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Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? - Romance (11) - Nairaland

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Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Wisegeek01(m): 9:38am On Nov 14, 2014
Bro it's wrong oo o,

There are Billions of other cute ladies out there, in diffrent shapes and sizes

And it's ur cousin you want to date (possibly marry) and u tryna justify yourself,

I know u are problably joking*

but if u mean it, nd u still want to go ahead with ur Ideas, u don't need anyone's permission here on NL, Na ur bizness ooo

*washes hand*
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by uchennaq(m): 9:39am On Nov 14, 2014
ITS VERY UNFORTUNATE THAT MOST PEOPLE HERE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY SOME UNLEARNED CIVILIZED PEOPLE TEND TO FROWN AT COUSINS MARRIAGE. FOR THOSE THAT DON'T KNOW BELOW IS THE REASON, NOT GOD FORBID OR TUFIAKWA. STOP WALLOWING IN ABJECT IGNORANCE MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS

[b]Some people are fixated on the fallacy that cousin couples pose an intolerable risk to their offspring. However it is likely that we are all descendants of cousin marriages. Before civil laws banning cousin marriages, it was preferable to marry a cousin in some communities as it is to this day in many countries. The notion "why marry a stranger" is just as prevalent in many countries as the cousin marriage taboo in America today. There are a wide range of opinions on the subject of cousin marriages. This is fuelled by erroneous information, bigotry, and presumptions. Further we have civil laws and religious creeds based on obsolete information.

The facts about cousin marriages are much clearer.

Fears of cousins who marry having children with birth defects are exaggerated. Simply marrying within your own race increases the odds of birth defects. Marrying within your own town further increases your chances. Cousin couples have only a slightly higher incidence of birth defects than non-related couples.[/b]
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by uchennaq(m): 9:45am On Nov 14, 2014
Wisegeek01:
Bro it's wrong oo o,

There are Billions of other cute ladies out there, in diffrent shapes and sizes

And it's ur cousin you want to date (possibly marry) and u tryna justify yourself,

I know u are problably joking*

but if u mean it, nd u still want to go ahead with ur Ideas, u don't need anyone's permission here on NL, Na ur bizness ooo

*washes hand*

BUT WHAT ARE YOUR REASONS...YOUR JUST TALKING WITHOUT REASONS.... I CAN'T MAKE UP ANYTHING FROM TUFIAKWA OR WASHING OFF HANDS OR GOD FORBID. 3 PASTORS CAN'T BE WRONG ON THIS ISSUE.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by sibepoc(m): 9:47am On Nov 14, 2014
If I and my cousin falls in love with each other, we'll go ahead and marry oo. Nothing concern me. Rules and regulations of this life are too much abeg
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by uchennaq(m): 9:51am On Nov 14, 2014
ABI NA COMMUNITY DEY DECIDE FOR UNA. WHAT CONCERNS ME WITH WHAT COMMUNITY IS SAYING. ARE THEY FEEDING ME. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IS HAPPINESS.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Suzyky4u(f): 9:57am On Nov 14, 2014
Lankaline:





wow,,,was there last week,,,i always stop there(oguta junction) when goin to ma villa,,(amiri),,,,,we r from same road,,,but not cousin-wise,,lolz

Lol. Good to know. I've been to Amiri like three times sha.

1 Like

Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by justmag(m): 10:01am On Nov 14, 2014
Oh hell nah!! You will burn in hell real quick for that ishh! You better let the lord guide you to a real woman. All these girls walking around and you wanna date family.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by rezy15(m): 10:01am On Nov 14, 2014
Benard94:
hmmm...search your bible very well
no debate blindly. Abraham no marry im sister ? Issac no tym im sister too?
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by uchennaq(m): 10:01am On Nov 14, 2014
THESE PEOPLE ARE MORE LEARNED, EDUCATED AND WELL POLISHED THAN AFRICANS. READ THIS. AMERICAN'S ARE NOT ILLITERATES LIKE MOST OF US HERE. IGNORANCE IS A DISEASE THAT IS WHY SOME PEOPLE ARE SHOUTING JONATHAN MUST GO DUE TO IGNORANCE. MOST PEOPLE HERE ARE GRADUATES, WHY DON'T WE MAKE RESEARCH AND SOLVE ISSUE. NO WONDER MOST OF THE YOUTHS THAT FINISHED FROM THE HIGHER INSTITUTIONS DON'T HAVE JOBS, BECAUSE THEY GO TO SCHOOL TO PASS NOT CARRY OUT RESEARCH SO THAT OUR LEVEL OF THINKING WILL IMPROVE. THIS VERY UNFORTUNATE

