I am not trying to start up a racial war here. This thread is not about wether you like inter racial relationships or marriages. This is about does inter racial marriages work, does it last. How do you figure that out? Well, it goes like this how many inter marriages do you know that have lasted up to the point where the kids are in college? That's what I would call work or lasted or even inter racial couples that have stayed together still after their kids have graduated from college?

For me here in Portland Oregon, I know of inter racial marriages but don't know one that have lasted. When I was back home, I knew one that lasted. It was a Black woman who married a White man. They had beautiful daughters and the lived happily and no problem. At the time I thought what is this White man doing in Africa. But that was his choice. So I guess one couple I know.

All the inter racial marriages I know here in Portland or I have been told about. The Black man falls in love, doesn't care what any one says. Before you know what's going on the White lady is pregnant. Before the parents ask is it a boy or a girl. The White lady is dragging him down the alter. Everything is still rosy and sweet. The Black guy rarely keep constant communication with his  people back home. He have no house back home in Africa.

Before you know it, he got a huge house with the help of the White lady. What some people refer to as White privilege. As for me right now if I go to get a loan for business or house, I am %100 sure I will not get it. Some say oh you have a bad credit, Zap. that. The credit report shit is part of modern racism. I can also quarantee you that if I hook up with a White lady and go for a loan I am likely to get it. Back to the issue, so the Black guy gets a house with The White lady. The fire is still burning everything is still rosy.

They have kids. Based on the experiences I have seen and the ones I have been told. Once the kids are in college. The White lady will do something or claim domestic violence. Guess what? In most cases the house is in the White ladies name. So what happens the White lady divorces the Black guy and kick him out of the house. I have probably heard over 6 stories like this just in Portland. I also know some inter racial marriages that are just starting out and it seems like I can even see the end of it turning to a failure, not wishing anything bad for any one but the pattern of White women divorcing Black men after their kids have gone to college is not something to ignore.

So, before you get off topic, does inter racial marriage work? How many people do you know that have inter racial marriages that have lasted?

Maybe a poll should be put on this to see what the percentages are. Because if over %90 of inter racial marriages fail, why waste your time, money, energy, and endure all kinds of bullshit just in the claim of being inlove?

Peace.

Almost my whole family is about inter racial marriage. . .

Like my father's parents. . His father is from China and his mother is a Malaysian and they got married and still is married to each other. And my mom. her father is from Mongolia and her mom is from Hong Kong and they are still married to each other.

And others to mention in my all mixed up family:-

1) My aunt (my mom's 2nd elder sister) is a Malaysian and she got married to a White British guy up till today - 27 years of marriage and they have a daughter and their daughter has 5 Photo Studios with her Scottish husband around Dubai and in the UK

2) My aunt (my mum's 3rd elder sister got married to a White American guy - 16 years now and it still lasted. They have two children and both are working right now. One is a Rugby player and the other one is an Accountant insome bank.

3) My aunt (My father's 2nd eldest sister) got married to a guy from India - 23 years of marriage and they have 2 children. One is an engineer for Shell and the other one is an Accountant

4) My aunt (My mom's younger sister) got married to a Jamaican guy and their marriage is for 12 years now and they have 4 children. 2 is in College and 2 is in High school/secondary school.

5) My uncle (My mom's elder brother) got married to a Philipine lady and their marriage up till this date is 21 years. They have 2 daughters. One is working in the oil and gas and the other one is studying in College.

I have more if you want me to go on. . .

To:Gabrywyl:

It looks like you have a diverse family relations. It looks like some of the marriages you mentioned was within the same race. It sounds like some of your relations married some people within Asia. The British and the Jaimaican marriage were the parents opposed to it and why do you think that this interracial marriages worked or lasted for all the marriages you stated?

I know plenty of interacial marriages in the US that last. One friend I have (black lady/white man) are married over 20 years. Oh, by the way, Beyonce's mom is BLACK. She is just light skinned, like Beyonce. Don't let the weave fool ya.

