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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Culture / Outrageous Brideprice! (8068 Views)
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Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Pennywise(m): 3:48pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
There is a good side to the concept. In Igbo land you all would have noticed that their divorce rate is lower than the country average. Secondly the men marry some what later when they are financially and emotionally matured. Not for some idiot to take in a responsible girl and mess up her life when he is neither financially nor emotionally matured |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Mgbejume: 3:49pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
I know of a tribe where the groom has to build a house for the brides Father. What will u say about that Brideprice is more like you appreciating your future inlaws for taking care of your wife to be from her day of birth till date, and a lot of parents will want to use that avenue to reap the poor man of his hard earned money without really thinking of how the newly weds will fare when they get married. Maybe some feel the newly weds will feed on sand and stones for breakfast, lunch and dinner |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Nobody: 3:53pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Pennywise: He paid 6 million for Bride Price things?? I find that very difficult to beleive. Anyway, I dont support outrageous expliotations in the name of Bride Price. But I still dont see enything wrong in paying a reasonable bride price. In my place, the bride's family usually request for some money. Maybe like 10k and the they write a list of things for tyhe groom to buy, that wont exceed 5k. At the end of the day, the girl's father takes N10 and returns N9,990 to the groom and his family. Its just to say, 'I'm not rejecting your gift, but I'm not selling my daughter either'. Thats a beautiful tradition and it often brings tears to my eyes. |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by HRhotness(f): 3:54pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Pennywise: i think that is largely due to the fact they marry very young girls who thay can train and mold to suit them. . . |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Pennywise(m): 3:55pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Mgbejume:No doubt bride price like anything concieved by human is subject to abuse. But this is an aspect of our culture worth emulating by the west so that any TD&H with prick doesnt become a nuisance to the larger society in the name of marriage |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by whatever90(f): 3:55pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
he did not pay it as a whole like dat,things he bought ,and the money he gave to them was getting to that range im an igbo girl too,but seriously abeg ,its too much in d igbo culture,d anambarians are not realy like d ohter tribes wen it comes to dis bride price of a thing igbos demand too much ,and dats d simple truth |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by HRhotness(f): 3:57pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Ujujoan: I've never seen that done, but it makes a lot of sense why cant the groom bringing drinks and gifts for the ceremony be enough. . . bearing in mind he has to do this twice |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Pennywise(m): 3:59pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
HR.hotness:Or more likely, the men who can afford to pay the B/P have done well for themselves and would have the wisdom and maturity to keep a home |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by HRhotness(f): 4:04pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Pennywise: affording ridiculous prices deosnt necessarily mean u r blessed with wisdom and maturity. . for all u knw thay may see it as another chance to throw money around and show off, like buying a really pricey car. . . which makes it worse because the woman is just another acquisition |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Nobody: 4:05pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
I've never seen that done, but it makes a lot of sense The guys doesent pay for anything. In my place and in most places, the guy just pays the bride price and buys the things on the 'list'. The feeding and drinks for the ceremony is usally the bride's family's responsibiltiy. They see it that the groom and his family came to marry their daughter, so its their reponsibility to take care of their guests. Its only the white wedding that the groom pays for. he did not pay it as a whole like that,things he bought ,and the money he gave to them was getting to that range Your brother was just trying to show off but spending big. Its not a requirement. If he dosent have the money to do those things, he'll still marry the girl. My elder sisters are married to people from Imo, and Enugu and I've never heard of such exorbitant criteria for marriage. |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by HRhotness(f): 4:10pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Ujujoan: i knw the brides family cater for d traditional wedding. . . but doesnt d groom get to bring gifts and drinks during d introduction and the traditional wedding? in western cultures d brides family pays for the white wedding, i see it fit as it is her day anyways |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by whitelexi(m): 4:12pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Ujujoan: Well thats in your place sha, not in all of iboland Ordinary knock on the door is bloody expensive, talk less of what else is there to be done. Even the ceremonials are done by the groom, the shaks and chops are provided by the groom, the bride's family do nothing but collect the cash. I had to pity the guy that came to marry my sis, i was feeling for him but thats the culture, we didnt create it, we wont be stopping it. I'm probably gonna face the same thing when the time comes so, tough luck! |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Pennywise(m): 4:15pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
