in the best interest of the child. (It may be painful to you but sorry,truth hurts)

Duke_Nija:

Wrong!! My brothers and I, even cousins were born and bred in Lagos, we don't speak Yoruba. Anyway, these are part of the challenges of inter-ethnic marriages. Its just safest to marry from your tribe irrespective of what people think. I won't use my marriage to unite Nigeria abeg. Let Jonah and Co do that!!

kendraloops:
To me, it'll be an added advantage to the child.

Hubby says he's scared of baby developing funny yoruba accent as a result of speaking the language of which I've assured him such will never happen lailai.

chineloSA:
I am a self proclaimed feminists, but I am against woman turning man into their wives

A woman is married to a man and therefore takes after his surname, so man should not be deprived of that last right that is left for them please.

Yes we are equals, but he paid the bride price, provided shelter and name to be used for that house. So please, this is Africa.

Feminist

BarryX: Feminist

kendraloops:

Pls who's Hezron? Anyone I know?

Tunmi: The father should speak the language to the son then.

Wifey should just pipe down, dont speak Yoruba to your son in his presence and remind him to ALWAYS speak "Esan" to both fo you anytime he speaks to you or his son.

Sooner than later, he will get fed-up with his over-exaggeration of this his God-given paternal bravado!

lastpage:


SIMPLE SOLUTION!

The wife is Yoruba, she does not speak Esan language but Yoruba, so how can she teach a child, a language she herself does not speak?

This Esan husband forming "gra-gra' should take it upon himself to teach his son, his language.....

....instead of threatening his wife and shifting responsibility to her.

Wifey should just pipe down, dont speak Yoruba to your son in his presence and remind him to ALWAYS speak "Esan" to both fo you anytime he speaks to you or his son.

Sooner than later, he will get fed-up with his over-exaggeration of this his God-given paternal bravado!

Lastpage!

matnx: Are you really serious? A woman has no right to her child? All these man made customs!!! You should read about different cultures of the world since obviously are really shortsighted and naive. He has no right to deny her of giving her son a yoruba name! Her son is both Esan and yoruba by the way. In the future he will fit in perfectly if he knows both languages. The child can choose any of his inherited custom in the future will it kill him later if he decides to be identified later on in life as a yoruba man for some reason let's say politically?
In fact i just find your comment really disturbing and ridiculous!!

GSKing: I didn't know some people still live in the 20th century!!!

Afam4eva:
Some of you think marriage is a place where you go to claim right.

kendraloops: I'm so so so very angry this evening. I've been having this issue with hubby for a while now, used to think he was kidding but this evening just confirmed it for me.

I'm Yoruba n he's Esan from Edo state. He speaks yoruba very very fluently even better than me, he teaches me proverbs n all sometimes sef. But anytime I speak yoruba to our baby, he gets irritated kind of n says' my son is an Esan man, stop speaking yoruba to him'.

We had a major row over it this evening again. Don't I count in the boy's life? What's the biggie in him learning how to speak yoruba?

gothrones:
Isn't that what you have been doing all along? You claimed that the man is the head. You talked about marital roles. You have been advocating for the man's rights in almost all your comments; but heavens forbid that a woman have her own rights. The child has a first and last name given by the father; but if the mother wants to give the child a middle name, then she is "claiming rights." The child must speak the father's language, but if the mother wants the child to speak her own language too, then she is "claiming rights." I detest how women's rights in Nigeria do not matter.

Are u kidding me? He has a right to deny me giving MY child a yoruba name All the labour pains n agony nko? Abeg foget oo. I know he's more of Esan than yoruba but it hurts. In public when people ask for his baby's yoruba name, he quickly responds that he's gat none.

deols: He is disgustingly feeling inferior.


I wonder why he went for a 'superior' ethnic group for a wife if he could not accept their ways.

How could allowing her child bear a Yoruba name have been a problem?

Man is very insecure.

chinjo: Obedience is better than sacrifice