whitelexi:

You so wish!

The best part is that no matter how expensive it is, U WILL DEFINITELY PAY.

stillwater:

What's wrong with that?

nothing my dear,but that's their own explanation for their exorbitant price.

am new here but i think there is sumtin lyk core igbo person,

As she got Married to her husband and his family, his family began to insult her that she was soo cheap and desperate, that that was why she begged her Parents to cut down on somethings and accept what her husband would give them  .

Illiterate people should be the least of her worries.

tamai:

nothing my dear,but that's their own explanation for their exorbitant price.

Ok.

Pennywise:

You be Ibo girl abi? Your reaction under certain circumstances is fortunately quite familiar and very predictable. Believe me I know how far. The stages in a relationship with an ibo girl are 1-"I hate the bastard", 2-"Maybe he is not too bad afterall", 3 "I think I like him", 4 "I just love him",5" I would love him to marry him".

Now stages 2-4 can be short-circuited depending on the motivation of the man. don't tempt me

LOL

Glory be. . . i am sooo not ibo. . . so ur juju no go work!

rotawax:

am new here but i think there is sumtin like core igbo person,

good to have you in here, but what do you mean by a core igbo person.cos to me
an igbo person is an igbo person is an igbo person.so?

HR.hotness:

LOL

Glory be. . . i am sooo not ibo. . . so ur juju no go work!

girl, you no be am.

2 be candid with u, i wouldn't c it much as exorbitant, the price tags on our igbo gurls head, n not just them, but the tribes who demand pretty high sums.
Most parents arguably see it as a way of recouping the huge sums spent in training their kids.
No be we start am, but we could stop it, but not before i rake in da price money on my sissy who's bout to get married
[s]_{(as diokpala i go snatch am comot from popsy, make i hammer)}[/s]

tamai:

The best part is that no matter how expensive it is, U WILL DEFINITELY PAY.

Yeah, but u know what u're paying for
And you are the one buying! Not the one being bought

tamai:

The best part is that no matter how expensive it is, U WILL DEFINITELY PAY.

@ whitelexi
and i hope cupid makes you pick one yellow pawpaw whose relatives are merciless - you'll find yourself borrowing to pay whatever they ask because you're soooo in love!

Mgbejume:

A couple were planning to get married, and as custom demands the Husband to be went to he girls parents to ask for her hand in marriage which her parents accepted. On giving the list for the necessary things the groom has to purchase for the family the bride price inclusive, the sum total was outrageous.

The guy and his family left with the list. When the lady in question was told by her husband to be the outrageous amount her Parents gave him, she now advised that he should do what he can and she will talk to her parents.
After pleading with her parents, her parents agreed and everything regarding the marriage ceremony was done.

As she got Married to her husband and his family, his family began to insult her that she was soo cheap and desperate, that that was why she begged her Parents to cut down on somethings and accept what her husband would give them  .

What do you think? Is it wrong as a lady to talk your parents into reducing the total cost the groom to be has to pay on her?

The groom's family should be spanked.
There's nuthing wrong with a woman negotiating with her parents to knock the brideprice down.

stillwater:

What's wrong with that?

Nothing is wrong with it my dear, as she said for a family to feel that their daughter has properly gotten married, such an exorbitant brideprice has to be paid, so if such huge amount is not paid, the brides family will feel their daughter was not properly married and definately i dont think there is any family that will want to feel sooooo

iceblue:

@ whitelexi
and i hope cupid makes you pick one yellow pawpaw whose relatives are merciless - you'll find yourself borrowing to pay whatever they ask because you're soooo in love!

Awww, i can be in love, but not foolish

Its not gonna happen sweetie, i can smell a bargain from miles away

Mgbejume:

Nothing is wrong with it my dear, as she said for a family to feel that their daughter has properly gotten married, such an exorbitant brideprice has to be paid, so if such huge amount is not paid, the brides family will feel their daughter was not properly married and definately i don't think there is any family that will want to feel sooooo

Both parents agree, the couple agree, what is there to feel like they are not properly married? People like giving themselves unnecessary headaches.

~Sauron~:

The groom's family should be spanked.
There's nuthing wrong with a woman negotiating with her parents to knock the brideprice down.

That's funny  :DSpanking he grooms family, should i get a koboko so u ll do it??  

Mgbejume:

That's funny :DSpanking he grooms family, should i get a koboko so u ll do it??

I would spank em with delight. . . . .
The poor woman only helped her hubby's finances by knocking the price down.
If he squanders all his savings on engagement, what would he eat after the wedding??
Some Naija peops are just daft.