HR.hotness:Lets face it. Woven deep in the concept of marriage from proposal by the man to the actual marriage is acquisition. Not like buying a commodity but acquisition by being worthy to be her husband more than any other man. If throwing money around makes you happy, do it. |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Mgbejume: 4:17pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
@ Ujujoan, Chick, u are right, i have a friend who is the 1st male child of the family and the first child also, he was the one to give his younger sister away, his family told him that no matter the amount his future inlaw brings, he should collect it, take only N10 and give them the remaining. They re same Igbos you all are complaining that they collect outrageous amounts. |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Pennywise(m): 4:18pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
H.RHotness, sorry but you are going to be acquired real soon. Yes you are facing acquisition without knowing it. |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by walttt(m): 4:26pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
soon parents ll start quarrelling over their inability to have female children n the dad ll be like: darling, I've told u i need just one son n 9 female children, u know they r like investments in the London Stock Exchange |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by HRhotness(f): 4:28pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Pennywise: i see that sa the basis for the lack of respect and equality in marriages, which in turn is the basis for women being subverted and demeaned in modern society. . . when ur husband doesnt see u as a partner but as an acquisition. . . almost slave like, , , u hav no real rights and basically u loose ur individuality i say d tradition of bride prices r evil!!! |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Exstar(f): 4:29pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
walttt: Aren't you very funny, dear! |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by HRhotness(f): 4:30pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Pennywise: LOL. . . i reject u in Jesus name like i said earlier, my mum shares my opinion on thsi ridiculous practise. . . no man can afford my brideprice; anyman who wants to acquire me will hav to pay alot more than money. . . but any guy who wants to marry me only has to win my heart |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Mgbejume: 4:39pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
walttt: Thats really funny Pennywise: U wont be only facing acquisition but merging |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by HRhotness(f): 4:41pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Mgbejume: a merger is a more acceptable option |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by walttt(m): 4:41pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Exstar:(like a calabar dude) u mean me?!10ks |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by walttt(m): 4:46pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
yeah it might be funny, but soon it'll be obtainable, u'll see. U know da LSE dont crash always like da NYSE, n igbo gurls, hmmm |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by whitelexi(m): 4:47pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
I wonder how it feels like, being acquired, no matter the cost, no matter the competition to win the heart, somebody still won your hand in the end, DAMN! Its so good to be a guy |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by tamai(f): 4:49pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
this exorbitant bride price is really crazy.in kalabari (rivers state),its equally as high as that of the east, if not higher.but in this case they are categorised,in that the most expensive is the most complete marriage,giving full ownership of the wife to the husband.when she dies she is not taken to her people, but buried in the husbands compound. |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by tamai(f): 4:54pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
whitelexi:i wonder how it feels like,paying though your ass,andbegging like mad to care,protect and provide for somebody,who at trhe end of the day may not even be worth it. its so good to be a woman. |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by whitelexi(m): 4:56pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
tamai: You so wish! |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Mgbejume: 4:56pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
tamai: Then wahala go de gas for this kain situation oh! in that the most expensive is the most complete marriage ODIKWA EGWU |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Pennywise(m): 5:00pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
HR.hotness:You be Ibo girl abi? Your reaction under certain circumstances is fortunately quite familiar and very predictable. Believe me I know how far. The stages in a relationship with an ibo girl are 1-"I hate the bastard", 2-"Maybe he is not too bad afterall", 3 "I think I like him", 4 "I just love him",5" I would love him to marry him". Now stages 2-4 can be short-circuited depending on the motivation of the man. don't tempt me |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by walttt(m): 5:02pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
Well, as an igbo boy who has swore to marry either a ghanaian[s](not, well, maybe cos of their big booty ), [/s] a Jamaican, an afri american or an Igbo girl, i'll say, i'm saving up for the bride price, hell, i already started an account with my bankers (Umuchinemereihediegwu Community Bank)- Dowry Easy Payment Plan DEPP, more like Johnny D n i know before d next 3 yrs when i'll be 27 n ready for marriage, my DEPP would pay off. So igbo guys in the House, i suggest u take a cue, |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Nobody: 5:03pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
tamai: LOL |
Re: Outrageous Brideprice! by Nobody: 5:04pm On Nov 03, 2008 |
tamai: What's wrong with that? |
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