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Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? - Family (5) - Nairaland

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by masqot(m): 8:08am On Mar 19, 2015
Marriage is all about understanding between man and woman. If he could reach understanding with his woman and her family, he should go and pay the bride price (important), go to Registry to formalise the marriage (important) and get his pastor's blessing no matter how small the ceremony ( maybe in the pastor's office)

2 Likes

Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Sunshinelady(f): 8:10am On Mar 19, 2015
QuiverBox:





Church wedding does not mean he will spend money.

The Church elders did not say he must do church wedding with receptions.

Church wedding simply means - officially ordaining / recognizing your union in church.

He should simply pick a date , invite family and friend and be joined in holy matrimony.

It must not be on Saturday morning oh. It can be anytime approved by the church.

Celebration can come when he has money.

EXACTLY. Wat will it take one to get blessed by a man of God infront of family? Wedding isn't only recognised wen there is heavy spending. D couple shuld do a quiet white wedding , & get God involved in their union. It says what God has joined together let no man put assunder, not what d elders hav joined together, or what d court hs joined together. Before, I don't tink hving concubines was a sin, but wen Christ came he renewd everything. & instituted d 'one man one wife' rule, so anybody goin contrary to dis is a fornicator/adulterer. & since Christ is d author/founder of modern Christian marriage, how can u say u r married wen u havnt involved Him oficially? The Church isn't just a house, it is a house of God , God's dwelling place. So please to every couple & intending couple, it won't take u much to just go infront of God & exchange vows. If u don't hv money, den postpone d reception for later, or make it low key

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Laredojohn(m): 8:11am On Mar 19, 2015
Traditional and court is the most important, nowadays people now invite pastors to bless the couple during this two, the white wedding is more of paprazzi, it's boils down to church blessing...which can be or should have been incorporated into the traditional and court wedding...

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by menxer: 8:13am On Mar 19, 2015
Why some pastors dey form? Na today single people dey fucck? D guy don even try settle d family dem still dey put unnecessary road block for his way.
I for send dem?

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by 123taiye: 8:14am On Mar 19, 2015
Some people believe that when you make you marriage vows at a Church or White Wedding you are exchange marital vows in the presence of God and that should make your marriage stronger. Guess what? Sorry to burst some bubbles - God is everywhere; your village, your room, your office. He is watching you in 3D.

Marriage is a social union, not a religious one; where a man is united to his wife by their traditions. If we want to bring Christianity into your wedding ceremony it is allowed, but it does not and cannot replace the traditional marriage.

White wedding is the tradition of the white man, traditional wedding is the tradition of the African. Once your bride's father has given you his daughter's hand in marriage she is your's 100% body spirit and soul.

The other question as per holding a post in the office, on the last day(judgement day) to those that believe

God will say well done my faithful

choir leader
pastor
Man of God
Boy of God
Bible Study Leader
Prayer Meeting Leader
usher
GO
Wife of the GO
Servant. Yes well done my faithful servant.

The choice is yours to make.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by jamesbridget13(f): 8:17am On Mar 19, 2015
ask ur friend to take his wife n parents to d pastor n elders to bless d marriage since he has no money to celebrate it. i too had my trad early this month but am still away from hubby cos church wedding is first week of may. infact my hubby pst warned dat we shld not be seen together in secret places. dats how it can be

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by irokop(m): 8:24am On Mar 19, 2015
kikelomojessy:
That one thing about dis churches, they will give u conditions and they won't lift a finger to help you. Oya tell dem to give u money for the church wedding nah.

He is saying cos of his post in church he can't leave, his conscience wud not let him. (u ar scared of ur pastor but if only its same way u fear and honour God)

Must u end ur life in that church? Oga please dnt use dis indecision and keep ma pwety sister waiting to be in her husband house oh.



This church post thing is absolute trash, let me tell dud there was a relation of my who happened to be a catholic Charismatic Movement member, during the time he was ripe and ready to marry he consulted one of their charismatic member who happened to hold one post at the sect, as their friendship or courtship was progressing towards marriage the said lady that is his wife to be conceived a baby.

To his surprise the lady said she Is going to get rid of it cos of her post at church because if their charismatic ppl know that they will not give her her rights and they may not attend the wedding cos of this stupid reason this lady aborted the baby.

Although my relative said he did advice her to live the pregnancy but the lady refused accept his idea, after all the deadly blood shade my ignorant and stupid relative went ahead and married this murderer since then no issue as in another baby refused to come.

