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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! (34402 Views)
"My Husband Uses ‘Aboniki’ Balm As Lubricant" – Woman Files For Divorce / Dearest Nigerians, People Are Suffering.. Read This! / Marital Infidelity, Divorce, And The Untold Story Of Nigerians Abroad (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Nobody: 6:25am On Jan 05, 2014 |
bigx:Help me ask her o! Will the "Nigerian woman" want to part with her own money? |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by bee444: 3:15pm On Jan 05, 2014 |
Women will continue to suffer abuse in the hands of Nigerian men since the men knows they would lose nothing if the woman decides to leave or divorce them. 2 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by coogar: 10:13pm On Jan 05, 2014 |
paris10: As in the norms in Nigeria, women who get divorced or are been thrown out of their matrimonial homes by their husbands tend to lose out alot. you are a complete idïot! even when a woman is promiscuous, she should be rewarded for her promiscuity? you should return any certificate you might have acquired in the last 20 years - you surely don't deserve them. 24 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by slimyem: 10:56pm On Jan 05, 2014 |
coogar: 8 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Nobody: 9:30am On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10:You are deluded to the nth degree. Let us know when you get back to reality. 4 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Nobody: 9:36am On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10: Nigerian men have a responsibility; emotionally, financially and psychologically to make sure their women dont go on to have post-divorce syndrome with the symptoms of self-pity, complex and confidence.You apparently live in Sweden. First of all, it is totally legal to have as many wives as one wants in Nigeria (note the word legal), so when the man's assets are split down the middle what happens to the other wives and children, say a man with four wives? It would be common sense on the part of any woman divorcing to plan her exit very well. Nigeria doesn't encourage marriage-exit wealth, we are not in Sweden. 1 Like |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Nobody: 9:39am On Jan 06, 2014 |
dlima: @op this is a fantastic post. It is really worth thinking about . I have always looked on with concern at women who through no fault of theirs are kicked out of their homes and are left to wither in the wind. It occured to me that aside from women who really are career motivated the reason most women will never agree to bé housewives is because in the event of a divorce they will be left with nothing, even after the emotional investment and support.There are laws, that work, in Nigeria about handling divorce and adequate financial settlements. However, no Nigerian court will collect the husband's house and handover to the wife while he squats about, we are not in Sweden. |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Nobody: 9:45am On Jan 06, 2014 |
bee444: Only women who go through divorce with no fault of their own should be compensated dearly by their husbands. Men who throw their wives out just to marry another woman should be ashamed of themselves and should be held accountable for irresponsibility.Your head is correct. |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Nobody: 7:56pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
I think we should be more concerned with getting the men to pay child support and pay it regularly. In a lot of divorces where the mother has custody of the kids the men hardly contribute for the upkeep of the kids and the ones who do so do it irregularly. The cost if upkeep for the kids should be shared by both parents even when they are divorced. Most single mothers in Nigeria are solely responsible for school fees and all other things kids need and this is a major reason why some women won't even leave an abusive marriage , the fear of how they'll be able to cater for the kids alone. 4 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by phuckNL: 8:17pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
Amelian: If the story abt the female engineering student selling okrika is true, then she's a D.U.M.B.O... She shudnt av bn trained thru university in d first place.. Except if she's a single mum wit kids, then her plight and decision is understable, but married? And doing such!... That's d height of it, abeg!No big deal in being an engineering student (Nigerian one) jare. 90% of them cant tell you the significance of the laws of thermodynamics barely TWO days after graduation so all they have is a piece of paper showing they went to school. She's probably better off selling the okrika. The fact that one studied engineering in a Nigerian university does not qualify one to be an engineer. 6 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Nobody: 8:22pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
phuck_NL: Gawd!! 2 Likes
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Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by omusiliyu(m): 8:23pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
Senate will move a motion to cross-check it. NO MORE DIVORCE AGAIN. UNDER RAIN AND SUN, FOR BAD AND GOOD. 1 Like |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Boss13: 8:27pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