Loving v. Virginia

Richard and Mildred Loving were married in 1958 in Washington D.C. because their home state of Virginia still upheld the anti miscegenation law which stated that interracial marriages were illegal. They were married, and then lived together in Caroline County, Virginia. In 1959 they were prosecuted and convicted of violating the state's anti miscegenation law. They were each sentenced one-year in jail, but promised the sentence would be suspended if they agreed to leave the state and not return for 25 years. Forced to move, they returned to Washington D.C. where, in 1963, they initiated a suit challenging the constitutionality of the anti miscegenation law. In March of 1966, the Virginia Supreme Court of Appeals upheld the law, but in June of 1967, the U.S. Supreme Court unanimously ruled the law unconstitutional. Thus, in 1967 the 16 states which still had anti miscegenation laws on their books were forced to erase them.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Ballotelle(m): 10:06am On Nov 14, 2014
chimerase2:
oh just shut up
Wich kind of useless view do u want him to view ua useless post
Wat is even wrong with the mentality of some pple gon self
Is ur cousin not ur sista angry
d fact dat u dnt suport it dosent mak it bad,whr in d bible or quran is it a sin, u r myopic in ur thought
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by uchennaq(m): 10:11am On Nov 14, 2014
HERE IS ANOTHER THREAD ON NAIRALAND BASED ON IGNORANCE AND NOT FACTS
https://www.nairaland.com/1989528/all-health-workers-now-consultants-fg

You guys don't know what we want and the agreement with govt you don't become a consultant base on union activities rather you become a consultant base on educational qualification
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by einsteino(m): 10:13am On Nov 14, 2014
donroxy:
how you come about einstein as your moniker is baffling to me :

INDIFFERENCE is english which implies ''I don't care'' whether you marry your cousin or you don't marry your cousin !

How you interpreted my ''indifference'' to implied I allow cousin marrying makes me to call the einstein behind your moniker to question !!

If you ask me whether I would do it : I will tell you NO but I won't condemn others who do it thus i'm INDIFFERENCE to it .... It is neither right nor wrong to me : it is what it is :

cousin marrying cousin !

you still dont get it, in the context being indifferent doesnt absolve you. there is no neither wrong nor right in this case. it is like a case of true or false, there is no middle grounds. in logic when you are indifferent in such a scenario it automatically means you are in favour of that which is perceived as the greater evil, it is just how it is. i know that wasnt what you meant, that was why I tried bringing it to your attention what your statement implies in logic.

also as to einstein being my moniker, it is actually my legal name i didn't beg for it and like shakespare said "that which is called a rose would still smell as sweet if called by another name". It is amazing how easy it is for people to sit behind a computer and insult someone at the least chance they get, i bet it would be a lot harder to do that if we were having a face to face conversation. i still wonder what was provocative in my previous comment that you had to condescend to such.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Misolex(m): 10:33am On Nov 14, 2014
To doz wey dey 5n one law to hide unda...its scripturali wrong....
Bt we no no weda we don Nab our cousin b4.
Nna ehn....GOD HELP US ALL...SHALL WE CONTINUE IN SIN AND SAY THE GRACE OF GOD SHOULD ABOUND?
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by hzrvip(f): 10:33am On Nov 14, 2014
Benard94:
There is this raging arguement in my area as to if one could date/marry his/her cousin. Some stood frankly against it while others saw no crack in it. Apart, what is the measure of closeness where one could restrict dating? Is cousin-dating ethical?

nonth embarassed
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Rashdimuh(m): 10:38am On Nov 14, 2014
Medically it is not Good if ur family have an history like asthma it keeps on spreadin.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Nobody: 10:44am On Nov 14, 2014
rollykotex:
I just asked someone in my office,and the person was so offended that u said islam allows that.He needs that verse of the quoran that supports it
Check what I posted above ..........