Secondly the men marry some what later when they are financially and emotionally matured

That's when the control freak comes in. "You werent there when I was making my money therefore I dont have to run any family monetary decisions by you"

I dont see how it's a good thing to have a tradition that forces men to wait til they're in their mid 40s before they can get married without "disgrace"

Bride price varies from place to place. I know where I'm from it's about 8 thousand naira or so. I know some villages that charge by what kinda degree the girl has in school eg if she has a bachelors or masters or even those in medical school . The price goes way up to match her educational qualifications. Now this is outrageous!!

My beef with this bride price thing starts with some unknown people aka umuada putting some ridiculous amount and making unnecessary demands to the groom?
Second, the thought some man would use it as a rememberance on "who's boss".

stillwater:

My beef with this bride price thing starts with some unknown people aka umuada putting some ridiculous amount and making unnecessary demands to the groom?
Second, the thought some man would use it as a rememberance on "who's boss"?

It's the tradition and i support the umuadas. . . . . .
Besides, whether a man pays the brideprice or u pay it by yourself, a man would still lord over you.
Whose house are u gonna be moving to??

stillwater:

My beef with this bride price thing starts with some unknown people aka umuada putting some ridiculous amount and making unnecessary demands to the groom?
Second, the thought some man would use it as a rememberance on "who's boss".

Exactly

I'm not sure we have "umuada" in YorubaLand though. Hopefully not.

"oh I remember saying hello to her when she passed my house everyt morning therefore I must eat from the wedding stuff" Pathetic freeloaders

tradition must be upheld!
God blessed me with a daughter and now you folks want the rules changed.
no way!
I've already calculated the remainder of our mortgage and that is her bride price

plus_Queen:

tradition must be upheld!
God blessed me with a daughter and now you folks want the rules changed.
no way!
I've already calculated the remainder of our mortgage and that is her bride price

Goodluck with that.

plus_Queen:

tradition must be upheld!
God blessed me with a daughter and now you folks want the rules changed.
no way!
I've already calculated the remainder of our mortgage and that is her bride price

Thank u!!!!
Stilly, can u borrow a leaf from Queenisha??

~Sauron~:

It's the tradition and i support the umuadas. . . . . .
Besides, whether a man pays the brideprice or u pay it by yourself, a man would still lord over you.
Whose house are u going to be moving to??

The respect I give to him would drop instantly if he mentions that ridiculous statement. I don't take such things lightly.
Lord over me? Nonsense. Sounds like bondage.

KarmaMod:

Exactly

I'm not sure we have "umuada" in YorubaLand though. Hopefully not.

"oh I remember saying hello to her when she passed my house everyt morning therefore I must eat from the wedding stuff" Pathetic freeloaders

Don't know much about these things. It was even on NL I heard about umuada Some people should just be expecting nothing from me.

If I can have my way I would elope with my lover, my family can kill me later.

stillwater:

The respect I give to him would drop instantly if he mentions that ridiculous statement. I don't take such things lightly.
Lord over me? Nonsense. Sounds like bondage.

It's not bondage. . . . .The man is the head!!!

stillwater:

If I can have my way I would elope with my lover, my family can kill me later.

Mint!!!
Now thatz what i am talking about. . . . . .
I have many places we could elope to. . . .Barbados, Solomon Islands, Aruba, Virgin Islands(pick one).

stillwater:

The respect I give to him would drop instantly if he mentions that ridiculous statement. I don't take such things lightly.
Lord over me? Nonsense. Sounds like bondage.

Don't know much about these things. It was even on NL I heard about umuada Some people should just be expecting nothing from me.

My sister wait until a suitor comes knocking.
Then you hear about them.
They are powerful.
They have their own list that must be honored
and the men (umunna) have their own requirements
In my own case,my dad did not take any dowry except a symbolic one naira note but the contents on the lists had to be bought by the suitor whether we liked it or not.
That one is almost non negotiable
and if the father pities the suitor,he'll have to buy them himself.

I have nothing against bride price sha because most times a man won't respect you if he didn't pay your bride price.

~Sauron~:

It's not bondage. . . . .The man is the head!!!

You can't do whatever you please, you have to like consult the other before he gives you the go ahead. That's BONDAGE!!!!

Mint!!!
Now thatz what i am talking about. . . . . .
I have many places we could elope to. . . .Barbados, Solomon Islands, Aruba, Virgin Islands(pick one).

Heaven

@topic

Is the woman in the story happy with her marriage

~Sauron~:

The poor woman only helped her hubby's finances by knocking the price down.
If he squanders all his savings on engagement, what would he eat after the wedding??

nice point

On the issue of the those advocating for the bride price i think it is a powerful cultural symbol of appreciating the worth of women folk but it has been abused in some quarters and thus has become a money making schme thus makking some of our pretty ladies not getting married early or not at all,

its not prevalant where i come from so i no suppose get wahala

stillwater:

You can't do whatever you please, you have to like consult the other before he gives you the go ahead. That's BONDAGE!!!!

I disagree.

Heaven

You are on your own.
Heaven ko. . . . .Hell ni.