bukatyne: @OP: Beautifully written. I just don't get the OP. She is immature to the realities of life and has seen so many western movies. 2 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by jmoore(m): 8:30pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10: ...Even in cases where the woman is found to be promiscuous and the husband want out, adequate measure should be put in place to make sure she share from the spoils...... You spoiled the whole stuff with the statement above. A prostitute deserves no compensation. 2 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by vanstanzy(m): 8:30pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
Trottle: op was making sense to me too until she got to the part u just quoted. I blame the Mods that posted this DISGRACE on the frontpage. SMH! |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by helpee(m): 8:35pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
@Op, i av to control my emotions not to insult you. You mean that if my wife cheats on me, the court should still collect my properties and hand it over to the promiscous wife so she can go and spend it on her new boyfriend. I will commit murder and face the music b4 that will happen. Why must you copy every stupid culture you see abroad? Have u forgotten that nigeria has a large muslim population and did Quaran not give muslims the right to marry 4 wives...so how will the husband split the spoil after divource? Always think before u adopt any stupid oyinbo culture 1 Like |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by dayokanu(m): 8:36pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
The only thing I support is the Child Support payment God has endowed everyone with a brain Divorce settlement should ONLY be in cases where the couple are running a joint business venture and all income or liabilities incurred after the wedding should be split based on contribution The only other case is where the husband mandates the wife to stay at home then he would have to pay her based on what her colleagues with same skillset are earning in their workplace 8 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by plaetton: 8:40pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
davidylan:I was about to say the same, and also ask why a man's wealth is to be considered spoils. Also, why are women always appearing blameless in the eyes of fellow women in cases of marital breakdown? It is usually women that sue for divorce. Men don't just wake up and shove their wives away without a heart wrenching story. 3 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Ijobaorun(m): 8:44pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
Is there any of them in her matrimonial home? They are single mother and they have money so they can't feel anytin. lady gogo: i sometimes wonder what all those female legislators do with their time in the National Assembly. 1 Like |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by SagePius: 8:54pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
In as much as I would like to support this prescription. I think this prescription must be given with cautions. If what obtains in America and other places where spouses were privilege to claim alimony and share in the richer person's estate is allowed in Nigeria, you will find lots of one weeks old marriages. People will be getting into marriage for cash. And two, it will encourage divorce causing more havoc in this already complicated world. What we need now is a law that will make it more difficult for spouses to think of divorce. It's destroyed so many kids, the world is heading towards a social disaster if the epidemic of divorce goes on unchecked. God bless Nigeria. Peace! 4 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Naijamericana: 8:58pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10: As in the norms in Nigeria, women who get divorced or are been thrown out of their matrimonial homes by their husbands tend to lose out alot. What is this, a joke? |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Naijamericana: 8:59pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10: My friend shutup! |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Walexsammy(m): 9:01pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10: As in the norms in Nigeria, women who get divorced or are been thrown out of their matrimonial homes by their husbands tend to lose out alot....u were making a lot of sense untill 'even in the cases of where the woman is found to be PROMISCOUS and the husband want out', nw tell me if such thing happened to ur brother or uncle, would u still allow him to share his spoils with the woman?, moreova if the reverse were to be the case, would urself share ur spoils with the man?, ladies itz high time u star making ur own money, cuz once the man sees the potentials in u and the fact ure nt even practically depending on him, he wouldn't even think of a divorce....Gracias |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Snoggy(m): 9:02pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10:This post reeks of total ignorance. . . The dumbest post I've read so far. Pfffffft! 2 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Naijamericana: 9:04pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10: Nigerian men have a responsibility; emotionally, financially and psychologically to make sure their women dont go on to have post-divorce syndrome with the symptoms of self-pity, complex and confidence. Now I see you are a comedian |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by debsite: 9:06pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