One's cousin is not among those forbid by islam for marriage as stated in Qur'an 4 vs 23 thus cousin marrying cousin is allowed in most Islamic oriented cultures those forbidden for marriage are explicitly stated in the qur'an !

In islam you can't marry your nephew/niece neither your aunt/uncle but you can marry the daughter/son of your aunt/uncle i.e Your cousin
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Nobody: 10:57am On Nov 14, 2014
einsteino:
you still dont get it, in the context being indifferent doesnt absolve you. there is no neither wrong nor right in this case. it is like a case of true or false, there is no middle grounds. in logic when you are indifferent in such a scenario it automatically means you are in favour of that which is perceived as the greater evil, it is just how it is. i know that wasnt what you meant, that was why I tried bringing it to your attention what your statement implies in logic.

also as to einstein being my moniker, it is actually my legal name i didn't beg for it and like shakespare said "that which is called a rose would still smell as sweet if called by another name". It is amazing how easy it is for people to sit behind a computer and insult someone at the least chance they get, i bet it would be a lot harder to do that if we were having a face to face conversation i still wonder what was provocative in my previous comment that you had to condescend to such.
I'm so sorry 4 my outburst but do not be so sure about the bolded cuz I would still say what I gatto say and possibly apologise afterward !!

There is no point in arguing so far with you and that is why I called your einstein to question : the title of Op is whether cousin marriage is ethical or not now tell me how such is a yes/no question ?
How did ethical issues become a yes/no question when a prohibition in a particular society is a norm in another society !!

I'm a muslim and a Yoruba man and a social/Management scientist I'd provided opinion regarding my culture, belief and judgement .... How you now come about your logic of me approving it is what baffles me ....

I don't see it as right nor wrong .... What is abomination in Igboland might be a norm in America .......

The only reason I will explicitly say NO is if such practice has dire health/philosophical consequences !!
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by omoharry(f): 11:00am On Nov 14, 2014
I hope you remember the blood disease that almost wipe out the Royal Family in Europe due to this kind of close blooding line marriage and breeding among family members back in the 19th century. stay clear of this kind of relationship oo. it has its physical and spiritual repercussion.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Psalmwise(m): 11:03am On Nov 14, 2014
Anytin bad in it well I don't know......can u share same bed wit ur cousin for a month without any tin ape in?? Konji nah bad tin oo
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by WINDSOW(m): 11:12am On Nov 14, 2014
Iye mhe! This is a sacrilege! Osanobua!!! OP,u are a caricature of urself.Why should u ask tis abominable question?Am sure u've nt start browsing ur relatives kpekus oo.Else na death ooo.
No try am ooo,it's a very BIG TABOO.

I've parrotize ooo!!!
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by DAVE5(m): 11:37am On Nov 14, 2014
google1:
abomination

dis one no be small abomination sha...


tufiakwa
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by ATTAHDYE(m): 11:45am On Nov 14, 2014
it depends on where you come from and the cultural marriage laws of your people. Here in the north among the fulani's and hausa, cousins are allowed to marry.



Note: I didn't say Muslims, only "fulani and hausa" tradition.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by fuadolawale(m): 11:50am On Nov 14, 2014
How can u think of a question like that. This kinda question is not worth answering because yaa cousin is still part of ya family member so don't get it twisted my peeps.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Chukskala: 12:45pm On Nov 14, 2014
It's incest
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by mcgaius: 12:54pm On Nov 14, 2014
Benard94:
There is this raging arguement in my area as to if one could date/marry his/her cousin. Some stood frankly against it while others saw no crack in it. Apart, what is the measure of closeness where one could restrict dating? Is cousin-dating ethical?

