Can Christian Singles Romance?

Yes! No! Or Maybe!

I am not stating this opinion of mine as a Christian Spiritual principle, but I am sure that if you follow me, you would agree with me that Single Christians can, cannot and may not romance. Mind you, you are entitled to your own opinion.

First things first. What is romance? I bet you have never checked a dictionary for its meaning. Romance will simply mean doing and saying things which make the other person feel loved, special, only, accepted, cared for and wanted.

Encarta Dictionary says amongst its much definition that romance is “physical love: sexual love, especially when the other person or the relationship is idealized or when it is exciting and intense.” Under its Thesaurus, it is “allure, excitement…feeling, sensation…sense of excitement…. According to the same Thesaurus Dictionary, allure means “attraction, appeal, draw, pull (informal), magnetism, charm, glamor, fascination, charisma.”Taking all these meanings into consideration, what is your position regarding the question. Are you saying yes or no or maybe?

Let’s start with the last which is maybe. This has to do with your definition of what romance is. And this is either because you don’t have a full understanding of it or that you are indifferent about it. If you say no, it will definitely be because you see romance as a sexual activity e.g. pre-intimacy (the play you play to set the mood for sex). To me (and I am sure your pastor and Apostle Paul of the Bible also agrees with me that), pre-intimacy is a sexual activity.


pre-intimacy includes French kissing, necking, smooching, caressing, handling genitals, sexting, etc. This can as well be regarded as fornication, because of the standard for relationship with the opposite sex which Jesus has set in Matthew 5:28 thus “But I say unto you, that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart”.

Activities like hugging, holding hands and gentle strokes of hair in private rooms or compartment like the back seat of a car in the dark would not pass as pre-intimacy but would pass as highways to pre-intimacy and as such, risky. By this, I do not categorically mean that hugging, holding of hands and gentle strokes of the hair is fornication. My point is; doing those things in dark or lonely places with a person you have chemistry for is risky because it is highway (predisposes you) to pre-intimacy.

Critical Thinking
If I’m dating a girl, or engaged to a lady, and I hold her hands on the streets, and hug her before my friends and call her every day at a particular hour (taking into consideration that every time you call or receive the call of a person you are attached to and have chemistry for, you feel some sensational, emotional excitement), and if I get to help her fix those strands of hair that the breeze has put out of place, what would you call that? Fornication? I will call that romance.

Don’t forget the definitions earlier quoted. I am of no doubt whatsoever that holding of hands, calling, texting, chatting, being together always with another person of the opposite sex, hugging, pecking, buy and exchanging gifts, going out to programmes and places together with the person you are attracted to or who you have a private unique relationship with is romance! And if this is romance, Single Christians cannot only romance, but I doggedly say that Christian Singles in a relationship(s) romance!

No two people can marry without romance; impossible, unless one or both of them were forced/compelled to marry the other. The act of proposing marriage, accepting proposal, visiting families, choosing wedding dates and all that happens between when the attraction started till after the marriage terminates is romance.

However, is this romance good, healthy and recommended? Yes! Yes! and Yes! again. According to Rob (and I agree with him), two people of the opposite sex, who want to know each other better to know if they could marry or not, must share and have sexual attraction for each other. This attraction is what makes them to do everything they can to ensure the relationship work and grow into marriage. This attraction, according to him, is what makes it easy to forgive and overlook, because something is alluring (pulling, attracting, drawing, magneting, charming, fascinating and appealing-to) you. Therefore, it won’t be wrong, or sin, for such a couple to hold hands, hug, always be together, call each other, chat together, exchange gifts, visit each other while sharing an attraction. And all this is romance. The trouble is that such a couple must always know that without boundaries, such acts are highways to pre-intimacy which most times lead to sex.

How to Set the Boundaries and Enjoy a Happy Relationship
1. Avoid dark and secret places.
2. Avoid being alone together in a room and if you are caught up in this situation, DON’T YOU DARE TRY TO attempt physical intimacy (contact) – hold each other, etc.
You may want to some of my other related articles below and even if you don’t want to, follow me @AlrightsPassion on twitter. I tweet on controversial sex and relationship issues every Tuesday at 6pm
1. WHY PHYSICAL ATTRACTION IS GOOD http:///o6rholv
2. WHY SEXUAL ATTRACTION IS GOOD http:///nzorwsu
3. IMAGINING GOD AS YOUR LOVER http:///pxuyyp4
4. LOVE IS WHAT I KNOW, NOT WHAT YOU SAY http:///lfoyac3
5. HOW TO BE LIKE GOD IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP http:///qbluxak
6. LOVE, DREAMS AND MONEY http:///lf6qb7x

Don’t forget that –
It is your relationship with Jesus that makes every other of your relationship sweet, for without God, man is nothing and without His help, our relationship is nothing but hell. And…

We would like to know your opinion or have your questions on this matter. So, drop your comments. I will be glad to discuss with you further. Besides, we give free counselling at the Alright's Passion courtesy of our partners.

*yawns*

If i read that novel u wrote up there, make aeroplane jam me

Orijin101:
If i read that novel ur wrote up there, make aeroplane jam ma

I don't really know much on this subject but I personally think they should at least to have a little idea if they are sexually compatible , I for one won't want to get married to a bad kisser or someone who doesn't like kissing and there are guys like this out there.

So many dos and don'ts and rights and wrongs everywhere...IMO, do what you think is right..

I bet nobody will read this whole epistle of yours

So what are you saying nau?

Mods move this to story book section.

jboy73:


Mods move this to story book section.

elantraceey:
I don't really know much on this subject but I personally think they should at least to have a little idea if they are sexually compatible , I for one won't want to get married to a bad kisser or someone who doesn't like kissing and there are guys like this out there.

I find it funny when people put so much effort on romance and yet in the same relationship the man or woman is cheating or they end up fighting g!
why?

A Christian can romance and do all those sexual ish, but a born-again Christian should not think of it much less do it unless it's with your wife/husband.