If given the opportunity of divorce compensation, some nigerian ladies will see it as a business opportunity and abuse it like most western girls with zero tolerance are doing right now.Even after cheating on their partners and being caught, they will use this weapon of compensation to get themselves acquited. Though some nigerian men are very bad and can abuse every opportunity to any length by changing women like clothes. So, it only the women that are not guilty that should be given the compensation not the abusers. 1 Like |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Walexsammy(m): 9:10pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
debsite: If given the opportunity of divorce compensation, some nigerian ladies will see it as a business opportunity and abuse it like most western girls with zero tolerance are doing right now.Even after cheating on their partners and being caught, they will use this weapon of compensation to get themselves acquited.well said bro |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Negation: 9:11pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
Haha, mods. - any chance of putting this in the Jokes section? At least half of it... No one can deny that Nigerian women go through a lot. And there probably should be situations where the courts should come in to ensure that the women who are truly suffering unfairly should be taken care of. But you've allowed your emotions to carry you away from the direction of logic. First you say even if the woman commits adultery she should "share from the spoils". And then you add further down, "You married her promising you would take care of her." I don't really know how vows go, but surely the wife promised to be faithful as well - maybe that can be grounds for voided vows (Don't remember the last time I heard vows go into who takes care of who financially, but cool)? Then you add to a commenter’s response, "Who cares if she earns more!" So what is this about then? Religion? Sexism? Wanting to 'win' at all costs? If the lady earns more 1.) What logical explanation could there be for the man to give her money?? Is she still suffering while being richer than her husband? 2.) If the woman who earns more divorces her husband, does he get some of her cash too? See, things work better when you are more understanding of both sides and not self-centred. Trying to ensure women benefit no matter what goes on in the marriage will ensure that women will be on one side and men on the other in this fight against the injustices of marriage. What the courts should be doing is making sure no one can leave a marriage for silly reasons (Sorry, this won’t cover adultery) without being penalised financially or in other ways. 2 Likes |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by http(m): 9:12pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
@ OP, do you think devorce na Friendly Match where both parties play for fun? divorce na serious atomic assault where both parties are willing to eliminate each other. Abeg talk another thing... Divorce is always nasty and it's a battle of no return between the man and woman. FYI, the man must have tried to finish the woman, physically, mentally while the woman must have tried all mean to send the man to meet his ancestor. I don't belive in settlement after divorce, all i can vote for is child support. 1 Like |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Nobody: 9:12pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
paris10: As in the norms in Nigeria, women who get divorced or are been thrown out of their matrimonial homes by their husbands tend to lose out alot.What we should be focusing on is avoiding and stopping divorce and not planning on how to compensate the woman....at least, I have a late brother....he died 2 yrs ago...and as I type, his wife is in total possession of all his properties, investment, insurance, etc...no single family member interfered, it was even the court and government that insisted that there must be an LA to manage his business and things so the wife doesn't squander it before their children grow up...yet, no one had interest... The wife is the manager, CEO, MD of everything and everyone is happy.....same way, not all men leave their wife empty handed when they part ways...just like most Nigerian women will paint to the whole world that Nigerian families (especially Igbo families) do snatch away everything from a woman when her husband dies...all lies from the pit of hell as fabricated and painted by nonsense NOLLYWOOD movies that has destroyed the entire image of Nigeria.... So stop painting Nigerian men evil and think on how to stop and avoid divorce and quit thinking about how much you will be given when you cheat and get divorced by your husband! 1 Like |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by inosend: 9:15pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
@Op It is very obvious that the intention here is to whip up sympathy for the womenfolks. Why should I be culpable for a crime I didn't commit? I had hoped you would be objective by positing a non-lopsided argument. I should pay for my wife's promiscuity-that is a laugh. 1 Like |
Re: Divorce And The Suffering Of The Nigerian Women! by Pamcrest(f): 9:20pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
Divorce is usually a bitter experience and d woman tends to lose out as d op opined. I think we need to educate our women about being financially independent even if married. Many women tend to depend majorly on their hubby even for d littlest of things. Woman pls try n save money as much as u can if u are employed. If u are not, save from d money he gives u....don't blow everything on vanities....save for a rainy day. We pray for an enduring marriage but poo happens! It may not be divorce, it may even be d death of d husband, so what then happens, esp with d family hawks hovering around to pounce on d man's property. Woman, be wise! My humble submission 5 Likes |
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