sisimose:

utter nonsense, show of ignorance and extreme self delusion

Seun:

Do you seriously mean you don't believe in the Holy Coconut? That is so strange. Are you an atheist?

sisimose:

utter nonsense, show of ignorance and extreme self delusion

Wonders shall never end!! Who is this megalo-atheist accusing others??

Seun:

I find your lack of faith disturbing. You've committed the unforgivable sin: "touch not those drenched in coco-milk"!

Seun:

I find your lack of faith disturbing. You've committed the unforgivable sin: "touch not those drenched in coco-milk"!

Seun:

Nferyn, you have grieved the Most Exalted High & Mighty Ancient Milk Of The Coconut by calling me a heretic.

Remember this verse: "All coconut heads, one they are. You, divide the indivisible coco-people, must not."

Ka:



Babaearly, I shall look into the possibility of opening a Sexual Services Division. If I do, your name shall definitely be near the top of the list.

Ka:
Good day, and may the Blessings of the Coconut be upon you all.

First of all, I am deeply, deeply outraged, shocked and saddened that my most noble endeavour is being interpreted as something as sordid as... as... (excuse me while I compose myself...) as a cash-making scheme! Imagine!!

It just goes to show how much work needs to be done to raise the level of spirituality in Nigeria if a man cannot found his Temple without it being viewed as a 'business' or 'investment' and without people jockeying for the positions of 'treasurer', 'financial consultant' or 'investment manager'. Fortunately, the Temple of the Sacred Coconut is more than prepared for this arduous task that lies ahead.

But first of all, I must make it unequivocally clear that no person is authorised on my behalf to solicit for donations or investment of any kind. In addition, at the time of writing, there has not been any official appointment of any kind, so beware of charlatans and fraudsters who may try to cash in on the Temple's rapidly growing popularity. All persons claiming to represent the Temple are hereby order to desist or face the full brunt of supernatural forces that I can summon at a moment's notice.

I will respond in due course to those who have responded to my call to participate in the World's First Democratic Temple. To reward them for their prompt contributions, I shall be awarding them titles. In fact, it will a cornerstone of the Temple's policy to dash titles out left, right and centre so that our members feel valued and recognised. So Royal Prophet Seun and Most Holy Evangelist Whiteshark, await my reply.


Yours in Sanctity,

(Cardinal (Reverend) ((Deacon) Apostle)) Ka

The One and Only Founder, the Temple of the Sacred Coconut

nferyn:
Seun, you know this only applies to the non-chosen peoples. By choosing the life and virtue of the coconut you will be saved, regardless of your behaviour on this earth.

Glory be to the Nutcases of this earth

Seun:

Do you seriously mean you don't believe in the Holy Coconut? That is so strange. Are you an atheist?

Look at the stars, look at the plants and animals around us. Do you think they created themselves?
Of course not! The Holy Coconut created all of them with its refreshing milk.

"In the beginning was the Milk, and the Milk was Tastee, and it was in the Coconut" says the Sacred Calabash.
It is from that Milk that everything you see around you - stars, sun, moon, earth, living things - germinated!