To:Prittigrrr:

Thanks for the correction. I just did a quick research on that. When I watched the interview about Knowles family, she looked like a White person. Maybe I don't know what's white and what's not these days. Bleaching cream and plastic surgery are all playing roles. Also if you know inter racial marriages that have worked compare it to the ones that have not worked. Because one may know 5 that have not worked and 1 that have worked. So put all the numbers out that way it makes more sense.

outlaws:



To:Gabrywyl:

It looks like you have a diverse family relations. It looks like some of the marriages you mentioned was within the same race. It sounds like some of your relations married some people within Asia. The British and the Jaimaican marriage were the parents opposed to it and why do you think that this interracial marriages worked or lasted for all the marriages you stated?

Yes, some are within Asia. Oh my my uncle is a Malaysian and he got married to an Arabian Lady for 23 years and they have 3 daughters. The first daughter graduated in Oxford University in the UK taking Law and she is now married to the King's son of Malaysia for 5 years now. And the 2nd daughter graduated in Nutrition for a Degree level in Malaysia and soon she will be married in June. And the last daughter is still in College studying Civil Engineering.

I have more and if I tell you about all of them it will go on for the whole day.

Why? Maybe because both couples could tolerate each other I guess? I notice that in my family, the ones marrying their own kind are the ones getting a divorce compared to the one whom are married with abother person from a complete different background.

And yes, some of them are married within Asia but mind you, each Asian country is completely different and we do not treat it as the same thing cause we are sooooo different in very aspect and every angle. Its like Africa, I cannot say each African country is the same cause each of them are different. Jamaica cannot be same with Liberia and Kenya cannot be same like Ghana and so forth.

Good point Gabrywyl

At the end of the day, same race marriage are better.

For me, the question is odd. Some same race marriages don't last either. I can't say one is better than the other, as it depends on each individual in the marriage. If there's some statistic out there that can help us with this discussion that'll be great. I do know that in some cases, an inter racial marriage might be more difficult due to OUTSIDE forces, and not necessarily the couples involved in it.

In the cases you mentioned, I'm sorry but it seemed the guys were using tthe women (to an extent anyway) and I don't see how that would work anyway. All this talk about bad credit being modern day racism just helps to hold you back and nothing else. Please go read Ben Carson's Gifted Hands or Think Big. I read them years back and that's how my thought process works. No one is holding me back, yes there's some white priviliege, but there's also lots of opportunities for black people in the US. You probably won't get loans because of your own doing and not some man trying to keep you down.

Anyone with a brain knows that same race and culture are the best.

Within one or two generation, you whole family will be scattered everywhere and your culture will be dead.

So and so is married to someone in India

,  in France

,  in Japan

---- in Egypt

Where is my sister? She in France

Where is my brother? He is in Japan

Where is my Uncle" He is in Puerto Rico

and so on?

People just talk, not knowing why they say things or if what they are saying makes sense. That's the beauty of nairaland.

Thats my opinion

& dat is wat matters

Interacial Marriage = 

comment reservoir filled to brim

Well if true love is involved, then yes, it will last.

@poster,

Yes it works, but only if you take the woman down to Nija to experience another life.

Yes it dioes work. . .all the time

i am getting really sick and tired of ppl talking abt inter-racial relationship like it is some kind of disease. they last like any other relationship, it all depends on the individuals involved. my extended family is a clear example, almost all of those that are married to some white chic or some other tribe seem to be doing just fine but those that married within our tribe seem to be the ones with one kind of wahala or the other. more so in my family line we got a lot of mixed blood, my cousins and i have at least one or more white person or foreigner in our linage and from the history we have, they stayed together as one family, so please, u guys need to give it a rest.

To:Fs:

I understand what point you are trying to make but to me it doesn't make much sense. First no body is holding me back and yes America will remain a forever racist nation as long as Blacks and Whites live together and yes white privilege and modern racism exist if you don't know just go into a black neighborhood and ask questions and look around. You don't even need to ask you just need to look around and go into a white neighborhood and do the same. The white privilege is clear. So you think you know much abi? How many black, white, racism, culture classes have you taken? I am sure not much.