Is this life? Is this faith? All the plastics and cups and rubber they gave her since 30 years ago is still laying about In their house unused, what a blunder what a mistake what an ignorant, guys you've got to be wiser, cheers every body.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by darmhey(m): 8:27am On Mar 19, 2015
As far as the groom has paid dowry, and both parents have given consent, they are good to go. Jesus did not say anything about white, traditional or church weddings. Those are just traditions

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by gbassa: 8:33am On Mar 19, 2015
Traditional marriage was the first and well known marriage here on Earth, all other marriages are just Secondary.
For me, the secondary marriages complicate issues to the both parties, and that causes the high level of single ladies and single men.
Please let this our generation should stop this plenty marriage in just one girl, wont they feed themselves and do other things?
I believe these are the causes of marriage break up.


Mhizizzy:
Trad wedding holds more grounds

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by mickey44(m): 8:39am On Mar 19, 2015
The church is d dwelling place of God n we r d members of His body. Marriage is one of d sacrament of d church instituted by christ Himself. A man shld leave his mother n father n be join with his wife n dey shall be ONE no longer two. If u r nt in communion with christ u r nth but with christ u r fulfilled. Pls my friends abide by d teaching of christ by obeying wot d church ask of u bcs all authority has bin gievn to d church by christ Himself. U will nt be known in d church except u have done wot he ask of u by marrying in d church so as to be in communion with christ who instituted marriage. Pls my friends be wise dnt let ur self fish act do wot is wrong in God's presence. Peace be with u

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by ezugegere(m): 8:44am On Mar 19, 2015
But Church wedding doesn't require much expenses like the traditional. Why can't he just do it? Unless he wants to be flamboyant, you don't need up to 50k to do Church wedding. Do it privately, on a Thursday!

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by olushowunm(m): 8:48am On Mar 19, 2015
SmartFaces:
Thanks people, your comments are encouraging. The court marriage has been done. The big deal for him is that he holds a position in his church. They are threatening to suspend him if he goes against their rules.
One alternative is to leave the church and their rules then join another church but he said his hearts and conscience won't let him.
... Church wedding does necessarily means you must expend huge funds... They can wear the same suit and gown both wore to the registry. Also, they can just boycott reception by handing people take-away packs and drinks after the church service ... So, that should not cost more than 50k. So let him do it if his conscience will not allow him leave the church...

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by solidifi: 8:48am On Mar 19, 2015
Traditional Marriage is the 1st and last marriage. Even that's the one attended by Our Lord Jesus Christ in Galilee and not in any church or synagogue and recognized by Christ himself. I believe in God, I believe church, but do not allow the confused church of nowadays run you down. Read your Bible and believe in it not church or pastor.

Churches of nowadays have been bastardized, commercialized, personalized, monetized, secularized and now politicized.
Use your brain.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Nobody: 8:53am On Mar 19, 2015
freecocoa:
It doesn't cost anything to get wedded in a church, except your pastor is making it mandatory to have a party aka reception after the wedding, in which case I say, kick his hungry a$$ and his church to the curb.

God bless you babe!!
This issue has been long over-flogged.
There is a very big difference between Church wedding and Reception.

The earlier people start acknowledging that, the better for all.

I have seen a couple that only did the signing of register/certificate in church and went home.

I have also seen the ones that signed the necessary then the reception was their trad.

3 Likes

Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by FFOD(m): 9:03am On Mar 19, 2015
Tashaamania:
OP, he is not buoyant enough to carry out church wedding?
Please when did the church start charging people for weddings

You'll be surprised how much churches charge and how much you're expected to "contribute" in envelopre to the priests and officiating ministers.
Some churches will even turn your wedding to a fund raising event for various items the church needs

2 Likes

Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by freecocoa(f): 9:04am On Mar 19, 2015
Kachisbarbie:


God bless you babe!!
This issue has been long over-flogged.
There is a very big difference between Church wedding and Reception.

The earlier people start acknowledging that, the better for all.

I have seen a couple that only did the signing of register/certificate in church and went home.

I have also seen the ones that signed the necessary then the reception was their trad.
Don't mind some people, using their hands to cause problems for themselves in the name of pastor said this.

I once followed my younger sister to a wedding(her friend invited us) at one Emmanuel Anglican church near Mayor bus stop Akwunanaw in Enugu state, babe na Cabin biscuit, groundnut and pure water them share right there in the church after they've been joined in matrimony, I really was surprised(i no go lie) but I had to understand that, that's what they could afford and it wasn't a crime, plus it didn't mean their wedding no complete. I chop my biscuit and groundnut come use the pure water wash am down jejely carry myself go house.

