hgg

You a lesbo?
There's a 'F' beside your moniker.

@ poster
I think the problem is you,you obviously dnt make her happy,see if u can talk things out with her and try to pay more attention and show more affection towards her It might just do the trick.

this is emotional -cheating

am sure if the bobo your wife was emailing to was around, she would have physically cheated on you

sad! sad! .you guys can still patch things up, be more affectionate towards her( abeg don't hit her anymore)

but can you fully trust her anymore?

if you still love her and want her give her another chance

gff

well i dont think she really does love the other guy,
just some old feeling of the past caught up with her at a wrong time. ( when ur rela sufferd a blow)
niways its gonna be hard to forget this one,
cos i have learnt with women (xspecialy cheating ones) that when they say am sorry, they mean next time i will be very careful not to be caught.

This is your bed that you made now you have to lay in it.

You should be grateful that she is still with you after you put your hands on her.  What would be your advice to your mother if you found out a man hit her?  Would you tell your mother that she must have done something to provoke it or tell her to turn the other cheek.

Your wife stayed with you despite/inspite of the fact that you put your hands on her and now you find emails that she shared with someone who reached out to her and was there for her emotionally when you were/are not.

You should seek counseling.  Women are emotional beings and we NEED to feel that emotional connection from our men.  If that piece is missing we will find it some place else.  Once you loose her emotionally then you will loose her forever.  You have time to save your marriage but you must deal with your demons and release them so that you can give all of yourself to your wife.

Act now and act fast.

ajani27:

Thanks shegirl71. To be honest I have sinse changed a lot of things in the way we relate, there has been loads of improvement but I still find it difficult to tell her I love her (to be honest I don't know) or she telling me she loves me without me thinking back to six weeks back when she was clearly in love with some else. I cannot help but feel in any case that even though she said it was just how she felt at that particular time, I cannot trust her to be around this same guy without me. This other guy simply would think I'm a mug,  " he must be thinking his wife is in love with me ".
I am going insane, not happy and feels like I have no choice than to accept that this is history even though it lingers at the back of my mind every time. Like I said we have a beautiful child and that probably is the only reason why i'm still carrying on,
Help !!

then this too shall pass!

stay with her and  make it work , its not a perfect marriage  even from the onset.

ghhg

Thats what happens when you marry someone who doesent love you or who you dont love.

You wife's in love with another man v

I'd ask her to make her choice. Who does she want?? You or him

I'd advise you to also take a hard look at yourself. You said in the beginning it was good. What happened? Where did you falter?? Someone is not doing something right; you need to find out who and sort things out.

But this is life dear, s**t happens!!!

ajani27:

Thanks shegirl71. To be honest I have sinse changed a lot of things in the way we relate, there has been loads of improvement but I still find it difficult to tell her I love her (to be honest I don't know) or she telling me she loves me without me thinking back to six weeks back when she was clearly in love with some else. I cannot help but feel in any case that even though she said it was just how she felt at that particular time, I cannot trust her to be around this same guy without me. This other guy simply would think I'm a mug, " he must be thinking his wife is in love with me ".
I am going insane, not happy and feels like I have no choice than to accept that this is history even though it lingers at the back of my mind every time. Like I said we have a beautiful child and that probably is the only reason why i'm still carrying on,
Help !!

I think the best thing to do is to involve your parents, U knw maybe you guys shud table it in front of your parents they are better and matured in things like this.They will knw wat to do and hw to help u guys out.

You say you don't know if you love, her, when did that change? When she started getting close to another man emotionally? Or when you hit her? I don't understand. Your love for her was n ever true if it dissapears like that. I really believe that you all can benefit from a marriage counselor.

Your marriage prolly wasn't based on love in the first place, one reason it was easy for her to change at the slightest provocation.
Did you marry her because she got pregnant? If yes, mistake #1.
Do you think she'll stop having feelings for this guy now that you've caught her in the act? No, she'll only be more discreet.
She may not even be in love with this other guy, he prolly has more money.
She's trying to eat her cake and have it bro, she'll dump you if the guy is willing to take her.
You said you hit her because she slapped you. Only weaklings hit their women, try to avoid it in future.

Bottom line is: Wounds like this don't heal easily, you may need professional help if you really want things to be alright.