1. CNN has said our Economy is growing. The best
Economists are at the World Bank. Now you have
all these Nigerian Economists talking nonsense.
Do they know better than CNN or World Bank?

2. Nigeria is not poor. Come and see the amount
of private jets Nigerians parked at Kenya Airport
when we went to Nairobi for Conference. Kenyans
were just looking at us with envy. How can you
say Nigerians are poor

3. Nigerians need jobs. Vote for me and i will
create Unemployment

4'. We are giving special Scholarships to our First
Class Graduates.......in ten years time, they are
going to take us to the Moon

5. How can you jus say $20 billion is missing. If
that kind of money is missing, the Americans will
know. They know everything

6.Corruption is not stealing. If you put yam where
a goat is, the goat will eat the yam.

7. If you go to Lagos and shout "ole ole" they will
stone you well well. But if you shout "corruption",
people will jus be looking at you.

8.Why should i declare my assets? I don't give a
damn!

9.People are just raising false alarm. How can
200 children go missing jus like that? It is our
enemies trying to cause confusion. But we are
investigating the matter

10. We are going to rebuild the Chibook school.
And we are going to build high fences round the
school to protect them next time . Yes Yes.

11. People keep saying,why don't we go to
Chibook, why don't we go to Chibook. Aaah, we
can't go to Chibook jus like that. The Boko Haram
people will fire at us.

12. This Abuja bombing is not by MEND. We know
it is by Boko Haram. They are everywhere. Boko
Haram is even in my Government.

13. Boko Haram are our siblings. You can't set
the Army to go and wipe out your family

14. Mend tried to kill me. They came to bomb me
in Abuja. That is why we jailed Henry Okah in
South Africa

15. I did not plan the Election postponement. Even
my Service Chiefs did not consult me.

16. If i knew Election was going to be postponed,
why will i waste my time and Federal Government
money to go and campaign in Bayelsa.

17. I am the Commander in Chief of the Armed
Forces. You don't expect me to go and be fighting
in Sambisa forest. People jus talk anyhow.

18. We are going to buy Guns and give good
Pensions to our Brave Soldiers, so that when they
are killed, their families will not suffer

19. Some people jus call themselves Statesman
for nothing. They jump about and talk like motor
park touts.

20. After God and my Parents, the third person i
thank most for my life is President Olusegun
Obasanjo.

21. I want to apologise to the people of Rivers
State for not bringing any Projects here. It is
because i don't want people to say i am doing
favouritism. Vote for me and in the next 4 years
you will see my hand

22. I am the sitting President. If there is any
trouble, it is me that the United Nations Secretary
General calls. Everything is on my head.

23. May 29 Swearing in Day is sacrosanct.
Definitely, a new President will be sworn in on
that day.

..........and so on and so forth.

Ok

That guy is flawlessly clueless.

na wao, ojowa gbe tule