There's no law that says one must spend millions to treat people to a party after wedding.

3 Likes

Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by nnewa: 9:13am On Mar 19, 2015
I wonder why all the fuss.
u said the guy was in a rship.he waited till he did the traditional things.he fulfilled the requirements for the court wedding.
if he believes in solemnization of his wedding, why can't he fulfill the requirements and be free.
I believe he knows what he should do but looking for excuses.
and there is no church that brings stumbling block to the intending union of 2(male &female) consenting adults. I know many priests in the Catholic church that are ready to bless the union during traditional rites or in private arrangement.

let him do the needful & necessary. if he is a Christian he knows he should solemnize his wedding and take in his wife

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by kraftyiyk: 9:19am On Mar 19, 2015
to start with, is there any white man who bears a native Nigerian name?
is there ever any white couple who has done African traditional marriage?
why kill your self in a bid to imitate peeps who care less about you!
our cheap pastors are so autocratic in this regard, some even slap there members, especially when they discover you are the mumu loyalist...

@ OP, your hubbys is just not Man enough, what nonsense post does he hold that some1, a fellow man who has got 2 testes like him, will dictate what happens in his family.... let him jump ship ASAP, its a damn free world, no one should dictate for you in the name of religion.
and.. am sensing a little bit of jealousy on the pastors side, OP be warned,
Autocratic pastors like that are usually the ones who shines there the Congo of married women church members.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by kraftyiyk: 9:20am On Mar 19, 2015
to start with, is there any white man who bears a native Nigerian name?
is there ever any white couple who has done African traditional marriage?
why kill your self in a bid to imitate peeps who care less about you!
our cheap pastors are so autocratic in this regard, some even slap there members, especially when they discover you are the mumu loyalist...

@ OP, your hubbys is just not Man enough, what nonsense post does he hold that some1, a fellow man who has got 2 t£st£s like him, will dictate what happens in his family.... let him jump ship ASAP, its a damn free world, no one should dictate for you in the name of religion.
and.. am sensing a little bit of jealousy on the pastors side, OP be warned,
Autocratic pastors like that are usually the ones who shines there the Congo of married women church members.

1 Like

Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by rose4flower(f): 9:27am On Mar 19, 2015
ireneidiva:

Emmm...who says you must spend in a church wedding? Do the church ceremony with your family and forget the reception. Simple
Let me quote u reception or no reception u will still spend money my bro did his wedding last month @ one Church in ajangbadi can u believe dey said if dey don't pay d sum of 30,000 thousand dey won't join d couple & d wife is an active member of d church we av 2 start running helter skelter 2 get d money we were able 2 raise 20k dey still refuse d money until one of my aunt drop 10k. after dat dey cal d bride's mum & told her minister does nt eat rice bt semo or pounded yam d bride's mum av 2 leave d Church & run home 2 get pounded yam 4 dem dey even said dey don't want turkey except cow meat. when it was time 4 reception d chair we rented was nt enough d Church could nt give us dere chair dey said its nt allowed d girl is d youth leader her sister is a choir in d church her mum is among d gud woman of d chuch

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Aizenosa(m): 9:34am On Mar 19, 2015
My church states that once u have done traditional marriage, she is already your wife, church wedding is about blessing the marriage, abi dem nor dey respect culture for ur church, Christ adhered to culture and d wrong ones they practiced He explained it to dem through His actions.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Cmanforall: 9:34am On Mar 19, 2015
SmartFaces:
She she had been in this relationship for one year, he proposed, everything followed to their traditional marriage last months. But his church says they can't live together until the white wedding is done. He is not buoyant or ready for a white wedding now but has carried out all rights both legal and traditional as they both agreed. what should they do?
The question now is, at what point is marriage recognized and honoured?
Is it at the point of...
(A) agreement between both spouse?
(B) Introduction (both families meeting and knowing each other)?
(C) Traditional Marriage?
(D) Court Marriage? Or the mighty
(E) White Wedding?




For me i think these churches complicates issues.
please i need sincere judgments and opinion, no insults or name calling.
We are all here to learn.

I guess it's Assemblies.