I think the question should be rephrased like this...Is sister dating ethical?una don comot for gay and lesbians and now na sister and cousin una wan enter.Very soon na daddy and mummy.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by criuze(m): 1:14pm On Nov 14, 2014
Forbidden fruit . On your own brother. Since when you begin Bleep you cousin na today you wan tell us
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by PlutoLA(m): 1:20pm On Nov 14, 2014
charlsecy:

Stop lying, or saying what you wrongly think is true without verification. The Bible does not forbid cousin marriages. Such a marriage is not allowed in my community, anyway, but don't say what is contrary to the words in the Bible.
Read Leviticus 18:6,the bible clearly stars that one must not have sexual relations with a close relative or someone near of kin. Is your cousin not a close relative??!
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Umennajiego(m): 1:27pm On Nov 14, 2014
Forbidden marriage and passages in d bible

Between mother and son. (Note that sexual relations between father and daughter are prohibited by Lev. 18:6 and 21:2-3)Leviticus 18:7-8
With stepchildren.Leviticus 18:8, 17
With an aunt.Leviticus 18:12-14
With sister or half-sister.Leviticus 18:9; Deut. 27:22
With half-sister and stepsisters.Leviticus 18:11
With daughter-in-law.Leviticus 18:15
With your sister-in-law.Leviticus 18:16
With your granddaughter.Leviticus 18:10
With your step-granddaughter.

#Online research#
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by PlutoLA(m): 1:27pm On Nov 14, 2014
rezy15:

no debate blindly. Abraham no marry im sister ? Issac no tym im sister too?
That was b4 God laid down the new law for the Israelites
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by Umennajiego(m): 1:32pm On Nov 14, 2014
We all are gonna learn something here am not the best read neither am I a genius...
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by ugsams(m): 1:40pm On Nov 14, 2014
Umennajiego:
The Bible does not forbid marrying your cousin so let's make sure in our zeal to help others that we don't confuse what our culture teaches with what the Bible teaches.

Isaiah 5:20 Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!

Leviticus 18 lists the forbidden relationships and cousins are not forbidden nor is cousin marriage forbidden anywhere else in the Bible.

God may have chosen your cousin for you and if He chose him it would be a sin to walk away from this. There is no evidence that there is a significant increase in birth defects when cousins marry. The preferred marriage among the Israelites was cousin to cousin marriage and Jews to this day have an average I.Q. of over 120 with the highest population of Geniuses in the world. Ever hear of Einstein?

Both Albert Einstein and Charles Darwin married their first cousins. If such scientists as these had no fear of "defects" in their children then you should not. Their children were all healthy and bright. However, if you're really stupid and your cousin is really stupid then there is a much higher chance that your children will be really stupid. Is there room for a little humor here?

The fact is that cousin marriage was banned by the Roman Catholic church under 'Pope Gregory I' in an attempt to prevent the accumulation of wealth and power within families. The popes saw wealth among the common man as competition for their own power. This power structure exists in the Philippines to this day and is hampering economic development. The ban had nothing to do with our Bibles which we read regularly, don't we?

Civil disobedience has a long history within the Christian community. You've all heard of people power. When the people gathered by the thousands outside of Malacanang to oust Marcos that was against the law. Was it a sin? No. If you must go to another province or state to marry your cousin so that nobody will report you then that is what you must do. Will that be against the law? Maybe. Is it a sin? No. This is not unheard of in the Philippines, The United States, and many other countries where Born Again Christians live in sufficient numbers to make such laws of no effect. I know of such a couple in the Philippines and they live happily to this day. They're now in their 60s with 5 children and many grandchildren. They're born again of course because it is the pope who forbids cousin marriage, not the Bible.

Enjoy for your reading pleasure grin[color=#000099][/color]

It seems you have a strong point here but my conscience will not allow me do this.
Re: Dating Your Cousin: Is It Ethical? by wabbyland(m): 1:50pm On Nov 14, 2014
Dear nairalanders, I'm a young man with a girlfriend that's been acting funny recently. It all started when my girlfriend called me in the midnight and complained about her cousin, who's been sharing the same room with her under he dad's roof, that he has been making attempts to have sex with her and give one baseless excuse of having a pain at the lower part of his stomach and he needed to discharge some of his sperm in order to feel alright. One thing led to another and he dad asked her to pack out(cos of her stepmother) and without consulting me, she packed her thing to that cousin's house. Now she's claiming he's a changed person and doesn't ask for sex anymore. Can u sincerely trust that kind of girl? Would u continue with that relationship?

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