Damest09,Ikamefa,

Damest09:

@mrmayor
Can we have another great story, if it not a trouble?

I would like to write another story but I can't think of any title/idea right now,if any member is interested we could write a chain story.Its where one member starts a story and other contributing members take the story in a different direction,it creates a lot of suspense.Seun,Damsal,Ikamefa,Damest09 and other writers are welcomed to join this experiment.

@ mayor thats a cool idea though , but if i write rubbish oh when its ma turn to write make una no talk oh

Story building games don't work so well.

We already have the following story games:
www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-2904.0.html
www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-5174.0.html
www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-6266.0.html

WOW!!! one of the best stories i've read on this forum dang mr. mayor you are such a great writer. i read the whole thing and it was worth reading i was actually in this boring class while i was reading it and u made my stay in class very exciting, thanks man and good luck in the future if u decide to pursue this cuzz u are really good at it.

well done mrmayor of canterbury,
i enjoyed the story thoroughly. i've always been a sucker for happy endings.

but my brother, the sex scene was rather too raw, it could have done with some refining and fine tuning. abi, no be so?
nevertheless, me i gbadun the story weller.

Bagoma,

I understand where you are coming from,you would prefer if I wrote "they made love all night long"the problem is some people would still find it too raw.
I like saying it as it is,I present sex as it should be,explicit as it comes.In describing a sex scene its important to give the reader a ring side seat,make the reader understand how two consenting adults explored each other.

I made the fight scene between Esther and Iya Sikira as realistic as possible and it would be unfair to make leave the sex scene to the imagination.Just saying they made love doesn't say they enjoyed it or described how they felt after "making love".

Thanks for your comments,

Cheers

@ mrmayor

I find every bits of the story interesting and as for me personally, i wouldn't want you to change a bit of the story.

make the reader understand how two consenting adults explored each other

den den, mrmayor is producing pr0n for us!

Seun:

den den, mrmayor is producing pr0n for us!

yes oh na real!  pr0n       olodo

oh mr mayor, i wouldnt want you to just say they made love all night long, no way that is just too simple.
i wish i had time to give you an example of what i mean but never mind i promise to post a very juicy lovemaking scene soonest.
well done again for the story, good job for an amateur.
again i say i enjoyed it.
cheers.

Bagoma,

I can't wait for your comments,I really need helpful suggestions to write better stories.

Thanking you in advance

Cheers

mrmayor
to say ur story is nice is an understatement its da bomb
keep it up ple who knows one day u will be on ur way to hollywood

mrmayor, y didn't u finish the story? i was actually looking forward to the end of it , pls, try and make it available, ican't wait anymore, is like waiting for one of this nigerians movies that has part 2, i think u'll make a very good script writer, u really have the talent, do something about it before it waste away and you should put this in VHS and VCD im sure is gonna sell very well.
nice one

@ mrmayor, ur story is really da bomb unless we Nairans wouldn't be praising u this way. It's pure honesty. I enjoyed ur story because from the beginning u knew how to capture your readers attention. It was a fabulous piece of writing. I write too, but never have online and i just wanna drop one tip that's if i'm not going off line. :
1.
use puntuation marks when writing daialogues. It creates more space and makes it easier for reader to read faster and understand the characters' tone(if they're asking a question, commanding someone or else (it surely makes it enjoying for me). Anyway, that's whoosh, because we're africans and we feel u so there really is no need to make it perfect,(except when it's got to be written as a book). Like u said it's for only africans, because even europeans and other races wouldn't understand our broken english. There again u make ur story unique because it's the first broken english story.i've read and I loved it.
well done

P.S: as for the story building game, I'm in .

Mr mayor,
U try no be small. Kai!! Its just as if i'm watching a movie.
Infact, This will make a real movie.
I can't wait to read the next scene, Abi na act by act?
Peace!!!

DAM Mr. Mayor u really tried. C'mon I enjoyed every single bit of ur movie-story! Bobs u r the BOMB!, We the NAIRANS r so proud of u'.
MAKE THE UPCOMING STORY FAST OOOH I dey beg!

Honestly, I'm jealous of mrmayor. I don't understand the popularity of this story!!

@ mayor do you have another story in the works?

Seun don't be jealous ok, you can try and write one and maybe we will praise you that's if it's as good as mrmayor's

Well I have written two stories so far. One is on the front page. None has been rated as highly as this one.

mrmayor
why now no new story yet?

Nairalanders,

Thank you very much for your compliments,what can I say am really flattered.I have a few ideas about other stories but am finding it difficult developing a story line.

1.About young Nigerians starting a revelution to change Nigeria for the better.The revulution would be bloody,it will be televised and the revulution will not fail.
2.Forbidden Love.Love between a Lady Pastor and a Muslim Activist.They are drawn to each other but have to deal with their different faiths and what their friends and family would say and do.
3.Trials and Tribulations of a young Nigerian Graduate In Europe.

Guys please be patient am working hard for you.

Thanking all the women on this forum am glad you liked the story and am taking all your advice seriously.

Cheers

great

@All.

I promised I would write another story but I have no made any real progress till Seun's post about scripts for movies.Writing is really harder than I thought I would be especially if you want to keep the story original and relevent to your readers.

My next story is about a subject very close to my heart,which is discussed in all Nigerian homes in the diaspora

1.Do we go back home?
2.When can we go back home
3.How do we the "Westernized"Nigerians fit in a chaotic society with multitude of problems.

                                                              RETURN FROM EXILE[

This story is about a self exiled successful Nigerian doctor in Britain who had decided to pack it all in and return home.The good doctor though successful in the UK had never felt at home in his adopted country.He never felt confortable in his new country,unmarried and lonely after a string of bad relationships and he felt so home sick,he wants to feel the warm embraced of his mother again and eat proper food "wey dem wash hand cook"not all that phony Nigerian cuisine sold all over London.

Guys,

I hope you would enjoy the story as this one,feel free to criticize as you want I'll take no offense,I'll try and complete the story as the days progress.

Thanks

_{* salivating*}

Interesting one. Also read https://www.nairaland.com/2016984/sweet-lovely-house-boy-part

I luv happy ending.nice story.

Ka:
MrMayor,

I was going to comment on this, but I was laughing too loud to come up with anything sensible!

..me sef just dy observe...chaaii..sista xta go suffer...(sit nd relax as i sip my chill bottle of mountain dew)