Racism is so strong in most states in the U.S. excluding some states in the east coast where Black people have a lot of establishments. Even in these states where you have a lot of black owned businesses, a lot of doctors, lawyers, etc. in places like DC, NY, Chicago,Etc. there is still racism. But not compared to places like Washington, Oregon, Alabama, etc. Here in Oregon not only I feel it I can taste it all the times. So Fs what state do you live in to make you think there is no racism that Blacks are holding them selves back. Let me give you an example why credit check is a modern racism, credit check may apply to some Whites but it was created to promote White privilege. Ok, two teenagers got out of high school, one black and the other white. The black one got a job at Mcdonald because he is tired of looking for a better job. The white got a job as a receptionist. As they complete their studies in college. The black doesn't have a good job on his resume. The White have a good job on his resume. So who gets hired first. So guessed right. So the black dude still works at macdonalds with a college degree hopefully got a Black girlfriend. You know how demanding they are. So he is not making enough so he starts taking out all kinds of credit cards and loans and buying things on credit all of a sudden he can't pay them all on time so his credit is Zap.e.d. While on the other hand the White dude is enjoying white privilege. Get a credit card and don't even use it that much. Got a girlfriend hopefully she is White who is enjoying the same white privilege. This grows from one person to millions of people in the U.S. Why do you think there are so many Blacks in jail in the U.S. is it because they are rich and don't know what  to do with their money? Hell no. Is because the modern racism have hold them back so the only option to not be hold back is to go out to sell drugs, hustle, sell guns, smoke weed, the women get into prostitution, etc. So there you got it. I just want to refreshing you mind because I don't know if you have been white brain washed like some Blacks or if you are married to a White man for your papers.

For example I have only gone to one interview and met one Black hiring manager in the so many years I have been in Oregon. He is even engaged or married to a White lady, so he thinks from her rappa some times if you know what I mean. Is not there are not a lot of qualified Blacks who can work in the HR [human resource], is just racism is playing a part.

I have seen Blacks who say oh there is not much racism, Blacks are dragging them selves back by complaining. This people are hired into there position because they are just that one number the Whites need to diverse their workforce so they think that Whites are doing them a favor. They don't know they are doing themselves a favor. In case something like a lawsuit happen against them, they will say oh we don't discriminate, we have Ms. Fs, Black lady working here, we like Black people, bullshit.

So wash your eyes, before you say there is no racism, are you that one number in your work place that's representing all the Blacks in your work place?


And for others who say inter racial marriages are just like any other, you are dumb ignorant . Do you know what inter racial couples face each time they go out to a Black or White establishments? Do you know the kind of verdalism and racial threats they get in their neighborhood? Do you know the kind of comments and looks they get in public? Do you know how confused their kids feel about what race they belong to? So don't tell me that bullshit that all marriages are the same. I didn't know all this until recently so hear if you have ears. An Afrcan guy marrying an African woman, they will have peace other than maybe the lady will be bitching at times. That's prety much it. Inter racial marriage can even get you killed. It did back in the day and it still happens in 2009. If you don't know do your research before I bitch slap you back to Africa to learn your roots.

Ofcurse if you think this thread or title is stupid or that you are so ignorant that you don't have anything to post other than post Poo. around go find a thread that meets your dumb level of comprehension.


Peace.

@ Outlaws

I understand your frustration with America and racism. I was born and raised here and it is a racist society. However, the beauty of America is this: no matter what obstacles are thrown in your way, you make the difference in rising above them. You rise to the occasion and make it work. I come from a long line of people to whom education was everything. Though they had the education, they were many times held back from performing at the levels to which they could have. Did they let it make them sour? NO! They pushed us and lived their lives in spite of the obstacles. They achieved successes that were unheard of by blacks in their day and their kids have gone to Harvard, Welsley, Emory and many other great schools. Many of their kids went to historically black colleges as well and we are now doctors, lawyers, stock brokers, business people, government workers and on and on. Yes racism exists but I always tell my white friends, I am used to being underestimated. I have been black all my life and I refuse to let others define me or limit me and my goals and desires.