It is not easy to do all the traditional rites and still continue with the white wedding.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Nobody: 9:42am On Mar 19, 2015
rose4flower:
Let me quote u reception or no reception u will still spend money my bro did his wedding last month @ one Church in ajangbadi can u believe dey said if dey don't pay d sum of 30,000 thousand dey won't join d couple & d wife is an active member of d church we av 2 start running helter skelter 2 get d money we were able 2 raise 20k dey still refuse d money until one of my aunt drop 10k. after dat dey cal d bride's mum & told her minister does nt eat rice bt semo or pounded yam d bride's mum av 2 leave d Church & run home 2 get pounded yam 4 dem dey even said dey don't want turkey except cow meat. when it was time 4 reception d chair we rented was nt enough d Church could nt give us dere chair dey said its nt allowed d girl is d youth leader her sister is a choir in d church her mum is among d gud woman of d chuch

Haba why now why did they have to do that its not fair

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by taiwoadetola83(m): 9:43am On Mar 19, 2015
white wedding does not necessarily need to be elaborate.They should just inform their pastor for their blessing with say ten people including both parents.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by FredHandsome(m): 9:51am On Mar 19, 2015
Blackett:
Go to a court and register your marriage.

Fvck the church, fvck the pastor.
... and fvck God too, probably? C'mon dude!
Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Grace2love: 9:51am On Mar 19, 2015
@0p, no pastor will force anyone to do white wedding or church wedding. The man needs to discuss with his pastor to make him know his capacity. The pastor must be considerate and bless them once the dowry has been paid.

The man should not leave the church because of marriage issue lest he has been planning to leave before just looking for avenue for his leaving.

The least marriage in my church is called ministers wedding consisting the pastor, the parents of the couples and the couples, period.

2 Likes

Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by santosesq1(m): 9:56am On Mar 19, 2015
If u ask me I telll u categorically dat church wedding is. A duplikation of 1 tin & also a SINread proverbs 6 vs 16. There re 6 tins d lord hates. D 7th one is n abomination b4 God,trying to sow seed of discord among breathen. The pastor will ask emediately they enta d church "who gave this woman to d man ? Yet will still go ahead later to ask if there is any1 who dosent want dem to be joined together ? If any1 stands up will he disolve d already blessed marraige by thiere God on. Earth parents ? He will also ask do u love this man/woman ? Wat if d devil sow seed @ dat tym ? Cox I hav seen it hapen @ ekete / warri. Can he conduct a weddin witout a trad marraige ? That's my humble submission. I stand to b convienced byond evry resonable doubth

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Kingsasian(m): 10:01am On Mar 19, 2015
Traditional wedding. Church wedding is the tradition of the whites.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by ireneidiva(f): 10:21am On Mar 19, 2015
rose4flower:
Let me quote u reception or no reception u will still spend money my bro did his wedding last month @ one Church in ajangbadi can u believe dey said if dey don't pay d sum of 30,000 thousand dey won't join d couple & d wife is an active member of d church we av 2 start running helter skelter 2 get d money we were able 2 raise 20k dey still refuse d money until one of my aunt drop 10k. after dat dey cal d bride's mum & told her minister does nt eat rice bt semo or pounded yam d bride's mum av 2 leave d Church & run home 2 get pounded yam 4 dem dey even said dey don't want turkey except cow meat. when it was time 4 reception d chair we rented was nt enough d Church could nt give us dere chair dey said its nt allowed d girl is d youth leader her sister is a choir in d church her mum is among d gud woman of d chuch
That is one strange church.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Gynacologist(m): 10:37am On Mar 19, 2015
taiocol:
Traditional Wedding is all that matters, fucck the church and white wedding
y u say Bleep d church?

1 Like

Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by fairprince(m): 10:38am On Mar 19, 2015
You are the one complicating the matter. Take your wife to the Pastor and church board. Two of you will be prayed for by d church in one evening like that after Bible study. If you have anything for refreshment, fine, if not, still fine. That is all. I have witnessed it several times in my church. They call it CHURCH BLESSING. One couple even came in suit and wedding gown once in my Lagos church. The pastor scolded them and told the next couple that would come not to bother abt all those paraphanerlia. It was snacks and fanta we ate that night. Pls stop accusing churches unnecessarily. Throw away shame and simplify ur life. Deme deme.

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Re: Churches And Wedding Wahala. What Is Your Take On This? by Gynacologist(m): 10:40am On Mar 19, 2015
sinaj:
I wnt deny my hubby of *** afta d trad. wedding sad

xo daz d church palava
d choch doesnt matter afta d trad. so far evrione recognises me as a marid person.
correct bab where fo ph u pin nah mk we get high..saw ur profile ur ma kinda fin

1 Like

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