The self-wise but foolish man.
On a fateful day, a man was strolling down a road with an empty stomach.
Suddenly, he saw a restaurant with a board that says "come on in, ur grand-father settled ur bills 4 years ago", even though he knew his grand-father died 10 years ago,he entered and sat down, ordered for food and drinks, after he was done and was getting set to leave, the waitress gave him a bill, suprisingly he told the waitress that he thought his grand-father has paid.
The waitress replied and said 'yes', now you have to pay down for your grand-children.

A LYING LIAR.
One day, two friends were arguing about their dogs.
1st man:my dog is xo smart dat when the paper man cums every morning, she takes the paper wit ha mouth and brings it to me.
2nd man: I know.
1st man: how?
2nd man: my dog told me.

WORK GENESIS

In the beginning was the Plan. And then came the Assumptions. And the Assumptions were without form. And the Plan was without substance.
And darkness was upon the face of the Workers. And they spoke among themselves, saying, ''It is a crock of sh*t, and it stinketh.''
And the Workers went unto their Supervisors and said, ''It is a pail of dung, and none may abide the odor thereof.''
And the Supervisors went unto their Managers, saying, ''It is a container of excrement, and it is very strong, such that none may abide it.''
And the Managers went unto their Directors, saying, ''It is a vessel of fertilizer, and none may abide its strength.''
And the Directors spoke amongst themselves, saying to one another, ''It contains that which aids plant growth, and it is very strong.''
And the Directors went unto the Vice Presidents, saying unto them, ''It promotes growth, and it is very powerful.''
And the Vice Presidents went unto the President, saying unto him, ''This new plan will actively promote the growth and vigor of the company, with powerful effects.''
And the President looked upon the Plan, and saw that it was good.
And the Plan became Policy.
This is how Sh*t Happens.

THE TROUBLE WITH ELEPHANT D**K
Where is an elephant's sex organ?
In his feet - if he steps on you you're bleeped.

SHARP IGBO MAN

An Edo Man invited his friends for his mother's burial.

After lowering the coffin, the family put yam, rice, meat etc, into the grave in line with tradition. An Hausa man asked why. The Edo man smiled & said, "According to our tradition, the dead go on a long journey and need all the food items they can get."

The Hausa man dropped N100,000 inside and said, "When the food finish, buy more."

The Yoruba man dropped N50,000 and said, "Add this incase it's not enough."

The Igbo man smiled and brought out his cheque book and wrote a cheque of N200,000, dropped it in the coffin and took the N150,000 notes as a change, then said, "Nwanne, withdraw when you reach dia o... It is going to be a dangerous journey, we don't know how many robbers are out there and afterall we are in a cashless economy na! Travel well o!"