Now as to more interacial couples that have succeeded: I forgot the ones in my own family! My aunt is married to an Iranian man for 23 years now with 2 kids. A wonderful couple. Another cousin has a white mate for about 25 years. A friend's brother has been married to a white lady for 7 years now with 2 kids. My aunt's brother in law has been with a white woman for at least 17 years. As to the marriages that failed, I have 2 friends with sons who married white ladies and they failed and in each case, from the outside looking in, it appears the men wanted to marry the women but date other women, so who do I blame on that. Marriage in this country is an endangered species and cheating is the order of the day for some.

I have dated white before and it was like dating any other man in many respects with a few exceptions but I just prefer black men. Any marriage can make it black or white, interracial or not if the two parties commit to one another and to the marriage first and choose to love one another with all they have.

I'm sorry outlaws, I didn't read your whole post. I read prittgrrr's and I'm with her. Different strokes for different folk. I already said that inter racial couples face obstacles from OUTSIDE forces and that can be a point of tension. It's in my first post. I would hope inter racial couples know about the possibilities of these and are ready for it. I would also hope that they would move to an area that is more tolerant (as much as it can be), than stay in an area where they are continously taunted.

I'm not ignorant at all, far from it, and yes I know that. I'm pretty confident of that fact actually. So you can say whatever you want to say. That is your problem. No one said there isn't an undertone of racism in this country, even when people are not trying to be racist. But like prittgrr said many many Black people have risen above such nonsense and are doing pretty well. So it's your choice to make. That is all.

lol so I went back to read your whole post since I just don't feel like working. I have a question. Have you noticed that many of the Black people in top schools (Harvard, Yale, Princeton, etc) are children of African/Jamaican/Islander's immigrants? Have you noticed many of these same people at top companies? Why? Why aren't they being held back as much as other Black people?

Look, there's nothing wrong with African Americans. The problem is a psychological one which manifests in reality and continues to breed the cycle we see today. Many have been told they can't do A, B or C. Many have been told they can't go to college, etc. Many don't have role models so they do what they see others in their neighborhoods doing. The schools they have in these neighborhoods suck (since school funding is based on tax dollars and the neighborhoods themselves are poor) and some parents are not active in their kid's lives because they have 2, 3 jobs, so the kids are not really doing well in school. I understand this and I'm not blaming the kids.

But there are still choices. It's just harder. No one is forced to go sell drugs (well, most times anyway). There are people from these same neighborhoods that end up succeeding. People want things NOW. Have you ever wondered why you see supposedly poor kids from these neighborhoods in the best sneakers? While some of us working can't afford such shoes?

There is racism, not a doubt. But I really believe many are trying to rise above that. The example you gave about the two teenagers just seems like from the get-go everything was against the black teenager that no matter what he did, he'd still fail? Did someone force the black teenager to use the credit cards he got all randomly and then not pay what he owes, while the white guy didn't use his the same way and thus has better credit?

To answer some of the questions you asked of me. I live in NYC, previously lived in Atlanta and Boston. There's racism in these places too. And no, i'm not the only Black person at my job, there are a number of them and most are African or Jamaican immigrants.  One of our HR Directors is Black and at my previous company, there were Black HR people, including one who is now a Director at a big financial services company. She's Nigerian.

There is something about it that is just ain't right! I think for some Nigerians is truly love gone haywire while to some, it is just about the nappy dug-out! Mine lasted twelve years and was the best marriage I ever had. She was gone for most of those years and thank god there were no kids involved. I can honestly say that mine didn't work cause I prefer Nigerian women compared to any other women. I am a Hausa/Fulani guy but definitely love Igbo girls. I don't know why, that is just my preference. I am sure there are pretty women in other ethnic groupings, mine is just Igbo. My baby mama is Spanish and that one lasted about a year. I was tired of being around the family every weekend and there is just something going on every week with the extended family. I figure if i want to have a large family, I might as well stick around with my own pupils. So my advise is don't engage in it, stick with your own.

Interesting so far, will respond when I get a chance.